Worst things said to you during or after your loss - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-23-2012, 01:27 AM
 
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Hey Country girl, I don't mind you replying here.  I have to say it's good to know that there are some docs getting around without both feet planted firmly in their mouths.  If I only I could find one of these rare creatures in Oz... Hey - wait a minute, you have a koala as your avi!! Tell me you're in OZ! 

 

Soul-O.  I can't tell you how many times I've been pushed towards anti depressants and therapy in the last twelve months.  I think a lot of medical professionals (Sorry Countrygirl) have difficulty determining the difference between grief and depression - and there IS a difference. 

 

Also, I'm pretty sure you should be able to get your ultrasound pic under FOI if you want it.. I know others here have done that.  You usually just need to put it in writing. 


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Old 02-26-2012, 09:04 AM
 
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Another asshat doctor response:  "You know, at your age miscarriages are really common.  39 is just NOT the best age to be having a baby.  Now if you were 25...."  

 

Like I could magically make myself younger or something? eyesroll.gif  Sadly, I think she was trying to comfort me but obviously she failed miserably.

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Old 02-26-2012, 09:50 AM
 
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I've also never had a loss but many many of my dear friends have. 

All I want to say to you is, OH MY GOSH, ladies, I am shocked at some of the things people have said to them and you. I seriously don't GET it. What ever happened to "I am so sorry. If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know". Or hell, even just "I'm so sorry. Hang in there". There, was that hard to say? NO. 

 

 

There's a serious SERIOUS issue with pregnancy loss being treated completely blase in this society, as if its nothing, as if the woman didn't start you know planning the kid's wedding or imagining them graduating high school or college the minute you find out. Its not fair and its not right, and I swear to G-d, i wish I could hug every single one of you. 

 

I get really SEETHINGLY angry when I hear stories like this because its so insensitive and horrid and just... I'd like to believe that people can't be that idiotic, but I know, from personal experience with my own damn family that it is. (My grandmother upon finding out ANYONE is pregnant at any stage says grimly: "don't get too excited, you might lose it" and she had four losses!!!!!) 

 

 


 
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Old 02-26-2012, 12:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh, Jennifer, that's dreadful! I'm trying not even to think about my asshat doctor that I divorced at the beginning of my last pregnancy. SUCH an insensitive idiot.

 

And ilovetchotchkes, your grandmother probably gets scared because she sees people (who haven't had a loss) get a positive test and immediately order the nursery furniture and she considers this very naive. It IS naive, of course, but it's just one of those things you can't understand unless you've been through it. I miss the days when to me a positive test meant a baby in nine months. Now I know that just doesn't happen.


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Old 02-26-2012, 02:46 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by M Anna View Post

Oh, Jennifer, that's dreadful! I'm trying not even to think about my asshat doctor that I divorced at the beginning of my last pregnancy. SUCH an insensitive idiot.

 

And ilovetchotchkes, your grandmother probably gets scared because she sees people (who haven't had a loss) get a positive test and immediately order the nursery furniture and she considers this very naive. It IS naive, of course, but it's just one of those things you can't understand unless you've been through it. I miss the days when to me a positive test meant a baby in nine months. Now I know that just doesn't happen.

 

 

I wish I could think that of her, I REALLY wish. But she tells my 12 year old cousin that she's fat (when she's just got that kid pudge yanno?). She says it to upset you, BELIEVE me. Other family members who have had losses (my mom) almost smacked her when she said it. 

 

I wish with all my freaking heart that the 2 lines meant a baby in 9 months. Then 3 of my friends who have been devastated, two of them multiple times could have what they dearly want more than life itself. When they've told me, I've bawled for hours on their behalf. I've prayed even though one of them is a staunch atheist, but I do believe in G-d, and I can't figure out for the life of me WHY.  I've heard other friends who didn't know make stupid comments and I went off on them. 

 

So even though i'm a complete stranger, ladies, I just want to say, I am so so so incredibly sorry with what you've gone through and I hope to G-d that you get what you deeply wish for. *hugs* 

 


 
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Old 02-26-2012, 03:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm sorry your friends have had such a hard time, but thank you for being a good friend to them.

