Csection Support Thread April 2005 (cont discussion from March) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 424 Old 02-24-2005, 07:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi!

This thread is for support only and not to debate the necessity of cesarean birth. This is a place to moan, complain, bitch, mourn, share the joy, thoughtful decision, cesarean birthplans, etc and all are welcome!

I wanted us to keep the same thread going since there is a lot of information here. I have recieved so many PMs from lurkers and other moms on mothering about cesareans and getting support for one that I thought it best we keep it going.

Kim
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#2 of 424 Old 02-24-2005, 07:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thought I would give a brief update!

I am now 21 weeks along. My csection is now scheduled for June 23rd. After much thtought, deliberation and study we felt this was the best time to do it. I am just not willing to chance fate during my last pregnancy. I have horrible adhesions and I can really feel things around my scare as my uterus stretches.
We are excited to be having a girl. Right now she is breech. I imagine if she doesnt get head down she will be breech or transverse for the rest of the way. Right now I can only flipping her in one direction (the septum may be preventing her from going the other way, not sure). My placenta is a great place, and I have not gained any weight thus far. However I am bigger around at 21 weeks than I was at the end of my last few pregnancies. UGH.

I am beginning to write my cbirth plan. I may alter a few things to this one than the last (which can be found in several threads of 2004 under csecion suppot) Also I am trying to get my doc to let a third person be in the OR.

So this thread hasnt been up in several weeks and I have seen several threads about csections before and post partum. Lets get updates from everyone. Don't be a stranger. Momma's here need to know we are around and to offer support.

Kim
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#3 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 11:17 AM
 
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I'll be brave ... I'm 15.5 months pp, and I actually feel great. I have zero adhesion or scar pain, and have regained about 95% of my feeling around the scar. I haven't had any stretching feelings in awhile, even though I carried 25 lbs. ds in his 8 lbs. backpack almost all day on Wednesday. I know I'm very lucky.

In 2 weeks I meet the mw I'm hoping to use for my VBAC whenever we decide to start ttc. I hope it goes well b/c there are only OBs or UC after that. I'm a little nervous that she's hospital based (illegal for MWs to attend HBAC here), and fear my reaction to a hospital environment. I'm going to have to work on those issues when the time comes. If things go well in labor, part of me just wants to have an accidentally-on-purpose UBAC. I think my dh would flip out with that, though. :LOL

Kim ... I'm so glad you're feeling good! Keep us posted. I can't believe you're half-way cooked already!!!

So come on out ladies, where ever you are!
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#4 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 12:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Amy,

What was the reason for your csectoin again? My brains dont work that well and I cant remember.
I think you would be brave to do a UC, I would be scared to do one. If you have a VBAC in the hospital I think maybe visiting the hospital and doing visulation exercises would help.
The hospital I had my oldest in I still have panic attacks when I go in. It was just a really bad experience and its been 8 years.
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#5 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 12:55 PM
 
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Hi,
Its been 6 months PP and I still get sad over my birth expereince. I still feel guilty of what I could have done differently. My scar is itchy. It doesn't hurt anymore, but just uncomfortable.
I too want a VBAC. What is a UBAC?
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#6 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 12:58 PM
 
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I would like to share my birth story. I haven't read it in a long time. It took me the longest time to write it and when I finally did I cried.

