Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Northampton, MA
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I just can't wait to be pregnant again. I fantasize daily about the experience of labor, and imagine what it will be like to give birth vaginally.
I think a lot of my craving is a yearning to heal from my last experience. Does anyone else feel this way?
I had a somewhat difficult twin pregnancy last time, and it was lovely in many ways, but not at all what I had planned for. I wanted a homebirth with a midwife, but couldn't find a midwife who would assist me. Instead I had a very medicalized OB-attended pregnancy that included 6 weeks of bedrest, some depression, and that ended in a scheduled c-section.
I just want to do it all over again. It didn't feel real last time. I feel like I totally missed out.
I still don't have AF back, and am nursing my twins several times a day/night, so don't really expect it back anytime soon. Somedays the pregnancy/baby craving gets so strong that I feel tempted to wean my babies in order to bring back my fertility. I can't imagine actually doing that, but I'm even surprised that I think about it. I want to just feel content with the babies I have.
Mindfully mothering SIX kids (ages 5, 6, 8, 9, 11 & 11) in a small house with a lot of love.