Cesarean support circle V (December 12) - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-28-2004, 10:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well IOF, I have been following your pregnancy for nine months. I am so excited for this dream of yours to come true. I am so glad that you have shared your ups and downs and intimate thoughts about haveing a VBAC vs having a csection. I believe that you have made a decision based on knowledge and that you have gone with your instincts. I hope that no one, NO ONE, ever tells you that you failed or that you should have played the waiting game, etc. You are a testimony to the rest of us who have to make these very same decisions with your honesty and forthcoming emotions.

I look forward to hearing your birth story and revealing of that baby's private parts! I believe we have armed you with everything you need tomorrow, just take my good wishes and prayers!

Enjoy your baby moon!!!

Love, Kim
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Old 01-28-2004, 10:59 PM
 
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Iof, I've been thinking about you all day, and I'll be thinking about you tomorrow. I'm so glad that everything will be resolved tomorrow, and I'm looking forward to hearing all about it, too!

The only thing I can think of is the stuff which helped me in the hospital after my C... Tucks (I had bad rhoids), a good nursing pillow, and Clif bars (they got my system ah, moving again).
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Old 01-29-2004, 12:43 AM
 
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IOF- I am so excited for you I too, think that you have made your decision well,and you have to be proud that you are following what you feel is right for you and babe

I will be praying for you tomorrow

My advice was about getting the "system going" again too, I gave it on our birth thread

Can't wait to hear your story.

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 01-29-2004, 02:17 AM
 
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Thanks gals!! I'm so excited! I can't wait to tell you all about it!

Ds is home with someone else I hope he is doing ok.

I used hot apple juice with my ds...I'm going to try the same tomorrow. But if it doesn't work I have some more ideas!!!

Thank you for all of your support...I've really needed it!!

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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Old 01-29-2004, 07:24 PM
 
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What a great forum! I have not seen support like this anywhere else I have had 2 c/b, the first with DS I was 42+ weeks, induced, dialated to 10 and pushed for 3 hours with a midwife, she called the Doc in, seems DS was looking to the right (ain't gonna squeeze outta there like that!) My labor with him was short (went in at 7 was fully dialated at 1:30) tried every position known to man during the pushing, he was just a stubborn boy (still is) who didn't want to cooperate with everyone else. He was 8lbs 13 oz, way bigger than the midwife thought he'd be :LOL So when I was preggers with DD the new doc gave me a 30% VBAC due to medical history and the size difference between me and DH. Thought about VBAC, but I've never been upset about DS birth, so I scheduled the c/b with the precursor that I would try VBC if she came earlier (c/b was scheduled at 38 1/2 weeks) Well she didn't show her pretty face until the doc went in to get her, she was a peanut compared to big bro (6lbs 7 oz) and she swallowed fluid so she was in special care nursery for 2 1/2 days. That is my only complaint becasue it felt I was in the hosipital for surgery since DD was not in the room with us. Do I feel like I missed out on not having a vaginal birth? Nope, going through pit hell wit only one shot of Nubane let me taste labor and pushing with out the ring of fire :LOL

Hope to poke around here more
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Old 01-30-2004, 10:21 AM
 
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My C-Birth Story

Analisa, Mama to Meg 12/12/01, Patrick 12/24/03, Catherine 12/24/03, Ben 2/26/06
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Old 01-31-2004, 01:21 AM
 
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IOF....sorry I missed wishing you luck before the event! I hope all went well and I can't wait to hear back from you.
I too want to thank you for feeling comfortable to post all your inner feelings with us! I hope being able to come here helped you through all your ups and downs.
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Old 01-31-2004, 03:41 PM
 
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Well girls....

Bryce Jeremy made his appearance on January 29th at 8:25am!!!!! He weighed in at 8lbs 7.6oz and 20 inches long. He is a little chunk. He looks almost exactly like his big brother as a newborn!

We are still in the hospital but we have wireless internet through the digital cable!

Bryce spent about 30 hours in the special care nursery. They did a chest xray because of rapid breathing and he retained fluid on his lungs. Luckily we had about 2 hours with him before anyhing started. He latched on and nursed like a champ. But he has been on IV fluids since thursday morning so he hasn't nursed very much. The iv should be out in a couple hours so we'll see how his eating changes.

