Moms w/ long prodormal labor... positive thoughts and experiences-please - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 02:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know I haven't had as bad as some of you, but it is wearing me down emotionally. And for me it seems that my stress is highly tuned into when I can go into labor. I thought yesterday was really the day, but for various reasons it didn't happen. I am starting to feel very defective and every negative thing I can think of keeps floating through my head. I am currently 41 weeks, but as my other 2 came 12 and 6 days early this being late is entirely new for me. Physically I feel good for the most part, although hardly sleeping the last 2 nights due to stress and contractions is wearing me thin. So, if anyone that has made it through the other side wants to share pretty, pretty please! Not to be too specific but I need really positive stories- positive thoughts- affirmations.

Happily Married to my : 11 yrs- Mama to wild-eyed monkey boy 7-04, fiery little girl 4-07, and the happy smiley baby that sleeps 11-09!
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#2 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 05:26 PM
 
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I'm so sorry....i was there just 2 months ago! It sucks! I had prodromal labor (the whole shebang- little appetite, diarrhea, ctx) for 3 weeks before active labor; it is so exhasting- even the thought of induction starts to sound appealing!

Whatever can be ignored- ignore! And remember that your body is getting work done. Do you know the position of your baby? Mine was posterior- a major cause of prodromal labor. If you can, try and help baby turn (walking, crawling, etc) and spinningbabies.com. Eventually, what pushed me in to labor was a 2nd membrane sweep (had one the week before- did nothing except for bloody show and bad cramps) when I was 5 cm dilated.
After that, one hour later, my water broke with a major ctx, and just a few hours later I was holding my baby!

Good luck to you! See if your midwife can do anything to help you along- you don't want to be so exhausted when you do go into "real" labor. Your baby will come!

Minimalist-living mama on an urban ecovillage with DH and DS- Jack (9/18/09)
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#3 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 05:31 PM
 
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Oh yes. I was there four years ago this week- I had a month of it. The story is at www.homebirth.org.uk/helenskye.htm What worked for me:

If today is the day I meet my baby, how do I want to write our birth story? Do I want to tell a story that goes "woke up, felt miserable. Whinged and whined a bit, felt miserable, complained, didn't have time to see the sunshine, threw up a bit, did the school run then went to bed"? Or do I want to give myself a birth story with a bit of positivity in it?

Do not do ANYTHING to induce labour, ever, ever, ever. If it's meant to make contractions longer/stronger/harder, don't do it. It's not worth it.

TENS helps. Seriously, seriously, it can help.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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#4 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 05:42 PM
 
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Originally Posted by crunchy_mama View Post
Physically I feel good for the most part, although hardly sleeping the last 2 nights due to stress and contractions is wearing me thin. So, if anyone that has made it through the other side wants to share pretty, pretty please! Not to be too specific but I need really positive stories- positive thoughts- affirmations.
You know, in your case I'd probably consider a nice bath and add in some relaxing EOs or bubble bath or even a glass of wine with dinner. I know some women find that any of the two is enough to help them relax enough in the evening that sleeping goes a bit better. Do you find that you sleep better during the day? Can you arrange an afternoon nap at all?

If that's not your cup of tea, what might be? Massage? Pedicure/manicure?

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I'm so sorry....i was there just 2 months ago! It sucks! I had prodromal labor (the whole shebang- little appetite, diarrhea, ctx)
This is where I've found myself the past couple of days so all of the above things I've mentioned definitely are in my mind. I'm also in the "ignoring" camp. If dh can do it (or someone else) or it can go undone it does.

On the positive side...I have heard that labor can go quite quickly since your body's already been at work.
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#5 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 06:07 PM
 
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Had prodromal labor with my second child for 10 days. It drove me absolutely batty because I kept thinking "maybe Now it's really labor" and it wasn't! So here are my thoughts/suggestions:

- Relax - read an interesting book (preferably in the bathtub with scented candles)
- Keep busy - I spent my days going out to lunch with friends/my mom; going to the park with my DD - 2 1/2 at the time - and window shopping. I wasn't speed walking or anything to induce labor, just getting out of the house!
- Take advantage of any boredom you have - this was in Sept of '05 so I cleaned out DD's closet and swapped out her summer and winter things. It needed to be done and I was tired of sitting around waiting for the baby to arrive.
- Change the message on your vm or answering machine! All 3 of my kids arrived after their due dates and the phone calls from relatives drove me nuts. So I changed the message on my vm to say "The baby hasn't arrived yet we're just busy! We'll call you when she/he gets here!" (Funny story... I forgot to change it back after our 3rd was born so it said that for 2 months after his birth!)

