(The same goes for midwives - too many people want to offer all this praise, when in reality, 98% of the time, I didn't do a damn thing! It's somewhat embarassing - the MOTHER and usually her partner deserve the praise for the hard work and unity during the labor/birth!)
Funny how these births end up on the news, though. I was born in a wood shop and you don't hear anyone going on about it! (Of course, that was planned.)
It's like that woman who gave birth on a train and people thought she was mentally ill because she was so calm the entire time. If she had been screaming and thrashing about so some man could have rescued her and been a hero, maybe she wouldn't have been threatened with CPS.
|If she had been screaming and thrashing about so some man could have rescued her and been a hero, maybe she wouldn't have been threatened with CPS.|
Odessa, I understand why you are frustrated. I take everything to heart when it comes to birth and the whole "birth is scary" idea our society has just drives me nuts. I am glad to be, hopefully, breaking the cycle with my children. I don't want my girls to grow up with that same old fear of childbirth we were all given.
On the whole "giving the man credit"...I hate that. My hubby says (trying...oh trying to convince him of homebirth for our next baby) that we NEED a doctor there to deliver our baby. I told him that the doctor doesn't deliver the baby......I DO .
|I think it's the whole "man saving a woman in distress" thing. Of course no one wants to hear that women plan these sort of births all the time and take care of themselves.|
|You see the sherriff/cop/etc interviewed on the news like he performed this heroic, lifesaving act. C'mon.|
My DH has been a police officer for 13 years. He'd been working as a cop for about a year when he was the first officer on-scene and delivered a woman in the back seat of his squad car. I asked him, did he feel heroic? "No -- I was scared s---less. I'm just glad that she didn't scream too much."
He refused to grant interviews to the press, even though his chief wanted him to (it was "good P.R." : ) and said that he's glad he knows he can do it, but he'd rather not have to ever again.
My DH... my hero.
I am about this -
3vba2c mom of four teens and a little one
all intact, bf, non-vaxed
(the teenagers are weaned)
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I am one of those women that had an unplanned, unassisted birth. My little girl was born in the front seat of our minivan, on the side of the freeway. My husband caught her as she came shooting out (literally!) and the paramedics came a few minutes later. I think the reason people makes such a big deal out of it is because it's a dramatic, and to most people, a scary thing. As I think about her birth experience now, I realize how lucky we were that nothing went wrong. I think that people whog o into a homebirth prepared for a homebirth are a lot more prepared for different situations that may arise than someone who is "forced" into a homebirth (or carbirth!) and wasn't planning on it. I was so pumped up on adrenaline that I didn't have time to be scared- it was only afterwards that I realized how scary that situation was and how many things could have gone wrong.
I think in general, that people are attracted to dramatic stories. I don't know about you, but it seems like every I get in a group of women for more than a few minutes, we're sharing birth stories and other dramatic exeriences, and having a baby in such a dramatic fashion will automatically attract some attention.
And just for the record, when people start congratualting my husband for doing such an incredible job (which he did!) I always remind them, sometimes not so gently, that I was the one who did the work. And, I am completly in awe of people who have homebirths. I think that is truly amazing. And although I don't think that my dh and I would ever choose that, I have a lot of respect and admiration for those that do. (Although if my next labor is any shorter than my last, I may not have a choice!)