My c/b went spectacular! I am so glad we went this way. My ob was great. They READ my birth plan and all knew it when I got here! We did NOT have eye ointment even! The nurses here are wonderful and so sweet. I coudn't have asked for a better experience!

I'll write more later when I have some more time.

Later ladies!!!

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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Old 02-01-2004, 12:41 AM
 
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YIPEEEEEEEEE!
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Old 02-01-2004, 01:19 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am so glad your csection went so well!!! I hope your baby gets back to the boobie milk soon. Sometimes those boys give us a little trouble in the beginning, mine did. I wil be thinking of you. Kim
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Old 02-02-2004, 01:38 AM
 
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Congrats, Megan!
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Old 02-02-2004, 01:45 AM
 
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I'm hoping you ladies can offer some insight ... I had my c/b 12 weeks ago. In the last week or so I've been having intermitent pain and stretching sensations along my incision. Not enough for me to take anything, but noticable enough to make me catch my breath. There doesn't seem to be any pattern to it either. Is this a normal part of the healing process or should I be concerned?

TIA!
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Old 02-02-2004, 04:14 AM
 
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Woo hoo, Bryce! Congrats to Megan! Hope you're all home soon!

Henry's_Mamma... To be honest, I don't remember very well, but I can say I remember that there were lots of weird sensations down there for a long time (like numb areas, tenderness, funky muscles). I think ~ a yr later, everything felt more or less normal. But I'd definitely ask your ob or midwife about it, to make sure it's not something to be worried about.
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Old 02-02-2004, 03:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by Henry's_Mamma
I'm hoping you ladies can offer some insight ... I had my c/b 12 weeks ago. In the last week or so I've been having intermitent pain and stretching sensations along my incision. Not enough for me to take anything, but noticable enough to make me catch my breath. There doesn't seem to be any pattern to it either. Is this a normal part of the healing process or should I be concerned?

TIA!
It was normal for me. Its just the nerves and stuff coming back "on". As long as it doesnt feel hot or oozing, just take it easy. I still sometimes get these weird sensations in my scar.

Kim
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Old 02-06-2004, 12:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am just bumping this up. Where is everyone? WE need to keep our thread active gals!

I am really getting baby fever. I am trying to see if it passes.
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Old 02-06-2004, 12:38 PM
 
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OK, without saying anything that will get me in trouble - I just love it :LOL when people online (or IRL without an exam) tell other people that their c-sections were not necessary- esp. if the person giving this "advice" is a medical professional. When I was first told that I couldn't have a baby vaginally, I called around to get second opinons, luckily all the OBs and midwives I spoke with said they could not comment without an exam, and that, although rare- there are women whose pelvises cannot birth a baby.

It is so interesting to me the number of people who have tried to tell me that my OB who delivered Sean 2 weeks ago today- is exaggerating about how damaged my uterus was, and how she is probably wrong in saying that labor would've ruptured me for sure. I find it so baffaling that people think they know more about my insides than the woman who cut me open. What would my OB possibly have to gain by lying to me about this? She knows I wanted more children, she is pushing for a vasectomy for my dh (instead of tubal for me, so it's not like she'll make any money from it).

Is it just impossible for OBs to know of what they speak, to truly be looking out for the best for their patients? Is someone only looking out for your best interests if they tell you what you want to hear, if they tell you all is good, and go forth *naturally*? Is natural always best? I think not.
END OF RANT!

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 02-06-2004, 03:11 PM
 
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jess---You crack me up! I can understand your frustration. I don't have the "luxury" of having such an excuse for my c/bs. not that I feel like I need an excuse. I cannot believe how NOT disappointed I feel in not attempting vbac. I guess it wasn't all the important to me!

btw...I asked my ob about my old incision and such while she was in there and she said everything looked great!!

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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Old 02-06-2004, 03:21 PM
 
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IOF-

None of us need excuses! As for your situation, just b/c you don't have a name for why you needed a c-section- I believe your body and baby said you did, and you listened, and most importantly it is great that you are at peace with it

Also- that's wonderful news that your OB says all is healthy

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 02-06-2004, 03:25 PM
 
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Even my priest had an opinion on it. He said, "well, that is one Dr.s opinon" (about me not being able to have more children safely), and I'm thinking, "well, since she(my OB) and the surgeon that assisted her were the only one's who saw the rupture start, and saw the scarring, etc... I can't really get a second opinion, YK?

