I haven't formally introduced myself here yet.
I have had 2 c/s. The first was in March 02 and the second was in Feb 05. I tried for a natural hospital birth with cnms the first time, and ended up with a c/s after 2-1/2 days of induced labor (long story, water broke, no labor started for about 20 hours). I tried at the same hospital with the same cnms for a vbac, second time, this time, went into labor on my own (worked hard for that!
), but labor was extremely protracted (got to 9-1/2 cm in about 50 hours, but baby would not drop, again
). Both times, I went for the vast majority of the labor without pain meds (only getting them towards the end, when it seemed there was little else to do to encourage progress). The second time, baby did not drop enough, but did drop more than the first.... ANYHOO...
After #2 was born, I thought that the most important thing for me to do was to process the c/s's and try to re-cast them in my mind as happy, joyous occasions instead of frightening ones. Now, this is not altogether impossible, as my experiences were not terrible. Indeed, the natural labors were awesome, even if long (part of labor #2 was spent in at the Intercontinental Hotel, long story, complete w/ room service and movies and some marital intimacy in the tub
). The c/s themselves were not horrendous, although I am an anesthesia-phobe. For c/s #1 that was the worst part. For c/s #2, the worst part was whe they nicked my bladder - the "repair" to that was quite unpleasant.
: I saw both babies immediately, my dh stayed with #1, my mom stayed with #2 (dh wanted to stay with me while "repair" was done) the whole time, both babies were brought quickly to recovery (where I nursed them, both times). Both times, babies roomed in and nursing went great. My recovery has been fine both times (2 months out, for example, I'm running, doing weights, swimming, etc.) I just want to accept the methods of birth of my 2 ds, so that I don't have to continue to look back in regret and think about what we might have done differently. Part of me feels that if I get pregnant again, I should have a 3rd c/s, and do it with the doctor of my choice and in my way - controlled rather than willy nilly at 12:00 a.m. some morning with whatever doc is around, kwim. But, then I made the mistake of reading some vba2c stories...
Now that I'm thinking about it and being honest with myself, I feel that some of the decisions that I made contributed to my 2 c/s.
: Despite the nagging little voice in my head that knew better, I did not seriously consider homebirthing either time. The reason why neither baby would not come out was, of course, positioning (duh). #1 was asynclinic, and #2 was face up. It was by sheer force alone that I dilated almost the whole way both times. Anyway, looking back, I feel like if I had had a provider that was more attuned to positioning in a more detailed way things might have worked better (yes, the cnms encouraged going drug free and moving, walking, getting into positions, etc., but they did not know about how to detect and correct slight variations in head position - or - if they did know these things, they did not suggest them to me - neither did either doula that I had). I started thinking that if I had had a homebirth midwife (not sure what kind) she would have been more able to help me with this. Heck, even if I didn't want to birth at home, if I wanted to hire here as a monitrice and have her come to the hospital with me, I should have at least done that...
Anyway, I'm babbling - the point is, I want to really think it through - would it be worth it to try vba2c? Would it even be possible? My questions are:
1. has anyone here ever had a vba2c in a similar situation to me (2 c/s for ftp, with very long labors where progress by *real* standards and not merely ob standards, should have happened?
2. does anyone know of any providers in Ohio willing to assist vba2c? I'm wondering if it would even be a possibility for me.
Mamma to ds #1 (3yo)
ds #2 (2 months old)