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#1 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 09:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I looked in at the newborn nursery a few times in the last few days when I was up at the hospital for something. I am very bothered by the fact that they wash the baby so heavily and harshly that the baby is all red and scaley in appearance. Today, the baby was rubbed so rash that he was bleeding!

I do not want this done to my baby. Why are they doing this? It seems cruel. Plus, no one is allowed to go with the baby to the nursery and we do not plan to vaccinate so now I am scared that they will vaccinate behind my back.
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#2 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:03 PM
 
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Can't you have your baby room in? I always do that and if they ever take the babe to the nursery then DH and or I go along. We are allowed to follow our child. Also, Neither of our two children have been bathed harshly. Why don't you request to give your babe it's first bath. My brother gave his son his first bath in the hospital.

Married to DH 7 years and have three fantastic kiddos! DS 6, DD 4, and DS 2 ...... lo and behold another is on the way!

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#3 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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They have a 75% csect rate and a policy that the baby is not allowed to stay with the mom and no one is allowed in the nursery except the staff. I have been considering going to a birth center because my last birth was such a nightmare.

Funny..if I wanted an abortion, it would be "my body, my choice." But since I did not abort and I am having a baby, it is suddenly the hospital's body and the hospitals choice.
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#4 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:23 PM
 
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I can't skip this tread. DD born in a hospital via c/s. I convinced my LO was prematurely with lots and lots of vernix. My husband wanted stay with me while DD was in the nursery room. Big mistake, DH still feel guilty about it. A nurse took my daughter, brushed her and scrubbing her very heavily. ,My MIL and my friend were tap the glass, screaming, but the nurse looks like she can't hear them. After that,the nurse left DD in the metallic crib uncovered. DD was there crying alone while MIL and friend were crying in the another side of the window.
If I have to have another baby in a hospital, no matter what I don't allow anyone separate us and ask to my husband to washer her.

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#5 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:27 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Lisa1970 View Post
They have a 75% csect rate and a policy that the baby is not allowed to stay with the mom and no one is allowed in the nursery except the staff. I have been considering going to a birth center because my last birth was such a nightmare.



Go to the birth center!
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#6 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:28 PM
 
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They have a 75% csect rate and a policy that the baby is not allowed to stay with the mom and no one is allowed in the nursery except the staff. I have been considering going to a birth center because my last birth was such a nightmare.

Funny..if I wanted an abortion, it would be "my body, my choice." But since I did not abort and I am having a baby, it is suddenly the hospital's body and the hospitals choice.
This is sad, really sad. This is why my DS born at home. You can't imagine how different experience was.

If you can, go to the birth center.

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#7 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:31 PM
 
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Don't consider anymore!!! Go to the birth center!! I think what you've described, esp. not being allowed to be WITH your child would have clinched it for me.

HSMom- 3 beautiful boys that keep me on my toes ; wife to 1 wonderful man (who also keeps me on my toes) ; cat Mom; dog Mom; raising chickens, rabbits & doing whatever God leads me to do
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#8 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:37 PM
 
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i personally would give birth somewhere else if you aren't comfortable with the hospital's environment or policies. i've had my babies in two different hospitals: the first was a higher level hospital that did have a nursery (they handled more complex-care births). ds was in the nursery after birth for maybe an hour since his birth was a bit on the disasterous end, but they were completely cool with my husband hanging out in there. after discharge from the nursery it was completely babies rooming in with their moms to promote better breastfeeding. they encouraged us to do the first bath since it was our first baby.

the second hospital, where i am returning to with this baby, doesn't even have a nursery. it is completely room-in. they gave us the option whether or not we wanted to do the first bath, we were completely welcome to come along and watch or not.

i wouldn't be comfortable with policies that allowed staff to take my newborn away from me and not let a parent accompany them.

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#9 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:47 PM
 
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Lisa - I haven't ever been put in a position like you but if I were, I would definately do everything that I could to birth elsewhere. You and your baby deserve it! No child deserves to be treated that way and the parents should have every right in the world to follow their newborn child.

Married to DH 7 years and have three fantastic kiddos! DS 6, DD 4, and DS 2 ...... lo and behold another is on the way!

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#10 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:51 PM
 
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you can decline the bath. that being said, i would really try to have my baby at the birth center knowing that the hospital has such a high c/s rate, and the staff only rule in the nursery. that rule alone is enough to make me run the other way. a policy like that can lead to other undesireable procedures" eye ointment, vitamin k, hep b.... even if you refuse them.
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#11 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:52 PM
 
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I keep coming back staring at this thread. I honestly didn't get why there was so much fear of and hostility towards hospital births at MDC, until now. Now I get it.
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#12 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 10:59 PM
 
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I watched my cousins preterm (36 wks) baby through the glass for 2 hours laying there by herself naked in a warmer. They came over and gave her a scrub which made her skin angry and red. I was totally heartbroken for her being separated from mommy for the first 2 hours of life. It stinks.

I feel lucky that my baby was handled and washed very gently right next to me in recovery after my (emergency) c/s.