I guess I feel that the "Doctors are all idiots who want to get to their next golf game, and don't care about you" attitude is annoying me as of late. I think if you choose carefully (kind of like choosing a husband:LOL ), you can find someone who will care about your health and the health of your baby, and you CAN trust them, without being an ignorant dupped woman.

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 02-06-2004, 03:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Jess,

I am right there on the couch with you. I am frankly getting sick of the conspiracy theories and the thought that every medical physician is out to get us, of course backed by drug companies and the like.
It is shocking to me the women who will actually dismiss serious risk to attempt vaginal deliveries as well. I think I read from someone today saying something to a woman who had a csection for a nearly 11lb baby that she probably could have done it. : What ticks me off is that, I know people who have big babies (my mother had me and I was 9 and a half lbs). My MIL had huge babies, her first being well over a 11 and closer to 12. She was also ripped to shreds pushing him out with a midwife and a doctor present (she lived in rural AL) This baby also died. Due to complications from his birth. She was also 43 weeks pregnant according to the midwife. Had she been csectioned there is no doubt he would have lived. Her next three children lived, all whoppers too! All vaginal births. The last baby died attempting a vaginal birth after she had two people recommend a csection to her. When her water broke they had prolapse cord and by the time she was csectioned the baby died. She was unable to have children after that due to uterine prolapse and bladder problems. I will say that my husbands family was much more supportive of my ideals about childbirth than my own family. Both my husbands grandmothers homebirthed all their children, including breech babies, twins, and one weighing close to 12 lbs at birth. All of them breastfed too. Both grandmas had unassisted births, births with midwives, and births with doctors. One grandma attended lots of births with a midwife and even though she thinks having babies at home are great, she will tell you she say she saw a good number of babies die, women die, women bleeding so bad from tears it took them weeks to recover, and women who got infections.

My point to all this is that I am not advocating csections, I am advocating common sense. I was one of those women who was willing to sacrifice almost anything to have a natural vaginal delivery. It almost cost me my baby that first go around. I am meeting more and more women who are willing to take far unnecessary chances to achieve these dream births at the cost of their children and their reproductive organs. It is insane. There seems to be no middle ground for some on the heavy crunchy side of life.

{{{Jess}}} I dont know if it makes a damn but I believe you and I believe your doctor. You dont seem like a peon being lead by the masses. I believe you have made wise choices for you and your family.

Take care,
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Old 02-06-2004, 03:57 PM
 
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Thanks OTF- I know the women on this thread are all so supportive, and I am at peace finally with all my c-births. I just wish more people could see that natural isn't always best, and stop thinking that they know more than every medical professional out there. It's like most of the people know that there are exceptions, they just refuse to ever believe in one when they hear about it: : :

So sad that people don't think there are any caring Doctors out there, we have a great OB and a great pediatrician, I believe in them, and they did go to med school, which is something more than all the internet searching I can do- I chose them carefully- and I believe in them- and get this- they beleive in me and my kids

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 02-06-2004, 04:50 PM
 
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so blind
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Old 02-06-2004, 04:59 PM
 
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Hi Monkey! Glad you found us

Question for everyone- I thought we were getting a sub-forum, is that still happening?

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 02-06-2004, 05:23 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by OnTheFence
Jess,

I think I read from someone today saying something to a woman who had a csection for a nearly 11lb baby that she probably could have done it. : What ticks me off is that, I know people who have big babies (my mother had me and I was 9 and a half lbs).
Jess, with all respect, if a woman isn't even given a choice or an opportunity to attempt a vaginal birth, then how can this be a positive thing all the time?

I will step out of your support thread, but I wanted to point out that YES, I am GRATEFUL for cesarean births. However, when women are told that there is no other way without any other options, then that's a hard thing to swallow. Someone can be at peace with their cesarean, but still, education is important. I cringe at the thought of women believing that they are somehow broken or damaged when it comes to birthing babies vaginally.

And, yes, I have clients who have cesareans. It's always amazing that we have this option - surely it is great for those that need it.

I urge you to look into why this sort of discussion makes you so angry at all of us who point anything like this out. It's like we're supposed to just let women walk around with this badge of how they failed to do something - you can offer support and gentle information without it being an attack on someone's birth experience. That is what I was hoping to do with that post. I hope that you can see that my intention was purely from an empathetic place and not judgemental.
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Old 02-06-2004, 05:33 PM
 
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Um, not sure what your question is as the quote you started with was not from me, it was in conversation to me. I had previously vented about people with no knowledge of *MY* insides feeling that they know more than my OB, is that what bothered you?