I woke up at around 6:15 having contractions. They seemed to be coming at a regular interval. I woke up Fred and we timed them together. They were anywhere from 3 to 8 minutes apart and lasted 30 seconds to over a minute long. The longer apart they were, the longer they were. We practiced some relaxation. I had 2 soft stools. We decided to try to get some sleep just in case they were the real thing. I was able to get some sleep, waking up every 15 minutes with an intense contraction. Fred called our doula and he got up to make breakfast. I got up and used the restroom and saw that I had some bloody mucous! I called our doula and let her know and she said that she would come whenever I wanted. I asked her to come in a couple more hours. By 11:30 when she came, my contractions were coming on strong and regular. We felt that it was still too soon to go the hospital. It wasn't hurting too bad. I was able to talk through some of them. At 5:13 my water broke. It felt weird. I was sitting at the dining room table talking to my doula and all of a sudden a contraction and something kind of sunk in and I felt as though I jumped. All of a sudden: TRICKLE TRICKLE....and it kept coming. I cried becacuse I was kind of embarrased. We went the hospital after that. The nurses were really nice. Unfortunately, my midwife was on vaccation so I had to wait for the OB to get there. Fortunately, he is an advocate of natural childbirth as well. The nurses let me wait for him to do the cervix check. He did not get to the hospital until 7. By then my contractions were really strong. He checked me and I wasn't dialated at all. I screamed afterwards because it caused my contractions to get stronger. I really don't remember how many more times they checked me. I was told that I wasn't allowed to labor in the tub because Desi had passed some meconium. I had to be monitored on the strip every 30 minutes, which I think they allowed me to be mobile for more. By 10 my contractions were getting so strong I couldn't handle it anymore. Fred suggested I take a shower. They allowed me to take a shower in the other room. I labored in the hot shower for almost 2 hours. My doctor wanted to see me at 11 and I had him see me in the bathroom. He saw that I was doing well and allowed me to labor in there longer. Now I know why they say having a water birth is like having an epidural. It felt delcious and I could barely feel the contractions when the hot water hit. I got out at 12. They checked me. I don't remember what I was. Maybe a 2. The contractions were so painful!!!! And I was having a fever. I started shaking violently which made the contractions worse. I know I was begging for an epi at this point or a C sec...but I only did it when the nurse left...so I guess I wanted Fred to talk me out of it. By 4 I still wasn't progressing. I told him that I needed an epi. He tried to talk me out of it, but I told him I couldn't make it. I told him that it depended on the cervix check. They checked me and I was only at 4. I saw that this was going slow so I asked for the epi. My doula had left to nurse her son. When she got back, they were shooting me up. It took a while because I kept having contractions and they had to stop. When the medicine kicked in I felt so much better. The contractions felt as they did earlier in the day. Desi though wasn't doing well. Her heartrate was going way up. They had me lay on one side to get oxyen to her. At some point I had to wear an oxygen mask. think they checked me at 6 and I was only at 5 cm. The nurse said that if I wasn't progressing she would have to give me pitocin. They allowed us to do nipple stimulation with a pump for an hour and a half. Still no progress so they gave me pitocin. The contractations became intense again but I was able to handle it. Shift change and the nurse from hell came. She talked to me as thouhg as I were deaf. She was rough with her cervix checks and had an ugly grimace on her face. She was rude to our family and talked back to my doctor. I felt the urge to push around 9 or so. I was at an 8 I think. At 11 I was finally able to push. My doctor came in and checked to see if I was doing it right. It appeared as thouhgg I was. He left. I pushed for an hour and a half. Everyone was encouraging except for the mean nurse. She kept telling me to do it harder and I felt that I had to listen. After an hour and a Half the doc came back and he said that her head wasn't coming down. He wasn't concern on that and said that I could use forceps or a C sec. We opted for the sec because of my physical state. I still tried to push while they were preparing me for the section. They wheeled me to surgery. And at that point my memory is bad. I know they did the spinal there. My arms started shaking uncontrorably. I heard them say girl or I thought and Fred tried to put Desi in my arms but I was shaking too hard to hold her. I fell asleep. At 2 I woke up. Fred wasn't there, but my doula was there. I fell back asleep and kept waking up to them telling me to relax. I woke up again at 2:30. I was still in the operating room. I wanted to know where my baby was. I was upset that I didn't get to hold her right away. I kept asking for her, but she wasn't there. The nurses kept telling me in a little while, but it wasn't until 4 that I got to hold her in my arms. So there it is.
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#7 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 02:18 PM
 
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I'm just about 10 months postpartum and don't have any lingering issues from my c-section. The scar is still a little numb, of course, but not something I notice much.

One of my good friends is pregnant, and a few of the moms of same age babies in my mom's group are starting to try, or at least thinking about it. Meanwhile, I'm thinking I really might be done with just the one. Things with DH are still rocky (we've been in counseling since before our oops pregnancy) and I can't see adding another complicating factor to our relationship. And I miss my old life a lot sometimes, and at least now I can see light at the end of the tunnel - in another year or two I'll have a lot more flexibility. Add another baby, and that gets a lot longer away. And then there's the fact that we won the baby lottery - DS is a really easy baby (excepting the nightnursing), and I don't think I could cope with a fussy baby - better not to risk fate.

But if I do only have the one, I know I'll always be at least a little sad and regretful about never having experienced labor, let alone delivery. But that's no reason to have another baby.

In any case, I'm getting an IUD on March 7, so no babies anytime in the near future. I'm a little worried about it, since I didn't have a vaginal delivery, I'm guessing it's going to hurt a lot to have it inserted. Anyone have any experience with IUDs?
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#8 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 02:31 PM
 
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I'm so glad you're posting this thread! C-section may not be the best way to give birth but thank God it's available! I wouldn't have any of my 4 kids without medical intervention both in conceiving and giving birth. I labored for my first and made it to 10 cm. but she was moving UP during the contractions. It turns out I have big-headed babies (38+ cm heads) and a fused pelvis which necessitates c-sections unless I have them super early. If I could have had regular delieveries, I definately would have but unfortunately, it's not in the cards for me.

