Delurking to offer a suggestion. I went on a search for a reusable pull-up last fall for my 50 lb+ 5 year old who wets at night several times a week. Most of what the diapering sites offered were too small or too close to his weight for me to feel comfortable investing in them. Then I found this website: Drymids
This company makes a line of protective underwear for handicapped children. My son loves the pull on underwear. We use the underwear with the reuseable insert and it holds his big pees in just fine, though he needs every bit of absorbancy it offers.
The design for the pull on underwear is similar to big boy pants (another plus for us). The sides are a stretchy synthetic, and the middle is a thick cottonor cotton blend soaker with a PUL type outside layer. It is really a pocket pull up, because you can either lay the insert (more layers of cotton) across the crotch like a extra soaker but tucking the ends under flaps at the front and back, or you can put the insert between the PUL layer and the soaker layer. We just lay it in, but sometimes the other is nicer.
The whole thing is a little bulky, and I have been thinking about sewing some hemp soakers to fit. My large Joeybunzs are way too wide, the crotch is too narrow. For someone who sews, it would be easy to trace off one of their inserts and make your own.
I gave so much detail because the website wasn't clear as to how the pants are constructed, and gives the impression that you can often just change the insert and reuse the pants between pees. We have not found that to work at all, the whole thing needs a wash. Also, several washes are needed for best absorbancy, which they did not mention either.
They also offer a new overnight pant, a side snap version and a style with boxer shorts that I think would be good for discreet 'sleep over with friends' protection. We will be buying some of these soon.
Good luck in finding your best solution.