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Birth and Beyond > What is the most outrageous thing someone has said...
crazy_eights's Avatar crazy_eights 09:38 PM 04-20-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by doctorjen
After the meconium scare for myself, I talked with a couple different experienced ultrasonographers about this. Apparently, particulate meconium can make the fluid appear more, well, particulate, on ultrasound - but so can vernix, and vernix is far more likely. The head of MFM where I trained said he would never make such a diagnosis or suggest such a thing. Regardless, meconium is sort of a non-issue unless something else is going on.
That was sort of what I suspected. They had told this woman they could see particles and I asked 'how do they know it's not vernix?' Also mentioned that mec in and of itself is a non-issue. I sort of felt like this OB was taking advantage of this woman's fear from the prior stillbirth. She did wind up with a natural delivery though.

Quote:
This resident made a big point of telling me the baby was "at least 8 1/2 lb" which at the time scared me - my previous biggest baby was 7 lbs 11 oz, and I pushed for 2 hours with him. I actually really enjoyed this labor once I got rid of the residents, but I spent a lot of time thinking about my meconium stained, giant baby in there while laboring.
I can't tell you the number of women that come in b/c of u/s at term for either induction or c/sec b/c of a large estimated fetal weight that wind up with a totally normal sized infant. My own SIL had an elective primary c/sec based on u/s that showed a 'macrosomic infant' and she had a diagnosis of gestational diabetes, so she had been told all kinds of worst case scenarios by her OB (SHOULDER DYSTOCIA! ERB'S PALSY! FETAL DEMISE! you name it). Her 'huge' baby wound up being 6-12. And she lives in an area where those who will do a VBAC are few and far between .

Greensleeves's Avatar Greensleeves 02:23 AM 04-21-2005
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chasmyn's Avatar chasmyn 05:34 AM 04-21-2005
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andreac's Avatar andreac 10:11 AM 04-21-2005
A good friend of mine who is pg w/twins was telling me about her hospital birthing class. The nurse was talking about how great the epidurlal is then actually had the nerve to tell a class full of pg women, whom she is supposed to be educating(!!!) that the "BEST" thing is to be induced, becuase they can do the epidural before they start the pit and the then "you don't have to feel a thing" :Puke That nurse should have her liscence revoked
crazy_eights's Avatar crazy_eights 01:08 PM 04-21-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by andreac
The nurse was talking about how great the epidurlal is then actually had the nerve to tell a class full of pg women, whom she is supposed to be educating(!!!) that the "BEST" thing is to be induced, becuase they can do the epidural before they start the pit and the then "you don't have to feel a thing" :Puke That nurse should have her liscence revoked
Talk about an invitation to 'failure to progress'!
AnnMarie's Avatar AnnMarie 01:53 PM 04-21-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by applejuice
A friend of mine was told by her doctor that he would sew her up nice and tight so that, "...She would not be flapping in the breeze..."

:Puke With my first the male doctor and my boyfriend were talking about sewing me up tight. :
2+twins's Avatar 2+twins 03:19 PM 04-21-2005
My dd's - especially the first - look just like dh. After my first, my inlaws said several times in front of me to friends of theirs (and these are normally very cool people), "Well, there's no question who the father is!" Was there any question about it before???? :
AnnMarie's Avatar AnnMarie 04:08 PM 04-21-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by love_homebirthing
My dd's - especially the first - look just like dh. After my first, my inlaws said several times in front of me to friends of theirs (and these are normally very cool people), "Well, there's no question who the father is!" Was there any question about it before???? :
Reading all these posts is bringing bad back memories. :LOL With my last my SIL asked me if it was her brother's child. : I had NEVER even cheated on him for crying out loud. I guess she had asked because we had a period of three years where we weren't together (Before we got married.) and I was engaged to someone else and pregnant (He just stopped talking to me one day during my pregnancy so we had been apart for over a year when her brother and I got back together.), then her brother and I got back together shortly after my son was born. But still, we were a couple, planning on getting married, and of course it was his child. :

I lost my first child at 12 weeks pregnant and my neighbor said to my Mom, "I hope she learned her lesson." :

My Mom wouldn't give me a babyshower with my first daughter because, "Nobody would come." (Because the baby's father wasn't white.).
Full Heart's Avatar Full Heart 05:01 PM 04-21-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by love_homebirthing
My dd's - especially the first - look just like dh. After my first, my inlaws said several times in front of me to friends of theirs (and these are normally very cool people), "Well, there's no question who the father is!" Was there any question about it before???? :
My ils say that all the time .

