We're ready to start trying natural ways to "encourage" labor, and my cervix isn't fully effaced, so applying prostaglandins is making the most sense. But Daddy & I aren't a couple and impulsive sex between friends is one of those things we promised we wouldn't do again ...
So, assuming the performance anxiety and being treated like a lab rat don't totally kill his mood ... what are some other ways of getting the semen onto my cervix? (yep I can find it).
Ones I've come across so far are:
-- in an Instead cup (but I've never successfully placed these even when not pregnant)
-- in a condom and turn it inside out (but I wonder how much semen would end up on my cervix, and how much further "out")
-- freeze it into "Pop" sicles har-har ... (I'm skeptical this wouldn't change the hormone makeup?)
-- get it into gelatin capsules (come on ... seriously?)
I'm thinking of into a condom, which I snip the tip off of, and cleverly hold closed until just the right spot, then cleverly squeegee out onto just the right spot ... but given the relaxin-induced klutziness I've had lately ...
And please, no "be patient" lectures ... 3 weeks ago it was, "I'd be surprised if the baby doesn't come this week." Having my back adjusted by my osteopath gave me a 2-day break from the painful and unproductive contractions (which come only when I start to sleep deeply). I'm fully exhausted, and have some old myofascial pain syndrome stuff that comes up as weak neck and upper back muscles -- it'll totally suck if by the time I have the baby, I can't hardly hold him or hold myself upright to nurse.
We've passed the due date, I'm whipped, and I'm not far enough for the blue and black cohosh, and other remedies. I'm having the baby at home, and my midwife absolutely does not invade in other ways (no stripping membranes even if I were dilated, no checking my cervix even unless I ask) and is conservative about the cohoshes and stuff.
At least I'm tired enough to find this chapter -- you got him in there, now I need more of the same to get him out ... here's a cup, I left a few of your favorite magazines in the bathroom -- pretty funny.