Happy, but upset too! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 12 Old 02-17-2010, 11:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Not sure where to put this, but just so upset! My best friend had her baby boy yesterday morning at 8 am and he's so cute. Really chubby! He was born with a collapsed lung and was rushed to the NICU. It is now 24 hours later, and she still hasn't been able to see him and hold him! Not even for a second when he was born! It just breaks my heart, and she's so upset and in lots of pain because of her emergency c-section. We're all worried about the baby, but I'm just shaking thinking that could have been the baby I gave birth to 8 weeks ago! I don't know what I would have done if they had taken her away from me for 24+ whole hours!
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#2 of 12 Old 02-17-2010, 11:21 AM
 
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Thati s really sad. Those first moments immediately after birth are so important, but obviously baby's & mama's health comes first. It's ridiculous they make moms wait so long to see their babies. I'd be DEMANDING to see my baby!

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#3 of 12 Old 02-17-2010, 11:28 AM
 
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It sounds like such an upsetting situation, but if pics are getting out (and it sounds like they are) it doesn't sound so much like they're keeping her away from the baby as she's not physically able to go to the NICU herself right now.

My heart goes out to the whole family. It must be a really awful time.
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#4 of 12 Old 02-17-2010, 12:39 PM
 
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I'm so grateful everyone was healthy and I was able to have that bonding on the first day with my baby. It really is a special time. I know a lady who had preemie triplets and she spiked a fever immediately after the birth -- she wasn't able to see her babies for several days, poor thing, because a fever could have been fatal to them. She had a steady stream of photos coming in -- her first glimpse of them was actually on the nurse's Iphone. Now they're about 8 months old, at home, and she gets all the babies she can handle.

Jen, journalist, policy wonk, and formerly a proud single mama to my sweet little man Cyrus, born at home Dec. 2007 . Now married to my Incredibly Nice Guy and new mama to baby Arthur.
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#5 of 12 Old 02-17-2010, 03:05 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MeepyCat View Post
It sounds like such an upsetting situation, but if pics are getting out (and it sounds like they are) it doesn't sound so much like they're keeping her away from the baby as she's not physically able to go to the NICU herself right now.

My heart goes out to the whole family. It must be a really awful time.
: I didn't get to see my dd1 for over 24 hours because I was still to sick to make it to the NICU. They sent pictures and made videos, but I didn't actually make it till the day after she was born and even then I couldn't stay long because I was still too weak. It doesn't sound like this is a case of the NICU "taking the baby away", it sounds like the mom might still be too weak to make it. I hope she will get to see her baby soon and that they both have a quick and easy recovery.

Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker. - Linus
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#6 of 12 Old 02-17-2010, 04:07 PM
 
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DD was 2 days old before I was able to see her and hold her. She was taken to a NICU an hour away and I hadn't been released from the hospital. Luckily I was released quickly an was able to move into the hospital until she was released three or so days later.
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#7 of 12 Old 02-18-2010, 02:01 PM
 
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Is daddy with baby? Research shows that skin to skin with daddy is almost equally beneficial... So sorry for mama. This must be horribly hard. Can she get there via wheelchair? I cannot imagine being separated like this
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#8 of 12 Old 02-18-2010, 02:22 PM
 
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If they are in the same hospital why can't they wheel mom down on a gurney for a brief hello. It would be beneficial for mom AND baby to see/hear oneanother even if just for a moment.

DH&Me  Christ follower, homeschooler, gardener, (insert lots of additional crunchiness here) chicken mama, & occasionally blogger. intactlact.gifMama of  boys 9,7,3.5,&11months....& SURPRISE jaw2.gif  expecting a BOY in November!  7 sweet-babes gone too soon.

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#9 of 12 Old 02-18-2010, 04:57 PM
 
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Originally Posted by 2sweetboysmom View Post
If they are in the same hospital why can't they wheel mom down on a gurney for a brief hello. It would be beneficial for mom AND baby to see/hear oneanother even if just for a moment.
Depends on the hospital set up and how strict of a level of NICU the baby is in.

I didn't get to see ds for a bit longer than 24hrs after birth. I was on magnesium sulfate, so not allowed to walk. In addition, the way the NICU is set up, a gurney wouldn't fit at all. And the nurses weren't willing to strap me into a wheelchair to go either.

My ds also was in the 'lowest' level of NICU were the babies are pretty much stable but I had to go through an elaborate decontamination/sanitization process to see him. I don't know if that could have been done with a wheelchair, for example.

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Wife to dh, Mommy to my heavenly angel, J (06), and my earthly angels, S (07) and E (10)

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#10 of 12 Old 02-20-2010, 01:42 AM
 
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I had a fever when my daughter was born and had to wait for 24 hours after my fever had broken until I could see her. I did have an epidural with her birth, so I know that might have been the cause, but I also came into the hospital originally with a stomach virus or food poisoning and dehydration, so the virus could have caused it. I didn't get to see her until she was 26 hours old, although I held her for just a moment before they took her to the NICU.

As much as I wanted to be with her, I did not want to risk getting my small baby sick, nor any of the other fragile babies in the NICU (some of whom were much, much smaller and sicker than my daughter.) It totally sucked, but I understood the reason behind it.

Hopefully your friend will be able to bring her baby home soon and have all the bonding time she needs.
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#11 of 12 Old 02-21-2010, 02:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Sorry it took me awhile to get back to this! Yes, my friend was too fragile to get down there, and even when she could, she couldn't hold him as he was in some kind of head bubble. Her husband could get to the nursery, but he wasn't there very often, he works all day out of town. But good news! Baby was released today! My friend is so happy to be able to be home with her two year old and her new baby boy!
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#12 of 12 Old 02-21-2010, 11:55 PM
 
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That is very sad, but can happen to any of us. I only got to see my baby within a few hours because I avoided a c-section for my breech. Can't tell you how many times I heard the nurses say to the neonatologist on rounds that "mom hasn't visited--sectioned for breech". the NICU could not accommodate gurneys. So sad. We lent our camera to a dad so he could take a picture to mom once.

4 kids under 10
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