The End/Beginning is well in sight! - Mothering Forums
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VBAC > The End/Beginning is well in sight!
c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 03:40 PM 01-21-2011

So I've hit my range of due dates yesterday with my last possible due date being a week from today. The due date in my chart is next Wednesday. When people ask when I'm due, I tell them there will be a baby by Valentine's Day. I'm getting really excited!

 

I had sworn that I would refuse all internal exams for the standard reasons (can go from nothing to baby and can walk around with progress for weeks). However, today I decided that refusing the exams was my own way of trying to master/control my mind. I didn't want to know something that might be disappointing. I figured that ignorance was bliss. However, I realized that this logic really came back to bite me in the butt for the birth of my first child. I told them not to tell me how far dilated I was from the get go. That meant that I did not know I arrived at the hospital only at a 2 and should have just gone back home. Instead I stuck it out at the hospital and pushed for something that I really shouldn't have.

 

Anyhow, I just wanted to get a thread where I can get my thoughts off my chest.

 

Currently, I'm feeling pretty upbeat. I don't know the gender and I'm getting really antsy to find out. I'm nervous/anxious about whether I'll be able to manage the intensity of labor. I'm nervous about timing our drive to the hospital since it can take up to an hour, but no less than 40 minutes. My thoughts are all over the place.

 

Oh, and results from the cervical check: 2-3 cm, 60% effaced, 0 station. I'm further along now than I was when I arrived at the hospital "in labor" to give birth to my daughter. It's hard not to be excited about that.



neveraim's Avatar neveraim 06:58 PM 01-21-2011

Yay!!!  thumb.gif


alyrie's Avatar alyrie 02:01 AM 01-22-2011

That's so awesome! 


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 07:10 AM 01-22-2011

thanks, ladies! i'm really glad i decided to let him check me. it was a HUGE boost of confidence for me in my body. after 38 hours of labor, i never got further than a 3-4 with my daughter. so it's nice to know that my body can get to almost that point again effortlessly.


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 12:35 PM 01-24-2011

oh how the mighty has fallen. with my first, i was super pumped about the prospect of laboring and putting my strength, will, and determination to the test. i was all about a drug and intervention free birth. i was determined.

 

with labor soon on the horizon, i'm feeling super humbled. i'm nervous and scared and anxious. i mean, the labor i went through to get to the 4 cm before my c-section were really tough. i can't imagine how the additional 6 cm will feel like. and every time i hear the phrase ring of fire, i feel a little nauseous!


Monkey Keeper's Avatar Monkey Keeper 02:16 PM 01-24-2011

You can do it! blowkiss.gif


neveraim's Avatar neveraim 04:30 PM 01-24-2011

For me...getting past 4 was great...because I knew I was going somewhere...getting closer....and honestly, the labor part doesn't "hurt" any more....pushing sucks though!  sorry but it did for me.  I never felt the "ring of fire" LOL!

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by c'est moi View Post

oh how the mighty has fallen. with my first, i was super pumped about the prospect of laboring and putting my strength, will, and determination to the test. i was all about a drug and intervention free birth. i was determined.

 

with labor soon on the horizon, i'm feeling super humbled. i'm nervous and scared and anxious. i mean, the labor i went through to get to the 4 cm before my c-section were really tough. i can't imagine how the additional 6 cm will feel like. and every time i hear the phrase ring of fire, i feel a little nauseous!




c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 09:19 AM 01-25-2011

i love to hear that it's possible to escape the ring of fire. gives a smidge of hope ;) .

 

lost mucus plug today. oh my!


GOPLawyer's Avatar GOPLawyer 09:51 AM 01-25-2011

WRT the ring of fire...maybe I'm just weird or maybe it's that I fought so hard for it as a VBA2C but...I didn't think it was that bad.  In fact, I thought it was really kinda cool. lol  I will never forget thinking in my head, "oh...wow...that must be the ring of fire...cool!"  Yes, it hurt, but it doesn't last and it's a pretty darn good indicator that you are about to have your baby vaginally which is totally awesome after a c/s. :-)

 

Good luck and ELVs!!!


neveraim's Avatar neveraim 06:33 PM 01-25-2011

LOL!  No ring of fire for me because I had forceps assisted birth...then an episiostomy on the last contraction.  The episiotomy didn't hurt...but pushing that baby out sure did!  I was lucky to have my doc...any one else would have sectioned me for low FHTs...He is wonderfully skilled with forceps and doesn't have to cut an episiotomy to use them...but in the end my babe's heart rate was 54 and dropping fast...it was actually necessary....I was so glad it was over!