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Old 02-06-2004, 05:40 PM
 
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FTR- I think the vent of the day here is mainly about strangers assuming they know more about our bodies than our OBs (and we as women)do.

I am not walking around thinking of myself as a failure- I am quite proud that I listened to my own body(which believe it or not- God did not make to birth babies vaginally- just as He makes people with all manner of "imperfections"- is there no one born without limbs? Is there no one born blind?), and chose an OB that I know I can trust My c-births brought me 3 healthy babies, and I am here to raise them, which wouldn't be the case had I tried to birth vaginally.

But alas, I won't go on about this in our support thread

:Patty :fireman Catholic, intactalactivist, co-sleeping, GDing, HSing, no-vax Mama to .........................:..........hale:
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Old 02-06-2004, 06:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally posted by pamamidwife
I will step out of your support thread, but I wanted to point out that YES, I am GRATEFUL for cesarean births. However, when women are told that there is no other way without any other options, then that's a hard thing to swallow. Someone can be at peace with their cesarean, but still, education is important. I cringe at the thought of women believing that they are somehow broken or damaged when it comes to birthing babies vaginally.

Some us are broken and damaged. You seem to think this doesnt occur by this statement above. Last I checked there was only two ways to have a child biologically (minus gestational surrogacy) and that is vaginal or csection.
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Old 02-06-2004, 10:32 PM
 
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Maybe I'm being an overly sensitive pg woman, but it seems like there has been more traffic recently on the Cesarean Support Circle thread from others wanting to be "helpful" who clearly have not had cesareans who are trying to "educate" those of us on the thread about the negative aspects of cesarean births.

I think those of us participating in the thread are here because we're looking for a safe place to discuss our births--a place where we won't be judged or admonished. (Ahem--isn't this why we asked for our own subforum?) I think it's fair to say that posts which aim to "educate" are not especially welcome or helpful, despite the intentions of the posters. We have had first-hand experience with cesareans, and most of us are pretty well-versed in all the ins and outs of cesarean birth.

I'm hoping that "uncut" posters will keep this in mind if and when they choose to post. It may also be better for them to just post elsewhere in "Birth and Beyond."

Thank you!

FYI, I'm also e-mailing this to the moderator.
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Old 02-06-2004, 11:19 PM
 
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Yes, you are all right. Jess, I was responding to OnTheFence, which was erroneous to mention your name. I apologize.

Perhaps we can start a whole 'nother discussion on how we might educate women in birth without seeming to offend nearly everyone who has had a surgical birth. I think that would be highly enlightening for me - and for many others who have had cesaerans.

I understand about needing a safe space to vent - and I am sorry that I created a risk by posting here for those that are angry with people like myself in general on these boards.

I'm interested to hear what a moderator might add to this issue, but I am aware and respectful enough to just hear what you're saying without the threat of moderator action. I hope that the women here are able to open their hearts and their minds and hear this.
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Old 02-07-2004, 12:10 AM
 
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Well, here I am the moderator! First, it is important to know the role of the moderator. Foremost, it is my job/duty to make sure all are keeping in line with the rules and regulations that are agreed upon in the user agreement. It is my job to step in when these rules are violated. I see no rules violated here thusfar. Now on the other hand, it is difficult for a moderator that has personal feelings about an issue to intervene. That is when a moderator chooses to stay out of the discussion and just stay back and make sure all rules are followeed. But when something is called to my attention, I must make a decision (as a mod and a member) what is best. Since this is a support thread, it should remain as such.....for members that have been through a c/s and want to "hold your hand". Or for those that have not had a c/s, but wish to offer support. I don't think anyone involved in this thread had any malicious intentions and it's important to know that. I appreciate the fact that some of you are wishing to be helpful and offer other alternatives. But since this a support thread, we need to leave it as that. The Birth and Beyond forum is the place to discuss such issues (i.e. reason for c/s, growing rates of c/s, alternatives to c/s etc.) so lets's start new threads instead of interjecting them into this thread. (thx for those of you who have done that aleady). Let's remember we are all "in this together" and that there is no wrong way to birth a baby.......
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