"Birth Day" makes me mad! - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 11:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Does anyone watch this show on Discovery Health Channel? First of all, the female narrator has THE most condescending voice, and she repeats the same things over and over. I sat here Saturday morning drinking my coffee and flipping channels and came across an episode where a woman was "allowed" to give birth to twins vaginally.

They broke her water, and she progressed very quickly. They had to rush her into the OR so she could push. The doctor was saying to some nurses, "We need to get her in there quick in case we've got to knock her out."

So, this poor woman is entirely unmedicated and is transferred to an operating table flat on her back with her legs in stirrups. She's obviously in a lot of pain, and was moaning and screaming. The nurse got right down in her face and said, "LOOK AT ME. CLOSE YOUR MOUTH, HOLD YOUR BREATH, AND PUSH! NO NOISES! NO SCREAMING!" Of course, the doctor gave her an episiotomy (both babies head down, the larger weighed 6 lbs) without her consent (that we saw, anyway). I felt so bad for her!

Meanwhile, the narrator kept repeating "Both X and Y are carrying an excessive amount of amniotic fluid..."

Anyone else get annoyed by this show?
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#2 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 11:47 AM
 
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Me! Birth Day, Maternity Ward and A Baby Story are all horrible shows and unfortunately, this is what "normal" birth is like in this country now. It's so sad. It reminds me of the conveyor belt with the cows awaiting slaughter. Just stand in line, wait your turn, you don't have a voice.
It sucks.
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#3 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 01:34 PM
 
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I'm a doula, and one time, I was at a hospital and they were taping of of those shows, and the theme was high risk deliveries. We had to be very careful not to go down certain halls or get in anyone's way- and my client was having a nice, drug free birth right down the hall...: :

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#4 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 02:07 PM
 
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OMG!

I know, I know...I have viewed too many episodes of all the fine Delivery Delights offered by the Discovory folks. They were my birthing bible while pg the first time, and seriously influenced my desicions.

Ironically, they were also an influence this past birth, which was happy and at home.

Has anyone seen the episode that is used for the intro? The "older woman" birthing her baby who ends up having slow heart tones (because of a nucal cord) and the female OB with her big ol' glasses pulls the baby out w/ forceps? And then says to the baby, the day after the birth, you gave me some more grey hairs, I'm going to have to rinse my hair?

Or Davina Pappas, who pushes out her 4th baby, Baily, using Bradly techniques but does request an episiotomy?

What about Dr. Kirschbaum, that nice female OB who talks all about what a cerclage is?

What about that curly red-haired resident chick with glasses, who you can see LEARNING her skills on various laboring women on many episodes? Wild.

I don't like what's happening on the show, but MAN--you couldn't have a more objective and realistic mirror held up to the world of obstetrics than Birth Day. That's what it's like for most mamas in this country--I practically need an epidural WATCHING the show, it's all so unpleasant.

The unholy things done to women in the name of birth I shall never understand.
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#5 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 03:14 PM
 
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Originally posted by tinyshoes
I practically need an epidural WATCHING the show, it's all so unpleasant.


BWAHAHAHAHA!

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#6 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 03:14 PM
 
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Im Australian and when I first came here and saw those shows available I was like ooh cool births and watched a few...

I wish I hadn't! They made me so frustrated sad angry and disgusted!! Now I don't even watch them or flip by those channels. It is truly shocking and I feel so bad for those POOR babies.... I'd feel bad for the mothers too for being so misinformed and subjected to that brutality but I find it a little hard to feel bad for them when they've consented to the videotaping of their birth by tv crews!

Thats just asking for trouble IMO, from the hospital staff - the staff would FEEL like they HAD to do something actively to the labouring/birthing women and thus more intervention!

Bah! They need to see REAL births!
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#7 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 06:46 PM
 
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Originally posted by sharonal
Does anyone watch this show on Discovery Health Channel? First of all, the female narrator has THE most condescending voice, and she repeats the same things over and over. I sat here Saturday morning drinking my coffee and flipping channels and came across an episode where a woman was "allowed" to give birth to twins vaginally.

They broke her water, and she progressed very quickly. They had to rush her into the OR so she could push. The doctor was saying to some nurses, "We need to get her in there quick in case we've got to knock her out."

