I thought it would be nice to see who hangs out here, and where we all are! Maybe, at times, we can be of assistance for each others?
I'm in Wellington, and I'm at home with my 2 1/2 yo DD.
Hi nikkidynamo! Congratulations! I found this community just before I got pregnant, and have been hanging out here ever since. Back then there was no NZ forum for AP-minded parents, and anyway, Mothering rocks!
Hey girls, nice to find you. I am finding as my daughter gets older that I need the support of other like minded mamas to keep me sane. I seem to be weirder and weirder compared to other parents around me and it a very strange experience to feel that the way I parent is normal but not to fit in or feel like I am from another planet when it comes to parenting choices. I am sure it is harder in other countries but I think in NZ no-one likes to stand out to much and most people just do what everyone else is doing and don't question it.
Here is a bit of my backstory.
Have wanted kids and a big family for ages. Got pregnant in 2007 with our first baby but lost it at 17weeks due to partial molar pregnancy. I had chosen not to have any scans and had chosen a very natural midwife. When I conceived again I was very nervous so had lots of scans, had a different and more medical midwife, ended up with a posterior position and my daughter getting stuck so had an emergency c section. I then got severe PND. I had always been AP minded and over the first year or my daughter's life that developed more and more. So I am still bfing, we cosleep and try to parent in a gentle and relationship based way.
I am hoping that when I have another child that I can have a natural birth so I am really interested in HBAC and am keen to really prepare myself before TTC again.
So I guess my identity and ideals are developing as I go.
What are your backstories?
Anything you are really into or passionate about?
Due July 2012
Welcome Alwayshope! So sorry to hear about your loss and the PND.
Where in NZ are you?
Hmm backstory.. well my husband and I just moved here from Australia late last year. We came to NZ for our honeymoon and just loved it so much that we decided to move here. We struggled with trying to conceive for a long time before we fell pregnant.. 26 months of trying, and just about every natural therapy you can think of (naturopaths, chiros, acupuncture, kinesiology, bowen therapy etc) eventually I gave up my idea of falling pregnant naturally and we fell pregnant on our first round of clomid. So now, we are 31 weeks into the pregnancy and preparing for a home/water birth, which is what we had always planned to do, even before we started trying.
I know what you mean about feeling weird, it is a tough thing to deal with sometimes, but that is why forums like this one are particularly wonderful! I feel like that pretty much all the time, I'm a 30 year old dreadlocked, expat, vegan, homebirther so I should be used to feeling weird by now!! I've managed to join up with some other homebirthers in the area through my midwife which is a good start (I'm not great at meeting people - too shy!). I'm not really sure yet though how AP they are and whether or not our parenting philosophies will match up as well as our birthing philosophies, I guess only time will tell!
AislinCarys, is there a NZ AP forum now? I'd love the link!
The reply box is just not behaving so I have to write at the beginning again - the natural parent website in NZ is www.thenaturalparent.co.nz It will eventually be a magazine in print but at the moment is just online and the community is great.
I live in Auckland. Great that you have found some other Mamas through your midwife. I would really recommend La Leche League. They have been awesome support to me and pregnant mamas are definitely welcome. The AP website is www.
Due July 2012
Yep, the reply function certainly isn't working right! I found mothering.com just before I got pregnant, and I knew I wanted to do all these things (that I'd really found in mothering magazine in the year before - homebirthing, homeschooling, waterbirth, AP, extended breastfeeding, natural living etc). I worked as a nanny, so I knew lots of families but they were all quite mainstream. I found a homebirth midwife, and went to her coffee mornings, and went to Birthwise antenatal classes (Birthwise is good, my group unfortunately turned very mainstream right after the babies were born). Through these groups I met some nice people. One of them told me about EC, and invited me to the Potty Group, and that was great, where I really found friends, and support! We didn't end up with a homebirth in the end, but I'm fine with how it went. DD was induced a week early due to reduced fetal water. then everything was wonderful. although DD breastfed the whole time, except for 7 hours at night. Until DD lost weight at 4 1/2 weeks and we started a 6 month long battle against low supply and low weight gain, and for exclusive breastfeeding, supplementing donated milk in SNS, taking fenugreek and Domp., later on. We go there in the end. And we've done EC and BLW, and DD was in arms all the time until she started crawling. And we still breastfeed, and cosleep at night. She hated the wrap sling, and we couldn't afford trying anything else, then a friend lent me her Ergo at 8 months, and DD, who hardly ever slept, went straight to sleep! We used the Ergo for 6 months or so, then i made a mei tai, and we love it. Now there's a babywearing group in wellington, so we're involved there, and we've still got the Potty Babies, and meet people from the Natural Parent Forum, and we also go to the Steiner Playgroup, which is lovely. My advice is to actively try to make up a network of likeminded mamas, it does take some time and effort, but is well worth it. Check out the homebirthers, homeschoolers, any AP groups, see if there is someone in your are a on TNP forum, that you could meet up with. Steiner groups are also likely to have a lot of AP-minded people. Otherwise you could try starting up a group. Advertise AP or Babywearing or EC, put up some posters, and see what comes of it?