My sil's kids are from a previous marriage. bil basically raised them from the time they were 2 and 2 mos old though. They have tried to get pg for years and have had 3 losses. When I was pg with one of my kids ils said, " Oh another real xxxxxx (our last name)" Talk about mean spirited!

Michelle
NoraB's Avatar NoraB 09:28 PM 04-21-2005
When we announced our pregnancy, FIL asked, "If it's a boy are you going to close up shop?"

I said, "NOpe. We have to catch up w/ that Arkansas family that has 14 kids." Heh heh heh.
wendy1221's Avatar wendy1221 10:36 PM 04-21-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by Full Heart
My ils say that all the time .

My sil's kids are from a previous marriage. bil basically raised them from the time they were 2 and 2 mos old though. They have tried to get pg for years and have had 3 losses. When I was pg with one of my kids ils said, " Oh another real xxxxxx (our last name)" Talk about mean spirited!

Michelle
That's really awful! My ds turned 3 a few days before dh and I got married. After dh and I were married, I overheard my MIL telling people that she had a new DIL AND a randchild. She was so excited to be a grandma. She sent cards for every special ocasion since our marriage adressed o my ds as her grandson. Now we get cards addressed to the grandkids. LOL! That's the way it should be. I think she cried when we told her dh was adopting ds and we were going to change his last name. FIL isn't quite as open, but he doesn't treast ds1 any differently thatn ds2 and even asks him if he wants to sit w/ grandpa when we visit. They both would love it if ds would call them grandma and grandpa, but he won't for some reason. He loves them, they're great, but he won't call them anything but Rosemary and Walt.
Thalia's Avatar Thalia 12:49 PM 04-22-2005
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pamamidwife's Avatar pamamidwife 12:56 PM 04-22-2005
a friend, who had just had a baby, told me when I was six months pregnant:

"Oh, LOVE the episiotomy! The episiotomy is YOUR FRIEND!!"

With "friends" like that, who needs enemies??
calebsmama03's Avatar calebsmama03 01:32 PM 04-22-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by Galatea
From a sOB:

"I could not do an episiotomy, but then your labia would rip off."

We went to the midwives that same day.
My best friend's sOB told her that if she didn't get an episiotomy she'd lose all bladder control and never be abe to pee normally again. Sad thing is, she is so mainstream that she believed him!! Then when she had a more moderate OB for her delivery that DIDN"T do the episiotomy she was actually MAD at her!!!! So sad the crap they feed to women that they actually believe
neveryoumindthere's Avatar neveryoumindthere 02:30 PM 04-22-2005
while in labour the nurse kept asking me if i wanted the epidural (though i had about 5 copies of my birth plan stating that NO ONE even ASK me and if i wanted it i'd ask myself) and i kept refusing and then she said "you know, you dont have to be a MARTYR"
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brusselsprout's Avatar brusselsprout 08:57 PM 04-22-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2six
That is so strange. I got a call from a woman a few weeks ago - she had had 5 normal pregnancies and then a stillbirth at 35 weeks for no apparent reason. Her OB was anxious to induce her at 38 weeks b/c of the prior stillbirth. She refused. So at 40 weeks they do a BPP and tell her that she MUST be induced (but not for 2 days when they can get her on the schedule) b/c on u/s they can see 'there is meconium in the fluid'. I said I had never, EVER heard of such a thing while working almost 5 years in L&D. I really thought it sounded bogus. Anyway, she went in for induction - which they began by rupturing her membranes and releasing totally CLEAR fluid. Is this some new idiot trend? "we can see mec on u/s"?
I haven't finished reading the thread so I don't know if anyone else has answered this, but when my mom was pregnant with me more than 30 years ago they induced her 6 weeks early (which ended up being failure to progress and a c-section) because they believed there was meconium in the fluid.
heldt123's Avatar heldt123 10:44 PM 04-22-2005
A friend at work told me to lay around, eat whatever I wanted, just get the epidural, and everything will be Ok. All of which are counterproductive to a healthy birth...????
heldt123's Avatar heldt123 10:48 PM 04-22-2005
This wasn't advice, but I overheard a lady at work bragging about how she made her doctor induce her early so that she could go to the state fair and go on all the rides. She gave birth on a Wednesday and went on the rides on a Saturday. I just about choked right there!
soulsistah's Avatar soulsistah 11:19 PM 04-22-2005
From my MIL: Well what are you going to do after the baby is born? Is anyone going to clean him up? What about the house, won't it be a mess? (This was in response to my planned HB. Nevermind that my husband/her son and I had moved cross country for me to go to midwifery school and I had just graduated???)

