How was the birth of your first? - Page 5 - Mothering Forums
View Poll Results: What was your FIRST baby's birth like? (check all that apply)
100% Natural 204 100.00%
IV 102 100.00%
Pitocin (or other contraction stimulant) 83 100.00%
Epidural (or other pain/sleep meds) 92 100.00%
C-Section 39 100.00%
Vacuum 16 100.00%
Forceps 6 75.00%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 8. You may not vote on this poll

First ... 3  4  5 6 
Birth and Beyond > How was the birth of your first?
sunnygir1's Avatar sunnygir1 12:48 PM 05-03-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post

Let me preface this by saying I didnt have time to read the whole post but i thought the poll was not very comprehensive because a natural birth could really be broken down into home birth/UC/midwife assisted etc....just a thought :)


Natural birth can occur in any setting, and with anyone or no one present.  I don't see my hospital births as any less of a natural birth than an unassisted home birth.  I had no interventions.

 



ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 05:29 PM 05-03-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnygir1 View Post




Natural birth can occur in any setting, and with anyone or no one present.  I don't see my hospital births as any less of a natural birth than an unassisted home birth.  I had no interventions.

 

That depends on your definition of "natural". To some people natural means no drugs. To others, it means vaginal. And then to others, natural refers to a natural state of things (without being hooked up to anything or observed and checked by staff, etc.).
 

 


shnitzel's Avatar shnitzel 08:38 PM 05-03-2011

I almost pushed my baby out in the triage waiting room. Nurses told me I had to wait my turn and didn't believe I was having a baby NOW because they had sent me home and hour ago  because I was only at 4 cm so I couldn't be in active labour and I was a first time mother. After some yelling from DH they ran me over to the delivery room where DD slipped right out while I was still fully dressed. Wig and all.


sunnygir1's Avatar sunnygir1 09:19 PM 05-03-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post



That depends on your definition of "natural". To some people natural means no drugs. To others, it means vaginal. And then to others, natural refers to a natural state of things (without being hooked up to anything or observed and checked by staff, etc.).
 

 


Not to be a stick in the mud, but the poll clearly gives "natural" as one option followed by a series of interventions, iv, pitocin, c-section, etc.  I don't see how the location of the birth has much bearing on the question asked by the op.

 

And even if you don't think natural birth can occur in a hospital, I believe it can.  I did it twice, and it was clearly very different from what the interns, doctors, and nurses attending me had experienced.

 


MamaofLiam's Avatar MamaofLiam 09:59 PM 05-03-2011

I agree that natural means no interventions. I don't see how location has any relevance to determining whether or not you gave birth naturally. Birth can happen anywhere... a car, a hospital, an airplane... Heck, I even saw on TV that a woman gave birth in a tree (with flood waters below her) during Hurricane Katrina. That was a pretty amazing story.


ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 06:47 PM 05-04-2011


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnygir1 View Post




Not to be a stick in the mud, but the poll clearly gives "natural" as one option followed by a series of interventions, iv, pitocin, c-section, etc.  I don't see how the location of the birth has much bearing on the question asked by the op.

 

And even if you don't think natural birth can occur in a hospital, I believe it can.  I did it twice, and it was clearly very different from what the interns, doctors, and nurses attending me had experienced.

 



I agree with what you are saying for the sake of this discussion; in fact, "natural" did not even have to be called into question at all. Conversation merely segued into that, and I rolled with it.

 

FWIW, I had one "natural" birth in a hospital too, and it was anything but.

 

As for what Mama of Liam says, birth does indeed happen everywhere, but it's not the location that is so much an issue as it is the circumstances and environment that comes with that location. These things very much play a role in how labor happens for a woman... or, consequently, TO a woman. Then of course, interventions may become "necessary".

 

PS-- I thought labor wasn't really something that happened in planes generally speaking, since women are not advised to air-travel past a certain gestation?


MamaofLiam's Avatar MamaofLiam 08:20 PM 05-04-2011

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post

PS-- I thought labor wasn't really something that happened in planes generally speaking, since women are not advised to air-travel past a certain gestation?


Yeah, you would think so, but I grew up with a girl who's claim to fame was that she was born on an airplane. Everyone in class wanted to know which state she was born over. I think it was OK or TX. Probably doesn't happen too often though.