 

That probably won't happen to you!  I'd have taken the ring of fire over the forceps any day!!! ROTFLMAO.gif

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by c'est moi View Post

i love to hear that it's possible to escape the ring of fire. gives a smidge of hope ;) .

 

lost mucus plug today. oh my!




neveraim's Avatar neveraim 06:35 PM 01-25-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by c'est moi View Post

 

lost mucus plug today. oh my!



Yay!!!! YOU can do this!!!!  thumb.gif


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 10:40 AM 01-27-2011

3-4 cm and 75% this morning. A slow march towards 10 :)

 

Thanks for all your kind words of encouragement and support! Every little bit counts.

 

Abbey, I read your birth story. So glad you got your VBAC!

 

Now I'm just thumb twiddling. I really want to know how this will all play out!


jenniro's Avatar jenniro 12:04 PM 01-27-2011

YAY!!  Let us know how everything goes.


Monkey Keeper's Avatar Monkey Keeper 12:37 PM 01-27-2011

Yaaay!!  1/3 of the way there :D


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 05:13 PM 01-29-2011

really thought i'd be able to be more patient. i'm "only" 3 days past my due date (a fairly conservative one at that though) and i'm feeling antsy. i went and saw the king's speech this afternoon and was so thrilled because for 2 whole hours i forgot i was pregnant and just lived in the moment.


JFTB1177's Avatar JFTB1177 10:15 AM 01-30-2011

Hey just wanted to send you good thoughts!! I am also "past due" (40+5 today) and waiting anxiously... this part is so hard, isn't it?

 

About the "ring of fire", I never even felt my baby crown or come out (my HBAC baby, 2 years ago)! Now, the contractions were a totally different story- very painful. Pushing for me was a relief and I swear I never even felt myself tear even though I did have 2 small tears!

 

This VBAC will be in a hospital, my doc is "letting" me go to 42 weeks so I am feeling the pressure too!

 

GL and I hope you get your VBAC!!! :) :)


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 11:22 AM 02-01-2011

thanks JFTB! i've been thinking of you!

 

friend of a friend was induced today with an unfavorable cervix and it ended in a c-section. i knew the induction was coming. suspected it could turn out that way and desperately wanted to be proven wrong :( . the other woman and i shared the same due date, so it was quite humbling for me and my impatience.

 

when i really stop to think that i'll be 42 weeks in 8 days and will likely have had the baby by then, it feels silly that i'm being so impatient.

 

now i just need to address my fears that seem to be creeping back in...

  • big baby. dd was 9lbs4oz at 41w6d.
  • posterior baby and tough labor. dd was.
  • posterior baby not pushing on cervix to dilate it.
  • labor not starting on its own.

 

i have an amazing OB. no bait and switch with him. he's the real deal when it comes to VBACs and not just among OBs. i know plenty of midwives that are less VBAC supportive than him. my doula is a rockstar and my husband is AWESOME. i've got an amazing support team.

 

I NEED to keep my head in the game these last few days!


Monkey Keeper's Avatar Monkey Keeper 04:33 PM 02-01-2011

You can do it, mama!!

 

I shared so many of your fears since my c/s was due to a big, badly positioned baby who prevented labor from ever really getting going.  My VBAC baby was 9lb, 5oz at 41+2.  Spontaneous labor started in the wee hours of the morning of 41+1, and even though his head was very poorly applied, my BOW dilated me to 9.5cm!  And he was out in four pushes.

 

"Baby will come when baby is ready."

"My body will not grow a baby too big for me to birth."

 

And crawl around on your hands and knees ;)


simonsez2u's Avatar simonsez2u 05:22 PM 02-01-2011

That is wonderful news so glad to hear that you are on your way and will be holding your little soon!  You can do it and it sounds like you have a wonderful support team.  Good Luck to you and ELV.


