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Why Homebirth?

2K views 35 replies 29 participants last post by  Meg_s 
#1 ·
I'd love to hear everyone's reasons for choosing a homebirth.
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I had 2 great natural births in the hospital, so why mess with a "good" thing? I HATE riding in the car when I'm in labor. I HATE sleeping in a hospital bed. I HATE being bugged all the time by the nurses. I disagree with a lot of the "necessary" policies/practices....etc.


I want to be in my own home, in my own bed, with my family and things around me. I want for us all to snuggle up on our bed with our new baby. I want it to be relaxed and peaceful with NO flourescent lights!


You?
 
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#3 ·
All those reasons too. Also, political stance against the terrible treatment of pregnant moms and newborn babies in this country. A lot of anger and sadness about an unneccesary, manipulated c/s with #1 as well as knowing that in my city staying at home is about the only way to avoid the same with #2. Hatred of being treated like just because I have a child in me means that I should be treated like a child as well. Frustration over nosy nurses putting in their two cents whenever the baby is born and I'm caring for it. Strange, unexplained requirement that your baby be taken away from you to the nursery at least once a day regardless of how healthy they are. The vast amount of dangerous, drug-resistant diseases swimming around every inch of a hospital and those who work there. The fact that signing the paper to check yourself into the hospital automatically releases hospital staff to do whatever they "deem necessary" including painful, useless, episiotomy without permission or explaination. The god complex that many doctors exhibit. The lithotomy position.
 
#6 ·
All of the above. I just want to be left alone, I want to labor how I want to, I don't want someone bothering me, the call lights going off, people coming in and waking me up when I just finally got to sleep, the nurses pestering me about needing to take my baby to the nursery, the list goes on and on. DD1 was born in the hopsital, it was a fine birth, it was probably a great birth as far as hospital births go.

DD2 was born at home, it was absolutely beautiful. No one telling me to get out of the water so they could check me, I was left alone to wander through my house laboring exactly how I pleased. I climbed in my tub when I felt like it, I never had to say "I feel like pushing", I did everything how I wanted to not how someone was telling me to. I caught dd2 myself, got to find out she was a girl, put her to breast right there in the tub while I was waiting for the placenta to come out, the MW never touched me or my baby during all of that, that was beautiful. I got out when I felt like it, my MW helped me clean up, we ate lunch, and she went home. We had to the rest of the day to ourselves, it was wonderful. My not so homebirth DH was raving about it, he had to call his bro and tell them they had to have a HB for their baby.
 
#8 ·
1. Last time my instincts told me to stay home. I didn't because we'd not done any planning for a homebirth, but I haven't forgotten that intense need to stay in "my place" to birth.
2. I want to experience this birth, and more importantly, my first few days with my new child, in a comfortable environment without constant interference by hospital staff.
3. I am not sick. I am healthy and my body has proven its ability to birth a child without any significant intervention. If I find that the baby or I need medical attention beyond what my MW can provide, I will go to the hospital. Otherwise, we just don't need to be there.
 
#9 ·
All of the above, plus we have no medical insurance. $2,000 vrs $10,000 plus is a huge difference.

And yea.. telling me I have to lay on my back while in labor, nurses giving me stupid parenting advice even though hello, I have other children. Being woke up in the middle of the night for blood pressure checks or just to ask me my name.
: OH and visitors coming and going when THEY feel like it. The stupid phone ringing when I am sleeping. Sharing a room with someone else... Argg....

DS is due today.. but it doesn't look like he will be showing up. I hope it is soon, then I can share the difference between three hospital births and a home birth.
 
#10 ·
Being woke up in the middle of the night for blood pressure checks or just to ask me my name. OH and visitors coming and going when THEY feel like it. The stupid phone ringing when I am sleeping.

I totally agree with that!

I'm loving this! And the "why hospital" is an excellent question.

We also have no health insurance so the $1800 is a lot more feasable for us.
 
#11 ·
All of the above, plus -- I REALLY hate people telling me what's good for me. About anything. They can't know. And I didn't want to have people all up in my business about breastfeeding. I wanted to do it on my own, and seek help if and when I needed it. And finally, I'm really disturbed that the medical institution has claimed so much power in how we parent. I reject the hospital as my pregancy/birthing/parenting authority, and by doing so, I think I take away some of its power.
 
