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#31 of 43 Old 08-11-2006, 06:12 PM
 
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Wow, this thread really makes me feel a lot better. I don't know if this will come across right but I almost feel like some of the pressure is off of me as a midwife, if that makes sense. Like I don't have to have rote memory of the delivery maneuvers or worry that my perineal support is failing. My training puports itself to be hands off but really it's pretty hands on... I think I need to unlearn all of that business.

Amy: Certified Professional Midwife and mom to Max (11) and Stella (6).
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#32 of 43 Old 08-11-2006, 06:39 PM
 
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fourlittlebirds, that is totally awesome, how better a world this could be if everybody was born with such love:to know that birth like yours happens is truly enlightening.
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#33 of 43 Old 08-11-2006, 06:55 PM
 
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I would love to catch my baby! I have birthed 2 on hands and knees, and hadn't crossed my mind to catch- I am wondering now how I would be able to. A part of that is most likely since there was someone there to catch- if I was UC, of course I'd have to figure something else out LOL. Something to think on, that is for sure, because how great that would be to catch!!

I did touch DC#2 as she was crowning- amazingly no one else (DH, doula, nurses, doc, etc.) noticed. It is a very special moment for me between just DC and me (not that she remembers LOL). My MW asked me if I wanted to touch DC#3 at crowning and I said no. I did, but wanted to keep that a unique thing between DC2 and me. Sounds kinda silly in print, but it really meant and still means a lot to me. I didn't explain to MW at the time (I was a bit busy lol); now I wonder what she may be thinking about why I didn't (well, not now, I'm sure she's long since forgotten ).

DH has expressed in the past that he just wants the baby out, the whole thing done and over with. Doesn't want to catch, cut the cord, doesn't even want to watch the actual emergence. I think I'll ask him if he would consider catching this time since it is most likely our last time.
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#34 of 43 Old 08-12-2006, 02:00 AM
 
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I mostly caught my last son. I was having a really hard time staying calm while pushing. I couldn't seem to focus at all and the pain was getting away from me.
My mw told me to reach down and feel his head. I dont think I responded at first but she told me again to feel the head so I could gauge how to push. After she said why to feel his head I found my focus again the pain seemed to be manageable again. It was like I could see what was happening through my hands. Like I could see from a different perspective then from my eyes that were so far away from what was going on. I think my eyes were closed most of the time yet when I recall his birth I see images that I saw with my hands. It sounds really cool as i write this!!!

After his head was out I just waited to push again and I reached down and grabbed under his arms and pulled him up to my chest. It was so beautiful. I dont remember thinking about what I was doing. I felt very comfortable with my MW and nurse. I didnt even consider what I was supposed to do or allowed to do I just did what felt right and they were there to cheer me on.

I do remember now that Norla put a warm wet cloth on my perenium and I felt her hand with mine while I was feeling babies head and touching her hand was comforting as well. I dont know if what Norla did or what I did was what kept me from tearing but I know that it felt right and I didnt tear.

I hope to catch the next babe as well!
~Angela~
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#35 of 43 Old 08-12-2006, 12:25 PM
 
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I strongly beliveve that birth is a private sexual, intmate event between a husband and wife. I strongly believe that relationships would be better if the two people who truly loved this child being the first to welcome it in the world in the same room where it was concieved(?spelling?). Michael Odent once said "the best place to give birth is the best place to make love". The media portrays birth as something other than sexual to justify what they do to women. For the most part what probably goes on in hospitals is constipated childbirth, women were designed to give birth in privacy away from everyone. Birth uses the same hormones the same body parts as sex does so how can we ever expect women to successfully birth their children in an enviroment other than that of making love, and I srongly believe she can't. 1 in 4 births in this county are c-sections and the major reason for them is failure to progress and it goes back to being in the wrong enviroment. Doctors interfere with all these dangerous interventions to speed it up and control it and when they can't do that they can just give you a c-section. Labor and birth was never meant to be medicalized. Mother nature is smart she knows what she is doing,but we do not give her chance.
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#36 of 43 Old 08-12-2006, 01:07 PM
 
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freebirth2 I can see a lot of good sense in your post and I agree with your thoughts, even if a woman does not have a loving partner she is still capable of having a loving birth. I would have very much liked to have this kind of birth where the couple(if applicable)were able to tune into a loving experience, didn't quite happen that way for me, I mean I'm on my own now so our relationship wasn't solid. I also reckon relationships could benefit greatly from the experience, have always wanted to explore more angles during birth than just the concept of delivery. UC made my life a better place to be. I am one of those women who had to do it alone for so many reasons. My reasons are stuff like empowerment, am nervous and unable to birth in medicalized environments(happily) an intense love of nature and the natural rythyms and just a very personal choice that I did'nt want others around. Not every woman wants that and I think we should all birth how we wish imo humans are becoming very detached from the natural flow and don't want to be a part of it, that is so sad and I can't help but get angry over the years that my birthing choices, amongst other life choices, are ridiculed as over the top or summit daft or worse that I am a selfish woman who cares more more my own welfare than that of my unborn child. All irrelevant to me now I can say. I think I just have more faith in women and natural processes than most and I have seen it pay off. It would be interesting to know what women really think of birth and what they would like to achieve as the domesticated version of childbirth doesn't appear that safe , would it be possible for more women to take back some birth power if they are scared of it, and that fear is peddalled by the medics to insure imo that they are justified in their actions ie mass medicalised birth. Constipated birth- excellent description, just how I felt.
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#37 of 43 Old 08-12-2006, 01:28 PM
 
