Hotel homebirth?? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 03:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello!

My husband is REALLY not in to having a home birth, because we would not be close to a hospital. So I thought maybe we could have one in a hotel across from a hospital? Has any one ever done this? I can not think of a reson why I could not, as long as my midwife is willing. (I am going to ask her on the 3rd.)

Laura wife to Chris proud mommy to our lil monkey (c-section 6-10-06), our other lil monkey (HBAC 3-08-09) Our next and last son (due by HBAC mid July 2011) and our angel (10-03-04). My middle son has many severe food allergies.

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#2 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 03:53 AM
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Never heard of this, but I don't really see why not. But would you really feel comfortable in a hotel? I don't know about you, but that's the last place I would want my face planted down on the bathroom floor after hurling in the toilet! lol, I was all over the place during my HB, but if you think it will work well for you, go for it! That's really cool that your dh isn't making you go to a dreaded hospital to have your baby, and he's willing to compromise and go to a hotel or something! Have you checked to see if there is a birthing center in your area? Perhaps that would be more comfortable and make your dh feel more at ease. The birthing center near me is beautiful and very homey. It's nicer than my house, if I could have brought my cats with me I might have had her there!
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#3 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 03:58 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I had looked in to a birth center, but just dont have the money. I honestly would feel just as fine in a hotel. As long as it is not a hospital room!!!! I understand his fear, as I am scared of her needed a hospital and being to far away also. But I would think as long as we clean up after ourselves ( and dont leave the place looking like someone was murdred) then it would not be a problem. I wonder if you ask for a room with no one near you if they would wonder why, lol.

Laura wife to Chris proud mommy to our lil monkey (c-section 6-10-06), our other lil monkey (HBAC 3-08-09) Our next and last son (due by HBAC mid July 2011) and our angel (10-03-04). My middle son has many severe food allergies.

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#4 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 04:04 AM
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lol, I know, I wonder what they'de think if they knew?! If you dont mind me asking, what do you think you're going to do with the sheets? Or are you bring your own? Are you planning to try a WB too? Also how far is the nearest hosp? Mine was was 20 mins to a horrible horrible small hosp or 1 1/2 hrs to the good hosp. (thats the one we ended up transfering to).
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#5 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 04:20 AM
 
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I have friends who rented an apartment in town for their homebirth, because their house was so far out and it was early spring when the roads flood badly there and are completely impassable for sometimes extended periods.

They got a place that charges by the month, so they just got it for about two mos I think. You might not want to rent a room just for a night while in labor, so something a bit longer would give you a better plan--even weekly--though actual dates can be so hard to predict and often are some time later than expected.

But as long as you can get comfortable, why not? And you don't need to be too close to the hospital, either! Across the street might be too close IMO. And don't get next to the manager's office...

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#6 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 04:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I think we would end up bring our own sheets. I dont plan on a WB, as I am not a small woman, and would need a BIG tub, lol. Well, not need, but would rather a big tub. There are plently of hospitals around, but they all suck (as all hospitals do) We will prob end up getting a room at whatever hospital the midwife tells us too. I love the extended stay hotels, with the little kitchen and all, so I want to look in to one of thouse. I think DH and I would both feel better being close to a hosptial, but not in one.

Laura wife to Chris proud mommy to our lil monkey (c-section 6-10-06), our other lil monkey (HBAC 3-08-09) Our next and last son (due by HBAC mid July 2011) and our angel (10-03-04). My middle son has many severe food allergies.

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#7 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 11:59 AM
 
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I have heard/read of doing a homebirth in a hotel. I would definitely want to check it out beforehand and possibly set someone to doing a thorough last minute cleaning, but I've heard of people doing it.

