oh my...my OB has gone crazy! (possible TMI) - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-22-2007, 01:02 PM
 
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Wow, I'm so envious of you Wombat! Although she's an OB she seems more natural and midwifey then some of the midwives I've met.

Good luck and OPEN UP!
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Old 01-22-2007, 05:42 PM
 
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Originally Posted by smalltownmom3 View Post
I saw the title when looking for new posts, it stuck out, so I clicked it. I replied because this is a message board on the internet, so I gave my opinion. A doctor like that would have made me walk out immediately and off to find a normal one. And as I am dating a doctor I do know who the costs can affect their pocket books, but they also have to promise to do no harm and to do what is medically safe before worrying about the warm fuzzy feelings. I would rather have a c/s and be alive than tried a vaginal birth and not be.

eta. I had all vaginal births, just saying that if one of them would have had to be a c/s I would not have attempted my next as not if my doctor was against it.
You didn't listen to a word the pp said. Do the research, then come back. I doubt you will still be saying this. As a starter, maternal death is higher with a csec than vaginal birth.

Mama to my spirited J, and L, my homebirth: baby especially DTaP, MMR (family vax injuries)
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Old 01-22-2007, 06:01 PM
 
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As a starter, maternal death is higher with a csec than vaginal birth.
:

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Originally Posted by smalltownmom3
they also have to promise to do no harm and to do what is medically safe before worrying about the warm fuzzy feelings.
Where was this promise when the interventions my doctor did during my first birth that were NOT necessary caused me to be cut in order to birth my baby?

I'm sorry, I am not saying that your bf is like this but too many women are cut during birth for NO REASON other than convenience or CYA on the doctors part. Do your own research and never take someone's word just because they have MD after their name. The women here are much more informed about the real risk of VBAC than many doctors.
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Old 01-22-2007, 06:13 PM
 
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Your doc is so right about getting into the dirt. It helps you *stop thinking* and get into that relaxed state of mind that benefits you in every area of your life. After one particularly difficult time, I spent a spring digging up an entire 20ft by 3ft flower bed, from nothing - by hand. Not with a shovel, that would have taken a day or two. By hand, with a screwdriver. I touched every handful of dirt that I turned over. By the time I was done, I had a really neat collection of pottery shards, antique bottles, old square nails, and one pair of 1800's style spectacles. It was a relaxing exercise that took me outside of my over-thinking mind and nourished my soul. Dirt meditation!
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Old 01-22-2007, 06:16 PM
 
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Your doc is so right about getting into the dirt. It helps you *stop thinking* and get into that relaxed state of mind that benefits you in every area of your life. After one particularly difficult time, I spent a spring digging up an entire 20ft by 3ft flower bed, from nothing - by hand. Not with a shovel, that would have taken a day or two. By hand, with a screwdriver. I touched every handful of dirt that I turned over. By the time I was done, I had a really neat collection of pottery shards, antique bottles, old square nails, and one pair of 1800's style spectacles. It was a relaxing exercise that took me outside of my over-thinking mind and nourished my soul. Dirt meditation!
Oh my! But that would ruin my manicure!
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Old 01-23-2007, 01:08 AM
 
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So my Rx is to connect to that "juicy, sexual, opening, earth mama giving birth, bringing the baby all the way down and out" energy any way I can and practice "opening" vocally, vaginally, and emotionally.
Ohmigoodness, your thread hit me at the exact right time. I've been thinking that it's totally time to stop thinking so much, about OFP, about my supplements, about my choices. I love my new care provider and have an incredibly experienced doula (a VBAC mama herself). I've been reading "Mind Over Labor" and Ina May again because I aspire to enjoy, not simply endure, the delivery experience. It's truly a cause for celebration and joy!

Next time you see your OB, please let her know how she's inspired others. I cannot count the number of times I've used the phrase "juicy earth mama" since I read your OP.
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Old 01-23-2007, 01:48 AM
 
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OP here!
. . . there is such a huge pressure on VBAC mamas to either "give in" or "fight fight fight" that this can get in the way of a normal, natural, drug and intervention free labor and delivery. VBAC mamas THINK all the time about statistics and odds and ratios and "how is this particular little thing going to affect me, who is going to try to stop me again"...and that this tension/stress/angst can actually prevent you from relaxing, and letting go, and opening up, and just BEING a birthing mother.
I so agree. I try to limit my time here at the vbac forum for that reason. I'm really loving HypnoBirthing right now, wish I had read it before dd was born.

As for playing in the dirt . . . right now all the dirt around here is buried under about 6 in of snow . . .
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Old 01-25-2007, 12:53 PM
 
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So my Rx is to connect to that "juicy, sexual, opening, earth mama giving birth, bringing the baby all the way down and out" energy any way I can and practice "opening" vocally, vaginally, and emotionally.

