Confessions of a cloth diaper husband - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey there ladies. This IS NOT Kristina, I'm her husband.

I’m sure I’ll get a lot of negativity from this post, but I’m going to take one for the team here. My wife posts here often and we’ve been cloth diapering for a few years now. Since a few years have gone by I have formed an opinion on cloth diapering and I’ll share it with you. Why you ask? Two reasons really.
First I need to vent or else I’ll pile the infernal things up in a urine scented pile and burn them while I dance around them celebrating my emancipation!
Second I thought I tell you how YOUR husband feels but won’t share. :LOL
Here goes:
I understand there is a cost savings. I’ll talke that for granted since it’s impossible to see since you can spend over a hundred dollars on a handfull of “dipes” only to find out they don’t work as well as you thought then have to buy a different kind.
There is a HUGE inconvience factor. With cloth, you need to have a bag with you when you go out. You need something to put the poopy, smelly mess into so you can tote yesterdays pureed carrots and peas around with you. By the way, those inquisitive looks you get aren’t always directed at your baby. Some of those people are smelling your son or daughters lunch from yesterday eminating from your diaper bag and wondering why the heck you smell like baby poop.
The next point of contention has a positive and negative spin on it. Those HUGE diapers that make your baby look like J-Lo on a bad day. It’s hard to put pants on a boy since his waist is a 2T and his butt is as large as your husbands. That’s the negative, what’s the positive? Well, I read an article about a terrible accident where a couple was flying in thier private airplane. They lost hydraulic control and the plane was falling fast. The parents put on the parachutes and preparred to jump. What about DS?? Well, they just tossed him out at 20,000 feet. The diaper cushioned the fall the baby is fine
But now I’ll tell you my biggest problem with cloth diapers. They leak!!!! My wife has spent many, many hours on this board getting tips on how to wash, fold, pre-soak etc. the diapers and they still leak. When I pick up my son I have to feel his wet bum on my arm. That’s just gross! C’mon ladies. Why the heck would you settle for a leaky, nasty diaper when disposible diapers are soo supirior? I’ve never had a Pampers leak poop up to his shoulder blades under the worst conditions. I suppose this brings up another positive point about cloth dipes. With Pampers you have to put your nose right on your baby’s bum and smell to see if the diaper is dirty.Kind of embarrasing for others to see you with your nose pressed up to his/her bum sniffing. With cloth, just look at his shoulders, you’ll see it up there. Is he wet, just touch his knee.
I tried to put a humerous spin on this, but I also tried to make a point. I do have one last point to make. I know why most if not all of you chose cloth over disposable diapers. It’s not the convenience, the cost or the looks. It’s the environmental factor. I thank you all, my dear (and hot) wife included for trying to do what is right for the earth.

[stepping off soapbox]
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#2 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:08 PM
 
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<not feeding the troll :

Shelly- www.hyenacart.com/tyedyedreams 12 years and going strong Bleed free prefolds, flats and clothes
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#3 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:12 PM
 
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Hmmmm...well, all I can say is that MY experience with cloth has been a polar opposite of yours.

Two huge things, though....the smell factor and leaking factor. That doesn't jive with my experience at all.

Disposable diapers STINK. One little pee and that diaper reeks. It must be from all the fragrance and plastic. Blech. I don't have that with my cloth at all.

Leaks? By far, my cloth leaks MUCH less than disposables. When DS was an infant, the poop blowouts were *ALL* with disposables. Now that he is a toddler, the wet leaks are with disposables. If we slack and don't get the laundry done in time and must use a disposable for nighttime, the front of his jammies are soaked in the morning. We don't have that issue with our cloth diapers.

So all I can say is that I'm sorry cloth hasn't worked for you. My experience has been completely different.
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#4 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:13 PM
 
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Good point, Shelly. :LOL
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#5 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:13 PM
 
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Let the man vent. Sometimes I hate CDs too. I don't have a partner, so I have to play both sides of the debate. (Being single mama is complicated sometimes... but I always win.)
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#6 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:14 PM
 
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:LOL Thanks for the laugh



**Disclaimer** If you were truly venting, I apologize for laughing. Its just that all the problems you described with cloth are ones I (and most of use here) have had with disposables.
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#7 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:15 PM
 
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: the things you miss out on being single.
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#8 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:15 PM
 
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:
another reason Im glad Im single
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#9 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:17 PM
 
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Shelly, that's funny.. I was thinking the same thing..

but I agree, let's let the man vent... I sure hope my dh doesn't secretely feel that way, though!.. LOL
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#10 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:19 PM
 
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Oh and ftr, not all husbands hate cloth. My husbands likes them almost as much as I do He tries to convince all his friend with kids to use them.