I've come to terms with my 'issue' and have had nothing but wonderful birth experiences and my doctor is an absolute doll - telling me that I can keep going and having more babies even after 4 sections. I know that sometimes sections are done for reasons that are not solid but there are also sections for those like me who really need them!

Ann
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#9 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 03:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Cynthia,

Thanks for sharing your birth story. I am wondering what you think you could have doen differently to avoid the csection. Do you feel at the time you did decide to go with one that for *you* it was necessary? Sometimes necessity for some may be different for others. (like you(general) are exhausted sick and in pain, or medical necessity)
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#10 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 03:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Tammy its so good to hear from you!
I sort afelt like you after my first. (now I am on 4th and last!)
I don't think the IUD will be any different had you had a vaginal birth. Most those I know who have had them, before having children or after with vaginal or csections said the discomfort was minimal. There didn't seem to be a difference as to what kind of delivery they had.
What kind of IUD are you getting?
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#11 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 03:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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WOW Ann! Four cesection! That rocks that you have a doctor who supports you in having more children and more than 3 csections.

Do you get double layered sutures? any advice for moms that would like to have more than 3 csections?
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#12 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 03:24 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OnTheFence
Do you get double layered sutures? any advice for moms that would like to have more than 3 csections?
I don't know what my doctor does but I do know that the doctors assisting all said that my doctor does awesome sections and they've all learned things from him. I don't know if it's a factor of the doctor or my body but with my last pregnancy both the doctor and his partner said that my uterus was perfect and they gave me their blessing to have another one. That made me feel great! Also, my last section was by far my easiest and we even went to Burger King on the way home from the hospital because I was starved (I got out late) and then I did a load of diapers when I got home! LOL!!
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#13 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 05:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by OnTheFence
Cynthia,

Thanks for sharing your birth story. I am wondering what you think you could have doen differently to avoid the csection. Do you feel at the time you did decide to go with one that for *you* it was necessary? Sometimes necessity for some may be different for others. (like you(general) are exhausted sick and in pain, or medical necessity)
I wish I would have stayed home longer. I wished I would have asked the mean nurse to leave. I feel that that all the decisons we made were necessary. I have a high tolerence for pain usuaully. If I were allowed to labor in the tub I don't think I would have made the decision to opt for the epidural. As for the C section I felt that it was best for me and my child. I'm wary of forceps. I rather have damage done to my body then take the risk of hurting her head. Her head wasn't transcending at all. Her head was also going up during contractions too. She was also osterior.
Next time I'm gong to try a home birth . That way the proceduers of the hospital woulnd't be as stressful.
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#14 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 07:05 PM
 
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Hi gals! Good to see this thread again. I am almost 5 weeks PP and had a beautiful baby girl! My second c-birth was so much easier than the first one and a lot of that is due to the advice I got here on this thread and from OTF! Thanks ladies! I am recovering great and have had no real issues with this birth at all! I did feel a lot more this time (had a spinal instead of an epidural) but I it only lasted a while.

My c-section was scheduled for a Tuesday and my water broke at 11pm on the Sunday night before. So I got to experience 3 hours of labor before my very unscheduled c-section at 2am in the morning! I was really happy about going into labor since I was scheduled with ds and never had felt a labor pain! It was painful but did not feel like I had expected it would!

Anyway, I was up and showering by Tuesday morning and have not stopped since! I feel great! The only odd thing is that my right big toe has been a little numb since the birth! I need to ask my doctor about this but feel kind of stupid. It does change the way I lift my foot.

Anyway, I have a beautiful daughter and had a very postive c-birth. Just wanted to let you all know.
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#15 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 08:06 PM
 
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Checking in, too.... I'll be UBACing any day now, just waiting on baby to make up his/her little mind and get busy, lol.

We guesstimated the "due date" to be sometime in the 20s of February - we weren't trying hard (no charting or anything), and I'm still nursing DS, so it's not very exact (which is FINE, b/c especially with a VBAC, time pressure is unnecessary and unappreciated). Lately, I've decided that this baby won't be born until March - that way if it comes earlier it's a pleasant surprise, and if it waits til March, I'm not disappointed. Works for me.....


I don't know if anyone remembers, but DS' c/s was VERY hard for me to accept, and I do still feel it was unnecessary. B/c of this, I was VERY prepared when it came time to interview care providers for this pregnancy. I knew what *I* would need for a successful VBAC (or at least to accept another c/s if it was TRULY necessary). I just was not able to find a medical professional who could provide those things to me. I have only two options in our town, so after interviewing both of them, it was pretty clear that UC was the only option left.


