Increasing communication - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 05-31-2012, 05:59 PM - Thread Starter
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DD is 13 months and we've been ECing since she was 2 weeks. Going well - it's a process. We were down to one miss a day, but that fluctuates a bit now depending on things, and now that she is mobile (not walking but a big crawler!) My question is about communication or signalling. DD doesn't sign, or indicate she needs to go....basically, I potty her fairly frequently. Admittedly sometimes I just think "she probably has to go" and maybe there is some unconscious communication going on, but nothing really obvious. Just wondering if anybody has any hints as to how I can increase the chance that she might signal her need. (would especially love this for DH...) 

I signal vocally by either "ssss" or, when I needed to change that up since she was resisting, an audible sigh, but of course she knows the position and rarely needs prompting like this. I've been trying to remember to use hand signals....I may not have been very diligent about that. She sometimes copies me when I do it, though it seems more about the sign than going potty, but maybe that's a start. And I also talk a lot about "going potty" and tell her we are going, and that she went....and I know she understands. She is not much of a fan of the potty now - prefers the toilet, sink, or outside. I know some people talk about their child crawling towards the, she does crawl towards it, but mainly to explore. (oh, and she wants to GET INTO the toilet....;)) Though now that I'm thinking about it, maybe if we had more regular potty places that would be better?

It would be awesome if she could signal. Sometimes I wonder if I potty her fairly often she doesn't have to bother about signalling? (though we still get misses, so it's not like we're going all the time)

Anyway, I love EC and I think it has been great so far, I'm just wondering if there is anything else I can do to increase our communication.


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#2 of 3 Old 06-01-2012, 05:20 AM
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Hmm... I don't have much wisdom to offer, except that sometimes a signal seems completely unrelated to the potty. My 14 month old and I are totally out of sync some days and make only one (or zero) catch. Other days it seems to click and we have 4 or 5 catches (along with at least that many misses). On the good days I think I tune in better. Often a slight fussing is asking for the potty as is reaching up to be picked up. I was never consistent with signing but I talk her ear off about the potty: how mommy has to potty and daddy is going potty and look kitty is running to his potty lol. If you take her on a schedule and it's getting you only one miss a day then I would stick to that. Maybe those times you think she should go you are actually picking up on some cue from her. See if you can spot something she does or some look she has at those times. I don't think timing is a bad thing at all. You will probably have to remind her every now and then even when she's 4 years old ;-)
You're doing great!! I'm still washing about a dozen dipes a day lol.
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#3 of 3 Old 06-02-2012, 04:26 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks! Oh, and I'm washing diapers (or trainers, and pants....) because we go through lots of times when things are just off. But I do know that we CAN catch most of the time. Thank goodness for this forum to remind me that it isn't a steady progression and can be all over the place (ha! sometimes literally!) and things will change. just wanted to be sure I wasn't getting in a rut or being complacent when maybe I could  be doing something, you know?

and you are right - i often notice after a miss that she was fussing or wanting to be picked up....and I was saying "mummy just has to put this in the oven and then I'll play with you" only to realize she was probably saying "I have to pee!" so I'm trying to respond quickly with the potty if she fusses! (or go outside. but we just got goats and now when we go outside she just wants to see them...;))

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Elimination Communication

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