Stalled labor, hypnobirthing, advice needed please! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 04-08-2013, 06:17 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi everyone, I'm 39 weeks pregnant as a surrogate for a wonderful couple, they live about 2 1/2 hours away from me and plan to be part of the birth. I feel like my body is stuck and everyone waiting an anticipating the birth is inhibiting me I think. At my appointment with my midwife last Tuesday I was 4cm and 75% effaced. (wish she hadn't checked and hadn't  told me!)

 My midwife was convinced she'd she me that night, it didn't happen. It didn't happen all week. On Friday I was having a lot of back pain that I never had with my own babies, so I went in for a check and I was at 5cms 100% effaced. Walked the hall for an hour re-check and no progress so I went home. Once I got to sleep I slept though the night. I was fine all day Saturday. Yesterday I woke up from a nap (baby's parents were spending the weekend here and had just gone home) and I was having real contractions every 2-3 minutes. Normally I would have stayed home and labored a bit, but I went in for a check to see if anything was happening, notified baby's parents and they decided to make the trip back. Still the same. Walked for an hour and a half, nothing. Laid down for an hour, nothing.. so I was sent home with a sleeping pill and I slept thought the night, no more contractions. This is a whole new experience for me, I never experienced false labor before. I'm wondering if all of the anticipation about when baby is coming, whether or not baby's parents will make it, being on "stage" for baby's parents... ect,  is making me hold back somehow. I've used all the relaxation techniques I know, and feel like I am relaxed but there must be something keeping this from happening.
Just wanted to know if anyone has experienced this before, I'm trying to just go about my business and not think about baby being born but apparently that is not working.

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#2 of 9 Old 04-08-2013, 06:33 AM
 
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How long did you carry your own babies? Is 39 weeks early for you or is it late?
My DD came at 41weeks 1day and that was with gel induction so for me I'd expect 39 weeks to be early and that maybe the excitement is causing these contractions but baby isn't quite ready so they shut down. I'm due with number 2 in July so this is pure speculation and just something to think about. I hope baby comes soon smile.gif
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#3 of 9 Old 04-08-2013, 06:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My first was born at 38.5 and my second was born at 38.3, so I guess that is partly why there has been so much anticipation. I know I could still have a week or so.

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#4 of 9 Old 04-08-2013, 07:03 AM
 
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Have you discussed going late with your MW? If there's a number like 42w or 41w3d then I'd try to let go of the expectations until close to that date. If your water hasn't broken then baby is well protected despite the dilation as far as I understand. Maybe your babies came earlier because they were ready earlier and your body was more in sync with them, being biologically yours. Perhaps your body is ready to birth but baby isn't ready yet - seems possible as this child is different genetically. So maybe your body starts labour and baby sends a message to stall it since he or she isn't "ripe" yet. Perhaps it is psychological: both of your babies have arrived by now and you're anxious despite doing your best to relax. I'd try to make the MW cutoff as the expectation of birth and anything prior to that is a bonus.
BTW you are amazing for being a surrogate. There is a couple in my extended family that would benefit greatly from surrogacy but I simply am not strong enough to take on that role. You are incredible and what you're doing for this couple is nothing short of a miracle. hug.gif
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#5 of 9 Old 04-08-2013, 09:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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That is a great point, I hadn't thought of it that way and thank you for your kind words smile.gif
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#6 of 9 Old 04-08-2013, 09:47 AM
 
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You know, it is the baby, not you, who decides! Hypnobabies has several lines in their scripts that address this sort of thing, like "Your baby will come at the perfect time. Babies are born on their birthdays and not when doctors decide" are both in the pregnancy affirmations track, I think. They also have a "Baby, come out!" script available to convince the little one to go for it! I'm not familiar with the Hypnobirthing material, but these hypnobabies scripts very well may complement what you already have. smile.gif

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#7 of 9 Old 04-10-2013, 08:06 PM
 
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Do you know what position the baby is in? (Aside from the obvious head-down)


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#8 of 9 Old 04-13-2013, 01:42 PM
 
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I dilated like that with my first 2 boys. Walked around 5 cm for a week at least and was 6-7 cm before labor started. Doesn't mean anything is wrong. :)


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#9 of 9 Old 04-16-2013, 08:59 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by phathui5 View Post

Do you know what position the baby is in? (Aside from the obvious head-down)


I had a month of prodromal labor due to a bad position.....she was completely posterior, and thankfully turned around during labor, but I had 4 weeks of contractions that were 3-7 minutes apart all night long at least 3-4 nights a week. 


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