My Grandmother who was a L&D nurse for 30+ years: So honey how's your Dr. visits going? Have you decided to have the baby naturally or not? (Again after just graduating from midwifery school!!!!!)

Alrighty then! I just finally gave up talking to them about it.
USAmma's Avatar USAmma 03:38 AM 04-23-2005
I was told by a group of Indian women at a cultural event that dh and I attended, "I think your baby must be a girl. Yes, a girl. Girls will steal a mother's beauty when she's carrying."

Um, thanks. : I didn't think I was *that* ugly. :LOL

Second thing is that I was told by Dh's guru to avoid violent or shocking movies or music because then the baby would be out of control with emotions. I humored dh to the point where he covered my eyes if a bad commercial came on. Well . . I gave birth to a little firecracker of a child. With Nitara's pregnancy I watched whatever the heck I wanted since I was on bedrest. She turned out to be a very easy baby.
mmmummy's Avatar mmmummy 12:39 PM 04-23-2005
my ob with ds g,now 2 1/2..only went to him once. he felt my breasts for eons (at 8.2 days),enough time for me to tell him all about my school history and so on..and then says "classic engorgement"!! then they said we couldnt bring in a video for our ultrasound (when we went to pick up my records later,a pregnant woman walked by with a video tape,just like their pamplets say you can do..we were so mad/sad and dont know why they said no.) then when the woman doing the ulrasound says "8 weeks 2 days" my husband was happily saying how i was "spot on!!" for exactly how far along we thought we were..based soley on implantation bleeding and date i took the test (we didnt tell her how we knew. and my mother thinks the only way was if we only had unprotected sex once or had a condom break. um,no,no mum..but i dont explain it to her either..i dont share private things with her at all.)and she gets angry,angry that i knew how old my baby was. so she grits her teeth,remeausers,adds a bit,grumbles "8 weeks THREE days.." and thats what she put down for it..huh. then with my dd c,3 months,i had one midwife who was super eager to induce and i mean she was telling me that we would be killing our baby if we didnt,in not so many words...they thought my due date was the 15th..and honestly,that was a date i think i had given them (i didnt see a midwife until dec,but anyway..) but then it was let slip that the u/s said the 26th!! and i got to thinking about it and....yes,yes that was right,to the day!! but did they believe me then? nooo,of course not. and one of the midwives i couldnt stand was on call the morning i went into labour. i was actually praying to hold out until my favourite midwife was there for the next shift,and i did (and then some) but oh was i ever happy it was her. i could have just hugged her or danced for joy had i not been in labour!! oh,and i almost forgot,but with my son they told me my hormone levels were "a little low but nothing to worry about.." but when i got my records and compared my numbers to the norm,its amazing i didnt lose him. i have lost several other babies and they knew it to,but didnt believe me. oh,and the woman talking to us about payments and seeing the doctor and giving us our books,info packs at first kept asking me all these questions and when i refused to say how i knew i lost my babies she kept asking me over and over if i had had abortions and if i was sure..(number one i am extremely prolife,number 2 my babies had died and i couldnt stop it from happening,number three im almost in tears already and shortly after while being weighed was telling my husband i just wanted to go home..) and here she was,saying because i couldnt tell her how i knew,that i had aborted them?! and she wasnt using it in the medical way of "spontaneous abortion",either. so when i also mentioned how people cant believe you can see really tiny babies,she tells me how of course,people bring them in in little baggies all the time. she didnt put it kindly,just acted like little babies were some sort of take out gone wrong..it was just horribly sad. on the flip side they did fit me in straight away i had told them about my history. but it went downhill from there thats for sure. oh,and when i couldnt breathe for a solid week,i was told i was fine and it was just nerves at the er,and also i has a sensitive tummy (just bumping a doorknob when pregnant for me is agony) but ultrasound techs and such with always tell me they arent hurting me,or simply must be done...oh i could go on all day and i havent even had many doctors. dont even start with the woman gyn i saw about a cyst who 1) asked me if i was having sex and i said no said "i didnt think so" (thanks,i must look like a dog and no one would WANT to have sex with me!!) and used me as a "finger rest" while she was talking to me and well after she was through checking me. oh and tried to force a tetnus shot on me..okay i'll stop now..whew..
AnnMarie's Avatar AnnMarie 01:08 PM 04-23-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by mmmummy
dont even start with the woman gyn i saw about a cyst who 1) asked me if i was having sex and i said no said "i didnt think so" (thanks,i must look like a dog and no one would WANT to have sex with me!!) and used me as a "finger rest" while she was talking to me and well after she was through checking me. oh and tried to force a tetnus shot on me..okay i'll stop now..whew..
Eww on the finger rest. I was going to say I don't know how you get that she thought you were a dog and nobody would want to have sex with you by asking if you were having sex though. They ask everyone that question when you go in for an exam.......then I re-read it and saw that you meant *she sad "I didn't think so." I thought at first you had said that to her. All I can say is wow, that was R U D E!! I'm sorry you've had so many bad experiences. s
gottaknit's Avatar gottaknit 08:45 PM 04-23-2005
Hmmm... I have a couple of crazy quotes.

