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-   -   Aaarrgghh! (http://www.mothering.com/forum/227-elimination-communication/1179613-aaarrgghh.html)

Moonchild77 01-04-2010 07:15 PM

Okay, I have had it, I kept my lo (ds2) in brightbots or nothing, with babylegwarmers and socks, but since he and his brother were sick( flu thing, like 2 weeks ago) he (he is now 14 mo and I ec with him since 5 mo, we were doing okay......) KEEPS on walking towards his highchair, hides behind it and PEES !!! He walks on to the carpet/rug in the living room and stands behind the wooden airport and then he comes to me, points to where he was standing and there is a LOT of pooooooop!!! AARRRGGHHH!

He goes and tells me later!! NOt even everytime.... he will NOT sit when he needs to poo, he did a few weeks ago, but not since a month or so??.....

HE always did a pee in the potty after waking, but now I take him downstairs and his pee gets in the diaper, so his second pee is in the potty, or not....
I always was soooo happy with the big morning wee in the potty, now I do not to it, it is sooo cold upstairs and he wakes up ds1 who sleeps in our bed too....

I just feel like I am only cleaning up and washing..... I like cotton diapers when he did all his poops on the potty, now I HATE those diapers!!! He screams when I want to clean his but... I let him lay on his stomache, his behind is all dirty and I wipe him with a washcloth, and he yells!! Protests!!!
I feel so at lost...

Am in a very low point atm, washed the second rug in two days... his poop is also not so firm atm..... really runny, yuk.......

Not a happy mom.....

EdnaMarie 01-04-2010 07:23 PM

Hi. Just had to give you some encouragement. He is still quite young. It's great that he's telling you, but yes difficult that he does not want to tell you before he goes. That is part of his achieving independence, though. He may just want to do the business himself and then let you know, "Look! I did it myself!" Perhaps more potties will help, perhaps not. But at this age, it's hard to do much more. Stick with it, mama. 18 months is early for most children, so you are well on your way.

sapphire_chan 01-04-2010 11:50 PM

Isn't the hiding thing a good sign that a child is developing awareness? I think in regular PL terms it's a really good, although frustrating, sign. Have you tried putting a waterproof mat and a potty where he usually hides to pee?

Moonchild77 01-05-2010 12:37 PM

you are both right, I must not be so down about it....

He has a potty where he does his peeing ;-) so, well, he just points to the spot he peed, even if there is no pee, just in his diaper and he pushes the potty out of the way, to sit on the ground to pee or poo..

We are no where near any high stage of EC, maybe only sometimes 1 or 2??

Where can I find those stages again?

Sigh, I am washing a lot here atm....

JMJ 01-05-2010 04:19 PM

Wow! He's telling you that he's going and where he's going! That's gotta be a sign that he's getting it and starting to take responsibility for his eliminations. Take a deep breath, and find a way to take care of yourself. Are you upset that you have so much poop to wash or because you feel like you know that he can go in the potty and want him to do it?

Try to let go of your expectation that he go in the potty. He's not doing that right now, but he will do it when he's ready. He's just experimenting with going in other places right now. If you can let go and love him where he is, you'll find that the hassle of washing is not as bad as you thought.

Then, think about what you can do to change the situation so that you can handle it. If you can't handle cleaning out the carpet, consider using full time diapers. If you can't handle washing out the diapers, consider changing up your washing routine to let the machine do more of the work. Or, consider sposies. Not that I think that sposies are a good idea, but consider that you have the freedom to use them if you need, and make a free choice to use whatever bottom covering or lack of bottom covering that you wish.

accountclosed3 01-06-2010 01:45 PM

my guy will do that occasionally, and other times go in the bathroom (on the floor or what have you) and then tell me.

i'm lucky that we had laminate/vinyl floors, and now are staying with a friend with hardwood/vinyl floors. so, when he does go on his own, it's easy clean up.

he's also had vomiting/diarrhea for the last 6 days. it comes and goes. he's hydrated and healthy in every other way--we went to the doctor and he even signalled to potty so we went while there.

so, it has been very messy here. he usually signals for his poops, or will go on the floor in the bathroom, but the diarrhea is sneaking up on him too fast. it scares him. he runs off to the bathroom as soon as the first one is out (surprise!) eyes wide as saucers and freaked. he then finishes (i help him and clean up) and then points out everywhere he went.

he's very cautious around it too. if he goes, he backs and walks away from it.

so, dont worry. they're getting there. it's just messy right now.

Moonchild77 01-08-2010 05:52 PM

thankyou JMJ and zoebird, yeah, right, he is getting it, telling afterwards is also good, I really need to relax... You know, it is sooo cold atm here, that EC out of the house is harder and I feel bad for him and then I do want him to feel good at home, his runny stool is soooo yellow and smelly and he also freaks out, he backs of too, funny!

thankyou, I need to take a step back and breath in and out... I just noticed how stressed I feel when i read JMJ 's remarks....

gorgorita 01-08-2010 06:00 PM

No advice here, just wanted to let you know that you'r not alone. Your kid is almost there. He already understands so much. The next step for him would be to tell you before and not after. Maybe he'll be a grad by 19 mo or so.
Dd and I are on the same stage as you are but she is 2!!! It's killing me to clean up and she poops 3-4 times a day! I am frustrated but don't feel that I should put diapers on her. So I clean up.

Forgot to say that she is in undies (not training, just regular) and then pants so that catches the poop and I at least do not have to wash the rug Pees are all absorbed) Good thing our only rug is wool. I laundry every other day and it doesn't bother me.
Maybe you can put underwear on him too? It doesn't really catch any pee but poop.

jenneology 01-08-2010 08:13 PM

My little boy did some of that too. I had to remember to be really patient and use an informing tone of voice to tell him "You know, the pee or poop goes in the potty, not on the floor. Next time you need to pee or poop, go put it in the potty. The potty is right here for you to use. You can go there next time you need to." (and then lead him over to look at it as you tell him).

That really helped after a little bit. He really started to catch on.

The other thing I told him when he struggled during diaper changes was to inform him "You know, if you put your poop in the potty instead of your diaper, it will be a lot easier to wipe your bum. I won't have to change your diaper or wipe your bum if you put your poop in the potty."

That helped too.

I was careful not to shame him, but to tell him calmly (sometimes I'd allow myself to show a little irritation) and just simply tell him what special opportunity he had to do something right. Sometimes I would ask him "Is the floor the right place to put pee or poop?" He learned to say that it was not the right place and then I'd ask where the right place to put it was and he would say potty.

I know its frustrating, but you can teach him and he can learn where the right place is to poop or pee. Good luck!


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