My mom has been here for a week now, and we're all just waiting. Right now, I am so VERY glad I decided to go UC, b/c otherwise the pressure would be ridiculous. The OB I interviewed tried to put my "due date" at Feb 13 (which I flat out refused), and the midwife I saw reluctanctly agreed to put it somewhere between the 15th and the 20th. So either way, I would now be "overdue", and under pressure to schedule a c/s - all based on a GUESSTIMATE!!!! Craziness.....


This pregnancy has been helpful in my healing from DS' c/s. I've known for quite a while what I would do differently (if that magic fairy waved her wand and gave me another chance at DS' birth), and what OTHERS should have done differently as well. I have been able to be much stronger this time around in asserting my wishes, and I have gained more confidence in my body's and my baby's ability to know what is best. At first, I really "needed" this baby to be another twelve-pounder, so that I could "prove" that DS' c/s was unnecessary, but lately I've been able to let that go and just prepare for the baby in its own right (now, given the choice, I still would choose to have another twelve-pounder, but I'll be okay if the baby's smaller than that - good thing, b/c it's not my choice, lol!).


I'm excited to experience how my body labors when left ALONE - DS' birth was full of unwanted, unnecessary interventions, so I have no clue what a "normal" labor is for me.

All in all, I'm excited to have this baby, and glad to be doing it without outside pressure.


Kinsey
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#16 of 424 Old 02-25-2005, 10:52 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OnTheFence
Tammy its so good to hear from you!
I sort afelt like you after my first. (now I am on 4th and last!)
I don't think the IUD will be any different had you had a vaginal birth. Most those I know who have had them, before having children or after with vaginal or csections said the discomfort was minimal. There didn't seem to be a difference as to what kind of delivery they had.
What kind of IUD are you getting?
4, huh? I just don't see that happening!! But one never knows...

I hate hormones, so I'm just getting the plain old copper IUD (paragard?) - speaking of which, I need to call my doctor and make sure they know that's what I'm wanting - they didn't ask when I made the appointment, and I need to make sure they have the right thing on hand. I had to wait 6 weeks for the appointment - I don't want to have to wait again!

They like to do the insertion when you're menstruating, but I still have lactational amennorhea, so no period yet for me. I'm definitely not missing tha part of my pre-baby life.
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#17 of 424 Old 02-26-2005, 01:50 AM
 
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What is a UBAC?
Its wonderful to find support in each other. I'm glad I found this board.
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#18 of 424 Old 02-26-2005, 02:17 AM
 
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Hi! I posted on the last few threads and was actually looking for this thread yesterday. I will be 35 weeks tomarrow! My third sec is sheduled for March 22 (38 weeks 4 days), but I don't know if I will make it that far. I have PIH, so we are just taking it week by week. I had the steriod shots at 32 weeks, so hopefully baby will be fine if she has to come early. I had PIH with my last and made it to 37 weeks, so hopefull I will make it at least that far.

I am feeling pretty good. Some streching and touging around my scar, but nothing too painfull. This baby is breach and transverse (which is killing my hips). She spend 3 days of the last 6 weeks head down and doc was she she would stay, because she was so low, but she did not! She is constantly flipping around, like she can't quite get comfortable.

I have had several dreams about having this baby UBAC (unassisted). This would not bother me at all, but dh is freaked out! . We live over an hour from the hospital, so if I had a fast labor it is possible. I am still debating over what to do if I actually do go into labor. I am comfortable having this baby at home and our cattle manager has delivered thousands of calves and he can be here in min if I need him (He is a very close friend and I trust him with my life). The only problem I can see is if someone calls 911, the ambulance comes from 45 min away and the small county hospital that I will NOT go to (we have EMTs closer, but no transport). I would have to drive or have someone drive me to the town hospital.

Sorry this is long and rambly, dh is working late and the girls are asleep

Hope you all have a great weekend!

belly.gifSAHM, carseat geek, cattle raising woman to 5 girls (15, 10, 8, 6, 2) wild.gifand a stork-suprise.gif due in July!
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#19 of 424 Old 02-26-2005, 12:14 PM
 
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Thanks for reviving this thread!

I am not quite 4 months out from a VBAC that wasn't. Physically I am feeling quite back to normal, but emotionally I have my ups and downs about it. Someday I will post my whole birth story, but suffice it to say that I got wonderful care during my pregnancy and delivery, and am about 99% sure that my c-sec was unaviodable. I had a long but beautiful, supported natural labor with three hours of pushing...I had no interventions until my anesthesia for the surgery. My dd was born healthy and alert and calm and is such a joy to me. Sometimes I feel very at peace with the whole thing, and often when I am holding my beautiful cooing girl the fact that she was born surgically seems entirely irrelevant. But sometimes I feel just a sharp pang of grief and regret at the vaginal birth that almost was and that I'm not likely to ever experience.