So, this poor woman is entirely unmedicated and is transferred to an operating table flat on her back with her legs in stirrups. She's obviously in a lot of pain, and was moaning and screaming. The nurse got right down in her face and said, "LOOK AT ME. CLOSE YOUR MOUTH, HOLD YOUR BREATH, AND PUSH! NO NOISES! NO SCREAMING!" Of course, the doctor gave her an episiotomy (both babies head down, the larger weighed 6 lbs) without her consent (that we saw, anyway). I felt so bad for her!
Okay, see why I chose to have my twins at home?

All I can say is I would have kicked the nurse, stood up on the table and squatted while screaming at the nurse....................

SHUT THE F*(&( UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then I would have freely began some primal screaming and praying.

And don't even get me started on what I would have done once I ripped the scalpel out of the doctor's hand.....

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#8 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 11:14 PM
 
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go hotmamacita go!

:LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL
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#9 of 38 Old 01-03-2004, 11:58 PM
 
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Originally posted by tinyshoes
I practically need an epidural WATCHING the show, it's all so unpleasant.

HAHAhAhAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!!!!!!!!

I know what you mean. The most unfortunate part about these shows is that women watch this crap and base it on all of their birth decisions and assume that this is how birth has to be. They make birth scary, compliments of bad OBs and hyped up media. Any intelligent women would wonder if birth has to be like this and make up her own mind and make better decisions. Unfortunately, this doesn't happen because we all know "Doctor Knows Best!" HA!

Low risk women take their healthy pregnancies to high risk OBs who turn their labor into pure hell, when it could be so much better. Makes me sad for the babies. Women are adults, they should be making better decisions than that, the babies are the victims of unecessarily violent births. And we all get to watch compliments of our local cable company!
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#10 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 12:00 AM
 
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hotmamacita:



That would never really happen because you are smart enought not to go to the hospital in the first place. Good for you.
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#11 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 12:24 AM
 
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I think it's great that they have these shows, because it's proof of the atrocities that still go on in hospitals. Every once in a while I come across someone who just does not believe that women are made to lie on their backs anymore... or not allowed to make noise... or yelled at to do purple pushing... or whatever. And I'm like, honey, you got cable? As soon as we get cable again I'm going to start taping some of these shows to show my children someday, maybe even birth education clients. Verrrry educational.
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#12 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 12:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Twelve hours later, I'm still very peeved at the way this hospital treated this woman. I can't imagine being told not to make any noise! That is beyond ridiculous to me!

"Hello? You just took some scissors and cut my muscles in a very sensitive area? I'm laying flat on my back with a child coming out of me? Oh, I'm sorry -- am I bothering you with my screaming?"
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#13 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 11:01 AM
 
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I htink I saw that episode. There was one on later about a family that had lost their babe at 37 weeks and they were inducing her at 37 weeks (they didn't know why the babe had died). Anyway, she cracked me up. When she went topush she kept telling the ob to :Move it..I can't see my baby being born!!!" He kept standing in front fo the mirror. As soon as he would move she would say...Thanks, now I can see him!

Then after the baby was born she kept screaming.... My baby! I love my baby! My baby is beuatiful! I want my baby! Give me my baby!

She got the baby for about 30 seconds before they took him away for "assessment" I started yelliung at the he tv...GIVE HER HER BABY!!! After all that family went through they had to "assess" within his first 2 minutes! THAT made me mad!

Her reaction was beautiful though.

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#14 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 06:03 PM
 
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Thats just asking for trouble IMO, from the hospital staff - the staff would FEEL like they HAD to do something actively to the labouring/birthing women and thus more intervention!
My thoughts, exactly! I don't get to watch Birth Day b/c I don't get that channel, but whenever I watch Maternity Ward, I wonder if the cameras and lights and "production" aspect plays a a part in the care the women receive. I know that psychology buffs would say "YES!"

Unfortunately, I LOVE watching these shows. I guess I'm a glutton for punishment. I stopped a few months back b/c I just wanted POSITIVE images for my birth, not seeing 100% of the women get epidurals. I want to remember that I CAN and WANT to do it my way.

