I agree about the after pains being the worst. I sat in the bath at least 10 times a day. And going # 2 was excrutiating. I felt like my bottom was falling out every time and would cry when I felt like I had to go for a couple weeks. It took about 6 weeks to heal most of the way, but I had pain for like 6 months.
No significant tearing with #2 - but I was in the water until the actual coming out and I also really supported my perineum and let my body push it out which I think was the reason. MUCH less painful and no recovery needed at all.
|I had no idea I'd torn. BUT... I kept hearing how painful "The Ring of Fire" is - so I was expecting a lot of pain there. Actually, my "ring of fire" wasn't all that bad. Yeah, it hurt, but it didn't last long & honestly, I guess I had expected it to be torture - so since I was expecting the worst, it wasn't as bad as I had imagined. Ha - I think the way my mind is, things are just always worse in my head than in reality.|
After reading these stories I guess I really was lucky not to tear! Especially given the nuchal hand thing. What's interesting is that I felt like I was pushing with all my might, but it wasn't voluntary pushing--I mean, I only pushed when my body was making me push--and afterwards, my midwife said that I had 'just breathed the baby out'. At the time I was thinking "Like fun I breathed her out!", but now I can sort of see what she meant. I've since read up on the theory of not consciously pushing, and I think maybe that was partly why I didn't tear. The only time I pushed without feeling that 'pushy' overwhelming sensation was after the birth, when they had to forceps the placenta out. And that was not fun. Do people really push, as it were, deliberately? I can't imagine that. I kept looking forward to resting between pushes, I didn't want more of 'em!
If decomposition persists please see your necromancer.
Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).
The difference was in the recovery.
I only pushed for 26 minutes though before she was born.
Strangely enough I never did feel a ring of fire.
The MW used a local to stitch it up so that wasn't painful at all. I had general soreness on my bottom for a week or so but healing was very quick with no problems. It'll never be "like new" but I was back to mostly normal after 6 weeks or so. After a couple of months the only sign of it is a little white line.
(this time I'm UCing and deliverying in any old position I like - not doing supine against my will again!)
Mom of three - (2.5 yrs, 7yrs, and 11yrs). Birthing Doula, editor, and wife to my soulmate. I've had a c/s, hospital VBAC, UC and not yet decided what I'll do about this next little one
I mean, it wasn't comfy or anything, but it wasn't out of line with the whole birth sensation/labor land experience (I was using hypnobabies). The suturing (around 200 sutures, half hour-45 minutes) however was HORRIBLE. Seriously the single most painful physical experience in my life. The local they used left windows and eventually they had to hook me up to an IV to administer narcotics (and pit since my bleeding was crazy). And the recovery was pretty unpleasant.
But the tear itself? Not something I noticed.
Oh, a random note... my vbac OB (who was very crunchy, trained with Ina May, homebirthed her own babes, etc) said that in her experience it's better to focus on a "positive" than a "negative" during pregnancy. So instead of saying "I would rather tear" (a common birth plan statement when addressing surgical cuts like episiotomies) it's better to say "I want to stretch naturally" or something like that. She isn't really into law of attraction or anything, but it's sort of similar.
both sucked like hell.