I am sorry you aren't feeling the cloth love though
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#11 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:22 PM
 
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I agree Lindsay.. my dh LOVES pockets.. maybe he doesn't like prefolds and some fitteds, but only because of convenience..
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#12 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:29 PM
 
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:LOL

How pissed is Kristina gonna be when she finds out what her hubby has been up to?

Thanks for the laugh and oh so witty commentary. I gotta go feed my big butted girl. It may take me awhile to get around her booty.

Mom to 4! Welcomed Aila Wren on Friday, February 25th!
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#13 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'll chime in here again (not Kristina). I can't keep all the lingo straight, but I do like the ones you put into the covers. I can't remember what my wife calls them. Those are cool. Almost as convenient as disposables and not another throw-away thing. But the ones I think she calls prefolds (ironically enough, NOT FOLDED!!!!) stink in every sense of the word!
As for those that laughed, go right ahead. I tried to post this with a sense of humor so you would at least get a kick out of it.
and trust me, most of your husbands feel this way, or they just don't change diapers unless they have to.



......Oh, and I'm not trolling, just something my wife and I go back and forth about often (in a joking manner) so I decided to post this here. But in the end, I'm behind her 100% in whatever she decides to do.
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#14 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:31 PM
 
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I know.. Kristina a big for you!!!!
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#15 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:32 PM
 
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to quote my DH "I don't know why more people don't use cloth, this is really easy!"

fwiw, using cloth was DH's idea, even when he thought it was going to be prefolds, pins and rubber pants. i was the one that needed convincing! : now he doesn't even really think about them, and neither do i - it's just the norm for us.

nak
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eta: DH does change dipes, also - my mom was impressed by a man changing a poopy cloth dipe!

Chaotic uc.jpg homeschool.gif mama to 5 plus a bonus one on the way.  stork-suprise.gif

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#16 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:35 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kristina
and trust me, most of your husbands feel this way, or they just don't change diapers unless they have to.
uh... News flash: NO ONE changes diapers unless they have to. Ok, there are a few seriously afflicted hyenas around here who change diapers just for fun, but the vast majority of us do not. It's just that "have to" tends to have a drastically different meaning for moms than for dads.

FWIW, it was a male friend, a daddy for 9 yrs, who convinced me to CD. And he had only used prefolds. So there. :LOL
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#17 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:36 PM
 
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Um, yeah, I have to agree. My dh loves cloth diapering.. he wouldn't do it any other way..!
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#18 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:41 PM
 
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a few thoughts....

no leaks here, for real

yeah, the booty is bigger but that's not a major deal. that's what longies and soakers were made for.

my dh doesn't feel this way. i can guarantee that. he would freak if i put a sposie on our baby. plus, i do most of the diaper changes. cloth makes mama happy and, everyone knows....if mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy.

i would honestly freak if my dh posted under my user id. whoa. if you think your wife is hot now, wait until she see's this post.
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#19 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:42 PM
 
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Well, in my opinion, diapering period just kinda sucks sometimes. I haven't really had problems with cloth diapers leaking, though it has happened. My worst story with that is why I decided to put DD in a Bumkins AIO. We were looking at a house when the diaper LITERALLY leaked all over the hardwood floors. I kid you not, the diaper didn't soak up a darned thing. Thank god we bought the house and those ended up being MY floors her pee was all over. In general though, I have had more leaks with disposable diapers. Huggies didn't fit so we used Pampers on occasion and those diapers are far worse smelling than any cloth diaper. Though I bought a lot, I sold a lot, and I saved tons of money over using disposables.

Really, the biggest thing that you have wrong though is that most of us cloth diaper for environmental reasons.

HAHAHAHAHHA!

No silly DH, we cloth diaper because they are so darned cute!!!!


Emily
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#20 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:43 PM
 
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I think my dh might feel like this some of the time. Seriously, until we got the aristocrat cover for night time he hated the idea of waking up in a wet puddle because DD's dipes leaked sooooooo freaking much. We still have leak issues during the day... but then again, I don't have hyena dipes (much less my dream dipe of an Elbee with those wings : ) because they cost waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to much and i don't have the time to stalk until the stores get stocked.

GREAT MOM to dd (5) and )ds( [sept 26 2006]
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#21 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:44 PM
 
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I'm glad you support your wife, and I'm sorry you hate cloth. BUT, that doesn't mean all husbands do. And my husband changes diapers AND loves cloth.

