Help with late start (5 months) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 03-05-2009, 04:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello, all! Good to be here! I was hoping someone could help offer me some tips on how to get started. My apologies for the long post.

We started about 5 days ago (she's 5 months old), and so far we've had success with one pee per day in the potty (no poops), but the success comes from keeping her diaperless and either sitting her on my lap (on a flat diaper), laying her on the floor (to watch for signals) and hovering/sitting her on her BBLP when I think I might see a signal. After she's pee'd, I put her diaper back on until the next time I think she'll need to go (after waking, big meals, etc).

However, I have sat with her on the floor (several times) for well over 2 hours just watching for a sign, and not got anything until the second I put her on down, and/or turn my back. And by the time I notice she's done, I miss the opportunity to make the PSSSS sound, although I do tell her what she did (you pee'd! good girl!).

I'm also switching to cloth (flat) diapers to to encourage her to feel uncomfortable in her own wetness (disposables keep her WAY too dry), and she does fuss and cry after she pees, but she tends to "dribble" a lot, so I'm CONSTANTLY changing her. By doing this, I'm hoping that she'll associate that when the diaper comes OFF, it's time to pee.

She also doesn't seem to show ANY signs that she's going to go (or already went), except for the 5 or so times she did it while sitting on her potty (her whole body goes stiff). Unfortunately, she does this sometimes in her diaper, even when she doesn't pee, so I can't use this signal as her cue.

And if she fusses ON the potty, I immediately take her off again and wait until I think she's about to go, which usually ends with fussing again if I hold and hover (which of course ends immediately as I want her to enjoy the experience). She will be perfectly happy for an hour or more, but it seems like she's holding it until the diaper goes back on.

Can someone offer me some tips so I'm not spending my days on the floor? Should I forget the potty altogether and just let her pee on (not in) a flat diaper so I can track her patterns and make the pssst sound?

I know this can take months, but I'm kind of at a loss on how to start...

Thanks for any help you can offer!

Edit: Something I forgot to add. I've caught a pee before (in her BBLP), and didn't know it because I didn't hear it! She did it again just now (after sitting for about a minute, so I'm not sure how long ago the pee happened). And hovering her over a sink (and waiting) isn't an option as she weighs nearly 20lbs.

Will she associate the "psssss, good pee!" cue sounds AFTER she pees?
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#2 of 6 Old 03-06-2009, 03:55 PM
 
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I don't know if she's quite considered a late starter, but here is this info if you haven't seen it already:

http://diaperfreebaby.org/index.php?...ion=285:14:230

Since she has been in disposables up until now, I think your idea of just having her in cloth for a while and not worrying too much about misses might be a good idea. As you said, then she will notice that she is wet and not like it (well, some kids seem to care and some don't) and you can go from there.

Quote:
She will be perfectly happy for an hour or more, but it seems like she's holding it until the diaper goes back on.
Are you talking about cloth or disposable in this instance?

Quote:
Will she associate the "psssss, good pee!" cue sounds AFTER she pees?
I think if you can do it as close as possible to the actual peeing, that would be better. If you catch her peeing you can also take her and put her on a potty and say 'pee goes here' or cue or something like that.

DS 2006 nocirc.gif DiaperFreeBaby angel1.gif March 2010, DD 2011

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#3 of 6 Old 03-08-2009, 04:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Ophelia View Post
Are you talking about cloth or disposable in this instance?
Disposable. We're only recently starting cloth.

I found "Diaper Free Baby" at our library today so hopefully that will give me some insight.
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#4 of 6 Old 03-08-2009, 03:54 PM
 
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We just started too and some of Ophelia's (3.5 months) signals are totally not what I had imagined they'd be. I notice that she gets mildly fussy making a little "uh uh" noise and kicks her legs like crazy if she's lying on her back (which she also does if she's playing, but this is a little more urgent or something). Also, to get started we found the timing thing really helpful. For the first 3 days I kept her either diaper-free laying on a nappy or in a cloth nappy with no cover. This way even if I didn't see her pee, she's let me know she was wet and I could bet it had happened recently. Then I literally kept a little log of what times she ate, slept and peed. Now, I have a good sense of her rhythm, so I offer the potty at those likely times and she usually pees. And if I notice her fussing a bit for what seems like no reason, I can guess it's an incoming pee!
I definitely think your idea of keeping her in cloth is a great one. Fia hates being wet at all and will let me know right away if she is. Also, try using the cloth with a snappi without a watrproof cover so it's easy to get off quickly for a potty run and so you can feel as soon as she starts peeing (it will get hot) and you can cue her.

Hope this Helps a bit...good luck
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#5 of 6 Old 03-09-2009, 10:17 PM
 
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Your post reminded me that turning your back seems to be a cue to the baby to go ahead and pee! Just kidding, but that had a familiar ring to it! Like juliav said, some of the signals are just not what I imagined. It took me awhile to get it, and really for the most part we've relied on timing and offering the potty right out of the sling and right after waking up. Fussiness while being worn is usually a signal, as is fussiness or acting weird while nursing. It sounds like you've got a great start! And don't worry if the signals elude you temporariliy or indefinitely. My LO seemed to signal quite a bit initially, but that disappeared pretty early on. Enjoy!

You can let her pee on a flat diaper as you're getting started, that's a good way to start. Hovering and holding over the sink, especially with a baby that big, gets tiring fast! We had a phase where my babe didn't care for the BBLP, but I rested her on it for poops, as in, I'd hold her over the sink, rest her on the BBLP, hold her back over the sink, etc. until she was done. (Or until I thought she was done!!!)

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#6 of 6 Old 03-10-2009, 02:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you for the replies!

I've had pretty good success with her potty immediately after naps and meals (she pee'd in it 9 times yesterday, and twice this morning), but she's not giving me ANY signs that I can see. It's ALL in timing, and following her patterns. Our E is there, but we're missing the C.

She won't pee on cue, but when she starts I tell her "Pee pee! Pssstttt!" and when she's done I show her what she just did. I try not to praise, but I don't really know how not to. LOL

We've only been doing this for a little over a week, so I'm glad that I'm catching as many as I am. That said, how long does it take before they start to associate the cue with the sound with peeing on demand?

Also, how long until they start to give you signs that they need to pee? I'm concerned that she's going to learn to wait for me to tell her when she needs to go.

I know all my questions are premature, but I'm sooooo new at this, so I appreciate any help/advice you can offer! Thank you again!
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