Thanks a ton! Becky
I had a direct entry midwife tell me that because of an incompetent cervix with #2, which was 7 years ago, that I would not be able to carry to term and may not be a HB candidate. All of this over the phone before she even met me or had details.
I met with 1 CNM and 3 direct entry. Ironically I chose the CNM. She was the most respectful of my wishes.
NO Glucose Testing
NO Goop in the eyes
NO Internal exams
NO Vitamin K shot
I felt that the direct entry midwives were more worried about covering their own a** and less interested in respecting my wishes.
Well, my second midwife was a totally different story. Because she is not licensed (by choice) she is not bound to follow a certain protocol and therefore has a lot of freedom in tailoring her care to her individual clients. She understood the natural process of birth much better than the CNM, who was trained in obstetrical theory. I feel that with the lay midwife I had a *truly* non-interventionist birth. And I felt very comfortable with her ability to diagnose and deal with complications -- she was constantly doing research and always had very detailed and well-documented answers to my questions.
for the record, dd's birth was w/LMs at home and we were not impressed though they were our intuitive choice and I don't regret choosing them. It was just a step in our journey. I would even recommend them ironically....they were good, just not what we ended up wanting.
BTW, I think something I would take into consideration is what kind of births and relationships my midwives had. I believe that my midwives had baggage..well one in particular though both were divorced and kind of man-angry (not that all divorcees are obviously). one midwife had a particularly traumatic tear and a lot of anger at her ex- that was obvious when she spoke to us. In hindsight, I would listen to things like taht more too.
anyway, good luck. follow your heart
The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it. We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.
Don't get me wrong, she was a sweet lady, and the whole experience was good. Much better than the hospital birth I had before... But the next time around, I was looking for a homebirth midwife... I just want someone who I can be certain isn't transferring her fear of negative outcome onto me in prenatals and into my labor... If the baby were in trouble, I would push if it meant a 4th degree tear (my hospital birth came with the standard episiotomy/4th degree tear combo...) But if all is well, trust me, I'm doing all I can to get that baby out as my body leads...
Just my experience... and I would go back to her if I had to choose between hospital and the birthcenter... But I'd rather a repeat of the last two, safe in my home, birthing in my nest...
The Lord bless you,