ZakareyasMama's Avatar ZakareyasMama 02:06 PM 05-06-2011

Wow thanks for all the responses! (I'm the OP) This thread started because I, along with several friends, had planned on intervention-free "natural" births with our first babies but all ended up with some intervention. Though this past week another friend who is in her early 20s had her first baby intervention-free in a hospital (and not one well-known for natural birth!) with the assistance of a doula (same one I had). 

 

I would be fascinated to do some real research into the factors that influence the likelihood of interventions at a birth. Though I do think the setting and the mother's birthing education and mindset influence her birth, there is a lot more that is beyond our control. When I was in labor, I felt bad-- like a failure-- once I started saying "yes" to interventions. But eventually  I realized that once I was in labor, it really wasn't about me any more. It was about having a healthy baby! 

 

Just a side note on the idea of interventions... 

When I first made the poll I didn't think about it, but I used "natural" to mean intervention-free. But really there is a difference. Like some people said, an IV is an intervention, but if it's just fluids, it's "natural" also like black and blue cohosh (which I had) is "natural" but it's definitely an intervention. Hmm...


Jaimee's Avatar Jaimee 04:48 PM 05-06-2011

Another thing to consider is that the population answering your poll is a bit skewed.  :)  The actual numbers for all births in the US, not just first time births are closer to:

 

US Hospital Statistics:

            Cesareans: 32.9% up 60% since 1996 (2009)

            Epidural: 59.9% (2006)

            Vacuum: 3.2% (2008)

            Forceps: 0.7% (2008)

            Induction: 23.1% (2008)

            Augmentation of labor: 19.6% (2006)

            IV Drip: 86%

            EFM: 93%

            Neonatal mortality: .675% (2008)

 

2005 Homebirth Study Stats:

            Transfer rate: 12%

            Epidural: 4.7%

            Caesarean section: 3.7%

            Episiotomy: 2.1%

            Forceps: 1.0%

            Vacuum extraction: 0.6%

            Neonatal mortality: 0.17%


ZakareyasMama's Avatar ZakareyasMama 05:32 PM 05-06-2011

Right but I intentionally wanted to ask other moms who were for the most part like me in planning for an intervention-free birth. (I realize that not everyone here on MDC did, but felt it's safe to assume the majority did!)

 

Thanks for those stats. I would have thought the induction rate to be higher. (My friend who just had her baby had to fight her OB at 39 weeks because they routinely scheduled inductions at 39 weeks!!! If we can say anything about birth it's that NOTHING should be routine!nono.gif


MnMtm's Avatar MnMtm 02:34 PM 05-07-2011

The hospital stats for epidurals is really less than 60%? I find that incredibley surprising. Judging from the people around here, I would've put it more at 95-98%


Turquesa's Avatar Turquesa 03:53 PM 05-07-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by MnMtm View Post

The hospital stats for epidurals is really less than 60%? I find that incredibley surprising. Judging from the people around here, I would've put it more at 95-98%



That's what I'm wondering.  What's the source for these stats?


Turquesa's Avatar Turquesa 03:53 PM 05-07-2011


*Double post*


tourist.'s Avatar tourist. 02:04 PM 05-10-2011

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by MnMtm View Post

The hospital stats for epidurals is really less than 60%? I find that incredibley surprising. Judging from the people around here, I would've put it more at 95-98%



Ditto that.  I attended one of my best friends births and the staff was literally shocked that she gave birth naturally.  Everyone was talking about her and coming to meet her.  It was so strange.  


ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 05:29 PM 05-10-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by ZakareyasMama View Post

Wow thanks for all the responses! (I'm the OP) This thread started because I, along with several friends, had planned on intervention-free "natural" births with our first babies but all ended up with some intervention. Though this past week another friend who is in her early 20s had her first baby intervention-free in a hospital (and not one well-known for natural birth!) with the assistance of a doula (same one I had). 

 

I would be fascinated to do some real research into the factors that influence the likelihood of interventions at a birth. Though I do think the setting and the mother's birthing education and mindset influence her birth, there is a lot more that is beyond our control. When I was in labor, I felt bad-- like a failure-- once I started saying "yes" to interventions. But eventually  I realized that once I was in labor, it really wasn't about me any more. It was about having a healthy baby! 