The last episode of MW I watched, ALL the women birthed vaginally!!! Can you believe it??? I was so shocked, I wanted to post here about it! LOL But it was a great show, with even a drug-free birth. That's the only reason I allowed myself to watch hee hee!

My favorite thing is an ep. of baby story where a woman is about to deliver and is huffing and puffing, waiting for her doc to arrive IN A HELICOPTER from another birth, just to catch the baby!!! Who cares if the doc is there--I'd rather catch it myself! I just think he wanted to show off his new ride. :

Oh, and one last thing--what about the CNM that's always always on BS? She's spanish, has a birth center, etc. You know. anyway, I HATE how she always gives the clients a lesson on pushing right before they start. That would drive me nuts! Like the women are actually listening to her lecture. Anyway, I'm sure someone on MDC has had her or knows someone who has. I'm not saying she's bad, I just don't like her lecture on pushing. Just let the mamas push how they want to!

OK, I'm done rambling about my (formerly) favorite genre of TV show. The MOST educational stuff I've ever seen about birth. There's no trying to make it look pretty. It's the raw facts of how things work at most hospitals in America. YUCK!
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#15 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 07:54 PM
 
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Dh doesn't understand why I keep watching A Birth Story, because I rant all the way through them. Like the woman who was going in for a c-section because she was told her baby was too big, at least 9lbs. Yeah, like that really necessitates surgery. And of course, baby was like not even 8lbs.

Or all the times I hear nurses saying "you've been laboring for a few hours now with not much progress, how about some pitocin, it's no big deal, really it will just speed things up for you."

Or how many times I hear someone saying "she's taking a little longer than we'd like, so we're going to give her pitocin/rupture her membranes/do a c-section/whatever." Grrrr. Longer than "you'd" like? Who cares what you'd like is, it's her labor!
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#16 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 08:53 PM
 
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Originally posted by its_our_family
I htink I saw that episode. There was one on later about a family that had lost their babe at 37 weeks and they were inducing her at 37 weeks (they didn't know why the babe had died). Anyway, she cracked me up. When she went topush she kept telling the ob to :Move it..I can't see my baby being born!!!" He kept standing in front fo the mirror. As soon as he would move she would say...Thanks, now I can see him!

Then after the baby was born she kept screaming.... My baby! I love my baby! My baby is beuatiful! I want my baby! Give me my baby!

She got the baby for about 30 seconds before they took him away for "assessment" I started yelliung at the he tv...GIVE HER HER BABY!!! After all that family went through they had to "assess" within his first 2 minutes! THAT made me mad!

Her reaction was beautiful though.



They actually showed an episode where the baby died?? That just sounds so antithetical to these shows' message....i.e. things may go terribly wrong because birth is soooo dangerous but medical technology triumphs in the end!

And - the baby was dead but they took it away for assessment? What's to assess? Sheesh. :

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#17 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 08:59 PM
 
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No, No, no, Jane.... Their FIRST baby died at 37 wks, so they decided to deliver the second at 37 wks and took that one away minutes after birth for assessment.

I have seen a MW or two where a very premature baby or one with other severe complications dies. Very very sad, and I can't believe these families go through it with a camera crew taping everything. Why????

Anyway, does that clear things up for you, Jane?
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#18 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 09:21 PM
 
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Wow, I've never seen any of these shows. It's probably a good thing.

I still can't believe nurses tell mothers to stop screaming. I'm glad no one said that to me. I felt that if we had been at home, someone would have called the police. Dh kept asking the doula, "Is that normal?" but no one told me to be quiet or offered me drugs.

I'll have to ask my midwife how she handles loud screaming, but it also could be that without all the hospital procedures it won't hurt as much. But I'm planning to wear something just in case someone calls the police!

Re: delivering a still birth in the hospital - I hear sometimes they are incredibly insensitive around such matters - not letting the mother hold the baby, not letting them have time alone, not even giving her a recovery room away from the nursery.
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#19 of 38 Old 01-04-2004, 09:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally posted by oceanbaby
Dh doesn't understand why I keep watching A Birth Story, because I rant all the way through them. Like the woman who was going in for a c-section because she was told her baby was too big, at least 9lbs. Yeah, like that really necessitates surgery. And of course, baby was like not even 8lbs.

