am i doing the right thing?? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 03-15-2003, 12:16 AM - Thread Starter
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Aidan is almost 13 months old, and we have been ECing/early potty "training" for about 3 weeks. we are using the EC method (fun, no punishment or anything of the sorts), but due to his "advanced age" , i hesitate calling it "EC".

things are going well, but i have some concerns.

firstly, i want Aidan to be comfortable, this means a couple of things. i do not want him sitting in his own filth, and i would like him to be "trained" as early as possible, to avoid the dipes. of course if he is more comfortable in dipes (which he is not), that too is fine w/me. its all about the boy

we go diaperless, mainly it causes me to be more on the ball, and is tons easier, than removing clothes or even a diaper.

being that he is so old, he really doesn't signal much when he has to pee. sometimes he is aware of it, mostly he is not. i'm finding his pattern and am putting him on the potty when he "should" have to go. i also rely (or need to rely) on intuition. my intuition of when he has to go is quite accurate.

okay, i'm quite tired , and feel i'm not getting to my point, sorry ladies

regardless, w/him being nudie, he does pee on the floor on occassion. no problem w/me or hubby, but when i miss these pees, does it confuse him? and when we go out and i put him in a diaper, doesn't that confuse him as well?? i guess my big question is, is starting EC so late going to be detrimental to him in some way? i'm just trying to do right by him, and worry that maybe i'm doing more harm than good.

thanks for listening to my ramble, maybe i should go to bed and think it over

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#2 of 2 Old 03-15-2003, 01:08 AM
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When he goes, make a cue noise, or say a specific phrase:

"oh, you peed!"

"ppssss psssss"

And then you can say nothing at all, or you could say "next time you need to go pee, if you let me know, I'll take you to the potty and we can put pee in there"

My ds will run for a towel to help me clean up any misses, he loves being helpful and since there is no shame or even really annoyance at misses (yay! hardwood!) it's a fun thing for us to clean up together.

If you diaper him, and he goes in the diaper, make the same noise and comment. He will figure out that when he has that peeing sensation there is a certain noise that happens... and eventually will connect the two... learning to relax his bladder when he hears that noise later on as you cue him.

The thing that damages children is harsh punishment and annoyance and making them feel bad about their bodily functions. Positive communication and careful attending to their signals are not damaging.

And it's helpful to remember that the overwhelming majority of humans who ever lived were "trained" using some form of EC.... probably if you stay relaxed and connected, things will flow (ha ha) just fine. :-)



P.S. go ahead and call it EC... you are communicating about his elimination, yes? You're not just ignoring or being unaware of his elimination patterns and signals.
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