CookAMH's Avatar CookAMH 08:12 PM 02-01-2011

You are doing great!!  I can't wait to hear about your fabulous VBAC!!


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 04:44 AM 02-03-2011
Trying to keep my spirits up. On Saturday I was in a really bad spot, but was able to rally. Whatever I did isstarting to wane though and I need a new rallying cry though. I feel like I've paid my dues now and 8 days over is enough patience. I keep trying to remind myself that another 6 days is also normal.

For whatever reason, I'm feeling anxious about the health of the baby. I don't think it's intuition though. Just straight up fear related to other people's birth stories. Kind of like first tri when you worry about miscarriage. Now I find myself worrying over stillbirth. I just want this baby safe in my arms now.

If my dd is well enough, I should have the house to myself today. Hopefully I can pull it together for another several days. Next ob check is tomorrow. That should help. Love going and he's always so reassuring.
jenniro's Avatar jenniro 09:05 AM 02-03-2011

Nice about the OB.  You can totally do this!  This is the homestretch, almost there!


JFTB1177's Avatar JFTB1177 09:14 AM 02-03-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by c'est moi View Post

For whatever reason, I'm feeling anxious about the health of the baby. I don't think it's intuition though. Just straight up fear related to other people's birth stories. Kind of like first tri when you worry about miscarriage. Now I find myself worrying over stillbirth. I just want this baby safe in my arms now.

 

 

I feel exactly the same! I am 41+3 today and even though DS2 came at 42+5 last time I still feel VERY anxious! I find myself reading scary stories and worrying all the time. Here's to hoping we both have these babies SOON! :) HUGS!


jenniro's Avatar jenniro 08:53 AM 02-04-2011

Bump for updates jumpers.gif


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 12:14 PM 02-04-2011

thanks for checking in on me :)

 

still pregnant. oh well.

 

had my OB appt today. i still can't believe how amazing he is. he's just so laid back about everything. when it was time for the GD test in early third tri, he asked me if i wanted to do it rather than told me i would. i've only had to pee in a cup once this entire pregnancy and that was related to my GBS test. i know many women that have delivered at 43 weeks with him. he never considered changing my due date even though my 22-week US was 5 days sooner than another date in my chart. he's not even close to pushing for an induction. he's totally fine waiting it out as long as both mom and baby are healthy. i just can't believe him!

 

anyhow, that means that really it's just a waiting game at this point. the only pressure to get the baby out is from ME and me alone. otherwise, everyone else is happy to wait. my next appt will be at 42w1d. i hope i don't make it that far!


neveraim's Avatar neveraim 03:12 PM 02-04-2011

thumb.gif


LisaSedai's Avatar LisaSedai 05:48 AM 02-07-2011

Sending you good thoughts


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 11:46 AM 02-07-2011

Ladies, you've been great! I had my baby yesterday morning via c-section. A little GIRL!!!! 9 lbs 14 oz. 21 inches long. big ol' head, broad shoulders. huge cheeks. she looks like a sumo wrestler :)

 

I went spontaneously into labor on Friday night 41w2d. Went to the hospital in the wee hours of the morning on Saturday. Labored for 37 hours, including 3 hours of pushing. Now as strange as this may seem considering that it's a VBAC forum, I still feel healed and validated by this birth. I mean this sincerely. Sometimes we can influence and take charge of our birth experiences, but sometimes babies (not doctors, not doulas, and not mothers) decide on the best way to come out. And no, this is not just the justifications of a "failed VBAC" mama (silly term by the way). In my heart of hearts, I don't regret this birth experience.


Monkey Keeper's Avatar Monkey Keeper 12:00 PM 02-07-2011

Congratulations on your (not so) little gal's arrival, c'est moi!  You are right--you did not fail.  You simply followed your babe's chosen path into the world.  Three hours of pushing is no joke! May you recover quickly.  Enjoy those itty bitty baby snuggles! :love


c'est moi's Avatar c'est moi 12:06 PM 02-07-2011


Thanks so much for your support PB. I want to add that despite the fact that this is a hospital birth and I only pushed for 3 hours, I don't want people to think that I was given a cutoff time for pushing, which is not uncommon. They would have let me push for 6 hours or more if I wanted to. It really was just one of those things

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by PinkBunch View Post

Three hours of pushing is no joke! 


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