Or all the times I hear nurses saying "you've been laboring for a few hours now with not much progress, how about some pitocin, it's no big deal, really it will just speed things up for you."

Or how many times I hear someone saying "she's taking a little longer than we'd like, so we're going to give her pitocin/rupture her membranes/do a c-section/whatever." Grrrr. Longer than "you'd" like? Who cares what you'd like is, it's her labor!
I'm a glutton for punishment too -- I can't stop watching these shows.

I've seen these episodes, too, and I want to yell, "WAIT! STOP!" But then I think about it from the mom's perspective. In HER mind, she does want things to move more quickly, so the pitocin sounds like a positive. If you're very uncomfortable and someone nicely offers to get you out of the pain quicker, you're probably going to take it.

I don't think the way these meds are offered is truly informed consent -- they make them seem like miracle drugs. But I guess I can understand it a little, KWIM?

I get VERY peeved when doctors and nurses talk about a labor being different than THEY like.
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#20 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 12:49 AM
 
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If you're very uncomfortable and someone nicely offers to get you out of the pain quicker, you're probably going to take it.
One episode of MW a mom was talking to the anesthesiologist about it, and she asked, "So what are the risks?" He says,"Well, it's really very safe" And she asks, "But really, are there serious risks involved even if they're small?" And he says, "What do you want me to say, you can die or be paralyzed? Yes, that can happen, but extremely rare." But he said it in a sarcastic way where the mom was smiliing and said, OK! in the end. How twisted is that? Moms aren't told the truth when offered drugs. Only the moms who press for more info other than, "Oh, it's safe" actually get that info. At least on tv. And there was another young mom laboring with a friend as a coach, and they had both been to "natural birth" class, so they actually know what questions to ask! She was going to give in to a "very safe" drug until her friend reminded her, "Isn't there one that will go to the baby and we don't want that?" Then the nurses *finally* told them the truth after pressing them, and the mom said, "Oh then I don't want anything." I was SOOOO impressed with those gals!! And mad at the nurses!: But at the end of a drug free birth, the nurses are always SO proud of the moms. You'd think they'd be more encouraging of drug-free birth.

OK, I'll stop! Mixing the topics of TV and birth is NOT a good thing for me!!! I'll talk for ever!
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#21 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 02:42 AM
 
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mmmmmmm... these birth shows are VERY bothersome to me too! Doesn't it seem apparent that if women who have no other idea of how birth would go are shown more natural, beautiful births that some of the "emergency" births would never exist?! crazy media/medstaff.

We do have a friend, though, who was recounting her first birth the day after she delivered a few yrs ago (in a hospital w/ a modern doc) & said that "if it weren't for my awesome doctor finally yelling at me to PUSH, THIS ISN"T ABOUT YOU, IT'S ABOUT THIS BABY & YOU HAVE TO PUSH RIGHT NOW! I would still be in labor! haha"
she was totally serious & her husband was equally impressed by this awesome doc & staff - just delivered their 2nd baby with the same doc & hospital. Sad b'c I know what she's missing, but I'm happy thta they REALLY loved their birth this time too - in the end that's all that matters I know.

Seems as if some women need that type of treatment in childbirth. I mean, they don't NEED it of course, but they're programmed to expect it & wait for IT to give them the strength & conficence that is already there. Can't wait for the day when the majority of women have reclaimed their divine strength & ability in the birthing category. My sis is honestly Ms. Independant Woman, but for her birth, she's planning modern hospital all the way, maybe even a pre-scheduled cesarian & she hasn't been told of any health risks, I sooo don't understand that at all. I know it's her body, etc... but isn't vag birth better for the baby? dunno, i'm kind of new to this.. She's already calculated that she'll breastfeed for six months exactly as well. mmmmmmm... At least the media is now sort of promoting breastfeeding for six months, so it's going more mainstream as far as I know. Crazy how much people pay attention to the media isn't it???

Sidenote... I also have a BIL who finished his residency in a maternity ward, was contemplating going into permanently... after being around the docs & staff during several deliveries, he's now focussing on homeopathic medicine & adolescent psych.
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#22 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 02:52 AM
 
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Originally posted by EmmaJean
No, No, no, Jane.... Their FIRST baby died at 37 wks, so they decided to deliver the second at 37 wks and took that one away minutes after birth for assessment.