Last time DH and I stayed in a motel we got a naaasssttyyy room. Decent motel, it just appeared that the last people in our room had had a drunken orgy of some kind. It smelled not only of stale ciggaretted but also of stale beer and um, the bodily fluids that tend to result from wild orgies. So I would definitely be cautious about just going in in labor and renting a room after that lovely experience.
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#8 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 12:14 PM
 
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I recently had false labor in a hotel!!! While waiting for our room the hotel manager came over and asked me if I was all right...did I need anything, while another staff said"shouldn't she be at a hospital?"
So the hottub was too hot...I was not comfortable at all...the room was so hot and all night I kept getting up and laying with my head on the airconditioner!!(while my dh and 3 kids froze in their beds.)
And then nothing. He came a week later. But having him in the hotel would have beat the hospital any old day.
Goodluck to you. Check out the rooms beforehand...make sure they're cozy.

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#9 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 12:15 PM
 
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yeah, i agree. I'm thinking the germs in hotel room rival those found in a hospital, at least as far as dangerous for a newborn. I clean my OWN house for a hb, so I know I wouldn't feel too at ease at a hotel. I think the idea of renting an apt is a good idea for a couple months. Boy would you have some shocked neighbors though! I've wondered what to do because my local hospital is very interventionist and traditional, but the ones 45 minutes away are more open to natural birth. If i had a last minute transfer i'd rather have the ones farther away but uping the whole family for a month anticipating labor would be hard and a heck of a lot of work.

I dunno, especially hotels right next to the hospital. You might find the same germs in the rooms as in the hospital as the people who stay in them usually are visiting the hospital for some reason.

Is there another option you can think of?
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#10 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 01:06 PM
 
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I spoke with a midwife a couple months ago and she mentioned that when the ban on VBACS started taking effect she knew of some moms that labored near the hospital in a motorhome with their midwife and waited til the last minute to go in if they needed to. LOL I have actually had thoughts of doing this, if circumstances made it impossible to stay at home; we have borrowed a friend's RV before and it is comfy and nice. It's an option, at least!
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#11 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 01:28 PM
 
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I don't know .... I would think the hotel management would be freaked about liability. It wouldn't surprise me if there is some small print on the forms you sign in with that states you will not be using the room for anything other than typical night-time stay related activities (I have no idea how it would worded but some form of legalese to that effect).

Don't get me wrong, I think it's a great idea and I hope it's feasible but I just can't imagine anyone could get away with that.
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#12 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 01:40 PM
 
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I worked as a housekeeper in a hotel during college and all I can say is....no way! It was a large popular chain and the requirements for cleanliness were really very much on the surface. I was amazed at the frequency with which yucky stuff went on in hotel rooms. eewww!

Ever since then I detest staying in hotels for any reason.

One of the benefits of a homebirth is that you and your baby are accustomed to the bacteria in your home. This is not the case in the hospital, yet there they take extra measures, usually but not always successfully, to keep things sterile. A hotel room would be full of lots of yucky foreign things, lots.
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#13 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 02:01 PM
 
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do you have any friends or family that live closer to a hospital that would let you birth at their house?

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#14 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 03:01 PM
 
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My midwife and I discussed this during my last pregnancy. Our house was undergoing major renovations and we had not been able to move in yet and so we were living at an extended stay hotel.

When I hit 36 weeks, I was increasingly concerned because I had no relationship with a doctor or a midwife with hospital priviledges and I was very upset at the idea of a hospital birth at all. My midwife would have been willing to do a hotel-birth, she herself had traveled for her delivery staying in a hotel (but birthed at the hospital). But I was dead set against it. For a few reasons: 1. These places aren't all that clean. And some extended stay places have minimal housekeeping - like you get new towels every 3rd day and stuff. 2. Most places, while they may have kitchenettes are very very basic. In fact, when I first checked in I was given a closet sized room (like reach out and touch both walls tiny) and the bathroom only had a shower. Dd was 2 at the time and so I pitched a fit until I got the only room in the place with a tub. It was the handicapped room and I shared a paper thin wall with the main office. And despite this room being "wheelchair friendly" It was really really small. I wandered through a good portion of that labor (back labor and a posterior baby) and I never would have been able to move in the hotel. and 3. I wasn't comfortable there. I wanted to be at home with my own stuff and my own food and my own smells etc.

