I started EC with DS (now 5) when he was 2 months old, he would pee/pooh on cue by 5 months old (part time as I had a full time job and he was in daycare). Never had intuition, just went by timing. Fast forward to DD, I started EC casually when she was a few days old. No job now, so I EC full time. She is now 5 months and I still miss a LOT. Examples:
--I ask her to go (several times for about 3 minutes), she won't go for me yet she'll go a few minutes later or within 10 minutes
--We are going somewhere, and if she hasn't peed recently I'll try and see if she has to go before we leave so she doesn't have to sit in the carseat in a wet dipe. More often than not, she pees after we leave so she ends up sitting in a wet dipe.
There has only been 2 times where my lap felt warm and she did have to go, this was when she was younger (DH had this happen also). Sometimes I look back and can see the fussing, but other times it seems she doesn't fuss or flinch at all. She is CD'd so I do notice she will fuss after she's wet, but if I don't notice it right away she gives up fussing.
I really thought I would have had the communication down by now :(
I'm also catching less poohs than I used to. She does go more often in the morning and less at night.
I'm pretty sure most of it has to do with my ADHD/inattentive status. I just have a really hard time with it, it's been 5 months now and when she fusses my first thought is still generally not 'oh she might have to pee'.
Unfortunately, she has bad diaper rash for 3 months which is likely yeast, so the sooner I can get a handle on the communication, the better.
I normally potty her over the sink or in a BBLP, and occassionally outside. About a month ago I also started using the potty sign. I cue her 'ssssss, go potty' and when she does go, I praise her but don't go overboard.
DS 2006 DiaperFreeBaby March 2010, DD 2011
Diaper rash for 3 months seems like a lot for a little one to go through. Is it possible she is just not very comfortable down there? There was a period when DS' poos were very watery (and I think hurt a bit) and he really hated going on the toilet (I think he wanted the emotional and physical comfort of just being in my arms and going in the diaper, so we did, and then when a few days later when poos were back to a normal consistency, he was happy to go on the toilet again). I think you're right - resolving the rash/yeast problem might just do the trick.
If you think part of your problem is remembering to offer potty breaks, perhaps writing it on your hand? "POTTY?"
I definitely had to get into the habit of "1 - hungry? 2 - potty? 3 - just want to be in arms/tired?"
DS has moved from fussing to squealing when he wants to pee so sometimes I think he's just really excited about playing, and then miss one. Your DDs cues could be switchin too? possibly?
Hope you figure something out.
Whenever I get a little frustrated with ec we abandon ship (it's generally just a few hours or a day). I refuse to let ecing cause any anxiety between DS and I. It's about communicating and being insync with each other. The minute I get irritated with him or myself, the nappi goes on and I just relax (usually I'll still know within a minute or two when he's gone and change him immediately).
Sometimes all it takes is a little pressure for me to over-analyze (and cause some anxiety) and confuse the whole process for both of us...
Good luck Ophelia,
covert crunchy wife to & mama to DS02/11. Dreaming of travelling the as soon as we catch up on some