Gotta run, glad to have this support network revived.
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#20 of 424 Old 02-26-2005, 05:03 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by veganbaby
What is a UBAC?
It is a VBAC at home with no birth attendants -- meaning, no formal birth attendants like drs., mws, doulas, or others. Typically, just mom, dad, and maybe a few close, trusted friends and family. The U stands for unassisted. Check out the Unassisted Childbirth forum here at MDC to get a better understanding.

HTH!

OTF ... my c/s was for FTP basically, which we all know is a load of poop in most instances. I was in labor for 22 hours, pushed for 2+, hadn't eaten in about 26 hours, and hadn't slept in close to 36. DS was posterier and wouldn't move past about +2 station (or wherever your pubic bone is). My water broke on its own at home about 11 hours into my erratic labor and my contractions were never textbook normal and regular (but probably that's just the way my body labors). When I got to the hospital (I went too early, IMO, but I was having transition symptoms, so what did I know), I was only 3 cms, but with broken waters, they admitted me, told me baby was too high to let me walk around, and I risked cord prolapse (have now learned that the risk of cord prolapse was greatest before my water broke and since it didn't prolapse at that time, it probably wasn't going to -- so this was a litigation based medical decision IMO). So they put me pretty flat in bed, on my back, hooked me up to everything, and I labored for a few more hours with awful back labor (due to posterior -- which they didn't tell me until I started pushing), and finally consented to an epidural b/c I was so miserable and felt so defeated (and was so tired from lack of sleep, food, and water). I should've had them check dilation before the epi. b/c they checked me right after and I was 7cm, so I think had I known that, I would've been able to see my way through to 10cm. That would've given me much greater movement while pushing (I couldn't get to a squat although I somehow made it to hands & knees), and I think might've helped dislodge ds who was apparently stuck behind my pubic bone (he had a nasty bruise on his forehead). It is all a guessing game, and the c/s might've been inevitable anyway, but I wonder about whether my being able to move in labor would've helped ds turn into a better position and/or whether being able to move more might've helped me get into some better positions for pushing. DS wasn't particularly big so that was clearly not an issue. We consented to the c/s after 2+ hours of pushing b/c I was tired, hungry, defeated, and they were telling us ds was starting to have some questionable decels (further review of records and discussions with the wonderful mamas on MDC have helped me to understand that they were normal, reactive decels), so we decided to avoid an emergency and just go through with it. With everything that had happened up to that moment, it seemed necessary, but in retrospect and with more information than I was told at the time and with clarification of all the misinformation, I think the c/s was really unnecessary.

As for hospitals ... I will not go to a provider who delivers at ds's hospital. I can't even drive in the vicinity of the hospital without having heart palpitations. If I go with a hospital birth, it will be at the most baby-mama friendly hospital in our area, and I have visited many, many people hospitalized there. I am very familiar with the hospital and do not have as many bad feelings about it. Nevertheless, I am staying as far away from there while in labor as possible, hiring a doula (I'm actually looking for a monitrice), and not going (if at all) until I'm in transition (it is a 12 minute drive in traffic). I refuse to be kept in a bed, which will inevitably happen b/c I'm a VBAC. Honestly, I want to have the next baby at home, I'm just not sure it is a reality unless I go UBAC. And as I said before, I seriously doubt my dh would consent to a planned UBAC, but an "accidentally-on-purpose" one might work. I can be pretty stubborn when I don't want something (like to leave to go to the hospital).

Anyway ... I've long enough. It is good to see and hear from everyone about their stories and recoveries!
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#21 of 424 Old 02-26-2005, 05:31 PM
 
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Hi Ladies!
I am going to join you- I have enjoyed reading your stories. I am 10 months pp with my DS. I had an unexpected c-section. Everything went normally for me during my labour. I had great care for the first 12 hours but the last hours of labour I had horrible nurses. The last one kept yelling at me that I wasn't trying hard enough to have the baby! The nurses stood over me and talked about my condition like I wasn't there. My had broke at 7:15 am, I was in full labour by 4:00pm but they didn't let me push until 9:00pm. By 11:30 I had gone nowhere. DS was unable to engage into the birth canal. The mean nurse said that we were going to have to do vacuum extraction but that I was going to have to push harder than I was. I started to cry because I was exhausted. The OB was really nice and told me that we could do an extraction but a c-section would be better. We went with the c-section and when he was born we found out why he could not engage- DS weighed in at 11 ls. 2oz! The OB told me that if we had tried anything but a c-section that both DS and I would have been severely damaged. It was good that I had the c-section but it has taken along time for me to be comfortable with the decision.

Sorry for the ramble but this is the first time that I have shared my story outside of close friends.

