I ask because I've always wondered if women specifically notice tearing, or if it just feels like part of the regular pain of pushing. In some birth stories I've read, I got the impression that the women didn't even realise they'd torn until the midwife checked them later. Is that usually the case? With Rowan my MW wasn't sure if I'd torn or not (nuchal hand presentation), and I wasn't sure if I was supposed to know. (I hadn't; I mean, she checked, she didn't just guess! But one of the first things she said after Rowan was born was 'I'm not sure if we managed to save your perineum', which come to think of it wasn't the most tactfully-worded statement on the planet).
Thanks for indulging my impertinence! : When I hear "I had a second-degree tear" it sound horrifically painful, but women bring it up so casually. Then again, women are weird... we can describe the most tortuous childbirths in undramatic, matter-of-fact terms. So one never knows.
Arizona backwards is still Arizona! It's a palomino!
SAHM to Chloe«- 6/2008 (10 lbs, 5 oz), Hannah- 9/2010 (9 lbs, 12 oz), Liam- 2/2013 (9 lbs, 6 oz)
The stitches, however, felt like wire. It was the weirdest thing. I could have sworn that my midwife was sewing me up with a strand of metal. It was like I could feel the "squeak" as the sutures went through.
I had a very minor tear, but I didn't feel anything. I didn't even know I'd torn until my midwife told me. As I was tearing, when DS2 crowned, I could feel my skin stretching beyond its capability, but the actual tearing, I didn't feel. I think it's due to the waterbirth...or maybe because my tailbone broke at the exact same moment, so I was more overwhelmed with the feeling of being whacked in the butt with a cement block than with my piddly little tear.
I didn't feel any pain on the way to the hospital. And I got a local for the stitches so no pain there.
It was close to 24hrs later when I got sensation down there. The stitches never bothered me (cept when sneezing...whoops). It was the 'roids and my poor poor tailbone :
I had smaller tears with subsiquent kids and didn't even notice. It was just part of the general soreness afterwards and healed very quickly.
I didn't think about the tear again until going to the bathroom maybe 30 mins later and tried to pat myself clean/dry and it felt like 2 extra pieces of skin hanging there! Ugh! That's when I realised it was my torn genitals :
It seemed to take forever to stitch up and I was pretty sore for a while after, so definitely the recovery was worse than the event itself.
I only needed 3 stitches inside, my mw left the outer part of the tear alone, so it must not have been too bad. We credit birthing in the water for that!
Sami , wife to , mama to Tate 10/14/05, Kaleb 12/17/07, Bram 3/13/10-11/17/12, Alden 2/1/12, October 2014
Doula mama to dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08) and expecting (Apr '17)
Then with ds#2 I had a very slight tear, 1st degree but other than the ring of fire (he came out in 30 min.s, much faster-was also posterior) I didn't notice and my recovery was phenomenal, so much easier.
With dd she came out in 3 pushes, I had a cyst in my vagina which they said I wouldn't feel (and I didn't) but it would make my pushing sensation much stronger which it DID. I tore again slightly, 1st degree, with her and I felt a ring of fire when she came out and that was a waterbirth but nothing unusual beyond that.
Mom to a bright & energetic 6 y.o. boy With my sweetie for 10 years now Registered nurse
Honestly, I didn't feel them at all. Or, I wasn't aware of them as some distinct seperate event. I was busy with intense contractions, pushing, wanting to get the baby out. Of all the parts of labor I went through, the tearing was so minor that I didn't even notice it when it happened (I *did* notice after the birth )
What was painful for me was the first time I went to the bathroom (#2) after delivery. It stretched my stitches terribly and I remember sitting on the toilet holding DH's hand in tears because it was so painful.
I also develeped what my OB later told me was "skin tags" after my tear started to heal. Some of my skin was bunched up between the stitches and was painful each time DH and I made love (Note...this was like 2 months postpartum) and sometimes when I would use the loo. My OB told me it would eventually fall of on it's own due to friction or he could remove it. I opted to wait it out, because I didn't feel like being numbed down there again and then restitched. It took 6 months before that went away entirely.
Mostly, though, I would just say that (for me) it all hurt so much that there was no way I was going to specifically notice something else painful that was happening. It all hurt a lot.
The second time I was in so much pain that I pushed pretty darn hard and I knew I was probably tearing and I didn't care. I just needed it to be O.V.E.R.!
I had no idea I'd torn. BUT... I kept hearing how painful "The Ring of Fire" is - so I was expecting a lot of pain there. Actually, my "ring of fire" wasn't all that bad. Yeah, it hurt, but it didn't last long & honestly, I guess I had expected it to be torture - so since I was expecting the worst, it wasn't as bad as I had imagined. Ha - I think the way my mind is, things are just always worse in my head than in reality.
Although, as his head was born, I did say, "Fu** Fu** Fu**" repeatedly & real quick.
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