#13 ·
Being able to lay in your own bed afterward with your dh, and gaze at your baby, while the doula keeps the ringers off and the house dark and quiet.

No one even knew our ds was born for about 4 hours...only me, my husband, the doula and midwife.

The midwife had to run to another birth(Ds was UA, but she came to check us out afterward) and the doula stayed.

She was a homebirthing mom herself, and knew exactly what to do. She cooked up a freaking storm, and turned all the ringers off and kept the house perfectly peaceful. She helped us with our herbal bath...ahhh i'm rambling!!

Homebirth is the way to Go. I am afraid of hospitals, and to be honest, I'd be a TERRIBLE patient, because I wouldnt do a darn thing they said!
 
#14 ·
Well I haven't had a homebirth yet, but I'll tell you why I'm going to have one (someday, in a few years or so)

I don't like being bugged while I'm in labor. I don't want to have to move -- by car, by elevator, by anything. I want to KNOW my provider, not just get some random nurse and some random doc who are on-call. Plus hospitals are gross. Seriously, I put my doula clothes in a bag, wash it on hot, and scrub myself down whenever I return from a hospital birth.
 
#16 ·
Everything above, which seem more to be more tangible aspects to me. But there is something else.........Birth is such an intimate time. There are a few times in your life when you are completely vulnerable. Birth is one of those times. I feel a need, a drive that I can't explain, to not leave my home to have my baby. When feeling vulnerable, I need to be where I feel safe and protected to balance that. I can't release and let myself BE as open as I need to in birth, if I am in a hospital. I have had 3 hospital births, all vaginal, 2 unmedicated.....but there was something about those births that was not right.

Just as any other mammal will have emotional disruption when disturbed during birth, so will humans. The difference is, humans have the ability to reason, and to convince themselves that the hospital is not only and okay place to birth, but somehow superior.
 
#17 ·
This is true. I always sought out the tightest smallest corner to wedge my huge round self into when i was having a baby. In the birth center where I had dd, I set up the birth stool in a tiny nook between the bed, wall, and nightstand. My big ole dh could barely fit next to me in the floor, and the midwife literally lay in the floor and looked from a distance.

I need that privacy...and being UA was absolutely it for us. Just me and dh, i didnt have to feel weird being around him.
 
#18 ·
ditto ditto ditto...

Add to that that when I read the 'contract' for the birth center at our military hospital I read things like 'You MUST have a heplock, NO CHILDREN allowed, NO video taping or photos of procedures'
Um...no thank you...my birth, my way!

Also--I HATE the idea of someone attending me that I've never met before--even if the nurses or Dr are 'good' it is still annoying to not even know them or know where they are coming from ya know??
 
#20 ·
Ditto to everyone. I want to labor and birth in the comfort of my own home with the freedom to do what I want and need. After birth, I don't want anyone touching my babies and telling me what I should do with them. Plus hospitals are full of sick people and germs, why would I want my healthy newborns around that?
 
#21 ·
After the precip labor and birth of my second son (first two were hospital births -- 1st medium-high intervention, 2nd lower-intervention, mostly because there just wasn't time LOL) I found myself pondering birth. I fell in with an online community that included some homebirthers who were comfortable sharing their experiences and I appreciated them. Among that community I found myself led to read a LOT LOT LOT about birth and found myself feeling more and more disconnect from the medical model. I knew I wanted a low intervention birth, felt really drawn to waterbirth and most of all -- didn't want to have to fight battles in a hospital room, whether over birthing or postpartum care.

(For example - When my oldest was born they just kept bringing and bringing the Circ forms -- they buried them in other forms, they bothered us about it -- it was clear from the beginning we had no intention of circing and in the end I had to get my OB involved to put a stop to the harassment. And then the hospital charged us for the circ anyway -- Best part of this story: Billing Clerk who said to me "Are you sure he isn't circumcised, it's pretty much a standard procedure" Me: "Do you want me to bring him down and show you?" We had such sub-par nursing care that I filed a complaint with the hospital. )

All of this led me further and further into the homebirth camp, so when #3 came around, I felt like it was the only really plausible option. I had to drag my husband into it but it was worth it all.
 