Can you insist that your husband stay with the baby? It does seem like a cruel policy that no one can be in the nursery.

mama to L (4) and G (1.5)
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#13 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 11:02 PM
 
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When I read the first post, I was going to suggest that you decline the bath.
Then I read this...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa1970 View Post
They have a 75% csect rate and a policy that the baby is not allowed to stay with the mom and no one is allowed in the nursery except the staff. I have been considering going to a birth center because my last birth was such a nightmare.
And I revise my answer to RUN as fast as you can in the opposite direction of this hospital, and into the care of a homebirth midwife or the birth center.

Seriously.
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#14 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 11:37 PM
 
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What country are you in?
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#15 of 52 Old 03-03-2009, 11:47 PM
 
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Moved to Birth and Beyond.

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#16 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 12:49 AM
 
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They have a 75% csect rate and a policy that the baby is not allowed to stay with the mom and no one is allowed in the nursery except the staff. I have been considering going to a birth center because my last birth was such a nightmare.

Funny..if I wanted an abortion, it would be "my body, my choice." But since I did not abort and I am having a baby, it is suddenly the hospital's body and the hospitals choice.
Is that even legal? How can they take away your baby against your wishes? I would definitely do everything in my power to find somewhere else to birth if I were you.

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#17 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 01:23 AM
 
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if it was me i would definately use the birth center. last pregnancy i switched care providers at 28 weeks so its do-able evn in late pregnancy. are there other hospitals in the area too or is it strictly a choice btw this hospital and the birth center?
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#18 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 02:07 AM
 
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When I was pregnant with our oldest, our Bradley instructor was talking about insisting that mom and/or dad be with the baby at all times. She gave a really good analogy that I still remember: imagine your 5 yo needs to be seen by a ped. You get to the office and are met in the waiting room by nurses who insist that they will take your child back into the exam room without you. They know best, and they'll bring him back when they're finished with him. Would you stand for this? Of course not. Just because your newborn is only hours or days old doesn't change the fact that YOU are his/her parent. No one can take your child without your consent.

RUN far away from that hospital!
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#19 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 03:02 AM
 
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hospitals can take your baby against your wishes b/c once they are born, the baby is the hospita'ls "patient", and they are obligated to do what they feel is in the best interest of their "patient". apparently, being the hospital's "patient" trumps being the baby's parents, and that's proven with the scare tactics many hospitals use to talk parents out of refusing the standard newborn procedures. not all hospitals are like this, but i'd say most are.
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#20 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 03:12 AM
 
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That hospital sounds like a NIGHTMARE! If you can't go to a birth center, is there at least a different hospital you can go to??

I remember after I gave birth all the new moms were called to the nursery for a lesson on how to bathe a newborn. The nurse took a "volunteer," stripped him down and said, "He's going to scream, that's normal." Then she talked over his screaming for minutes before she finaly bathed him. Even a few minutes is a very long time to be shrieking, naked and alone, for anyone, especially a tiny baby. It was so sad. The parents looked uncomfortable, but, of course, it's so common for people to think it's okay to let a baby scream and scream. I will NEVER go to that hospital for ANYTHING again. Who knows what they did to my LO when they took her to the nursery. I still feel guilty for not being with her every minute. But I was confined to bed for the first day PP.

Brianna, mom to my always naked and singing Faye (9/07) and my chubby baby Bronwen (10/10).
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#21 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 06:59 AM
 
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Gosh that sounds awful! I had an emergency csect 3 weeks ago and my bub was gently wiped and passed straight onto my chest for skin to skin. We didn't get separated at all. Bub stayed with me in recovery and then went with me and roomed in. Bub eventually had his first bath on day 2 by my partner and myself.

I understand the fear now about hospitals in the USA.

(I am in Australia).
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#22 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 09:49 AM
 
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I've waited until we got home to bathe my babies. The nurses don't like it but I keep putting it off until we leave. One great advantage to this is that the nurses have to wear gloves when handling the baby because they are still "contaminated" if they haven't been bathed. I'm a real germ freak and this adds a small layer of protection. Not that the nurses touched my baby very much but when they did they had on gloves.
Also our babies are always accompanied by my husband or myself anytime they leave the hospital room. ALWAYS - no exceptions! We're very polite but firm about it.
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#23 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 10:19 AM
 
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I have hospital births, and I would RUN from that hospital. I would drive however long I had to in order to use a different hospital if I couldn't get into the birth center. A 75% c-section rate is ridiculous, and keeping a newborn away from its mama is cruel.

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#24 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 11:37 AM
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Originally Posted by adoremybabe View Post
Lisa - I haven't ever been put in a position like you but if I were, I would definately do everything that I could to birth elsewhere. You and your baby deserve it! No child deserves to be treated that way and the parents should have every right in the world to follow their newborn child.
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you can decline the bath. that being said, i would really try to have my baby at the birth center knowing that the hospital has such a high c/s rate, and the staff only rule in the nursery. that rule alone is enough to make me run the other way. a policy like that can lead to other undesireable procedures" eye ointment, vitamin k, hep b.... even if you refuse them.
Lisa...you know what is best for you and your baby. You are an informed mama, and you are your babies biggest advocate. And a post partum Mama should be supported and nurtured, not forced to be away from her baby and/or fighting the system.