I told her my husband was going to send her flowers...

But I'm no longer concerned that I picked the "wrong" care giver!
That's great, Clay! And very,very funny! I think she was trying to get you to laugh!

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Old 01-25-2007, 12:55 PM
 
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Originally Posted by velcromom View Post
Your doc is so right about getting into the dirt. It helps you *stop thinking* and get into that relaxed state of mind that benefits you in every area of your life. After one particularly difficult time, I spent a spring digging up an entire 20ft by 3ft flower bed, from nothing - by hand. Not with a shovel, that would have taken a day or two. By hand, with a screwdriver. I touched every handful of dirt that I turned over. By the time I was done, I had a really neat collection of pottery shards, antique bottles, old square nails, and one pair of 1800's style spectacles. It was a relaxing exercise that took me outside of my over-thinking mind and nourished my soul. Dirt meditation!
Wow- that is so interesting and really wonderful, Velcromom! I've had two jobs where I was payed to play in the dirt (archaeology and horticulture)- no wonder I loved the work so much.

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Old 01-25-2007, 05:38 PM
 
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Well they are doctors for a reason, and if they don't think a VBAC is safe then maybe it realy isn't safe.
Yeah - they think that a scarred uterus is soooo dangerous, but it doesn't stop them from leaving those scars in their wake like a flower girl dropping rose petals at a wedding.

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Originally Posted by smalltownmom3 View Post
And as I am dating a doctor I do know who the costs can affect their pocket books, but they also have to promise to do no harm and to do what is medically safe before worrying about the warm fuzzy feelings. I would rather have a c/s and be alive than tried a vaginal birth and not be.

eta. I had all vaginal births, just saying that if one of them would have had to be a c/s I would not have attempted my next as not if my doctor was against it.
I'm truly not trying to be rude...but until you actually have a c/s...until you cry yourself to sleep every night for months...until you yell at your toddler not to hug you, because the pain is too intense...until you wake up screaming from nightmares of blood all over the walls in the OR...until you're 18 months pp, and still trying to accept the fact that you're never going to feel half your abdomen or your bladder again...maybe you shouldn't be so quick to tell the rest of us what you'd do if you were in our shoes.

There only two things I've done in my life that I truly, deeply regret. The first is that I did what my doctor told me to do with dd...I caved on an RCS, because she was breech at 39 weeks. The second is that I had another RCS when my doctor threatened to drop me as a patient at 41w, 4d if I didn't do so.

OP: Your doctor sounds like a gem. I wish there were more like her...

Lisa, lucky mama of Kelly (3/93) ribboncesarean.gif, Emma (5/03) ribboncesarean.gif, Evan (7/05) ribboncesarean.gif, & Jenna (6/09) ribboncesarean.gif
Loving my amazing dh, James & forever missing ribbonpb.gif Aaron Ambrose ribboncesarean.gif (11/07) ribbonpb.gif

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Old 01-25-2007, 05:45 PM
 
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Storm Bride- I'm so sorry that the politics of medicine have hurt so many women like yourself.

-Angela
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Old 01-25-2007, 07:45 PM
 
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I think this doctor sounds awesome...it actually inspired me a bit. My hubby and I will be trying to conceive #3 soon...a VBA2c...I went to my family practice doctor and told him that we were going to try a VBA2C....he told me...he's not an ob...I don't think you will be a good candidate...It upset me and I began second guessing my ability....but I am not going too! I need to think positive thoughts so when the time comes and I am pregnant, I will be ready for this baby!
Hugs
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Old 01-26-2007, 06:36 PM
 
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What an awesome doctor!!

I have to admit...attitudes like the "well, I would be so offended if my doc said that" are what make it really hard to find a doctor that you agree with. I used to work as a CNM, and I had to really get to know a patient and feel them out before I would say anything out of the ordinary. It's such a fine line for a provider between saying what they really think and running all the patients away (and starving). Your doc sounds like she figured out that you were really cool.
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Old 01-27-2007, 02:39 AM
 
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I love her. Please tell her I love her.

Is she leaving OB to become a MW? How cool would THAT be! LOL Mind you maybe we need her more making change from the INSIDE...

xo Robin
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Old 01-28-2007, 04:30 PM
 
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She sounds absolutely amazing! Tell her she is one in a million and to please keep practicing.
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Old 01-28-2007, 10:29 PM
 
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I have found this thread really helpful. I totally agree about thinking too much. I've never been able to spout off statistics like I can now and on the one hand I am proud of the knowledge that I have now (which I so sorely lacked before) on the other, I CAN see how I could get caught up in that and miss the "real" stuff, miss things progressing naturally....maybe even halt my own progress.
So thanks for the heads up
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