I'm quite far along, and I know I can go into labor anytime now. I'm seriously afraid of pushing the baby out. During my cervix test, it was extremely painful. I touch down there out of curiousity careful, and notice the entrance is very extremely sore when touched, very tight and tiny, and is probably why it hurt so much.
Could this possibly just mean I'm just not dialated? Or something else? The thought that it being so tight, sore, tiny, and can not even fit a single finger at all made me think maybe I'll end up tearing and it'll be a very painful birth?
Can anyone tell me their thoughts, experiences, advice or such? Anything would be much appreciated, I'm usual the strong type. But this does frighten me, and I only have friends who haven't gone through this going to be besides me. So having no one only increases the fear of pain being way more than I can handle.
Your cervix position right now has absolutely nothing to do with how you will birth your baby, or how (or if!) you'll tear.
Many moms stay high and closed until labor starts. I have had 4 babies, and mine always stays that way until labor day. I haven't torn with my last 3 births. Also, your cervix is usually not where tearing occurs. More often if happens around the lower opening. You can find google pictures of perineums that will show you better.
The best way to avoid tearing is to be upright as much as possible, birth the head and shoulders slowly, and try to stay well-hydrated. Some people recommend oil massages, or warm compresses, as well.
If you enjoy reading, stop by the library and pick up Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. It will give you a good feel of natural birth, and explain what to expect a little better.
Personally, I find that information is the best way to deal with things, and this is a safe place! Ask away!
"If you keep doing the same things you've always done, you'll keep getting the same results you've always gotten."
Relax. Your body was made for this. I'm 33 and TTC, and everything I read says the ideal time for your body to give birth is between 16 and 19. Yes, it's less common in our culture to give birth at your age, but physically, there is nothing wrong with you. The reason your cervix is tiny is that they are - until they dialate during labor. Trying to shove anything in it right now will hurt. (Not to mention puts you at risk for infection, so stop- your mucus plug is there to protect you).
Have you read any natural labor books about not clenching and tightening up during labor? Your cervix is a sphinter (like your anus) and being afraid and clenching down may make it more painful. When the time comes, your body will send out the right signals and the right hormones for things to open up. Go with it and relax and you'll be right where you should be. Try standing, dancing, swaying, etc. to keep things open and don't let them throw you on your back (the worst way to labor). Good luck- you'll be great! I suspect your labor will be a lot better than any of us 30 somethings, LOL. :)
Katie - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13
You can also decline cervical checks. I'm just sayin'. you have choices.
Your body will start to loosen up and get ready to birth that baby when your body and baby is ready. Read read read... Dr. Sears and Ina May Gaskin are great resources.
Oh, Get a Doula. A lot of times you can find some that have community outreach or work in programs to give teen moms access to doula support. So, it would be free or minimal cost. They can help answer your questions, give you support and just be there with you. It sounds like it would be very helpful for you.
I was once in your shoes! Only I was 18 by that time, but 17 when I got pregnant. My best advice would be to read, read, read and do some research. Even though you're 38 weeks, it's not too late to inform yourself of all your options during labor. It's possible that your provider might have "stripped your membranes" (sometimes done to try to induce labor) during the exam, making it more painful than usual. I've had my membranes stripped twice, and both times it hurt a lot and I was sore afterwards. About pushing the baby out - it's ok to be afraid. Who wouldn't be? Just remember, you'll be in a safe place with people to care for you, and you CAN do this. It of course seems very intimidating right now, but when you're ready to go, trust me, you will know what to do.
Bethany, crunchy Christian mom to Destiny (11) Deanna (9), and Ethan (2)