I literally put those pesky little contractions out of my mind. When I woke up one morning with real contrax that were painful and quite close together that was it. We called my mom, she came over and DH & I headed off to the hospital. She was born 2 minutes after we walked through the security point. My entire labor from the time I woke up was 1 hour 38 mins. She came out in half of a push. And my doc got there 20 mins later!! LOL.

Again, relax! Your LO will arrive when it's time. Don't stress yourself watching the clock or the calendar.

Beth
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#6 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 06:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks ladies, so very, very much! All of it helps. It really does. As to the baby's position it was anterior last it was checked- I am not the best at checking myself, I am not having back pain or anything. If the baby doesn't come in the next day or two I will be seeing the mw again to recheck all of that. I thought a lot about my fears and realized that they are all stemming solely from the fact that I haven't went into labor yet, which bugs me so much that I can tell anyone else to trust their body and baby yet I am struggling myself. I took a little catnap while ago as well and am going to try and keep myself occupied w/ anything but myself! I am not doing any kind of inducing natural as I just don't feel right about that.

Happily Married to my : 11 yrs- Mama to wild-eyed monkey boy 7-04, fiery little girl 4-07, and the happy smiley baby that sleeps 11-09!
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#7 of 20 Old 11-22-2009, 11:58 PM
 
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Do you have anything that's keeping you emotionally/or subconsciously "not ready" to meet your baby?

I had about 3 weeks of prodromal labor - ctx every day at 2 minutes apart, lasting hours and hours.
My FIL was staying with us, working on our house.. the birthing room was NOT close to being ready.
I had my baby about a week after FIL finally left!
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#8 of 20 Old 11-23-2009, 01:12 AM
 
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My #3 came after three weeks of pretty much nightly bouts of contractions that would settle into predictable patterns, increase in intensity and then fizzle away.

The night before she came, I started talking to the contractions. I was chanting at them, or something (so out of character for me... I'm a pretty no-nonsense gal, not particulary touchy feely or at all new-agey.) I told them to come harder, faster, stronger, longer, etc. They fizzled out again, I got some sleep, and then woke up in labor. I talked to the contractions again, but maybe it worked a little too well -- within 2 hours (and about 10 minutes of arriving at the hospital) she was in my arms. It was an intense ride once labor started.

Your baby will be here so soon!
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#9 of 20 Old 11-23-2009, 04:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I have tried very hard to do any emotional release that I can. I am fairly certainly it has stopped at times due to the fact that the timing was not right for one reason or another- my mw said that perhaps that is my special skill being able to stop labor. However, my mw is currently available and I have dh home from work. I cannot think of anything else mentally that I need or anything else that I can work on- I have been having lots of talk w/ baby and w/ God and then lots of begging I have really tried hard to examine that angle and honestly don't know what else to explore in that area or I would be at it.

Happily Married to my : 11 yrs- Mama to wild-eyed monkey boy 7-04, fiery little girl 4-07, and the happy smiley baby that sleeps 11-09!
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#10 of 20 Old 11-23-2009, 12:42 PM
 
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On the positive side...I have heard that labor can go quite quickly since your body's already been at work.
That's what happened for me. I only had 3 days of prodromol, then got an epidural with my first baby, and, even with the epidural/1st time mom, went from 5 to 10 cm in like 2 hours. The midwife (who came on duty at the beginning of those 2 hours) was amazed. So I know SOMETHING was going on those 3 days. GOOD LUCK!
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#11 of 20 Old 11-23-2009, 02:39 PM
 
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No real advice, but lots of sympathy. I'm in the same boat as you. I'm now at 3 weeks, one day of this prodromal stuff and I think I'm getting a handle on it emotionally, but it's absolutely exhausting physically...for me the 'not knowing' was really, really hard. Both of my previous births were pretty straightforward and quick, so this threw me off in a big way.