As far as the laughing, when you come here and knock cloth you will either get laughs or get flamed. I'd much rather laugh than be angry

I am sorry you don't enjoy cloth. I hope venting made you feel better The fact is, 99.9% of us here love them.
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#22 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:50 PM
 
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Kristina's dh, I am really sorry that cloth is not working for you as you would like.

Prefolds are not my most favorite diapers, either, but I use them because frankly they are cheap. My husband wouldn't touch them until he discovered the bikini twist, and now they are his preferred diapers. He uses a snappi to fasten them.

Maybe someone could post a link the the bikini twist demo?

And to K's dh, if there is one type of diaper that you are having good luck with, Maybe order some more of those? I bet you would love the very basic all-in-ones from www.verybaby.com or one of their liscensed contractors. Anyhow they are very popular for dads, babysitters, etc. Also I have had good luck with Bumkins all-in-ones, and one other cloth disliking dad that I know was fine with those.

Good luck. It is frustrating to try to find a good system when you have to get everything on the internet. Heck, I won't buy myself pants on the internet, cause it is too hard to get a good fit. So, IFYP. I am confident you can get something that works for you!
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#23 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:51 PM
 
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My DH actually really likes our cloth too! At the beginning of this pregnancy I had really bad, knock-me-off-my-feet morning sickness and we used disposables for about two months. DH was sooooooooooo happy when I said I thought I was ready to go back to the cloth.

But I think it's cool that you support your wife even though you can't stand it.
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#24 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Here I AM, yes this is Kristina.
1. I am not all too pleased dh posted under my name. He was trying all morning to set up his own ID but for what ever reason it hasn't gotten approved. Maybe it was his choice of names, disposabledaddy. :LOL
2. Ds is a supersoaker, so if we don't get it right away it can leak. I do hate that and we have never had a sposie leak.
3. Bottom line, I love my cloth and it doesn't matter how much my dh hates figuring out how to change them. He supports me and is glad to save the money and not throw things into already overflowing garbage dumps.
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#25 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:52 PM
 
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Hey Kristina, just curious - who does the laundry in your house?
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#26 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:53 PM
 
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Kristina's dh,

Oh, and for the record, we don't just do it for the environment. Most people who use cloth diapers have the experience that they work better than disposables. I'm sorry your experience has been different.

-Alice, SAHM to dd (2001) and ds (2004) each of whom was a homebirth.jpg, who each self-weaned at 4.5 years bfolderchild.gif, who both fambedsingle2.gif'd, who were bothcd.gif, and both: novaxnocirc.gif.   Also, gd.gif, and goorganic.jpg!

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#27 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 04:53 PM
 
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FIrst of all we have had probably less than a dozen leaks with cloth diapers... and if you put how long I have been diapering in succession (with two babes) we're talking like 4.5 years.

And I find the opposite with the smells actually! The second a kid craps in a disposable I can smell it from rooms away. I often find that cloth actually "muffles" the smell and I have to open the dipe to find out if there is poop!

As for my husband... he LOVES cloth diapers. Hates the smell of pampers/huggies etc. Is proud that we use cloth. NEVER has been leaked on. Tells everyone we use cloth who asks. When I was totally overwhelmed with two in cloth it was HIM that encouraged me. He totally supports my diapering addiction and he is a wonderful cloth diapering daddy.
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#28 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 05:01 PM
 
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I don't think everyone needs to get defensive and feel the need to defend cloth diapers.Let the man vent.He still is supporting his wife's choice to cloth diaper.
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#29 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 05:03 PM
 
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I hear your vent.

We went to visit some friends this weekend and used disposables. I LOVED it. Of course they are more convenient (to some people), work better (for some people), smell better (to some people), look better and fit better (for some people)...that's why like 97% if americans use them. I cloth diaper for many reasons (the environment and my baby's health at the top of the list) but if somehow disposable diapers weren't unhealthy I would be using them gleefully. As it is they are unhealthy for planet and baby so I can't use them full time, but I sure can enjoy those times in life when I allow myself to use them (like when we travel).

Kristina's husband, you should let Kristina know which diapers you like, show some enthusiasm (cause otherwise it'll be prefolds forever ) and tell her to get some more. If it gets you to change diapers willingly and stop complaining about using cloth she will probably try to collect a whole stash of diapers just for you.

(Have you guys tried pockets? Fuzzibunz are my dh's favorite and they work well for a heavy wetter)
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#30 of 125 Old 01-16-2005, 05:04 PM
 
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Wow-I have probably only had 3-4 leaks using cloth diapers on two kiddos. I am completely serious. What kind of dipes are using besides prefolds?

Maggie, wife and mom to three
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