Mama to two loqacious and bouncy boys.
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#22 of 424 Old 02-27-2005, 04:28 PM
 
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Hi everyone, I posted this in TAO for the traffic and someone suggested I post it here as well. I'm hoping some of you can provide some insight into these post c-section health problems.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I need some opinions and help on a health problem I'm dealing with. It's really stressing me out and upsetting me.
5 weeks ago I had a planned c-section due to pre-eclampsia and severe arthritis in my hips. My recovery was awsome, I was up and walking around with no pain meds whatsoever the next day. In the following couple weeks the only time I needed any pain meds was if I had overdone things. I had sex at only 17 days pp with no pain. My bleeding had all but stopped at that point as well.
Starting 2 weeks ago, I was feeling some pain on the left side about 2" above my incision. Went to the doctor and she put me on antibiotics as I had a previous uterine infection after a d&c (arthritis had me on prednisone through all 4 pregnancies which does leave me more prone to infection) She told me to call her on the weekend if there was not significant improvement. Sat morning she added cipro as I called to say that while there was no improvement I also wasn't any worse. Sunday was a busy day as we went to a baby shower for my dd, on the way home I had to pull over as I had horrible stabbing pains, I made it to a coffee shop with a bathroom and there passed a clot the size of a baseball, the pain temporarily subsided and I continued home but over the next couple hours it got really bad again. I called my OB and she had me come right in to the hospital. She started me on IV antibiotics, pain meds and wanted to admit me, they arranged for the baby to be admitted with me so I agreed, the next day I had an u/s which was normal. If my abdomen is palpated there is a very painful spot (left side just above incision) She had a surgeon see me the next day and he ordered a cat scan, that too was normal, although I am allergic to the dye used so it wasn't as complete as we'd have liked. He arranged for an internist to have a look at me.
At this point I was becoming very frustrated with being in this much pain and having no answers and was getting very teary, of course when the tears started all the nurses (OBS ward) figured it was PPD--I admit I was getting depressed but none of it had anything to do with the baby--just with being in this much pain and not having any answers.
I opted on Friday for release with no answers as I found everyone around me was handling me with kid gloves, I got the impression they felt since they could find no physical signs it had to just be in my head (doctor denied this, but honestly I don't believe her) Every time they would come in to talk to me, I would start crying mainly because I didn't feel they were listening to me--this of course just added proof to their PPD diagnosis.

So my question.... I'm still very convinced there is something wrong that just hasn't been found as yet, anyone have any ideas as to what it could be???
Oh and one more thing--I've been horribly constipated since the pain started and the only way I've been able to have a bowel movement is with the help of an enema or suppository, oral laxatives and diet do absolutely NOTHING.

I do not believe I have PPD, I took the internet test and scored at 38, I don't deny being depressed though, just I don't think it has anything to do with the baby, she brings me such joy and comfort and I can't get enough of her sweet little face.

Ideas--Anyone????
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#23 of 424 Old 02-28-2005, 11:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Shannon,

It very well may be adhesions. And there really isnt anything you can do about it. Also not to scold, but its very possible you have over done things, causing tearing and improper healing. There is a reason they say no sex for at least 4 weeks and preferrable to wait 6. You are suppose to be resting for those first six weeks, lifting nothing more than your baby for 4-6 weeks, at least no driving for 2 weeks. This means no heavy laundry or running around the house too. You need to be more or less a couch potato. The reason is may hurt on one side more than the other is because of how they pulled your baby out of the incision. It is common for some to have this feeling on one side and to have more adhesions on one side.
Just to remind you, you did have major abdominal surgery! I know its hard to see it that way when you have a cute baby to look after and others to take care of, but you have to give. Unfortunately not taking it easy can cause problems, longer healing time, adhesions and even a hernia in the incision area.
My advice to you at this point since nothing was found in your testing is TAKE IT EASY. Lift nothing heavier than your baby. Don't stand on your feet for long periods of time. Don't lift laundry baskets or wet laundry. Try to sit on your hiney and rest. Ask for help as often as you need it (which is probably more than you are asking now!), and accept that for a period of time you may need to lesson your ideals of how things should be and just focus on healing and resting for right now. Down the road things will come back together.
If in another 6-8 weeks you are still in pain after doing the above, You may want to see someone else or see an internist. You could have a hernia, however I think what could be the problem is not following the standard of care after major abdominal surgery.

