Feeling really uncomfortable with caregiver... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 03-10-2011, 08:36 PM - Thread Starter
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With dd I had a very positive natural hospital birth, with very supportive drs and nurses.  I had a family dr who was a part of a maternity practice and actually delivered with a random dr who I never met before and I don't know her name, but it was positive none the less.  We have since moved and I really wanted a midwife.  However, I honestly just thought my period was late and by the time I phoned the midwives (3 different practicies, each with 6ish midwives at each) at 5 weeks everyone was booked.  I cannot homebirth as I live 1hr 1/2 from the nearest hospital with maternity care, which I think makes me less appealing to the midwives (they will only homebirth within 45 mins but are willing to take me as a client as I have no choice in how far I have to go for the nearest hospital).  


I have since signed on to a smaller maternity clinic (family drs who specialize in maternity) with only 6 drs rather than the 21 at my last clinic, but for some reason I really don't feel comfortable with them.  There is one other maternity clinic that I could go to but I know it will be big as well.  Where we live now is very not "natural" friendly (no one breastfeeds, has natrual births etc out here, though it is more popular in the city, its still in the margins), and I have not heard very good things about the hospital, especially the quality of the nurses, which in my opinion can make or break your birth.  Oh and I am not driving to another hospital, because that's just way too far.


What I am considering doing is emailing the midwives and telling them that I am feeling uncomfortable with my options for maternity care and seeing how far down on the wait list I am, and if there's any hope of getting in.  Do you think this is bugging them?  Honestly I just want to beg and plead them to take me, but I know that is unreasonable.

Canadian Mama to E 6yrs and I 3 years
Someone new coming August!
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#2 of 8 Old 03-10-2011, 08:47 PM
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If they are seriously booking up by 5wks, you should certainly ask to be put on a waitlist.  As cynical as it may be, reality dictates that they'll have a fair number of dropouts between miscarriages, people risking out, changing minds, etc.  Good luck!

-Shannon, momma to H reading.gif 8/03, N heartbeat.gif 9/06, & P homebirth.jpg 8/11, missing S brokenheart.gif born at 11 wks 1/09 



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#3 of 8 Old 03-10-2011, 09:18 PM
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You are absolutely not bugging them!  Go for it! :-)

- Kim
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#4 of 8 Old 03-10-2011, 10:00 PM
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you definitely won't get in if you don't bug them. and if you don't wind up getting in, who cares if you bug them. that said, you can find a way to bug them as nicely and politely as you possibly can. tell them how it's extenuating circumstances. ask THEM for advice on how you can possibly get in with their practice. good luck!

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#5 of 8 Old 03-11-2011, 08:56 AM
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I would contact them also.  I've heard in my area what kind of a birth you're planning has a bearing on whether they'll take you on as a patient.  Which makes sense if you think about it - if there are a limited number of spots and some women are looking for OB-style care from the MWs then they may as well see an OB, right?  For example my midwifery practice clearly states that they give precedence to mamas planning a homebirth because you can't get that with any other provider.  And even though they book up early they often have spots open later on because some women risk out and transfer their care.  I'd definitely give them a call or visit - I'll cross my fingers for you!

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#6 of 8 Old 03-18-2011, 10:25 AM
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Contact the midwives again!  You still have plenty of time, I hope they can work you in!

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#7 of 8 Old 03-18-2011, 09:24 PM
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A squeaky wheel gets the grease - call them! Some are bound to miscarry or risk out, and you never know until you call if they might have a new opening for you.

CD'ing, homebirthing, milk making school teacher. Supporting my family on my income and trying to get out of debt in 2013!
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#8 of 8 Old 03-20-2011, 05:37 PM
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I would try contacting them and begging.  I switched practices at 37 weeks and initially those the new practice told me that they could not possibly take me.  Luckily my Bradley instrucctor had used them previously and adovcated for me, but they still said too full.  Then I called and spoke directly with one of the midwives.  I explained my situation to her (that the other practice had originally stated the were okay with my natural birth plan, but however seemed to be backing away from that in my recent visits, due to what they felt was an "overly" large baby-which she was, but still)  they agreed to take me and they were wonderful.  Although they were natural birth friendly-that wasn't their only approach.  However when my DD got stuck after 2 hours of pushing and my midwife new exactly had to handle this naturally-had even anticipated and asked for support staff to come in and help in case-I knew that I had made the best decision.  Tthis natural birth would have been impossible without her support because of the size of my daughter (almost 11 pounds).  If I had stayed at the previous practice they would have fought tooth and nail for a c-section and I would have ended up with one at the end when she was stuck, because they wouldn't have known how to handle that.Also I was 2 weeks past my due date and while we discussed induction-no one pressured me to have one.  At the other practice it would have been a cosntant argument-especially b/c of her size-they were already headed in that direction when I left.  

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