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Indeed as complications do occur and many women are rushed in for c-secs and other highly stressful interventions, I do wonder if pregnancy were a more relaxed,woman directed affair instead of the risk assessment that so many women are assessed for, would perhaps birth be less likely to develop into complication in the first place in some births(whether actual real complications or hazardous guesswork with no actual proof of complication other than scare-mongering,unenlightened docs ) would a heck of a lot of women who have c-secs and other interventions actually have been able to birth their babies safely? As we wouldn't know the result till after the fact I reckon there is a fair amount of bullying and downright ignorance involved in a womans imminent right to birth. I would have had a hard time had I had complications during birth and have many friends who have had emergency c-secs and am in no way saying that real complications do not occur,am thinking more on the way these are dealt with. Hang on what am I saying!? I had my 2nd dd by uc at 7 months, it was touch and go around the 5th month and I sure could have done with some non-invasive help, my cervix was real sore and I couldn't walk very well for months, same leg thing with 3rd ds but not so bad so I guess it wasn't that straightforward, I am prone to forget.Have had a slipped disc since then but have had back-work done thankfully.
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#38 of 43 Old 08-14-2006, 05:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the replies, I guess I just always thought it was instinctual to reach down and catch your baby.
I dont remember giving a crap what anyone thought about me providing my own perineal support.

Christa
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#39 of 43 Old 08-14-2006, 05:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pamamidwife

I wrote an article for MT about this topic that I posted here originally. Women push more instinctively when they're focused on their body/baby and not looking to someone else for direction. They push enough to bring the baby down slowly - and they often can feel how far down each push brings the baby. Not every woman touches their baby's head as it is coming, but I can tell you she definitely won't be reaching for it instinctively if someone else is there touching her!

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Do you have a link for the article you've written Pam? Or any articles you've written?
Thanks!

Christa
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#40 of 43 Old 08-14-2006, 05:56 PM
 
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http://www.midwifemama.com/honoring.html

bouncin a toddler and typing w one hand .....
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#41 of 43 Old 08-15-2006, 12:41 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pamamidwife
In the water, I don't see the heads - I can't even write "position of baby at delivery" on my summary forms.
Thanks for writing that Pam. Because I still don't know exactly how Audrey came out. I suspect anterior with nuchal hand/fist but because it was a waterbirth and I just chose a position and pushed it was fine. I remember the apprentice checking for baby's head or maybe trying to provide perineal support but it went fast and i'm not sure. : You know what? It doesn't matter... except that I would like to smugly say that my petite self birthed a 41 weeker with a nuchal hand/arm/fist without tearing (granted she was only a petite 7lb 6oz) . I didn't exactly catch her since she sprung out once her shoulder freed, she did hit the bottom of the pool but a visit to the chiro fixed her up.

I must say your philosophy of not offering perineal support is ringing true to me and I imagine I'll be carrying that along with me whenever I get the change to assist/apprentice.
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#42 of 43 Old 08-15-2006, 01:12 AM
 
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I just have to chime in that I think you all are awsome. I have written before of having tooooo many people present at my homebirth, and although I touched myself and my baby whenever I wanted I was in my head a lot of the time. I am an aspiring midwife.....Im a wannabe Pam and I don't even know you! I didn't get turned onto UC and Michel Odent/Janine Pavrati Baker/Laura Shanley and the likes until after my dd was born, if there is a next time it will most certainly be UC.

On the mw offering perineal support....all I can think of is Barbra Harper at a Water Birth conf quoting some Jamacian mw's she had interviewed and spent time with....."Keepa da hands offaaa da baybeee Mon!"
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#43 of 43 Old 08-15-2006, 04:17 AM
 
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I always knew that I wanted to catch my own baby, but my midwife didn't seem very supportive. During the actual birth, she kept trying to touch me, I think to provide perineal support. I kept telling her to get her hands off of me, but I think she just thought I was a woman in pain talking. I was very serious, not really in pain, and I wanted her away from me! She told my dh to catch the baby but then I just put my hands down there and they all backed off. I provided my own support and pulled her out of the water.

I'm SO glad that I did that. I didn't tear, and without being able to feel with my hands, I really think that I would have.

Oh, and I just wanted to add that I was feeling for her long before crowning. I couldn't wait to touch her head!
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