 

Just a side note on the idea of interventions... 

When I first made the poll I didn't think about it, but I used "natural" to mean intervention-free. But really there is a difference. Like some people said, an IV is an intervention, but if it's just fluids, it's "natural" also like black and blue cohosh (which I had) is "natural" but it's definitely an intervention. Hmm...


Read about the physiology of birth! If you start of just googling that, I bet that will be greatly helpful for you in determining the specific factors in the likelihood of interventions!!! :) <-------------------------- !!!!!

 

You were not a failure. First of all, the setup was probably all wrong, even though you may have tried hard to make it all right. And that would not be your fault... it just is. At some point saying yes to interventions is almost inevitable. For one, the hormonal changes you experience at that time make you more vulnerable and receptive to suggestions. That's just your biology. Secondly, the way we handle birth in general (even with a doula or a midwife in an attempt at a natural method) is not so conducive to saying "no". We have a need to do the right thing as society has laid it out to us, trust our caregivers, be good patients, etc. At some point we feel like they truly know better so saying "no" seems to feel wrong or even taboo for us.

 

A word on "it's not about you anymore, it's about a healthy baby"-- this is a sentiment echoed throughout most of our lives, and if push comes to shove is true. However, this is not always a you vs. the baby thing, or that labor is merely the irrelevant means to an end. Usually a healthy and happy mother and labor equals the best possible outcome for baby, but that gets glossed over in favor of the preferences of others. Plus, if the mother is put through something that doesn't sit well with her (body or soul), that will obviously have an effect on both her and the baby for years to come. In fact, the "it's not about you, it's about the baby" is something so many of us have had to suck up and swallow down in a very hard pill form, while we put on a happy face and act like we were not hurt or scarred by our experiences. I don't think we should be dismissed any more. :) I'm sure our babies wouldn't want that for us, either.

 


philomom's Avatar philomom 05:40 PM 05-10-2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by tourist. View Post

 



Ditto that.  I attended one of my best friends births and the staff was literally shocked that she gave birth naturally.  Everyone was talking about her and coming to meet her.  It was so strange.  


That happened to us and we were in a crunchy little spot in Georgia at the time. One of our best stories about birthing our son was passing this husband of another mother three times in twelve hours. The first time we passed him, I had dropped to all fours in front of the nurse's station. He wished us good luck. The second time we passed him just four hours later he was agog that we had had the baby and were roaming the halls in search of snacks. Then, we saw him walking with his Iv and monitor hooked up wife as we were leaving with baby in our arms. By this time, I had showered, put on earrings and cute dress.. he was literally looking at me with his mouth hanging on the floor while his wife was shooting me daggers with her eyes. At each pass we just smiled politely but it was very telling.

We also had one adorable young nurse who just could not stop complimenting us because she had never seen anyone give birth standing up and no epidural. And I was smiling as I pushed him out... the poor thing was almost silly with gushing about it.
ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 05:54 PM 05-10-2011

I am amazed whenever I hear beautiful hospital birth stories. :)


TCMoulton's Avatar TCMoulton 06:40 PM 05-10-2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post

I am amazed whenever I hear beautiful hospital birth stories. :)



What a strange comment to make. If you were to peruse the birth stories forum you will find many stories of happy, beautiful birth stories that take place in (gasp) a hospital. Just because it isn't your idea of perfect does not make it something that could or should be considered rare.
Bokonon's Avatar Bokonon 06:58 PM 05-10-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by TCMoulton View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post

I am amazed whenever I hear beautiful hospital birth stories. :)





What a strange comment to make. If you were to peruse the birth stories forum you will find many stories of happy, beautiful birth stories that take place in (gasp) a hospital. Just because it isn't your idea of perfect does not make it something that could or should be considered rare.


I wouldn't consider my first c-section "beautiful", but my second was.  It wasn't orgasmic, or empowering, or natural, but having my daughter and hearing her cry almost right away and not having to be taken to the NICU right away like my son had been, even though she was only 34 weeks, was definitely beautiful.

 

It's all relative.


