Hate having to jump through hoops to have a homebirth!!!! (rant....and long) - Mothering Forums

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Old 09-27-2006, 12:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Okay, this is a really long complicated story, but I'm just feeling so frustrated and having trouble seeing the end of it and I just wanted to let it all out in the company of other like minded mommies!!!!

A couple years ago (in between babies #2 and #3) I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. I had a partial thryoidectomy and never had any radiation or supplemental thyroid stuff. It was recommended that I get it checked once a year and have an ultrasound done on the remaining half to make sure that nothing is growing on it. No biggie. Fast forward past pregnancy #3 and a beautiful homebirth delivery. Baby #3 is a year and we start trying to have baby #4. We try and nothing is happening. Finally when I'm about ready to give up, I switch my insurance back to Prime. (This means I get priorty treatment at my local huge military hospital, but I can't deliver w/my homebirth midwives on this, I have to switch back to Standard.) I'm thinking that my thryoid has finally kicked the bucket and so I can't get pregnant. Well, just as I switch back to Prime, I get a positive pregnancy test. Yeah, I'm pregnant! Well, I think I'll just stay on Prime and get my thryoid checked out and then go get seen by my midwives after I switch back. But I'm afraid that the midwives will be full (they only take like 25 deliveries a month) by the time I get this all straightened out. So I go see them anyway. The found midwife is lovely and totally understanding. But there are some big questions on my dates and so I agree to do a dating ultrasound (please don't flame me, it's the way I'm choosing to do things). Because I'm on Prime, the insurance will only cover ultrasounds done at the military hospital. So I have to go in, get a positive test with them and go to a RIDICULOUS OB intake class. It is supposed to last FOUR HOURS and I know we'll have to do all sorts of crap; like watch a video on why breastfeeding is best and a video on *labor* like it is in the hospital (flat on your back, iv, epidural, push when we tell you junk junk junk). I know it is going to come up that I had two previous homebirths and I don't want to have to explain the whole damn thing to these ignorant ob nurses. Blah blah blah. Plus, I still need to see an endocrinologist about the whole thyroid thing and so I've got to been seen at the hospital for another month or so before I can switch back. So I'm going to sit through the ob intake class to have my five min dating ultrasound and then I'm never going back to the ob clinic again.

I'm sure this all sounds so ridiculous. I actually feel much better sitting down and typing it out. I'll just bring my crocheting and have some quiet time while listening to the nurse blather about care at the hospital. I'm just so happy I trust my body and I don't have to DELIVER in that place.

SAHM to four beautiful babes :
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Old 09-27-2006, 01:03 PM
 
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I'd be so tempted to wear an advocacy shirt to the class.

They seriously expect someone on her *4th* pregnancy to go to the class? Call them up and tell them you can't get anyone to watch your 3 kids that day and that you'll have to bring them to the class. If they aren't smart enough to waive the requirement then they deserve to have your kids running around. I'm sure your children are normally perfectly able to sit quietly for 4 hours , but for this you're going to want to encourage whining.

Ooo, any of your kids still nursing? You could have some fun with that too!
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Old 09-27-2006, 01:11 PM
 
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Wow, that is alot of hoops! Though, from the perspective of someone whose dad was in the military my whole life, it doesn't surprise me.

Blech!

Now go enjoy your pregnancy! ....and CONGRATULATIONS!
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Old 09-27-2006, 01:20 PM
 
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4 hours?! I hope that its in the evening or weekend, or do they expect people to take time off work for something like that? I love all the freedom and choices we have in childbirth

Maybe you can view this as a time to get educated and help other women who have to give birth in that place. Take notes and offer support and advice for other mothers in the system who have to deal with that.

Just trying to turn it into a positive experience.

Expecting #9.  Always busy hsing.
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Old 09-27-2006, 01:59 PM
 
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Have you taken the class before at the same base? I think each base is different. At mine they didn't even talk about birth much. It was more prenatal care, make sure you drink water, take your vitamins, don't smoke, etc. Then there was a small amt of infant care stuff but nothing too bad at all. It was very very basic.

