I think this is a good Q and I think it's smart to discuss in advance. Certainly, I can see how a man might worry that possibly,
watching a baby come out of his DW's vagina may make him perceive said vagina as 'not so sexy' anymore.
I personally was concerned as well, but as we took Bradley training & as time went on, we both started to look forward to birth more & more (& previously, I had dreaded it! Thinking it was only ever gross & unpleasant!) DH even watched birth videos on YouTube on his own & got teary-eyed! (& he's one of the least emotional people I know!)
got the idea to want to catch
DS -which he did!
Our sex life is great & he even wanted some action the day after I got home from the hospital!
The moral of the story is to keep an open mind, keep communication open, don't push, be respectful of his feelings. If he wants to stay by your head, so be it. I would just encourage him to think about these issues!
His knee-jerk reaction may be, "EW, GROSS!" because that is the culture we were raised in!! It takes time & introspection to overcome our upbringing in this way, IMO.
DH says he doesn't have a problem at all seeing my vagina as 'not sexy.'
HOWEVER - he DID get a bit "weirded out" a couple times about BFing. I'm an A-cup & always have been. If it had been a few hours since I'd BFed, they'd be nice, big round, probably near C. of course, he thought this was very sexy (hey, they did look hot!) Then he'd see me latch on DS & his brain would get a little confused - wires crossing!!!
Of course, he watched me latch on DS over & over. But he's OK with it. He just had to not look at my breasts when I was 'stacked' like that
. (Now that DS is 18 mos, they don't get engorged like that anymore anyway.)
***Don't take that to mean he didn't like me BFing! He was unbelievably supportive - provided way more help than the awful hospital-LCs! It's just that a few times he found my breasts arousing, then when he saw me latch DS on, it was a little "weird." But it only happened to him a couple times. For the most part, it was no big deal, not a problem.