MW has encouraged me to ignore what I can ignore and be patient when I can't ignore them....don't rush into a baby-having panic...again hard to do because DS2 was born just over two hours after I woke up, so I've been expecting all pregnancy that I'll have to muster the troops in a hurry.

Mine are worse in the evening. If you're game to try it, a glass of wine can work wonders, as can a foot-rub and a warm tub. I definately notice that I have really strong, close contractions if I've over-done it that day (I always do!) or if I'm particularly stressed out. I've tried to either cook most of dinner earlier in the day, or plan for something simple and delegate to DH. I've also noticed that gassy foods can make the contractions worse...I guess it's similar to the cod-liver-oil-to-induce theory that irritated guts can irritate uterus, too.

The worst part for me has been how 'touched-out' and irritable I am. My kids are both needing more snuggles as we get close, especially at night (both are still cosleeping), and I have to really force myself to not flip out every time one of them strokes my arm or rubs my ear....or worse, accidentally brushes a nipple....UGH! I know they need me and things will change after the baby is born, so I try to breathe deeply and think happy thoughts. I'm pretty grumpy, too, which is hard on my family.

Still, no-one's stayed pregnant forever, right? Right? The end is in sight and I believe that all this work means that I will have a wonderfully easy birth...I hope you do, too, and soon.

Oh, I wanted to add that even though I wouldn't do anything drastic to encourage labour, I have been trying a little nipple stimulation in the shower every few days just to see if that helps things get started....and I'm eyeing DH with a look he hasn't seen since month 5 pretty often. I believe that gentle things to either stop (glass of wine) or start (nipple stim) contractions will not work unless my body is already on that path. So, it gives me something to feel like I'm DOING something, but won't hurt in the long run and may just help, KWIM?

Gwen , partner to D ; Mamma to T (6) , J (4) , and baby P
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#12 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 04:53 AM
 
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I know it sucks! Had it with my last two babes. My only positive thought is that when I *finally* went into active labor, I delivered in 3 hrs.
Try to relax as much as possible. Peppermint and chamomile tea. A warm bath. Whatever you can do to get your body some relief and rest. The baby WILL come. Probably very soon. Hang in there.

Mom of 4 aspiring midwife "Friend"ly seeker
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#13 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 12:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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just an update here- had baby last night at 9p- had 6 hrs of labor, would have been quicker than that but I was trying not to encourage it too much waiting for the mw! she was a bit oddly positioned, which was possibly causing some issue and her hand was by her head, which was not very fun to push out!

thanks again for the encouragemnt it really helps and hopefully there are some other moms out there goint through the same thing that it will help as well.

Happily Married to my : 11 yrs- Mama to wild-eyed monkey boy 7-04, fiery little girl 4-07, and the happy smiley baby that sleeps 11-09!
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#14 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 12:48 PM
 
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Congratulations! My #3 (the cause of all of my prodromal labor) also had a nuchal hand!
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#15 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 05:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Congratulations! My #3 (the cause of all of my prodromal labor) also had a nuchal hand!
That is sooo interesting!

Happily Married to my : 11 yrs- Mama to wild-eyed monkey boy 7-04, fiery little girl 4-07, and the happy smiley baby that sleeps 11-09!
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#16 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 10:22 PM
 
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I think I'm at the very beginning of this... I have had a few days (or a week now?) of painfulish contractions that just stop at a certain point... I've 3 more weeks to go and I guess it will be 3 weeks of this!

But that is okay I guess because it will make for a faster labor...

I plan on just relaxing *a lot* over the Thanksgiving holiday and eating lots of good food (I am *so* hungry lately!) and taking naps.

OP, I'm glad you had your little one!

 hh2.gif  ~~~~~~~~~~hh2.gif
 

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#17 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 10:38 PM
 
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Yay for a baby!!!

I'm ALSO in the same boat- going on 4 weeks of 1 minute-long contrax, every 3-5 minutes. I'm at 36w4d, and I'm 50% sure it's the "real thing" now- I can't explain it, but something changed today, and everything just feels weird.

It's esp weird bc my first labor was fast (posterior and 6 hrs active to baby) so I'm a LITTLE nervous that I'm going to go into active labor and have a baby in the car!

