How to make this work? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 12-29-2008, 04:58 PM - Thread Starter
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H and I just separated a few days ago and although we are getting along really well, I don't know how to get what I need out of this. Our kids are really young (1 and 3) so they still really need both of us a lot of the time. I don't know how to get the space I need from H and still put the kids first. I don't want to be married to him anymore, but it just kills me to think of the kids not being able to see either of us all the time. I have not been getting the space I need to get my head straightened out. He's a good person and a good dad, but we are a terrible match and we are past the point that counselling would help (I'm planning to get some on my own, though). I am just done and don't want to make it work. I'm a really peaceful person and am this conflict just cuts me to the core, and am dealing with a lot of guilt about being "the bad guy" in this. Anyway, I'm just looking for some advice from you mamas who have been there. Thanks
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#2 of 3 Old 12-29-2008, 05:11 PM
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(((sending hugs))) you seem really mature, and if he's a good dad you should be able to figure things out. Transitions take time...
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#3 of 3 Old 12-29-2008, 09:17 PM
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i have no advice because i'm a failure at what you're trying to do.
but if you both have your babies best interests in mind you will do the right thing.

good luck
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