Hi there Ladies, I was rather pleased to find the Nz tribe here on mothering. So wonderful to have a place for like minded parents to share and feel at ease about the awesome decisions we make for our families.
I am Dani wife & sahm mumma to 2 beautiful boys Water birthed David who just turned 3 and Lucas 4.5 months my home birthed boy and we live in Auckland.
I have recently been feeling a bit out of place as the way we parent doesnt seem socially accepted, everytime i receive my mothering I am elated at how good it feels to know there are other's out there who "get it"
I hope to get to know you all a bit more soon :)
Hi Dani Congrats on your new boy!
AC - I've noticed you on TNP. I'm MelissaK on there.
I'm Melissa. I have beautiful DD who was born in Feb 2008, and my new little boy, Ben, who was born 8 weeks ago. An HBAC! I'm in Whangaparaoa.
Mama to DD Feb '08 (9lbs), DS Oct '10 (10lbs) , DD Jan '13
It sure is, i only wish i had had the confidence to do it first time around, although logistically it just didn't work for us. I will always treasure Davids birth as it was absolutely perfect including it's location as at the time it was what worked for us. Lucas' birth was incredible and looking back it was so amazing it almost seems surreal ~ completely blissful!
Charlotte's birth is what lead me to who I am today. So not ideal (traumatic in fact) and far from a necessary c-section, but I doubt I'd be as awesome as I am now (and modest!).
I still love to relive Ben's birth every day. We had a SCBU stay afterwards which was pretty rough, but the birth itself was amazing. Im so glad to have experienced it, and would love to birth again and again but probably no more babies for us.
DH and I were watching that show "The Middle" last night, and we always joke how they remind us of ourselves and its like watching our future selves on TV, and I said "yeah and they even have the oops third baby!" and he looked at me in stunned silence. I think he was freaking out that I was pregnant now! lol
Mama to DD Feb '08 (9lbs), DS Oct '10 (10lbs) , DD Jan '13
I am really hoping that I can have a homebirth with the next one. Having had a previous c section means my choices are so reduced and hospital just seems like it would lead to interventions I don't want. I tihnk I am gradually convincing DH and am trying to get myself ready to be pregnant again.
Due July 2012
We later had a difficult breastfeeding journey. DD was always on the breast, and had a great latch, but not until she started losing weight at 4 weeks did anyone realize she didn't feed actively, hardly ever (she'd suck, but not swallow, after a few minutes, and stay like that for hours). By then my supply had plummeted. We got it up, by scheduling, feeding donated milk in SNS, taking Fenugreek, and later Domperidone. By 6 months we were off donor milk, DD was gaining well, and we've never looked back!!!!
DD's not much of a sleeper. She knew she wanted co-sleeping, and to be held always, and not in slings, and preferably never sleep! She's very social and very happy, and I love spending time with her.
I'd known I wanted to AP and natural parenting, but didn't know how much. I really wanted to babywear, which DD didn't at the beginning. I wasn't sure about co-sleeping, but DD certainly was! The one thing that worked really well from the beginning was EC. It was always really easy, and the best thing we ever did. So much a bonding experience, and really helped when things were difficult.
Now we babywear, co-sleep, breastfeed a lot and attempt GD.