I have seen a MW or two where a very premature baby or one with other severe complications dies. Very very sad, and I can't believe these families go through it with a camera crew taping everything. Why????

Anyway, does that clear things up for you, Jane?
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#23 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 09:48 AM
 
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I saw one of those shows where the Mum was groaning (not screaming) whilst pushing and the nurses told her to be quiet. her husband then held her lips shut .

I couldn't believe it, I was shouting "Just headbut the ****er!". What an awful thing to do. She was so focused on what she was doing that it didn't seem to phase her but if my DH did anything like that ...... . Not that he would, as I told him about the programme and he was appalled.
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#24 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 10:30 AM
 
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Prior to my births, not at the last minute, my homebirth midwives suggested I not scream. Low moaning, and a relaxed mouth was more conducive to effective birthing.
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#25 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 11:14 AM
 
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That is true -- sometimes. I think it's a common misconception -- I think it started with Lamaze and was then promoted in the homebirth movement by Ina May Gaskin in Spirital Midwifery -- that low noises equal release and non-resistance to the body, and that high noises equal tenseness and fighting the body.

But actually, making loud, high-piched noises -- if that is what the mother feels compelled to do -- can release tension and therefore facilitate efficient birth. During my first labor, the midwife was constantly on me not to make certain noises, not to scrunch up my face, etc. This was, however, so contrary to what I felt like doing that it was a huge effort to even attempt it and the result was that I became more tense than I was to begin with, and that did not make for an efficient birth process. It was an extremely inefficient birth process.

For my next two births I allowed myself to respond to the pain instinctively and spontaneously -- which included making a LOT of noise, ranging from deep moans to high-pitched wails and roars. Those were two extremely efficient births -- each time the pushing phase was under ten minutes, and the baby was born easily and with no perineal trauma whatsoever. Of course, there were other things that contributed to that, my point is just that the noises I was making did not hinder that, they actually helped me throuw myself with no resistance into the labor.
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#26 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 02:45 PM
 
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arthead, you brought up some really good points, specifically that these shows are teaching women how to birth and what to expect.

I think of myself....

Way back when I was a 10-year-old girl and my mom told me that doctors deliver babies, I remember my irritation and dissapointment when I realized that I wouldn't be the first to touch my baby.

Flash-forward to seeing post-partum hosptial pictures of the first baby born to a cousin of mine, and I was so STUNNED--there was an IV in her hand! WHAT? I thought she was just having a baby!

But soon, as I became pregnant with my first baby and packed in the knowlege offered by Birth Day, A Baby Story, Maternity Ward, and Labor and Delivery, all of those interventions and procedures seemed completely appropriate.

Therefore, when I was almost 39 weeks with baby #1 and my gold-chain wearing OB (why do all male OBs wear gold chains? what's up with that!? :LOL ) suggested elective induction for this coming Wednesday, his surgery day, I jumped at the option...

...because these shows taught me that basically you're GOING to get IV Pit, an epi, and maybe a c/sec (but hopefully just an episiotomy). They're going to mash blue paper 'blankets' on your newborn baby to wipe it off, they're going to hoist your legs into padded ski-boot stirrups, and hopefully, you'll know how to push properly, taking notes while watching the shows during your pregnancy.

There is such a g u l f between what we here in Happy MDC Land think of about birth, and how most American women percieve birth.

Honestly, in that sense, and in light of the junk you see on TV, how 'stupid' is a scheduled c/sec? In some ways, it is the most empowered choice a woman shackled to this disgusting system of obstetrical care can hope for--she can help pick the DAY...because she's sure as h-e-double hockey sticks not going to be part of making any other birthing choices during the labor process.

Women just don't know that birthing is not a nightmare, because it has been a nightmare for women in this country for too long (our mothers and grandmothers.)

UGH.......back to a more OP rant...

I think one could make quite an effective argument saying that because of the 'birthing' junk seen on TV, it is indeed warping the minds of American women. And to be fair, I do praise A Baby Story for showing waterbirths, birth center births (yes, even with that slightly annoying hispanic MW who gives mamas a pushing lecture during transition) and homebirths--but sadly, that's just a small percetage and there is none of that on Birth Day, Maternity Ward, and Labor and Delivery, of course.