I have had hospital births ( in Australia) and homebirth in the US. I chose HB here because I was stunned at what was considered standard practice in local hospitals.

Babies should not have to be without their parents. EVER. But certainly not in those first precious hours. I bathed my first 3 children myself on day 3. The hospital did not encourage baths until baby was able to regulate their post bath temp without needing a warmer. So they simply wiped down baby with a towel as she/he lay on my chest. My 3rd child needed a little help getting started and he was taken care of on my chest. If it had gotten any more serious they would have just taken him to the resus. cart which was set up right in the room.

If there is any chance you can switch providers and give birth in a more baby friendly hospital/ birth center/ home environment I would definitely switch. It is not too late.

I hope you and your baby get the birthing journey you both deserve.

wbg...constantly amazed by Z , cherishing I , inspired by P , adoring K and still getting butterflies when I wake up with B !
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#25 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 11:56 AM
 
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Horrible. Why would you consider giving birth there knowing all you do? (I'm not judging, I'm just curious)

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#26 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 12:55 PM
 
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To echo other posters, NO WAY would I give birth there. I'd rather UC.

Incidentally, NOT rooming-in is very damaging to the BFing relationship. I believe it was Dr. Sears "the Baby Book" that best described the mess it creates.

As for the bath, in my baby-friendly hospital, they did it right in the room next to my bed. Nurse was very gentle & DS didn't cry at all! DH filmed it. I had wanted to help, but my legs were too weak to stand from lack of food (my own fault from having no appetite while in labor! Not due to any hospital deprivation.) So I sat in bed watching. The basinette was RIGHT next to my bed.

They encourage rooming in and only took DS out of the room ONCE to weigh him at midnight. All other checks were done right there (& I was stuck in that hospital 48 hours!) They encourage parents to accompany babies to the nursery.

I like the analogy about a 5 year old. You would NEVER let nurses take a young child off without you at a doc's office, so why permit it for a newborn??? no way!
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#27 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 01:13 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Lisa1970 View Post
They have a 75% csect rate and a policy that the baby is not allowed to stay with the mom and no one is allowed in the nursery except the staff. I have been considering going to a birth center because my last birth was such a nightmare.

Funny..if I wanted an abortion, it would be "my body, my choice." But since I did not abort and I am having a baby, it is suddenly the hospital's body and the hospitals choice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by liss_420 View Post
hospitals can take your baby against your wishes b/c once they are born, the baby is the hospita'ls "patient", and they are obligated to do what they feel is in the best interest of their "patient". apparently, being the hospital's "patient" trumps being the baby's parents, and that's proven with the scare tactics many hospitals use to talk parents out of refusing the standard newborn procedures. not all hospitals are like this, but i'd say most are.

Not all hospitals are like this... not at ALL.

I'm actually stunned that there ARE hospitals like this anymore.

I'm doing a hospital birth with an OB, but I picked a hospital that allowed 24-hour rooming in (as well as supporting natural birth), encourages the father to stay with the baby during nursery procedures, strongly encourages breastfeeding and has an in-house lactation consultant, etc.

It is your choice, but I would be scared of other things that could happen in the hospital you describe. I would definitely look up other hospitals and/or birth centers.

Kelly (28), in love with husband Jason (38) and our awesome babies:  Emma 4/09, and Ozzy 8/10

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#28 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 01:14 PM
 
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I've waited until we got home to bathe my babies. The nurses don't like it but I keep putting it off until we leave. One great advantage to this is that the nurses have to wear gloves when handling the baby because they are still "contaminated" if they haven't been bathed. I'm a real germ freak and this adds a small layer of protection. Not that the nurses touched my baby very much but when they did they had on gloves.
Also our babies are always accompanied by my husband or myself anytime they leave the hospital room. ALWAYS - no exceptions! We're very polite but firm about it.
This is what I did also - for my second birth, after I learned the hard way about hospitals and baby separation. The hospital I used for birth #1 claimed to "allow" rooming-in policies and to "allow" you to accompany baby etc. but the reality was very different. The nurses made it clear that you were inconveniencing them any time baby wasn't in the nursery or any time you asked for anything aside from their preferred routine of mother-baby care. It was very hard to fight when I was unsure of myself as a new mom.

The nice thing I guess is that your hospital isn't pretending to be something its not - so you have time and opportunity to run BEFORE your baby is abused by separation and rough treatment. Run, run, run. Truly, I'm horrified by what you describe. Not allowing parents into the nursery room is a really bad sign - what exactly are they afraid of?
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#29 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 01:29 PM
 
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i am reading this thread amazed that this is allowed!!!

i live in england and our health care is free but i seem to have more say about what happens than you do and you have to pay for the priveledge, i really cant believe it!

my boobs are eeeevil.................eeevil i tells ya....
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#30 of 52 Old 03-04-2009, 02:59 PM
 
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Why does baby need a bath? Isn't the vernix supposed to be good for them? This is my third and I have no memory of when I finally got around to bathing them. Please remind me because I think we will be having this baby at a hospital. Do they "look" dirty? I didn't remember that?
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