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#61 of 105 Old 03-10-2009, 04:30 PM
 
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Butterfly: The amount of dating you do is - wow! Do the guys know of your "multiple-booking"? I know I would be LIVID if I found out a guy I was going out with - even casually - was seing other women as well. I actually doubt I would want to pursue a relationship with someone who was going out with others same time as seing me. Especially if we were intimate kwim. I know if my guy had done that - I would really not consider him serious relationship material. But I guess this is a very grey zone where in the end it's all about personal preference..
: Especially the bolded parts.

Honestly, ButterflyMama, it doesn't appear that you are looking for a relationship at all... long-distance or otherwise.

From all of your posts, it feels ...at least to me... that you are trying to cover some serious issues/pain/hurt/etc with all of these men. I have read your previous thread about your X and children. I cannot possibly even fathom how traumatic such an experience could be. I am wondering how much of an impact that experience is having on you... emotionally speaking.

It is as though you are getting a 'high' from those beginning moments with a new person, which is allowing you to not deal with (or hide from) what is really hurting within yourself.

I don't know. The people I have met that date as you are currently dating, multiple men/women, double booking, etc, have ALL been trying to escape from something that is troubling them. They have all been people who are looking for someone to fill a desperate need.

I guess I am just trying to say... please take care of yourself and be conscious of what is happening within.
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#62 of 105 Old 03-10-2009, 04:31 PM
 
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Will I ever meet a man that I feel is worth the trouble?
Yep, when you are ready.
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#63 of 105 Old 03-10-2009, 04:43 PM
 
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butterfly, I totally do NOT do LDR. My exBF from last year lived 60 miles away and that was way too far and made things very difficult, even though it was less than an hour drive most of the time. and yes, I do think a person's space has a lot to do with who they are. Oh, I MUST send you a copy of the Four Man Plan, I finally got mine a couple of weeks ago and I think you'll love it. Seriously, it's funny and so accurate and it's really put me in such a different head space about dating. It's all about working on YOU and your issues about men and relationships, while keeping things light and empowering. I wish I'd read it before I started dating again, it would have been so much easier for me.

I haven't dated at all for a while. My FWB has been out of town for the last 3 weekends and, to be honest, I don't especially miss him. I've been in a weird space since I was sick last month and lately a box of ThinMint Girl Scout cookies and a video has been more appealing than a date, lol!

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YoungMan (6/00) & LittleBoy (6/04)
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#64 of 105 Old 03-10-2009, 05:13 PM
 
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Does seeing a man's home/how he lives also affect you guys in the same way or even slightly similar way? It's not just the size/extravagance of the lifestyle but also just how they take care of their space, how they plan how to make the most of their space, etc....that affects me. Your home is kind of a representation of yourself and it helps me to paint a more accurate picture of someone, in some sense.... If someone had a very modest, simple, small apartment but then really made the most of the space and it was very cleverly planned out and kept neat and attractive, even on a tight budget, i'd still feel like I enjoy being there. It's just when it's a messy, dumpy, sloppy, un-planned out one room apartment, I sort of raise my eyebrows and wonder how mature the person is who lives there, and how much they even really value themselves if they put so little effort into their personal space.
The care that goes into someone's home has an impact on my perception, less than size or economic status - same as you. I mean, don't get me wrong... it might be distasteful, but I work as a professional, own my own home and vehicle, and have two small girls. At this stage in my life, I don't think I'd be willing to date a starving artist.

All that aside, after I finish working through everything with my therapist (she recommends taking one year to yourself for every five of a relationship - which brings me to about 1.75 years) I'm going to date women exclusively for a bit.

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#65 of 105 Old 03-10-2009, 05:46 PM
 
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I guess I am just trying to say... please take care of yourself and be conscious of what is happening within.
Oh, I'm very conscious of what is going on within me. I just don't talk about anything except my dating life on this thread. But briefly, I've had my entire life turned upside down and uprooted six months ago and I'm focusing and sharpening my attention on trying to do everything I can to win my sons when we go to court. In the meantime, I get exhausted and pretty down being isolated in a foreign country with such big tasks set in front of me, and I let those emotions out, I cry, and I grieve for the loss of these months with my kids,a nd I let the feelings wash over me. But I dont' want to wallow. And getting out often and learning the city, and trying to loosen up a bit and not just focus on serious, grave, real problems every minute of the day seems to help me get balance and helps me to remember that at least now I'm not under the thumb of a tyrant who never let me out of his sight and kept me nearly imprisoned for the bulk of my twenties. Now if I want to go out dancing or go on a date, I go out and do it, and it's pretty empowering after an abusive, prison-of-a-marriage. So, if I'm a little light and cavalier about it, that's possible.... but not the most unhealthy thing, all in all, I think. I'm isolated in a cold, dark foreign country,a nd spending all my time cut off from other people since I have no friends and family here would be unhealthy. I can't spend all my time alone, so what I do is I go out and meet new girlfriends and new guys to go out on dates with (if they interest me), and try to have people to talk to, start establishing some friendships that hopefully at least some will last. This is my city, this is the country I have to live in for the coming 15 years most likely and I don't know anyone in this part of the world besides my abusive ex, so I'm just trying to get control of my life and establish myself and meet people and be social, because sitting alone in my apartment would be nuts, and not help my custody case, either (I especially target mother friends with kids the same age range, so I can arrange playdates for the boys when they are with me and can start establishing their circle of friends that I have to offer them in my home/neighborhood, for the benefit of my case for custody).