#23 ·
What an awsome thread

Just had to
to what everyone has said above!
Yes hospitals are for SICK people and no matter how "nice" the hospital is...they still treat you as if you have a problem waiting to happen...like, "everything looks fine....NOW...but you never know...."
:

One of my BIGGEST problems were being hooked up to all the "necessary monitors"

I had two natural "nice" hospital births and what I learned from them was that I really need nothing they can provide me...really....
Both births I left with the feeling that, "geesh...I wish I could have just stayed home and avoided this headache

but both times I went cause of our state's "legal m/w issues"
: I thought there no other option for me


*the strap-on monitors made me feel constantly PUKEY!
*the b/p cuff always tightened like majic durring each and EVERY contraction...AKKKK!
*The nurses made me so mad constantly asking me "are you sure you don't need anything for pain?".....yeah and they always ask you in such a vulnerable stage too

My last birth the darn nurse actually brought in a syringe of demerol and left it on my bedside stand!!!


What else...
* I wanted so bad to have the lights dim the entire time but come pushing time they "HAD" to switch them back to "BLINDING" for the birth
:

Oh and after the birth...
*They take the baby away for all the IMPORTANT stuff that absolutely CAN'T WAIT
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*Each delivery I felt like I had to "ask" the nurses permission to keep my own baby
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*My second baby had some breathing issues and when I FINALLY got to nurse her the "OH SO HELPFUL" nurse told me to not be surprised if my baby did not latch


And to top it off I will say a great big DITTO about the GROSS GERMY accomodations!:puke
***I witnessed the cleaning lady in my room with her one rag and buckett...she started in the bathroom mopping up my bloody mess THEN preceded to use the SAME rag and SAME buckett of suds to clean off all my countertops...INCLUDING my bed-table that the food goes on ***AGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!***
Oh yeah...hospitals are such a more sterile invironment and far superrior to our "germy" houses to deliver a baby (note sarcasm)

I sure hope and pray that I can fulfill my deepest desire to birth at home for our 3rd and final baby!
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#24 ·
Good luck to ALL you mamas who are planning a homebirth! And congratulations to those of you who have done it!

We're halfway in between now, since the birth center I was going to deliver at decided that they were no longer attending births IN the center, but only in the local hospital.

That is to say, *i* am halfway between now. DP (though we only found out today and haven't extensively talked) seems to be pushing toward a birth center which is farther away from home (two hours) instead of homebirth.

I have many, many, MANY of the same reasons as you all, but my reasons now include the fact that I do NOT want "routine" procedures performed on me- in my mind's eye, and though this will be my first, I do believe that childbirth in and of itself is a) enough to be thinking about during the actual process without people harassing me about other things, b) not something i want to share with a zillion people, and c) a very natural process, and to me, personally, a challenge of strength and a symbol of femininity. I don't need ANY of that tampered with by 12 year old doctors and annoying nurses who are transferred from one hall to another, carrying goddess-knows-what on their hands and scrubs and breathing disgusting hospital germs into my face and DP's face and DC's face.
 
#25 ·
I should tell you that we traveled 90 minutes one way for my dd's prenatal care and birth.

Many couples who lived far from the birth center just rented a motel room down the road, and spent the last few days hiking the beautiful mountains nearby waiting for real labor to kick in.

we drove it, and made it in 70 minutes in the middle of the night.

riding in labor is no fun at all, but it isnt the end of the world if you have to do it.
 
#26 ·
I chose homebirth because I had a horrible first experience in a hospital and I wanted to have total control over my body and my birth, and the only place I could do that was at home. I KNEW my body could do it, that my body was NOT broken, and I proved that to myself and to the world. Oh yes and there is nothing more wonderful than climbing into your own bed after giving birth and snuggling with your perfect newborn baby, his hair sticky with goop and blood because no one is whisking him away to a nursery to have a bath, and the next day when you feel a little better, you take a long hot shower with your DH
 
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