Blueviolet, I think I'm inspired by your idea to archive a few epidsodes for posterity...to show my own babes in the future, and to show any pregnant mamas who wander into my Devious Web of Natural Birthing Information.
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#27 of 38 Old 01-05-2004, 08:54 PM
 
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Totally OT

A friend of mine didn't have a gold chain wearing OB but his name was Dr. Cassanova and he was exceedingly handsome and pretty much let her have the birth she wanted, albeit in the hospital.

I get such a kick out of an OB/GYN named Dr. Cassanova. :heartbeart

Or a proctologist named Richard Chop. :LOL
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#28 of 38 Old 01-06-2004, 12:46 AM
 
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Okay, I watched this again today (A Baby Story). Both were C-sections. The first woman went in and was at 2cm. She and her dh walked the hallway for a short amount of time, and then she was at 4cm. The doc then decided to break her waters because, and I quote, "It will just make everything quicker and easier." Then of course contractions got too painful so she asked for an epidural. Then the baby was in a bad position (they didn't specify how, but it wasn't breech because the head was down), so they tried forceps. That didn't work so they did a c-section.

Okay, does it occur to anyone else that if they hadn't broken her bag of waters that the baby might have been more likely to switch positions? Not once did anyone encourage her to get up out of bed and try switching positions herself to get the baby to turn.

I felt so bad for this woman. This was her first pregnancy, so of course all her subsequent pregnances will have to be C-sections because so few docs will "allow" VBACs.

I love the ones that show watebirths or homebirths. Unfortunately, they are so few and far between, and I only get to watch when I'm sick in bed (like today), so I rarely see them. I wish someone would produce a show just like A Baby Story but with solely non-intervention births. I think they would do great ratings wise - I mean, come on, a woman screaming in pain is a lot more dramatic to watch than one who is composed and quiet!

Please know that I am not knocking any of the specific interventions - I think they are all important to have and can be quite lifesaving when used appropriately. But like some of the previous posters have mentioned, it really bugs me that these shows teach the idea that birth must be so incredibly medicalized.
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#29 of 38 Old 01-07-2004, 05:20 PM
 
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When I was in labor with my dd, I screamed...quite a bit (hehehe), it was my way of dealing with the pain. Well after a pretty loud yell a nurse(there were many, many people in my delivery room because of my dd's prematurity~she was a 32 weeker~) tells me that it will go by faster if I hold my breath. She was "politely" telling me to shut up. It didn't work, I still screamed. With my second delivery (both my babies were born in a hospital...) I was screaming, again to deal with the pain...BUT...my ob was screaming right back at me to push.....not once did he tell me to shut up (((((and I called him some pretty "creative" names))).
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#30 of 38 Old 01-08-2004, 01:06 PM
 
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I don't get the discovery health channel anymore but I sometimes watched those shows. I liked birth day the LEAST the narrator drove me nuts :LOL. And they never showed positive home births or anything like baby story at least sometimes does.

I agree with everyone that said the docs do more since the cameras are rolling. What is wrong with showing a normal birth that the mom has control of and doesn't get pain meds, an episiotomy and pushes not lying down?? What is it not exciting enough, this isn't an action drama docs geesh!

I feel bad for those mamas who don't know any better and really think that is what birth has to be .

I did have a nurse during my first labor tell me make noise if it makes you feel better but to get enough energy and oxygen it's better not to. But she was very nice about it and didn't tell me to shut up and push kwim? I actually did take her advice and felt better not hollering in that delivery but did hollar a bit with my second, and not as much with my third. I did what I wanted and I pushed them all out in about the same amount of time so not sure if it does matter much or not.

So many people thought I was nuts for bypassing the epidural and all pain meds all 3 times, I'm glad here at least I know I'm not a nutjob :LOL.

Dh had a vasectomy so I'm not planning more kids but if it flunks and I do get pregnant I want a homebirth. They don't usually allow that where I live (on a military base) but I would just not go to the hospital and tell them the baby came too fast .
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