Keep us updated!
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#24 of 424 Old 03-01-2005, 02:09 PM
 
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Yeah, I was afraid I'd just overdone things, I guess when you suddenly feel so much better, even with major surgery than you've felt for literally months...it's hard to keep things still I did get a call this morning from my ob and she sent my U/S and cat scan to another doc for his opinion, anyway, I have a clotting disorder that had me on heparin throughout my pregnancy, they think that there may actually be a clot in my left fallopian tube, there is indeed decreased blood flow so I've been started on therapuetic levels of heparin again in hopes that we see an improvement soon.
Wish me luck--in the meantime, this kind of pain pretty much assures I'm taking it very easy!!
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#25 of 424 Old 03-02-2005, 02:00 AM
 
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hi all 4.5 months PP here. quick recap: i had about 28 hours natural labor, then a necessary cesarean (she was hung up on a short cord wrapped twice around her neck, didn't start distressing until hour 29). i had two doulas and my husband with me, and a very supportive pair of labor nurses. i loved the labor, it hurt of course but it was such a primal, beautiful experience. and i can't regret the c-birth knowing it was so absolutely necessary in our case.

i love my daughter like i've never loved anyone before ... but i can tell the bonding doesn't go both ways with us. we lost breastfeeding in her fourth week, because of my medical problems and medications, and i think that's a major part of it. there's this huge "disconnect" between us ... i was in labor, we were dancing together, then boom, she was gone and out of me. no natural transition of things, you know? and now, she's hungry, she gets a bottle, again something artificial is between us. no matter how lovingly i bottle-nurse her, nothing can get close to breastfeeding bonding.

she smiles at me, i'm starting to notice sort of an "i love you"-ish look in her eyes once in a while, but honestly she smiles at everybody and loves it when anybody picks her up. she shows no preference for me at all. i have no idea if that's a bonding issue with us ... or does it mean that because i've always been there for her, she feels secure in other people's arms knowing i'll be there again? all i know is, i read about how other babies cry to be in their mama's arms, and my daughter doesn't do that. so i have no idea if it was the c-birth and not breastfeeding that's causing that to happen, or if it could just be her temperament. i just keep holding her and loving her and gazing deeply into her eyes and talking to her, i feel so incredibly connected to her, i am just dying to feel that connection go both ways.

my adhesions are OW OW OW! i'm finding that i can't get back to normal functioning, like i can't bend to lift or clean, and even holding Willow is hard sometimes. i keep propping us up in a nest of blankets and pillows to stay comfy. i worry about when she starts skootching or crawling, my ability to crawl with her or pick her up, my belly feels like it's ripping open again and again. i know i overdo it, i'm just one of those people who can't sit still, you know? still no feeling at the scar, it's totally numb inside and out, all the pain is above and to the right.

have your c-births caused any delayed bonding, or bonding problems, for you and your babes?

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#26 of 424 Old 03-02-2005, 10:40 AM
 
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Melllybean, I also worried so much about our bonding, since I was given general anesthesia and I never saw my DD until she was three hours old, and since we also had very serious problems learning to breastfeed, and never did succeed. DD spent those first few hours under lights with DH holding her, and sometimes I feel jealous because I think she is more bonded to him. Honestly, my DD showed no preference for anyone during the early months, and was largely only interested in eating, sleeping, and staring at the black-and-white curtain in my bedroom. But now that she is six months old, she shows a definite preference for me and DH, and I feel more rewarded and more like we've really connected. I say give it time, and patience, and continue to be there for her. It will feel rather one-sided until your DD gets a little older.

I can totally relate to the breastfeeding problems. DD was severely lethargic for her whole first week, due to jaundice and the effects of my general anesthetic. She latched on well during the first few days, and then there was a whole lot of hoopla about her kidneys not functioning properly and some nurse gave her a bottle, and she never latched on again. I pumped for two months and then gave up in exhaustian because she still wouldn't latch after a million different strategies and attempts, I couldn't keep up a supply with the pump, and I was starting to resent her for putting me through all that. It was incredibly sad, and I definitely regret it for the bonding experience I feel I missed, but honestly i don't think DD cares at all.

Be patient with yourself! Give it time, find ways to spend close time with her, and it will come!

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#27 of 424 Old 03-02-2005, 10:49 AM
 
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Hi all. I just talked a lot in the previous post and I never actually introduced myself. I'm mama to 6 month old Julia, who was born by emergency c-section after a high risk pregnancy and 27 hours of labor. I have a lot of bitter feelings about my c-section, and I spend a lot of time going over it in my mind and trying to work out what went wrong and how I could have prevented it, and I'm having trouble coming to terms with the fact that there really isn't anything I could have done.

I was high risk to begin with because I have a heart condition that caused Julia to also be tachycardic in utero. Also, my uterus was already not intact because of scarring from a D& C I had after an incomplete miscarriage a few years ago, and the scarring had caused what's called a synechia inside the amniotic sac (something like adhesions) which was blocking DD from descending during birth. My water broke before labor started, and I labored 27 hours before I developed a high fever and DD's heartrate became erratic. Turns out she was entangled in the synechia and couldn't descend, and I was developing an infection. I got to 8 cm and stayed there for four hours, and eventually the problems just escalated to the point that we decided to do a section.

