Thanks so much for the replys. I did recieve a reply also from the professional herbalist from Herblore.com and she said No milk thistle could not have caused this defect, like ya'll said too. She said milk thistle, dandelion, and Yellow dock are all good liver herbs and safe for pregnancy.
I also recieved an email from a women who has taken a large amount of milk thistle every day for years, through pregnancies and breastfeeding---all the time. She said her babies were fine.
The milk thistle product was a phytosome meaning it was bound to another substance and was more bio-available to the body, and absorbed more milk thistle than normal crude m-th herb.
I also think maybe taking the milk thistle ALL the time and well BEFORE pregnancy, might cut down on any toxins being dumped. We dont plan to TTC until 9 months+ so I feel like for the most part the detox will be over with until Im pregnant (If I get preg, Lord willing) and if I want to take it during pregnancy to maintain my liver health, then it will be good that I had started it almost 10 months before so the detox will mostly be over with and the milk thistle will be ok for pregnancy too.
I read that Milk thistle is NOT embryo-toxic. So that right there tells you that the milk thistle probably did not cause the defect.