Honestly it's going to be more hassle to get out of the class than to go to it. I would just bring some knitting, a book, whatever, and use it as a nice little 4 hour break! You should sit there and read mothering magazine! Maybe one of the moms will want to borrow it!

Rachel, mom to Jake (5/04) and Alexia (7/07) a surprise UC thanks to hypnobabies!
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Old 09-27-2006, 03:39 PM
 
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*

"It should be a rule in all prophylactic work that no harm should ever be unnecessarily inflicted on a healthy person (Sir Graham Wilson, The Hazards of Immunization, 1967)."
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Old 09-27-2006, 11:24 PM
 
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ugh- yes bring the kids!

I had ultrasounds btw. Hugs mama. It is worth it all.
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Old 09-28-2006, 01:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Unfortunately it is during the day! Blah. Happily enough DH can take the time off because the older two have a preschool program they love and would not want to miss to sit w/mommy in a boring class.

Ah well. There is just no getting out of it. I did tell DH that I was going to treat it like a bit of a break for me and bring some handwork (crocheting/knitting/cross stitch) to work on. I never have time to do it during the day and if they are going to take up four hours of my time, I'm going to enjoy the little break.

Thank you all so much. It is so nice to have some commiseration and sympathy. DH is very sympathetic, but he also doesn't understand why I get so worked up about it. Of course, he's very compartmental and sensible and I'm hormonal and pregnant.

SAHM to four beautiful babes :
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Old 09-28-2006, 06:44 PM
 
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I am also a military spouse who homebirths. With my last kiddo, I saw a lay midwife which in the state of Maryland is illegal, so I continued my OB care on Base but with a family practice physician. Where we live near Bethesda Naval Hospital a few of the Family Practice physicians do Birth. If you go to them you do not have to do the class it is actually done in 15minutes individiually with the nurse. Also you will see the same provider for all of your care and if you choose to birth in the hospital they will call them for your birth none of this whoever is on call crap.

Just an idea. Only high risk mommas need an OB IMO.
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Old 09-28-2006, 06:47 PM
 
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Oh I am sorry to hear that. At least you don't have to birth there. I did the huge military hospital birth once, not an experience I would wish on my enemy
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Old 09-28-2006, 11:08 PM
 
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I just wanted to commiserate -- "hoops" were the thing that caused me the most anxiety during my homebirth, and mine was completely uneventful. I was just fretting over every little thing that could rear its head and force me into a UC or hospital. It's so uncool that we're treated like we can't make decisions in our own best interests.

OT -- When I was in grad school, I had insurance for being a teaching assistant that required I do everything through the student health center. I certainly couldn't afford to go elsewhere out of pocket. Well, they had this required class called "Body Talk" that they required women to take if they wanted free condoms, birth control of any sort, or a pap smear (and a couple other things I can't remember). It was a class all about STD's and how to put on a condom and so forth. There were also disgusting slides of what STD's can do to you. It was a big scandal on campus because men really never had to take the class unless they wanted free condoms, but if women wanted a PAP SMEAR (!) they couldn't get it without the class. This included grad students who might have been sixty years old and/or married with kids, and might have found themselves sitting awkwardly in this class with eighteen year olds who were their own students. Anyway, there were all kinds of letters to the editor about it, and some womens' group protested it, and eventually they let us get pap smears without it. I needed one before that, though, and sat through the class just oozing discontent. I'm sure I made everyone uncomfortable. Hoops for health care is, in my opinion, like something out of the Soviet Union. Totally uncool.

Good luck on getting through it all!
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Old 09-28-2006, 11:30 PM
 
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If you can manage it, bring a book, and if the teacher's like "you have to pay attention" say "I've already had three and believe me you aren't telling me anything I don't already know."
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