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Uncirc'd and wondering...

1K views 13 replies 9 participants last post by  littlest birds 
#1 ·
Before I started EC with DS (I EC'd DD starting at 3 months, and everyone was amazed when, at 18 months, she could completely take care of her potty needs--except wiping after BMs), I had heard that little boys were easier to EC than little girls, because when they need to pee, there should be some sign of an erection. Here's where I'm having a problem. DS is uncirc'd and not having that EC signal. He's not showing any other signals, so I just kind of wing it (which is working out okay so far, but he's still not dedicated to it like DD was at his age). Anywho, I was wondering if it was just a random thing, or if other parents of uncirc'd boys were having the same experience.
 
#2 ·
It is pretty standard around here (mdc) to prefer the term 'intact' instead of uncircumcised.

My son is intact and when he was that little he occasionally got erections before he peed, but not always. More often he would just look 'fuller' or maybe it can be described as 'ballooning' a bit just before he peed. As in JUST before.

I think it pretty much is individual and not at all related to the status of their penis.

Good luck!

Jessica
 
#3 ·
How long have you been ECing for??

The pp is right in that it's not so much erect, but just fuller. I didn't notice it at first, but it's a dead giveaway now. Not to say that it's always like that when he needs to pee, but when it is like that I can almost guarantee he has to go.

I don't think the state or existance of the foreskin would make much of a difference (my guy's intact too just for the record).
 
#4 ·
I didn't ec my boys (I'm waiting to see if this babe is a boy or a girl) but I just wanted to add that intact boys do get that kind of 'full' look before they are going to pee.

I have never seen a non-intact baby - thank goodness.

I really hope that one day people will no longer be able to worry about the differences between an intact baby boy and one who is not intact.

Your child is normal and anything that happens to his penis is normal.
 
#5 ·
Adding my 2 cents even though MT is circed, and he gets a very full look, but not necessarily erect, when he needs to pee. Because I can see the tip of the penis, I often notice a difference in it's appearance as well right before he pees. Added bonus of having a boy I guess, regardless of the state of his penis.
 
#6 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by orangefoot
I really hope that one day people will no longer be able to worry about the differences between an intact baby boy and one who is not intact.
Oh, I'm not worried, I was just wondering. The idea (which was hard to convey while holding such a squirmy little guy) behind the OP was to glean information from other EC mommas if this was something that they had encountered as well, and if there was some other bodily signal to look for in it's stead (like do his ears wiggle right before?
).

Thanks for your input ladies!
 
#7 ·
Other signals: Spuratic eye-rubbing (rarely means he's tired, almost always means he's ready to/is pee/ing), pausing to look down at himself, squirming when being worn, timing....
 
#8 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by orangefoot
I didn't ec my boys (I'm waiting to see if this babe is a boy or a girl) but I just wanted to add that intact boys do get that kind of 'full' look before they are going to pee.

I have never seen a non-intact baby - thank goodness.

I really hope that one day people will no longer be able to worry about the differences between an intact baby boy and one who is not intact.

Your child is normal and anything that happens to his penis is normal.
I hope my response here doesn't stray too far from the OP, but your comment that you're thankful you've never seen a circumcised baby boy bothers me. I have circ'ed boys - I'd do things differently knowing what I do now, but the past is unchangeable. That said, why be so thankful you've not met a circ'ed baby? They're exactly the same as intact boys in every other way. There's nothing wrong with them, nothing icky or sad. They just happen to be circumcised. And you might get a chance to meet the mommy, and you'd find out that she's not so bad herself.
 
#9 ·
To answer the OP, you may also look for more tightness and roundness in the testicles as well as the penis. I can easily tell when my ds has to go just by looking, because everything is tight and high. After he goes everything is droopy. He also gets the ballooning of the foreskin the second before he pees. At 8 months he has also begun grabbing himself and sometimes vocalizing when he has to go.
I don't want to get in the middle of the side discussion, just to point out that some who could never imagine circing may feel heartfelt regret that, with more information, parents of circed boys may have made a different choice.
Warmly,
 
#11 ·
Rachel, not to worrry, I wasn't offended, just a little bothered by the statement, if you can see the difference. I've spent some time on the circ forum, and I've wandered back away b/c I've read far too many posts that read like yours - "I hope I never have to see a boy with a cut penis", or what have you. I do regret my decision to have the boys circumcised, but I do think that parents of intact boys could be a bit more aware of what they're saying. Kids are kids, and what their penis looks like is irrelevant in the overall scope of things. In fact, you yourself said it best when you commented that you hope one day people won't be concerned at all with the differences! So not to worry, no offense taken.
 
#14 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by bdavis337

Quote:

Originally Posted by orangefoot
I didn't ec my boys (I'm waiting to see if this babe is a boy or a girl) but I just wanted to add that intact boys do get that kind of 'full' look before they are going to pee.

I have never seen a non-intact baby - thank goodness.

I hope my response here doesn't stray too far from the OP, but your comment that you're thankful you've never seen a circumcised baby boy bothers me. I have circ'ed boys - I'd do things differently knowing what I do now, but the past is unchangeable. That said, why be so thankful you've not met a circ'ed baby? They're exactly the same as intact boys in every other way. There's nothing wrong with them, nothing icky or sad. They just happen to be circumcised. And you might get a chance to meet the mommy, and you'd find out that she's not so bad herself.

When I see a circumsized penis, I feel pain. I don't dislike the child at all, but if I do see their penis, it does bother me. It brings up a very deep hurt on behalf of so many people who have been harmed by this practice.

On that level, what is wrong with being relieved to have not had this experience? What is wrong with being glad all the babies she's seen have been intact? That makes me happy. She gets to see intact babies. All those babies have escaped being circ'd--Yay! Maybe she knows LOTS of intact kids. Good for every single one of them! She has plenty to be thankful for.

There is something sad. And they don't "happen" to be circ'd. This was a choice made for them by the community and by their parents. Still, I don't think you or the friends I have who circ'd are bad people. Especially not if they wish they hadn't or just didn't know to question that. They made a mistake. There are so many ways people end up making that choice. Each story of circ is different, with influences of powerful and subtle social cues and misinformation and, often, simply quickly-decided responses to a seemingly simple question made in the whirlwind aftermath of a birth experience.
 
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