Bokonon's Avatar Bokonon 07:02 PM 05-10-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by MnMtm View Post

The hospital stats for epidurals is really less than 60%? I find that incredibley surprising. Judging from the people around here, I would've put it more at 95-98%



I would guess that stat doesn't include epidurals for c-sections, which would account for over 30%, but that's just my guess.


sunnygir1's Avatar sunnygir1 08:20 PM 05-10-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by TCMoulton View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post

I am amazed whenever I hear beautiful hospital birth stories. :)





What a strange comment to make. If you were to peruse the birth stories forum you will find many stories of happy, beautiful birth stories that take place in (gasp) a hospital. Just because it isn't your idea of perfect does not make it something that could or should be considered rare.

 

I don't think it's such a strange comment.  Many, many women wind up with a birth experience that is not what they want, and that is exacerbated by being in a medicalized environment.  If I hadn't had the support I had with my mother and midwives, and if I hadn't been watchful and very clear about what I wanted, things would have happened that are "routine" in the hospital before I got a chance to refuse them.  I found the staff to be so accustomed to doing things a certain way that they were taken off guard when I asked what they were doing and insisted that they explain to me fully and let me decide each and every step of the way.  Of course, beautiful birth stories occur everywhere, but I would say that a disproportionate number of birth horror stories, or at least not-so-beautiful birth stories occur in hospitals.
 

 


philomom's Avatar philomom 11:58 PM 05-10-2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post

I am amazed whenever I hear beautiful hospital birth stories. :)


I had amazing natural births in the hospital both times. I would never give birth at home. Each family should do what's best for them.
ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 11:21 AM 05-11-2011

TC, what I said wasn't meant to offend. In fact, I just sort of blurted it out, and it was meant actually in kindness. My own personal experience has been that hospital births (mine, most other women I know, and even women I don't know) are seldom described as having been beautiful. In my experience, that does seem rare. So I meant it in a very nice way. I'm pleasantly surprised by truly beautiful hospital births.

 

headscratch.gif


ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 11:26 AM 05-11-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnygir1 View Post



 

I don't think it's such a strange comment.  Many, many women wind up with a birth experience that is not what they want, and that is exacerbated by being in a medicalized environment.  If I hadn't had the support I had with my mother and midwives, and if I hadn't been watchful and very clear about what I wanted, things would have happened that are "routine" in the hospital before I got a chance to refuse them.  I found the staff to be so accustomed to doing things a certain way that they were taken off guard when I asked what they were doing and insisted that they explain to me fully and let me decide each and every step of the way.  Of course, beautiful birth stories occur everywhere, but I would say that a disproportionate number of birth horror stories, or at least not-so-beautiful birth stories occur in hospitals.
 

 


Hmm. I don't think it's so disproportionate. Considering that most births take place in hospitals... and also the nature of a hospital versus other environments... I think the proportions are correct. But I do agree with everything else you said! :)

 


ElizabethE's Avatar ElizabethE 11:27 AM 05-11-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by philomom View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post

I am amazed whenever I hear beautiful hospital birth stories. :)




I had amazing natural births in the hospital both times. I would never give birth at home. Each family should do what's best for them.

I have found that it is very hard to accomplish what you have, so if nothing else, it is a credit to you.
 

 


artekah's Avatar artekah 05:26 PM 05-11-2011
My first was a 100% natural home birth. Awesome in every way!

Planning for another home birth in July.
ZakareyasMama's Avatar ZakareyasMama 05:50 PM 05-11-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post



A word on "it's not about you anymore, it's about a healthy baby"-- this is a sentiment echoed throughout most of our lives, and if push comes to shove is true. However, this is not always a you vs. the baby thing, or that labor is merely the irrelevant means to an end. Usually a healthy and happy mother and labor equals the best possible outcome for baby, but that gets glossed over in favor of the preferences of others. Plus, if the mother is put through something that doesn't sit well with her (body or soul), that will obviously have an effect on both her and the baby for years to come. In fact, the "it's not about you, it's about the baby" is something so many of us have had to suck up and swallow down in a very hard pill form, while we put on a happy face and act like we were not hurt or scarred by our experiences. I don't think we should be dismissed any more. :) I'm sure our babies wouldn't want that for us, either.

