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m/c at 15 weeks- questions

565 views 12 replies 9 participants last post by  maisiedotes 
#1 ·
I found out this morning that my pregnancy is not viable. I am 15w1d. The OB told me I would be having a procedure- it is similar to a D&C but a bit more involved because I am further along. I was too distraught to ask alot of questions but I am just wondering if anyone else has been through it. She told me I have to go in over 2 days- one day they will give me something to ripen my cervix, the next day for the procedure. I just want to know how long the recovery is, how painful it is, etc.

Thank you for any info.
 
#2 ·
I'm so very sorry for your loss. Just so you know, it IS usually possible to wait for natural miscarriage, or take herbs to help it along. A d&c is not your only option. And they can't make you do anything. But if that's what you want then of course go with it. The downside is that you usually can't see your baby after, and many women like to have some time to say goodbye and burry the baby. I know I did.

Hugs.
 
#3 ·
I do not really have anything to add to what bcblondie had to say, but I just wanted to say I am so very sorry. I mc at one day short of 15 weeks naturally so I can not really say how it will go for you.
 
#4 ·
Thank you both. I talked to the doctor again who said it is called a D&E.

I am going to look up some info online... thanks again. I have to wait till next Tuesday. :(
 
#5 ·
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so sorry mama. sadly i have no advice, but i do know what you're going through. our loss came much earlier (around eight weeks) and i ended up getting a d&c after waiting nearly eight weeks to miscarry naturally.

hope you find the info you're looking for.

thinking of you. be kind to yourself.
 
#7 ·
I found out my little girl had passed at 17 weeks. I was given the option of a D&E or to have labor induced and deliver... I choose to deliver. It was incredibly healing to get to see and hold my baby, get pictures & mementos, footprints, etc. Just throwing that option out there, since you have a little time to think.

Peace and healing to you~ I am so sorry for your loss
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#8 ·
I want to second what vermillion said. I was also given the option of a D&E but chose to be induced (with misoprostol also called cytotec). My midwife induced me at home. The labor/delivery was easy physically. I was 17 wks when I found out but my son was about 14 wks gestation (possibly younger). I was able to get pics, see his that his features were like my other kids, tell the sex, see his hands/feet, etc. It really helped me in my process. It is not for everyone but I am very grateful that I had the chance to meet my son. This is a hard decision but I think it is important that you know you have a decision. There is not only one option.

I am so sorry for your loss.
 
#9 ·
wow, I had no idea I had the option of an induction. I think I would prefer that. I am going to re-think this. Thank you all so much for your thoughts.
 
#10 ·
Just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss mama, sorry to see you joining us here.
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I hope you're able to find an option that you can be at peace with in this painful situation. Sending you healing and gentle thoughts.
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#11 ·
pm me if you have any questions or want details. It is just good to know you have choices that way you can choose which one works best for you and your family.
 
#12 ·
My daughter also died at fifteen weeks. We did not discover her until 18 weeks 3 days. I had to fight tooth and nail to deliver her and not get the D&E. I was admitted to the hospital given cytotec, valium, and pain pills as needed for approx 12-15 hours before I delivered her. The pain was not intense. It was more like cramping you would have from an upset stomach. I delivered her myself in the hospital. the nurse cleaned her up and we got to hold her. It was totally healing to get to grieve over her actual physical body. The doctor said if I had the D&E that I would not want to see her. Which is what I so desperatley needed to grieve our loss. My mother and husband disagreed as did friends who have had miscarriages at later stages. Everyone was very supportive once she was born and she was held by her grandparents and our 16month old daughter got to see her. I had many many people come out of the woodwork and tell me that they had miscarriages and wish they had done what I had. We have pictures with her, and chose to bury her at my parents farm, (where my husband and I were married) I don't know where you live but this might be an option or most funeral homes in the area offer complimentary services for babies that pass. Hope this helps.
 
#13 ·
Quote:
Originally Posted by sassygirl5146 View Post

My daughter also died at fifteen weeks. We did not discover her until 18 weeks 3 days. I had to fight tooth and nail to deliver her and not get the D&E. I was admitted to the hospital given cytotec, valium, and pain pills as needed for approx 12-15 hours before I delivered her. The pain was not intense. It was more like cramping you would have from an upset stomach. I delivered her myself in the hospital. the nurse cleaned her up and we got to hold her. It was totally healing to get to grieve over her actual physical body. The doctor said if I had the D&E that I would not want to see her. Which is what I so desperatley needed to grieve our loss. My mother and husband disagreed as did friends who have had miscarriages at later stages. Everyone was very supportive once she was born and she was held by her grandparents and our 16month old daughter got to see her. I had many many people come out of the woodwork and tell me that they had miscarriages and wish they had done what I had. We have pictures with her, and chose to bury her at my parents farm, (where my husband and I were married) I don't know where you live but this might be an option or most funeral homes in the area offer complimentary services for babies that pass. Hope this helps.

Oh god. Mama, I am sorry for your loss. I am cringing at the thought of the baby's condition after a D&E... I want them to be able to tell me if we had a boy or a girl. I decided on the D&E but I am seriously questioning my decision again.
 
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