- E . Single mom to DS E (15.12.05), T (reincarnated 18.04.08) and DD A (11.02.11) and Hoppy
A neighbor knew we were looking for childcare for DD during the birth and offered to help if we had no luck finding someone. I mentioned that we needed someone who would be comfortable being here as it happened since we're planning a homebirth. Somehow she misunderstood, and thought I was asking her to catch! She responded that she didn't know a lot about "delivering babies" but that she would read up on it on WebMD to help us out.
After explaining a bit more, including the part about the highly qualified midwife who would be assisting us, she asked if we'd be going to the hospital for the epidural and then coming home again to have the baby. After explaining that part, she got a little worried, and whispered, "You know, women died a lot before epidurals were invented."
Then there is the massage therapist at my chiropractor's office, who asked if we'd, "..you know, like, be on the phone with, like, 911 or something". Then she asked how we would get the baby washed and whatnot. "You know, we'll, like, do it ourselves..." I said.
I'm finding it kind of fun to tell people about it if they ask things like who's my OB or what hospital am I using. I haven't had any outright negative reactions, and the stuff they come up with is really quite entertaining!
Various people have also asked me if I went to the hospital afterward...um, if I didn't want to go in the first place, why would I go afterward if the birth went well?
someone else asked if I had to get my dr.'s permission! How sad people think dr.s are like gods!
Another one asked how I could ever get my home as clean as a hospital delivery room. "Will you have all the walls washed down with disinfectant first?"
And a friend said I would not want to use the room I gave birth in afterwards, because "It would look like you slaughtered a pig in there!"
My best was talking with another mom from church and I was talking to her about homebirthing. She knew ds was born at home and asked if dd was also. I told her I tried really hard to but she ended up being a c-section. She asked if they could do that at home and I was like, nooo way! Answered her "what do you do at home if you need a c-section?" question.. ya go to the hospital! I think she realized very quickly that it was a silly question. I think she might have misunderstood me thinking that I said my dd was born at home by c-section, and was confused.
Well, yeah, I plan to have one available, but that isn't the whole point of home birth, and it's not like I'm going to commit NOW to having the baby in the pool. But it's the only thing people can come up with to say when I mention our plans.
Melissa, wife to Brian, mommy to my home born, breastfeeding, sling-riding, sleep sharing, cloth diapered, intact kiddos Adam 11/09 and Leah 8/12.
However I am planning on laboring at home for as long as possible and having a completely natural childbirth. EVERYONE except my boyfriend thinks I am insane. They think you need to have a epi especially if it is your first, you have to go to the hospital as soon as your water breaks, BF is a bad idea and makes your breasts sag, its just insane the lack of research and or knowledge people have because of the media.
I was over a friends house yesterday and she is addicted to those baby shows on discovery channel. She looks at me and was like, "see you need to have pain meds, she has an epi and is still screaming at the top of her lungs". I just shook my head, and said yay for media scaring women, our bodies are made to have babies, we have been doing it for many many years. Sigh its never ending :
“It is simply no longer possible to believe much of the clinical research that is published, or to rely on the judgment of trusted physicians or authoritative medical guidelines.” - Marcia Angell, M.D., former NEJM Editor Private Parts are Private Property!
Hmmm. I somehow managed to hold my tongue since we needed this dude's help (and he did deign, reluctantly, to be my backup). My husband was amazed--I rarely think before speaking. We were floored, as it was like the doc wanted us to have a back-alley birth with no trained attendants. Ugh.
Happily, we didn't go to the hospital, except for tests when I was 10 days overdue. Of course they wanted to induce me, but I demurred. After the birth I sent announcement to both the docs with explainations of how great the homebirth was.
This is wonderful though -
Not a negative comment, but it was a jaw-dropper nonetheless. I've been hesitant to tell dh's family about our plan for a home birth because they already think we're nuts for having our first at a birth center. Somehow it came up with my GMIL and I told her that we're planning a home birth this time around, and she got really excited because we'll have a nice big tub in the master bedroom where we're moving to soon. "Oh how NICE! You should do it at home, you'll have your own little private suite!" I was really shocked because she is the most pro-pharmaceuticals-and-doctors-for-everything person we know, but she went on to tell me all about the "program with Ricki Lake and all the midwives" she watched (Business of Being Born), and how she would be terrified of a hospital birth with how high the c-section rates are climbing. It was just really nice and surprising to get that kind of support from her. :
Single Mom with a BF Mommy to 2 girls & 2 boys
Using the Law of Attraction Loving my Family
Wife to K since 6/95 Mommy to "The Fellas" ages 13, 10 and 8 and our rainbow girly 12/09.
Always remembering my babies who could not stay '08 '08 '09
And this weekend, so dh is the midwife then, ummm, no he just holds my hand. But he delivers the baby, no I catch my own baby.
I said "I went into labor, the midwives came out, the baby was born, the midwives went home"
I was showing my late grandma pictures of the birth. Someone put a hat Dd's head soon after she came to the surface and Grandma saw a picture of her with a hat on. She said "She was born with a hat on?" Grandma was supportive of homebirth. Her twin brother and sister were born at home in the 1920's and she was there. She said they would have died if they'd been born in the hospital. They were premature and her mother carried them around the house with her in a laundry basket everywhere she went.
Upon finding out that I was having a homebirth a male coworker said "I can't believe your husband is going to let you do that"
Actually, I had one very nice reaction from an elderly man. He and his DW had lived in a small village in Scotland, and he told me that back then, most babies in the area were born at home attended by midwives. He said having a baby at home is "so much nicer." He described his daughter being born, and almost immediately holding her in his arms, with tears in his eyes even though it happened over forty years ago.
and once, when explaining that the mw's bring their own medical gear in event of emergency (oxygen and such), one person asked if they also brought the IV pole too (because *every* woman uses an IV, right? it's impossible to birth without one!), and the epidural... even more shock follows after being told that no, you can't have an epidural at home.
Momma to K ('01), E ('03) and A ('07)
Proud Gestational Surrogate to N (15/01/15)
Elizabeth - Doing life with Scott
SAHM to Evelyn - my crazy little Celiac (4) Annabelle (2) and Abraham (born 6/20)
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