 

Re: your grandmother, my mother said some dreadful things to me after my first loss and she simply prides herself on saying what she's thinking. She's also told me I'm fat for most of my life, etc. She considers this a virtue. shrug.gif


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Old 02-29-2012, 08:50 AM
 
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Well, I wanted to add that my doctor was actually pretty incredible.  My midwife wasn't, and unfortunately she was the one I was seeing. But my dr. was so kind at the follow ups. At my check up a year after, I still had questions, and he took the time to go through all of my ultrasounds frame by frame and answer all of my silly questions.  He was awesome, and I have to say just having the loss acknowledged kindly in a medical way was very healing for me.

 

 Maybe we could pass out stickers for the asshat doctors to wear, so we can identify the good ones more quickly.  :)

 

The nurse at the hospital did give me the " well, its no big deal, you can have another." ugh. 


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Old 02-29-2012, 02:13 PM
 
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Yep, asshat doctor here too.  

 

Something along the lines of, WITH an accompanying eyeroll "I don't know why women get so upset about miscarriages. They happen all the time". No shit. Thank you.

 

Is that supposed to somehow make me feel better? How bout keeping that special little gem to yourself, Doctor Compassion? He then proceeded to chuckle at me for speculating reasons why it may have happened.


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Old 03-05-2012, 10:15 PM
 
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oh this thread just blows me away.

My favorite "maybe this is god's way of saying you shouldn't have anymore children" Said 3 times!!!

"when are you going to stop doing this to yourself"

"you weren't planning on getting pregnant anyways"

"you should appreciate the children you do have"

and many more gyms

 

BUT the winner is...................................

(Said to my dh by a "friend" of his when dh told him we had lost the baby) "I hear little babies taste like chicken jaw.gif    umm, yeah they don't speak anymore.


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

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Old 03-06-2012, 03:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Nicole...I am speechless...yikes.gif


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Old 03-07-2012, 04:51 PM
 
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Maybe this makes me a real asshole, but at this point I don't care, I just need to get if off my chest.  I realized this morning that the light bleeding I have been experiencing is not normal first trimester spotting when I got two negative pregnancy tests.  I am still in the process of my miscarriage.  Right now.  A few days ago I was asking my fiance if we could come up with a 'game plan', like when to worry enough to go get an u/s, whether it was best to hold off until we could likely get a strong heartbeat (almost 6 weeks today), etc.  And he wasn't really 'hearing' me so I say, "Can you follow along, please, with what I'm trying to say'.  Kinda rude, sure, but he SNAPS at me and says, "Can you quit being such an f-ing JERK to me?", at which point I kinda lost my cool and went off about how alone I felt during my first pregnancy and how I didn't want to do it alone again and how he needs to be supportive, etc. My exact words were, "If you can't man up and be supportive of ME when I'M going through this, if I have to do this ALL ALONE, AGAIN, then I might as well just have an abortion."  So I went to work, felt absolutely terrible because my baby was the thing I most wanted in the world, so I send him a message apologizing.  I told him I was sorry and that he was a fantastic partner and would be an excellent daddy and I know I have some issues from my first pregnancy and birth I have to work through but it's not fair to take that crap out on him.  SO.  This morning within an hour of discovering I was, indeed, having a miscarriage he says to me, "So... do you still want to be with me?  I mean, the other day you were talking about aborting it."  To which I explained that what I said the other day was in anger at being snapped at and that I never even for a second meant it and I felt terrible about saying it immediately afterward and that he's an insensitive lout for bringing that up while I'm still in the middle of this.  Am I wrong?  Maybe I deserve this for saying what I did.  At least that's what I feel he was implying...  THEN, he whips out his phone and says, 'So you should ovulate in, what, fourteen days?'  As if I'm going to just want to start getting busy trying to make another baby.  I'm like, dude, can't I get through this moment right now, have this miscarriage that's happening to me NOW, before you try to get me pregnant again?:  Anyone else's partners not handle it well/say insensitive crap to them?  I don't even know what to think.... 

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Old 03-07-2012, 07:11 PM
 
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hotsauce - First of all, I'm so sorry that you are losing your baby.  hug2.gif  If you are in need of some support, please check out the TTC after a loss thread.  There are a lot of really awesome women there.

