When to have the next one?? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 12-12-2003, 10:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I had my first child at age 28, he was born last January & is about to turn one!

We are so happy to have him around & though his birth didn't go exactly as I planned, I got through it and it wasn't so bad at all.

I was wondering what people think is a good amount of time to wait between children?? I guess what I am asking is how old is too old to conceive & give birth to a second child?

I definitely want to have another one, but I want to plan it this time. Also I need time to get my life sorted out again, home, work etc etc
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#2 of 4 Old 12-13-2003, 01:54 PM
 
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I'm a firm believer in the "you'll just know". I don't think there is any right answer for anyone...it depends on life situations. My dd was NOT planned....I was 22 and single and in college. I'm preg again, this time planned, and I feel it's PERFECT timing...now I'm married, we're sorta settled, and I feel like I got to spend all my dd's baby time with her...she'll be 5 when this one comes. BUT....some people feel like a 5 year difference is too much.....some people like more space.....some moms like to get all their baby caring out of the way at once and some like to spend quality time with their babies one at a time.

I started having the "urge" when my dd was about 2 and felt ready, well, now. I don't really think that having every little thing in your life just perfect is really that important....babies are always going to kind of toss things up a bit.....so being emotionally ready and feeling like your OTHER children are ready, to me, are the most important things.
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#3 of 4 Old 12-13-2003, 02:07 PM
 
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My friend says the optimal time for a woman to wait before conceiving the next child is 16 months (she cites the March of Dimes for that bit of info - can't find a link though.) Apparently, it takes 16 months for your body to recover from giving birth the first time.

10 - boy
5.5 - girl
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#4 of 4 Old 12-17-2003, 03:02 AM
 
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My midwife said I should wait at least 18 months before trying again. She said that's how long the body takes to recover and also that it's hard to deal with two babies both that young (both still in diapers, etc.)

As far as a mother being too old to conceive and give birth, I wouldn't rule out any pre-menopausal age.

-Alice, SAHM to dd (2001) and ds (2004) each of whom was a homebirth.jpg, who each self-weaned at 4.5 years bfolderchild.gif, who both fambedsingle2.gif'd, who were bothcd.gif, and both: novaxnocirc.gif.   Also, gd.gif, and goorganic.jpg!

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