HELP missed miscarriage -nothing happening - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 10 Old 02-25-2014, 05:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
mamahunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 12
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

To day I woke up and found I was bleeding...then spotting with light cramping. My doctor sent me to the ER as I am 11 weeks pregnant. They found that my cervix was slightly dialated- which they informed me was not normal but said we would not know anything until after the doctor examined the ultrasound results. Upon waiting hours on end some one came in to inform me that my baby has no heartbeat and had probably died inside me about a week ago and that I am to go home and eventually it will all come out.... this just doesn't seem right to me how they can leave it inside me and not even give me a time frame of when it should occur by. if the fetus died a week ago but I am starting to bleed this morning and it still hasn't happened yet? I am scared and alone just waiting at home with my one year old son for my miscarriage to actually happen. I thought a miscarriage just happened.. I did not imagine you would have to miscarry for weeks.... cant you get sick if something dead is left inside you? please help I feel so scared and alone.

mamahunny is offline  
#2 of 10 Old 02-25-2014, 05:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
mamahunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 12
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I do not feel any pains or cramps. Am I suppose to stay on bed rest until it happens? What if I am out and it happens unexpectedly?PLease help

mamahunny is offline  
#3 of 10 Old 02-25-2014, 05:07 PM
 
Katie8681's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Northern Cali
Posts: 676
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Can't you call your doctor and tell him or her that you'd prefer not to wait for the miscarriage to complete on its own?

At home amongst the redwoods treehugger.gif with my husband and my son, born 7/5/11 familybed1.gif  Instant CNM, just add caffix.gif !

Katie8681 is offline  
#4 of 10 Old 02-25-2014, 05:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
mamahunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 12
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I had asked after they told me there was no heartbeat if they could "clean me out". They stated since I was 11wks its a procedure not taken at this stage, that it should happen on its own.

mamahunny is offline  
#5 of 10 Old 02-25-2014, 05:41 PM
 
fisherfamily's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 363
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I know this is hard. I have done it twice.

It really is better for your body to try to let things take their own course. It could happen anytime over the next several days to a week. Since you are already dilating some, and are bleeding, it probably.won't be much longer. For me, they both felt like a mini labor.

If you experience a lot of bleeding, or don't miscarry within another week, you should consider going back to the doctor.

I'm sorry. greensad.gif
fisherfamily is offline  
#6 of 10 Old 02-25-2014, 06:43 PM
 
Katie8681's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Northern Cali
Posts: 676
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
FisherFamily, maybe it was best for you, but it's not best for everybody. For some women they would rather not have a long drawn-out process. When that's the case, you can have a dilation and curettage (D&C) done. It's a common procedure. There are also medications you can take to help your body complete the miscarriage. Mamahunny, if that's just what the ER told you, I would approach your actual doctor and see what he or she says.

At home amongst the redwoods treehugger.gif with my husband and my son, born 7/5/11 familybed1.gif  Instant CNM, just add caffix.gif !

Katie8681 is offline  
#7 of 10 Old 02-26-2014, 11:16 AM
 
nsmomtobe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: NS, Canada
Posts: 1,177
Mentioned: 8 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 13 Post(s)

My 11 week miscarriage started out very similar to yours (although I found out that the baby had died weeks before so theoretically should have been smaller) and I was given the option to let it happen naturally, take something to speed the process along, or have a D&C. I chose the D&C and was scheduled in for the next day. However, the doctor told me to go to ER if anything changed in the meantime. When I got home from the consultation, I passed a large clot, so (even though I thought at the time that that was all the tissue) I went to ER. I'm glad I went because I was not prepared for the amount of bleeding that occurred after that. I ended up getting an emergency D&C that night. I do not regret going that route. Having experienced that, I would choose D&C again for an 11 week loss and in fact I chose it without hesitation for my 9.5 week loss (I was already bleeding heavily and in pain and I just wanted it to be over). If I were in your shoes, I would definitely talk to a doctor about these options. Also, I would try to find someone to watch your son because if you start bleeding heavily, you may have to go to ER.