 

I said something similar to my DH during my pregnancy with DS.  I felt like my needs were being completely ignored at that point in time, and I was just really worried that we'd have a baby and he'd still not realize that he needed to step up because our family needs would be completely different than our needs as just a couple (I hope that made sense; it's a bad sentence).  We actually had a rough time the whole time I was pregnant, because he was so scared and worried about all of the changes, and I was going through a lot of job stress on top of being a hormonal, cranky mess.  And just for the record, he has turned into an amazing father and a better husband than he ever was when we were childless.  I don't know what I'd do without him.  luxlove.gif

 

When you two are both calm, I'd sit down and just let him know that you were/are scared, and it's sort of crazy having a miscarriage or pregnancy physically happening inside you.  I think men just process things differently.  I know that for my DH, it didn't seem to really sink in that we were REALLY having a baby until I went into labor.  And even then I had to convince him to stay home from work.  He was just in some kind of denial.  But for us women, it is happening to us, inside us, and often we are aware we're pregnant before a test confirms it.  It's a completely different experience.  The fact that you were pregnant probably hadn't even really sunk in for him yet, so the loss isn't as real for him either.  If you can explain how you're feeling, maybe he'll realize that you are in a lot of emotional pain right now and be a bit more careful of what he's saying and how he says it.  He may also be more likely to excuse your hormonal rampages.  The best thing DH and I ever learned was when to keep our mouths shut!  We've both gotten very good at not snapping back at the other, even when completely provoked...  eyesroll.gif


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Old 03-15-2012, 02:20 PM
 
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2 weeks after losing our first born, who was stillborn at 38 weeks, as we walk in to our friend's daughter's 2nd birthday, "I guess your plans have changed, huh?"

 

Luckily for her I was too much of a zombie yet to fully realize what she had said until later....


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Old 03-15-2012, 02:25 PM
 
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Oh, and speaking of shitty-ass mothers. We found out before labor that our daughter was going to be stillborn. While I am in labor, literally pushing out my dead child, my mother says to my MIL (they were in the hallway) , "Don't worry, she will probably be giving birth by this time next year anyway."


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Old 03-15-2012, 02:28 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Soul-O View Post

OK.. at least I'm starting this post with a case of the giggles at all of the asshat comments.  I think that Army medicine attracts a serious number of both complete doofuses and total asshats, so I generally assume that either one or the other will treat me at any given time.  However, there are a fair number of totally awesome older MDs who have seen it all and are super laid back yet responsive, so with any luck, one of those docs will be at my next delivery.

 

Moving on..

 

I had an ER doc tell me "it must be sad to want something when you can't have it" when I was experiencing my first in a series of three back to back miscarriages.  The phrasing was so weird, almost like he was comparing my loss to not getting that Coach bag I wanted for Christmas!  The same MD went on to tell me that I should consider having my tubes tied because "35 is pretty old to conceive, and you'll probably have a baby with chromosomal abnormalities anyhow.  With all of these miscarriages, your chances are slim.  I'd cut my losses if I were you."  Well, I went on to have a perfectly healthy 8 lb 2 oz baby boy about 16 months later, so I guess 36 wasn't too old to have a baby without chromosomal issues .  The OB who gave me the results of the pathology report from my most recent loss wouldn't allow me to have a copy of the baby's ultrasound picture (taken prior to her demise) because, "we need a complete chart, and besides, why do you want something so morbid?  Are you sure you should be having more kids?  I think you might need to be seen over at Behavioral Health.  Here, I'll write you a referral, and how about some Zoloft?".  All this because I wanted to have a lasting reminder of the little girl I'll never get to take home greensad.gif.


 

Oh my G-d! That is horrible!


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Old 03-15-2012, 02:34 PM
 
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Hi ladies.  I hope you don't mind my replying to this thread.  The title caught my eye and the responses have been pretty interesting.  

 

First, just wanna say, not all us docs are asshats, I swear!  Some, certainly.  Majority, probably.  But there are some of us who truly care and think before we speak. smile.gif

 

Second, I am fortunate to have never experienced my own loss, but my brother lost his daughter at five months of life in a tragic accident.  My other brother said to him, "God must have saved her from something really bad."  The brother who lost the daughter didn't seem terribly upset by this statement, but I think it was one of those instances in which he was so numb from grief he couldn't really react.  I, however, was livid.  I mean, my niece was healthy, happy, and a perfect baby in every way.  She died in a tragic accident!  WTF was God saving her from because to me dying at 5 months of age is pretty bad!  I told him he was being insensitive and he should never say that to someone who just lost a baby.  It's been three years since the incident, and it still makes me so angry when I think about it.  Probably doesn't help that this particular brother and I have never really gotten along anyway.  He's such an asshat!  orngtongue.gif




I happened to have a great doc through our whole loss!