In the end, we moved into the house at 38 weeks and Ds was a week late giving us enough time to semi-unpack and get settled. I got my homebirth and it was amazing. And don't discount waterbirth/tubs just because you are heavy. So am I, and hydrotherapy is amazing during labor. That tub was my best friend while in transition. I also don't live all that close to a hospital and it worked out well. I think maybe you and your Dh should address his issues with being at home and go from there. Talk to your midwife about her requirements for transfer. If you are meeting requirements for homebirth your chance of transfer is probably pretty low.
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#15 of 25 Old 03-24-2006, 06:11 PM
 
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I didn't read all the previous posts so maybe this has been stated already. I would NEVER choose to birth in a hotel. Those places are so full of germs it is unbelievable. They are even more unsafe than a hospital in my opinion. If a hotel or a hospital was my choice, I would choose hospital.

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#16 of 25 Old 03-25-2006, 08:28 PM
 
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i'm wondering about a noise complaint. i know that i could have been heard a block away during my hb. it's just amazing the noises that you can make during labor!

Mama to dd 2/06 and ds 12/09
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#17 of 25 Old 03-27-2006, 08:45 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UmmBnB
I worked as a housekeeper in a hotel during college and all I can say is....no way! It was a large popular chain and the requirements for cleanliness were really very much on the surface. I was amazed at the frequency with which yucky stuff went on in hotel rooms. eewww!

Ever since then I detest staying in hotels for any reason.

One of the benefits of a homebirth is that you and your baby are accustomed to the bacteria in your home. This is not the case in the hospital, yet there they take extra measures, usually but not always successfully, to keep things sterile. A hotel room would be full of lots of yucky foreign things, lots.
Ugh, I knew it. I'm afraid to ask but I have to... what went on? (sort of OT, but perhaps will help the OP make her decision?)

I heard the comforters never get washed and that water glasses just get wiped out with the bathmat and put back with a cover on top...
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#18 of 25 Old 03-27-2006, 09:01 PM
 
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I labored in a hotel for my last birth until my water broke and we went to the hospital (about 34 hours). We were at the hotel for about 6 hours and it was fine with me. I was up walking around alot and I didnt sleep in the bed, I didnt sleep much on the second night of labor.
We traveled to the town I was to give birth in and ended up going home after being treated like crap at the hospital and only dialated to 2cm. SO when I was ready to go back to manhattan we rented a hotel until I was absolutely sure that I wanted to go back to the hospital. The second time to the hospital was better but after having the baby I wanted to sleep that night but was constantly woken by some prodding nurse. That wouldnt happen in a hotel, I should have gone home sooner.
I would recomend staying in a smaller room(while waiting for labor to save $) and cleaning it myself or have dh do it and also bring my own sheets, plastic sheets and towels ect. Have a room with a fridge and microwave and maybe splurge on room service! Better then hospital food!!
When you go into labor move to a suite( Bigger tub, its gotta cover the belly!)and have a support person clean for you. Having had a c-sect and a vbac that was 40 hours long and an hour from the hospital I gave birth in I would rather birth in a hotel then a hospital. There is only so long that germs can survive in a oxidated environment, mostly they are passed from coughing or whatnot and if you can clean then I dont see a problem.
When i was at the hotel I was in labor land and didnt think of anything besides relaxing between contrax and I was fairly quiet during labor as well so I wasnt worried about that.
If you are comfortable then I say go for it. No one will push interventions at a hotel.
You need a place to give birth and you can bring all your own stuff, you dont have to drink out of their cups or sleep on their sheets or comforters, and you can bring a cooler of food stuff ect. I think hospitals are far riskier when it comes to getting sick. Thats where sick people go, I didnt want to touch anything! Your chances seem better in a hotel and if your options are limited then I would go for the hotel.
~Angela~
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#19 of 25 Old 03-27-2006, 10:02 PM
 
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What about at your midwife's house/clinic/etc??? We had similar concerns, and my MW said we could birth at her place. It's right across from the hosp. But you should talk to her about all this, and what the chances REALLY are of a long trip to the hosp in an emergency. And how far is "far" to you? If you were speeding, would it really be that bad?