"If you have a homebirth you will die and the baby will die and you will regret it for the rest of your life!!!" (from my MD FIL)

"Nursing will ruin your breasts." (from my sister)

"Breastfeeding longer than three months?! Whoever heard of such a thing?!" (from MIL, who is a nurse!!!)

"I'm going to hire you a housekeeper to clean before your homebirth, to get your house as clean as the hospital so the baby doesn't get an infection." (my sister again)

:LOL :LOL :LOL
dnr3301's Avatar dnr3301 04:31 PM 04-24-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by USAmma
I was told by a group of Indian women at a cultural event that dh and I attended, "I think your baby must be a girl. Yes, a girl. Girls will steal a mother's beauty when she's carrying."

Um, thanks. : I didn't think I was *that* ugly. :LOL

Second thing is that I was told by Dh's guru to avoid violent or shocking movies or music because then the baby would be out of control with emotions. I humored dh to the point where he covered my eyes if a bad commercial came on. Well . . I gave birth to a little firecracker of a child. With Nitara's pregnancy I watched whatever the heck I wanted since I was on bedrest. She turned out to be a very easy baby.

I got both of these! Although with the second, I give my mom some credit for being caring at least, she didn't want me to watch scary movies while I was pregnant (The Exorcist was rereleased while I was pregnant with dd) because the fear hormones would freak out the baby and it (she) wouldn't know why she was scared. Kinda makes sense to me, but I don't know.
2+twins's Avatar 2+twins 07:17 PM 04-24-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by dnr3301
I got both of these! Although with the second, I give my mom some credit for being caring at least, she didn't want me to watch scary movies while I was pregnant (The Exorcist was rereleased while I was pregnant with dd) because the fear hormones would freak out the baby and it (she) wouldn't know why she was scared. Kinda makes sense to me, but I don't know.
:LOL I always joke that we scared dd2 out of me - we went at watched the updated Texas Chain Saw Masacre and later that evening she was born.
heldt123's Avatar heldt123 08:08 PM 04-24-2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by pamamidwife
a friend, who had just had a baby, told me when I was six months pregnant:

"Oh, LOVE the episiotomy! The episiotomy is YOUR FRIEND!!"

With "friends" like that, who needs enemies??
: No kidding!

Healing the episiotomy was the WORST part of giving birth. I'd have gone through the whole thing more than once if I could have avoided that stupid, idiotic, crazy, procedure.
ramlita's Avatar ramlita 12:46 PM 04-25-2005
I wonder if she meant Epidural??

It's so hard to imagine anyone being happy about getting cut open.
Maybe her provider convinced her she would have had to push for much longer otherwise? and she didn't have a good pushing experience?
Nora'sMama's Avatar Nora'sMama 12:06 AM 04-26-2005
This isn't outrageous or horrible, it's actually kind of cute, but it was EMBARRASSING. My father is a minister. When I was about 3 months pg I told my parents they could finally start telling people. So my dad announced from the pulpit one Sunday (I was sitting in the pews) that I was "with child". WITH CHILD?? I just about passed out! :LOL

He sent me an e-mail the other day referring to "when Nora pops out". Eww...I don't want to think of a) Nora "popping out" - not how I envision her being born or b) my dad thinking of Nora "popping out"!!

He just can't get the terminology right, poor guy
LizD's Avatar LizD 02:05 AM 04-26-2005
A nurse in Labor and Delivery at a local hospital said I couldn't use rice packs with my client (ie hot sox) because applying heat during labor would rupture the uterus.

?!?!?!?!

The same nurse said women who did not have epidurals didn't bond with their children as well because they were angry with them for causing them pain.

Needless to say, this hospital's csection rate is rather high.
neveryoumindthere's Avatar neveryoumindthere 12:46 PM 04-26-2005
[QUOTE=LizD]The same nurse said women who did not have epidurals didn't bond with their children as well because they were angry with them for causing them pain.

[QUOTE]


get her out of that place!
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