 

I think people say stuff like that when then really don't know what to say. I got a lot of God this and God that and it was not helpful, at all! I was at an Easter-y Church Pancake supper thing with my husband's grandma and just wanted to sit there and eat my frickin pancakes when the pastor comes over and said something about how now I understand what Easter is all about. First of all , I had no idea what that meant and secondly was soooo close to saying, "You know what? G-d is a baby killing assh-----." But I realized I was in church and she meant well and I was just really angry so I didn't say anything. Grrrrr.


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Old 03-15-2012, 02:41 PM
 
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Oh, last story I promise! I went to, what would've been, my postpartum checkup and the nurse brings me back and says, "Oh, dangit, you didn't bring the baby with!"

 

And that's when I realized that nobody. told. her. what. happened. I told her she was stillborn and I think the nurse's heart stopped beating for a few minutes. I felt sooo bad for her! Poor girl, she was so nice through my whole pregnancy, too!


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Old 03-15-2012, 04:18 PM
 
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I happened to have a great doc through our whole loss!

I think people say stuff like that when then really don't know what to say. I got a lot of God this and God that and it was not helpful, at all! I was at an Easter-y Church Pancake supper thing with my husband's grandma and just wanted to sit there and eat my frickin pancakes when the pastor comes over and said something about how now I understand what Easter is all about. First of all , I had no idea what that meant and secondly was soooo close to saying, "You know what? G-d is a baby killing assh
." But I realized I was in church and she meant well and I was just really angry so I didn't say anything. Grrrrr.

Try sitting at the Passover Seder with icky in-laws and having to read aloud "god smiting the firstborn of Egypt" a hundred times. That really sucked. Especially because I did lose my firstborn.
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Old 03-18-2012, 09:44 AM
 
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UGH! I bet. How awful. We are about to go back to the same church today with DH's grandmother for a turkey lunch thing and I am really hoping the pastor doesn't saying anything to me about our 1 year old or even congrats or anything. I'm hoping to just avoid her...


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Old 03-30-2012, 01:55 AM
 
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Ok, so I just experienced my 2nd back to back loss 2 weeks ago, and finally I got the nerve to come back on mothering..so this is just the place for me. I have a few gems that have been spoken to me quite recently.

 

1. By my "friend" who has by the way, been my "bff" since high school and we are now 36.."Did you pass your tissue yet"  UM that is not tissue. That is my baby. I didn't speak to her for about a week..then she emailed me again and I described in full detail the horrific nature of what I had gone through..labor but no baby..serious gushing that almost caused me to go to the hospital..and her response? "Oh yeah sometimes I have gushing with my period too." WTF woman?? This is not my period. This is me losing my second baby in 7 months when I have been trying for 2 1/2 years!!!! Please do not minimize my miscarriage. Oh yeah..when I told her I lost the baby after the devastating ultrasound she also said "Sorry to hear you weren't pregnant after all." WHAT? I never said I wasn't pregnant!!!! I really truly do not know what her problem is. I am seriously considering not really hanging out with her ever again.

 

2. Second friend. Who was also in our wedding. "Maybe your eggs are all just super bad because you are over 35 now."  Really?! This is how you comfort me? Knowing I desperately want my son to have at least one sibling and that DH and I love and adore children and want more badly? Thanks.

 

3. MIL. "I know it is hard right now but I'm confident God has a plan." I know she probably meant this well. But honestly, I am really not on board with God's plan in the moment when I am in severe pain and anguish, both physically and mentally.

 

On a positive note.. I have one friend who brought food over and was very sympathetic and wonderful. My ob.gyn was really great about it. DH's aunt and uncle sent a very nice card that actually was quite comforting, as they have had 2 losses themselves.