DH thinks that if I hadn't refused pitocin, I might have fully dilated sooner, but I don't see how that would have helped the entanglement. When I look at the whole thing objectively, I see that there really was nothing I could have done, and that we're incredibly lucky that the technology existed to help Julia. But I can't help feeling bitter, especially because of the resulting breastfeeding problems (see above post) and because I am very clearly NOT a good candidate for VBAC, so I will have to go through another section if I want another baby, which I do.

I try and just concentrate on the fact that Julia is healthy and happy and thriving, and forget everything else.

Anyway, it's really nice to see this thread. Sometimes i feel really left out and dejected among all the homebirths and natural births around here...

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#28 of 424 Old 03-02-2005, 01:00 PM
 
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Wow, a lot of you all are pregnant again! I didn't notice that on the last thread. I guess I'm not paying good attention since some of you are pretty far along. :LOL Congrats!

Things have been crazy here-fil had quintuple bypass surgery, we lost our house and are moving in with the il's, I'm finishing my last 2 classes-so I haven't been able to keep up on the thread.

I can honestly say that I have zero regret or guilt about having a c-section. Ds was malpositioned (had been transverse for months) and never engaged. We went to 43 weeks and tried everything-chiropractic, herbs, moxa, accupuncture, everything I'd ever heard of-to get him to turn and nothing did. I had an incredible surgeon, a speedy recovery, and I never experience pain or numbness. The scar is microscopic. I went through all the normal feelings of "what if" for a couple of months after his birth, but then they just faded away. I will have a c-section again if I ever get pregnant again.

I do have a ? though. Has anyone experienced fluttery feelings that feel exactly like a baby kicking them? Anyone that isn't pregnant, that is? This started last night and it is freaking me out. I'm definitely not preg. I can't believe it's been almost a year since ds was born!

Thanks Kim for always starting this thread. It is very valuable for us to know that other AP Mamas do have c-sections, even *gasp* by choice.
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#29 of 424 Old 03-02-2005, 01:20 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mellybean
i have no idea if it was the c-birth and not breastfeeding that's causing that to happen, or if it could just be her temperament. i just keep holding her and loving her and gazing deeply into her eyes and talking to her, i feel so incredibly connected to her, i am just dying to feel that connection go both ways....
have your c-births caused any delayed bonding, or bonding problems, for you and your babes?
Melly, in retrospect I would say much the same thing about my first dd (now almost 4)...we had a pretty traumatic birth with c-sec, she was in the NICU, we had lots of nursing problems...but I'd have to say that I still think it was more about her temperment/personality than anything else. It took me a long time to feel like I was getting much back from her other than a desperate need to nurse at times, but this never felt much like love. My new dd (also a c-sec) came out of the womb gazing up at me adoringly, go figure.

Consider the up-side, though....I can't even leave the house w/o dd #2..whereas with dd #1 was always pretty content without me as long as she wasn't hungry.

That being said, I have a wonderful close totally bonded relationship with my older daughter. Really, we couldn't be closer. I just think the timetable is different for different babies. Try not to worry--you WILL feel all those things coming back at you..it just might take a little time.
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#30 of 424 Old 03-02-2005, 01:37 PM
 
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Rachel -

I also get the same flutters in my tummy and think that if I were really early pregnant, I'd think it was the baby! LOL! I guess it's just muscle spasms but it definately makes me remember my babies kicking.

As for the not bonding issue, I've had good bonding with all of my babies even with the sections. My first ended up being bottlefed - not due to the section or anything but due to the fact that she has neurological issues and just couldn't latch on. She had a rough time on the bottle too (it would take her an hour and a half to drink a few oz.) and as she got older, she needed extensive speech therapy and still, at almost 15, has 'mouth issues'. I also was not an AP parent with her but I definately bonded with her. I was able to nurse her in the recovery room and had her most of the time in my bed with me. All of my kids were nursed within a few hours of birth - the second was the longest time after birth because they had to cut through the placenta to get her and I bled a LOT so they wanted me to be watched a while without the baby. She went on to nurse for 12 months, my 3rd went 20 months and my 4th weaned at 23 months. I co-slept with them and definately bonded with each one fully despite the section. I know that there's something special I missed by not having them vaginally but I guess my approach to the birth made it that it didn't affect us much.

It's tough when you have a vision of a perfect natural birth and end up with lots of intervention but many times it's so necessary. If you've done all you could and it was dangerous for you to not have a section, you did the best you possibly could and you'd be dead if it were another time in history! I just keep thanking God for the technology we have today that I am able to be a mama to 4 beautiful children when there's no way I could have a vaginal birth. I just really feel blessed.
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