Big money/no babies vibes for us early mommas, big baby/no whammy vibes for you mommas who are ready to go!!!

Doctors aren't out to kill you or your children. Childbirth isn't inherently safe. Science is actually smarter than your intuition. Lighten up. Use sunscreen.

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#18 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 10:52 PM
 
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I'm not sure mine count as long prodromal labors, maybe just long early labors. I'd have bouts of strong contractions through pregnancy but not for too long, then days of nonstop spaced out contractions. Once active labor kicks in it really kicks in. Enjoy the rest, breaks in the middle of labor sound nice in a way compared to my experience, though frustrating too. Take good care of yourself and see that others do so for you, this is still your time even if it's being stop and go.
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#19 of 20 Old 11-24-2009, 11:09 PM
 
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Ugh, Prodromal Labor. No fun!!!!

Here's a list of things that I've found helpful (and posted all over the place) that you might find helpful too. Just some suggestions, take what you want, leave the rest!

This is a list of things that helped through prodromal labor. And, I need to tell you 6 weeks with the last two weeks being intense is all in the realm of normal. It's how many of us labor. A lot of women are induced in the hospital so we just don't hear so much about prodromal labor anymore. A percentage of women who birth without augmentation, experience prodromal labor. It's a very normal yet can be an incredibly frustrating pattern. In the end though, when your labor naturally unfolds by itself without encouragement, then your birth will be so much faster than without the prodromal labor. Be prepared for a fast one if your babe is properly positioned, okay? My 3rd was prodromal labor for weeks & weeks & weeks, but then she was born in 1 hour, 40 minutes when labor finally did kick in. My 4th was even more prodromal labor & when I finally had one ctx that felt 'different', I was push 30 minutes later.

Prodromal Labor - what works for many women. Take what you think would work for you, leave the rest:
- Do you contract more when you walk around? If so, when you start a ctx pattern, lay down & rest. If you contract more when you lay down, then walk & be upright more. You need to do whatever to NOT encourage ctx at this point. It will happen. But, encouraging prodromal labor to continue is not beneficial at this point.
- Go for a walk by yourself (or with your partner if you feel drawn to that). Talk to the baby. Tell him/her that there is peace all around. That you trust in his/her timing. Cry if you need to.
- If you're trying to, stop trying to bring on labor. Any kind of encouragement for labor during a prodromal pattern CAN result in an irritated uterus, thus exacerbating prodromal labor & tiring you out before the big day. The baby's just not ready yet. He/she will guide you when the timing is right. Your body doesn't need any extra stimulation right now. It's time to rest & gather your energy for the birth.
- Physical - is there something physical holding your body back? Baby positioning, dehydration, etc.
- Emotional - You're feeling ready to meet this baby. High stress in your life? Is there anything else holding you back?
- Plan something for tomorrow. Lunch with a friend without kids, massage, cafe for a latte by yourself before DH leaves for work, whatever. Make a plan.
- Make a plan for next week with an understanding friend. "Hey, let's do lunch on Monday, barring me giving birth." Pick a place you LOVE to eat at. Make it a set weekly date until you give birth.
- If you feel like you need to birth soon, let go of the expectation. If you need to, you will. How does next Friday sound for birth? Or perhaps 15 days from now? (I know that probably sounds like hell, but instead of telling yourself that tonight is the night each night & spreading your focus so thin, if you pick a date further away, it helps the energy build. Yeah, that's woowoo, but sometimes woowoo works.)
- Take a look at your supplements. I did Polly Someone's 5-week labor prep herbs once that sent my body over the edge. I was in labor for about 4 days straight before I finally stopped the herbs & then my ctx went back to a normal pattern for me. Red Raspberry leaf can even cause more ctx than necessary.
- Surround yourself with love & only do things that you want to do. This is not the time to do dishes. This is the time to rent a girly movie & get a foot rub. Cancel the obligations you don't want to go to, create fun obligations with people you enjoy instead.
- If you JUST need the ctx to stop to get some rest, try a small glass of white wine.

Spark and her four firecrackers.
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#20 of 20 Old 11-25-2009, 12:53 AM
 
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Congrats mama!!! My third was the only one where I had prodromal labor and he also was born with his hand on his head.
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