 

But overall, I am SHOCKED at how people think that it's not a big deal and you should just be over it immediately, AND that it is so extremely taboo to talk about it. No one treats miscarriage as something REAL to be grieved. But it truly is a loss. And I just don't understand why it is so hard for people to understand that. It seems like people we know have either been very insensitive or avoided us completely. Even my own mother. It makes no sense! Why?!??!

 

Thanks for letting me vent ladies. I am terribly sorry for all of your losses AND the horrible things that have been said to you all. Much love to you.

 

 

 

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Old 03-30-2012, 04:04 AM
 
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I had been to be pregnant with them!! What a seriously dumb thing to say.

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Old 03-30-2012, 04:07 AM
 
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http://www.infoocean.info/avatar3.jpgI think the point where I would worry is if they don't seem to understand you - at this point, they should start to understand and recognize words, even if they aren't saying them yet.

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Old 03-31-2012, 05:01 PM
 
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I've had 3 miscarriages, and had many awful experiences throughout them, with people's responses and reactions. 

 

The first miscarriage (7 weeks), I was waiting for a call from the doctor's office to tell me if I needed to go in for a D&C. Like 4 days had passed and I was getting anxious about waiting, and just wanted it to be over.  I called the doctor's office, and told them what happened and asked if they could please just go check the blood test to make sure my HCG levels had gone down.  The nurse was all rude with me about her limited time and told me to hold on.  She came back and practically yelled, "You're NOT pregnant, OKAY?"  I just cried and said "its not okay," and hung up.  I wouldn't talk to anyone about it - I refused to discuss it.  I was so hurt that it was a topic that I literally couldn't breech.  As a result, I didn't get a lot of stupid comments, because I just refused to talk about it, or hear anything.  I did get a nice response from my daughter's speech therapist, who cried with me when I told her, hugged me, and told me I wasn't alone.  I've never forgotten that, and it is 8 years later. 

 

The second miscarriage was the one I was furthest along (12 weeks).  The nurses and doctors at the hospital told me that it was "nature taking its course," which I guess is the best way to *try* to comfort someone and let them know it isn't their fault, though it felt like it was completely UN-natural.  

 

I got a LOT of responses after that, that were REALLY difficult to handle.  People constantly told me it was God's will.  I'm definitely in the camp of believing that God isn't going to create a child in your womb only to kill it shortly after, for no known reason.  There is nothing to learn from it, no greater good can come of it... it is a senseless loss, and not something I would give God credit for. 

 

I also got the line a lot that something would be wrong with the baby, and I wouldn't want a special needs baby, would I?  Yeah... my oldest has severe special needs.  I eventually started asking them if God messed up by not killing her off in utero, and they finally shut up about it.  As a side note, when I got pregnant with my youngest (now age 6), people often asked me how I could possibly get pregnant knowing I could be bringing another person into the world like my oldest daughter who has special needs (not genetic by the way).  I always told them that if I had another one like her, I would be the luckiest mom around.  People are stupid and insensitive. 

 

My 3rd miscarriage, I had only been given the chance to tell about 3 people, hubby included, before I miscarried, so I didn't talk about the miscarriage a lot with people. 

 

Recently, I am pregnant again, and my MIL told me "God will protect this baby, so you don't have anything to be worried about!!" (insert shit-eating-grin and cheerleader-chipper voice here).  yeah... I'm not going to put this on God one way or another.  I asked her, "if you believe that, then where was he when I lost 3 other babies?"  She shut up.

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Old 04-10-2012, 07:40 PM
 
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ugh, ugh and more ugh!!! All these stories are just terrible but I was prepared to hear some bad things and so many comments (of the "God or nature blah blaha blah..type) pretty much rolled of my back.  BUT....last week, I lost it!  It took me over a week to add to this thread because I was so shocked and angry.  And even now, recalling it, I'm getting upset again.

 

I'll explain...

A friend of mine (a close friend too, not just some acquataince) is due just 10 days after I would've been.  We were actually really excited to be pregnant together, and at first, she was a great support in my loss (she's had a couple of miscarriages also, so she was one of the first people I called when I found out,at 15 weeks, that the baby was no longer alive and that I would need a d&c).