I'm passionate about:
- Breastfeeding, and mothers' right to appropriate support to succeed
- Babywearing, and great carriers/slings
- EC - the freedom
- Co-sleeping, the safety of it
Hi from Napier,
I'm Karyn, Mum to a nine year old, an almost six year old and a 17 month old. Kids enrolled at Taikura Rudolf Steiner in Hastings and I'm loving being a Mum. How cool to have an AP group here. Pleased to meet you all.
Hi, I'm in NZ as well
In the Waikato to be more precise.
DH & I have 5 children, ages 16, 14, 11, 9 and 4.
Our children have never been to school. I'm passionate about babywearing (among other things!) and still sad my youngest is coming up 5 and too big to wear, most of the time...
I had homebirths with the youngest 3 and was born at home myself, in 1968 in Holland.
I wasn't very AP when my oldest was born
But I've learned so much over the last 16+ years! My poor oldest DS was such a guinea pig in that sense...
But I can't turn back the clock.
Nice to meet a group of mum's in NZ. I'm Joanna.
Have four children, youngest is one week old. She was born at home as planned, labour was less than an hour long. My first was born in hospital, water labour and lovely. Second born at home and in the water, third was six weeks early and waters broke so he was born at hospital luckily we made it. Labour was also less than an hour. Special care in Tauranga hospital for nine days.
We go to La Leche League to meet other like minded mums but also go to playcentre. Cosleep with all the children till they wanted their own beds. Our DS2 still comes to bed int he morning and he is still breastfeeding most days.
He is finding the adjustment to having a new baby inthe house difficult. Will be taking him to an osteopath on Wednesday. Trying him with chamomile tea, avena comp drops and rescue remedy - probably not often enough.
While I'm here, what is the kiwi perception of chicken pox? would it be rude to ask a fellow playcentre mum for my kids to come and play with her kids who have chicken pox? (asking here and not in the vax forum because I specifically want info on the NZ attitude toward chicken pox, not anything else, thanks Mods) Been here for a year and this is my first knowledge of an incident of the pox, so keen for them to get it if we can, just don't want to be rude/weird (or more so than usual )
well, i suppose i should come in -- better late than never!
we moved to NZ in Feb 2010 and live in wellington. I pretty much hang out with Aislyn once a week at the play group, but now our littles are nearly too big for it. we live on opposite sides of wellington and bus everywhere, so we gotta figure out how our two will get together, since both are pretty sure that they are girlfriend/boyfriend. I think that Aislyn and I should have the papers drawn up now -- determine the dowry and everything. and, hopefully both children will be ok with their MILs. :)
i did discover that it will take us two busses to get the kids together, and probably about an hour of travel time, which means when we do meet at each other's homes, it will have to be pretty much for the whole day. :D
anyway, we just moved into a cottage by the sea (at the opening of the harbor) and DS loves it. well, we all love it, to be honest. :) and we love running our business. we love living in NZ.
i was into all of this AP stuff well before I had DS -- about 5 years before I had him. Had a UP and UC, had a breastfeeding issue (strong tongue -- took a week to get a latch; 6 weeks to get to being nipple shield free; then going strong until January when i took him down to two feeds a day, and now he's down to one -- and that might just last until he's ready to let it go), did EC -- which was awesome! -- and cosleep. Also babywear, but now he's way too big for it, so he walks everywhere. :) He's quite the hiker!
we still cosleep, which some people find really strange. our cottage technically has a second bedroom, but we likely won't use it. we have a second bed (a day bed), but it's in the lounge (which our bedroom opens out to as if it's one big room), so it's not likely that he'll have his "own room" -- but I don't think that matters so much. :D lots of families have a "sleeping room" and what not.
uhm, yeah, that's pretty much me. :)
Hi Im an american Living in Dunedin
I wanted to have a hospital water birth, family history of complications leading to c-sections made me want to play it safe, glad i did. My sons heart beat was not ideal and i did not progress after 5 hours by 7 hours or no progression but actually regression I had a c-section and all was fine. AP parenting just came naturally and then i learned more about it and embraced it. Co-sleeping is kinda a necessity in Dunedin cause its so cold i keep my son with in arms reach (i turned his crib into a side car) so i can warm him up need be.
We just recently moved to NZ from the US and are now living in Kaiwaka, Northland.
We have a very spirited very freedom seeking dd who is almost 8.
Everything is so new here and a little overwhelming, so I am glad there is some consistency in my life -
like visiting Mothering.com.
Cheers to everyone