It made me feel better when our mw said that "emergencies" that happen at home aren't as urgent as those in the hosp. b/c you don't have drugs in your system to complicate things. And also, she has lots of great emergency tools, she's a trained professional, she knows how to handle this stuff. Just talk to her about it all, and maybe she'll be able to ease your fears.

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#20 of 25 Old 03-27-2006, 11:20 PM
 
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we thought about it. Having a midwife assisted homebirth is illegal here so we thought about crosing the border to birth.

I would ook for an extended stay hotel like Ressidence Inn. Kinda a spendy but all the aminities of a home. Including dishes, cook wear, dishwasher, grocery service (you call down with your list adn tehy bring it to you - that could be nice after labor) a living room and bedroom (perfect for recieving guest) . You might also want to look into soething with a jucuzzi sweet. even if you don't labor much in water it can be nice to have just in case.

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#21 of 25 Old 03-28-2006, 04:35 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Quagmire
Ugh, I knew it. I'm afraid to ask but I have to... what went on? (sort of OT, but perhaps will help the OP make her decision?)

I heard the comforters never get washed and that water glasses just get wiped out with the bathmat and put back with a cover on top...
Well the cleaning was very much just on the surface. Sure they used industrial strength cleaners but it was more about making sure it looked OK than if it was really clean, iykwim.

The blankets and comforters were washed once a quarter or as needed. Sheets were washed daily with industrial strength detergent in super hot water and dryers. I hear folks often say that they take their own sheets when staying in hotels. I'd say the sheets are probably the cleanest thing in a hotel room!

As far as what went on...well, lots and lots of parties. Folks do things in hotels that they'd never do in their own home, or that they are escaping their home to do. Lots of leftovers from various sexual encounters. Lots and lots of porn left behind, along with the remnants of whatever went on with the porn. And the fact of the matter is, if it wasn't a visible stain, it didn't get cleaned. Lots of really disgusting toilet related things.

ugh - god that was a horrible job! I only lasted a few months. I then moved to working at the front desk of another hotel. Similar issues...I just didn't have to clean up after them!
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#22 of 25 Old 03-28-2006, 08:22 PM
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I've now decided that sleeping in a hotel is not something I EVER want to do again, LOL! How discusting!!!!! The comfortor and blankets are not washed after every use?? WHAT? Shouldn't that be illegal? I'm in total shock here!

I don't want to shoot down your plan of HBing in a hotel though! Please, do whatever makes you comfortable, just as long as you don't have to go to a hospital! Like someone else said, I would birth in a trailer or a backseat of a car before I would go to a hosp. willingly! Before I hired my MW, I had a OB and she was just awful. Awful! I remember waiting over an hour and a half to see her and she was in the room for less than 5 minutes! And to make matters worse, I asked her what I should be looking for or what to recognize as real labor vs. false labor. And you know what she told me? "We'll talk about that at 32 weeks." I was about 29-30 weeks. REGARDLESS of how far along I am, is it too much of a bother to tell me what to look for?? I knew at that point that I was doing something wrong, and decided to hire a MW. I had already been tossing the HB idea around, but my OB didn't do those, let alone condone them.
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#23 of 25 Old 03-28-2006, 10:00 PM
 
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oh i got that too. i forgot what exactly it was,,,oh yeah, labor positions. With my first i was with an OB and i asked about the diffrent kind of labor positions i could use....i got the same answer "we'll get to that much later". made me feel like i shouldn't have even asked the question.
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#24 of 25 Old 03-28-2006, 10:12 PM
 
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I used to work in a hotel, and it's true...they hardly ever wash the comforters.

If I were to ever birth in a hotel, I would have someone come in to clean it very, very well and bring my own sheets and blankets.
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#25 of 25 Old 03-29-2006, 01:56 AM
 
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we won't even touch the comforter at hotels. we kick them off the bed and then kick them across the room. I bring my own blankets. we also don't walk barefoot or sit on the floors.

but if you bring your own linens and stuff to protect the floor, you should be equally protected from it.

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