Anyway, last weekend, we went out for dinner.  I was feeling much better, though seeing her for the first time, with her cute little belly, was really, really hard (I hadn't seen her, just talked with her almost every day, since I had lost the baby).  Anyway, during the entire dinner, all she talked about was her pregnancy, and how she was feeling, blah, blah blah... AND THEN, she had the galls to ask me if she could borrow my maternity clothes.  I  was so shocked. I mean, I would lend it to her of course, but I DUE TIME!  I was still bleeding from my miscarriage!

 

I'm still not over it.  I haven't talked to her since, and  I don't even now if I can see her for the next 5 months.  I think it'll be to hard.

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Old 04-10-2012, 08:23 PM
 
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Bena - Wow.  WOW.  I'd be shocked, hurt, and angry too.  I'm so sorry she said that to you. 


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Old 04-10-2012, 09:21 PM
 
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I had two miscarriages, both were early at 8 and 10 weeks.The first one I had a D&C after, but the second one the doctor told me it would be better if I let the miscarriage happen naturally.I was scheduled to go away on a business conference and  I told my boss about the miscarriage and I wanted to stay home.She had no sympathy and so I flew off to another state and bled my way through talks and dinners.She was a real jerk who had no empathy for anyone.Also at work,when I told a woman I worked with about the first miscarriage she said "Well good- now you see it's not going to be that easy."           The OB told me I should stop trying to get pregnant for months -to take time to grieve and feel better.Actually I was 40 years old and had never had a baby.The only thing that was going to make me feel better was having a baby.Don't stop me from trying when you told me how time is ticking away with every month.I went through 4+years of infertility treatments after the miscarriages.We stopped when they said they felt there was no hope .I was too old to conceive.We had also looked into adoption .We went on a vacation and I told my husband I was too drained from going through the infertility treatments to go through the adoption process.We came home and the next cycle I was pregnant.I gave birth to a healthy boy three weeks after my 46th birthday.

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Old 04-11-2012, 03:44 AM
 
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My mom and I have a difficult relationship. It's better now that I live 1600 miles away. After my first loss, we had this conversation:

 

Mom: I'm really worried about you. I'm afraid you're going to get really depressed.

Me: (my mom thinks I have real feelings? my mom UNDERSTANDS my feelings...?)

Mom: So I don't want you to go and eat a bunch of chocolate, okay?

Me: (thaaaaat's more like it....)

 

~Rose

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Old 04-11-2012, 05:26 AM
 
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It sucks that you had such a horrible experience, but what a beautiful ending!!!!
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by momct View Post

I had two miscarriages, both were early at 8 and 10 weeks.The first one I had a D&C after, but the second one the doctor told me it would be better if I let the miscarriage happen naturally.I was scheduled to go away on a business conference and  I told my boss about the miscarriage and I wanted to stay home.She had no sympathy and so I flew off to another state and bled my way through talks and dinners.She was a real jerk who had no empathy for anyone.Also at work,when I told a woman I worked with about the first miscarriage she said "Well good- now you see it's not going to be that easy."           The OB told me I should stop trying to get pregnant for months -to take time to grieve and feel better.Actually I was 40 years old and had never had a baby.The only thing that was going to make me feel better was having a baby.Don't stop me from trying when you told me how time is ticking away with every month.I went through 4+years of infertility treatments after the miscarriages.We stopped when they said they felt there was no hope .I was too old to conceive.We had also looked into adoption .We went on a vacation and I told my husband I was too drained from going through the infertility treatments to go through the adoption process.We came home and the next cycle I was pregnant.I gave birth to a healthy boy three weeks after my 46th birthday.



 

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Old 04-11-2012, 05:57 PM
 
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Yes, Bena,We had a wonderful ending.I feel the miscarriages are a part of our history but luckily are not the whole story.We went through a lot and if I wasn't a hunt and peck-takes forever-typist I would say more.I am sorry for  anyone else who has had a miscarriage and hope you will also have an eventual happy ending.

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Old 06-14-2012, 02:44 AM
 
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I miscarried on Monday, and yesterday I was crying and my DH told my MIL I was upset and she said something along the lines of "She's still upset? She only knew for a week or so.."


Wife to DH dh_malesling.GIF(12.10.2009), Anchorage based doula joy.gif, Proud mama to Autumnblahblah.gif (09.03.2008), Sylas bouncy.gif(04.25.2010), angel1.gif(06.11.2012), Callioperainbow1284.gif(04.23.2013)

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