 



So what I was thinking of was my own experience... I'd hoped for a water birth. I wanted my son to be placed directly on my chest and to wait for the cord to stop pulsing. I wanted there to be very few people present at the birth and not to be pressured by time. Well... DS had heavy meconium staining so his cord was immediately cut and he was taken to be suctioned by the NICU team that was standing in the room waiting for him to come out. Now, I can be disappointed that I didn't get that perfect postpartum picture of mother and baby or I can be elated that my son was healthy and in my arms within a few minutes. At that moment I would have sacrificed anything of myself for the baby's health. I think that's when I knew I was a mother. 


MnMtm's Avatar MnMtm 12:00 AM 05-13-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizabethE View Post




Read about the physiology of birth! If you start of just googling that, I bet that will be greatly helpful for you in determining the specific factors in the likelihood of interventions!!! :) <-------------------------- !!!!!

 

You were not a failure. First of all, the setup was probably all wrong, even though you may have tried hard to make it all right. And that would not be your fault... it just is. At some point saying yes to interventions is almost inevitable. For one, the hormonal changes you experience at that time make you more vulnerable and receptive to suggestions. That's just your biology. Secondly, the way we handle birth in general (even with a doula or a midwife in an attempt at a natural method) is not so conducive to saying "no". We have a need to do the right thing as society has laid it out to us, trust our caregivers, be good patients, etc. At some point we feel like they truly know better so saying "no" seems to feel wrong or even taboo for us.

 

A word on "it's not about you anymore, it's about a healthy baby"-- this is a sentiment echoed throughout most of our lives, and if push comes to shove is true. However, this is not always a you vs. the baby thing, or that labor is merely the irrelevant means to an end. Usually a healthy and happy mother and labor equals the best possible outcome for baby, but that gets glossed over in favor of the preferences of others. Plus, if the mother is put through something that doesn't sit well with her (body or soul), that will obviously have an effect on both her and the baby for years to come. In fact, the "it's not about you, it's about the baby" is something so many of us have had to suck up and swallow down in a very hard pill form, while we put on a happy face and act like we were not hurt or scarred by our experiences. I don't think we should be dismissed any more. :) I'm sure our babies wouldn't want that for us, either.

 



I always cring when I hear people say, "It's not about you, it's about a healthy baby," or other variations of that because it seems like they think I planned homebirths out of selfishness; putting myself ahead of my child, when just the opposite is true! I do homebirths because I believe it is what is the safest, healthiest option for my children.

 


CI Mama's Avatar CI Mama 01:02 PM 05-13-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by MnMtm View Post





I always cring when I hear people say, "It's not about you, it's about a healthy baby," or other variations of that because it seems like they think I planned homebirths out of selfishness; putting myself ahead of my child, when just the opposite is true! I do homebirths because I believe it is what is the safest, healthiest option for my children.

 

I think it's one of those statements that can mean a variety of things, depending on the context. Some people probably mean it the way that you indicate...others may intend to be supportive or kind. In general, I think it's a bad idea to make this kind of statement about another woman's birth, because you are basically telling her what her birth is supposed to be about. I believe that a woman can and should decide for herself what her birth is about.

 

If I woman wants to say this about her own birth, however, I think that's a totally different story. As a PP mentioned, for some who go through an unexpected or difficult experience, this kind of perspective is helpful. Again, a woman can decide for herself what her birth experience is about.
 

 


hennylou's Avatar hennylou 02:36 PM 05-13-2011

my biggest obstacle in having a natural birth (which annoyingly ended in an c-section) in the hospital was my ob. 

 

the nurses were amazing, so supportive and helpful (and it was christmas eve & christmas day so i went through 7 different nurses as they reduced the staff).  i wish i had switched my ob prior to delivery, but i had a potential complication and it was awkward, i didn't want to offend him, and i though we had a good enough relationship and that it would work, but he thought i was being "brave" and "macho" for wanting a natural birth, i thought he was kind of just teasing me, but sure enough, he wasn't supportive during labor.  no kidding he walked into my room 7 hrs into my 17 hr labor, sat on the stool next to me, took my hand mid contraction and said "oh dear, you are suffering, don't you want an epidural?"  WTF!!!  so condescending and unsupportive! even the nurses were shocked by this.  so ladies, trust your gut, make sure you trust your ob, switch if you don't.


First ... 3  4  5 6 

Up