 

To answer your question about infection, yes, you can get an infection if tissue is left in you after the miscarriage, but it is unlikely to set in only a week after the baby has died. I actually don't know any statistics on this, but what happened to you (and me) is a missed miscarriage, where the baby dies and the body does not realize it and let go. Most people I know who have had this happen have started to miscarry within 4-5 weeks of the baby's death. So it is quite common and infection usually does not set in during that time. If the pregnancy does not end on its own, a D&C is usually performed, so I don't know at what point it might lead to infection if the woman didn't know about it. However, after a miscarriage, a woman should be aware of signs of potential infection because if there is any tissue left behind, this is possible. Actually, I'm not sure if I answered your question, but I hope I helped.


Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
nsmomtobe is offline  
#8 of 10 Old 02-26-2014, 04:21 PM
 
newmamalizzy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,577
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
I agree with the other posters that it may be more dramatic than you expect. I didn't have much forewarning for mine, and had no idea how intense the experience would be. They talk about "one pad an hour.". This was more like a pad a second, and the pains were legit contractions. I don't think it's like that for everyone, but it can be. I wish I'd known because I was do scared about what was happening to my body, on top of the upset about the baby... I hope the best for you, whatever route you choose. I know it must be a really difficult time for you.
newmamalizzy is online now  
#9 of 10 Old 02-28-2014, 02:40 PM
 
Margo B's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Arizona
Posts: 183
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

It seriously pains me that we don't support miscarrying women better.  The most common type of miscarriage is a missed miscarriage and the time between when the baby stopped growing and the actual miscarriage process taking place is usually 2-3 weeks, sometimes longer which can be completely normal. if we prepared and supported women, we wouldn't have so many who are surprised and worried when it happens to them.  A D & C is surgery, and can effect future fertility and births.  It is linked to higher rates of postpartum hemorrhage.  It is a great procedure when it is needed, and can help women that want it over with asap, though I think less would choose that if they were more supported,  If you are waiting to have a miscarriage, I would recommend that you stay home as much as possible.  It is likely that it will be a mini-labor (contractions that open the cervix that peak with the passing of the baby and other tissue) like someone else already mentioned.  Typically the sac comes out, as well as the placenta.  Sometimes the membranes come out separately too.  If you have severe cramping, something is likely close to coming out.  I would compare it to transition during a birth, not in intensity perhaps, but in the feeling of giving up and out of control-ness.  You can use a strainer under the toilet seat lid or bleed into a large bowl if you want to keep track of the tissue (this is highly recommended, but typically you also get an u/s after to be sure there is nothing left in the uterus).  It is something our bodies are designed to be able to do on their own though, so that should give you some confidence.  The only thing to watch for is your bleeding.  It will likely be more blood that you would expect, and can be alarming if you aren't prepared.  It increases until tissue passes (this pattern can happen 2-3 times though over the course of a few days even).  The amount of bleeding should correlate to the amount of cramping.  A steady trickle can be normal for a few seconds if that means something is almost out, and then it should taper off once tissue has passed.  I have had 2 natural miscarriages at home at 9 and 11 weeks.  I have also "midwifed" others through miscarriage and have attended births for the last 3 years.  Miscarriage education and support is something I am passionate about, so that when we are faced with this trauma, we are all more prepared.  I am hoping to get some really amazing resources made through the site I work with - indiebirth.com so I can just send that information all together to people looking for this information that is so hard to find.  PM me if you have specific questions or just want to talk <3

Margo B is offline  
#10 of 10 Old 03-01-2014, 01:46 PM
 
brittkneek's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 3
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamahunny View Post

To day I woke up and found I was bleeding...then spotting with light cramping. My doctor sent me to the ER as I am 11 weeks pregnant. They found that my cervix was slightly dialated- which they informed me was not normal but said we would not know anything until after the doctor examined the ultrasound results. Upon waiting hours on end some one came in to inform me that my baby has no heartbeat and had probably died inside me about a week ago and that I am to go home and eventually it will all come out.... this just doesn't seem right to me how they can leave it inside me and not even give me a time frame of when it should occur by. if the fetus died a week ago but I am starting to bleed this morning and it still hasn't happened yet? I am scared and alone just waiting at home with my one year old son for my miscarriage to actually happen. I thought a miscarriage just happened.. I did not imagine you would have to miscarry for weeks.... cant you get sick if something dead is left inside you? please help I feel so scared and alone.



I bleed for 7 days after I miscarried. Your not alone.
brittkneek is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off