Mostly I'm auditioning to find one guy in this city that I actually really like spending time with, and actually can loosen up and start to speak Finnish with nearly every day, to propel my fluency for my custody case. If I fall in love and it pans out to be a long term partner, great. The reason I'm treating every man in this town like they are disposable is because they are, to me. None of them have touched me inside in any way, and my heart has felt nothing truly special for any of them yet. And i'm aware of that. When the right one comes along,, everyone else will be instantly dropped from the scene and it will be just him from then on out, as far as it goes.
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#66 of 105 Old 03-11-2009, 07:52 AM
 
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Butterfly: I know you know what you are doing You are an intelligent woman and you seem perfectly capable to handle your very difficult situation. Emotionally as well.
Lots a love

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#67 of 105 Old 03-11-2009, 11:25 AM
 
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Butterflymom you seem to be making the most out of life and i admire that! I would be doing the same if i wasn't pregnant! After getting out of my marriage i knew it was better for me to date around and really find someone who fit into my life the best. I have a tendency to settle with men and get attached quickly. I wanted to break that mold by doing something differently. It was hard for me to date multiple men and i did find myself getting attached here and there, but breaking outside of my box made me more empowered. Do whatever feels right to you.
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#68 of 105 Old 03-11-2009, 11:37 AM
 
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Butterflymom

I haven't been keeping up much this month... still with my guy, things are going well. Just a lot going on in life right now.

Hope you're all doing well.
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#69 of 105 Old 03-11-2009, 11:45 AM
 
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I spoke with my guy on the phone yesterday, and he (accidentally?) revealed that he has applyed for jobs abroad
He hasn't made any choices yet, so for now I will postpone worrying too much. He still seems as attached to me as I am to him - it just upset me. He does need an income and cant stay in his current position for much longer- and job situation here is - well the amount of jobs that fit his profile are limited.
Anyway nomatter how you turn it around I was hurt that he would consider moving abroad again. But well as long as he hasnt actually made the choice to move I will give him time to decide on his own.
Im just - on one hand very certain that he wont actually do it, on the other hand - nervous.

We are meeting up tomorrow to go swimming with my kids. Looking forward to seeing him big time - and he revealed on the phone yesterday that he can hardly wait to see me. That is a first time he is so direct about actually missing me, so I do find it hard to believe he would throw this away over a job opportunity.
We'll see..

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#70 of 105 Old 03-11-2009, 02:45 PM
 
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Butterflymom you seem to be making the most out of life and i admire that! I would be doing the same if i wasn't pregnant! After getting out of my marriage i knew it was better for me to date around and really find someone who fit into my life the best.
: I'm just kinda doing an auditioning process/kissin' frogs to see which ones may be really right, not just 'right now' or the one who is really sure about ME; and I end up getting mired down with someone who isn't really a great fit.


Thanks for the support, to all you guys.
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#71 of 105 Old 03-11-2009, 04:15 PM
 
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I spoke with my guy on the phone yesterday, and he (accidentally?) revealed that he has applyed for jobs abroad
I really hope that he is able to stay.
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#72 of 105 Old 03-13-2009, 04:45 PM
 
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Finally went on a date.

It was amazing.

I think waiting almost a year was the right thing to do.

Just...wow.

Busy, hectic, HAPPY single mom to 3 awesome kiddos jumpers.gif DD1 (10) DS (8) DD2 (6)

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#73 of 105 Old 03-13-2009, 06:17 PM
 
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Finally went on a date.

It was amazing.

I think waiting almost a year was the right thing to do.

Just...wow.
: I need to learn from lah7 about how to make my points clear and concise and to the point. : Girl, you're my hero in terms of that.


Seriously though, I'd love half a detail or maybe an entire detail. What was so great about it? :
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#74 of 105 Old 03-13-2009, 08:43 PM
 
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Finally went on a date.

It was amazing.

I think waiting almost a year was the right thing to do.

Just...wow.
It sounds great. I felt the same way when I first started to date again.
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#75 of 105 Old 03-13-2009, 09:47 PM
 
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Not sure if I belong in this "group" seeing as my DP lives with Ds and I? But here I am

I started seeing him over the summer and we did move fast but it just happened. He is the first person I dated/been with since X. It took me almost 5 years to trust myself and anyone else. X was abusive so I didn't trust at all. Dp is wonderful with Ds and me. My family actually likes him We never really fight and he respects me and Ds and the way I parent it is new to him as the people he knows with children are way too mainstream for me and seem to be for him also since I came around

I haven't read all the posts well none at all yet I will soon though!

Glenn bouncy.gif 11*09 Joe 4*04 peace.gif Me praying.gif & Hubby geek.gif

 

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#76 of 105 Old 03-14-2009, 12:39 AM
 
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Dating has left much to be desired for me, so back to the drawing board.

Former dreads.gifwearing, treehugger.gifing, pole dancing, read.gifpushing, ribbonpurple.gifsurvivor & single mama extraordinaire to energy.gif.  

Now that's a mouthful!!! computergeek2.gif & follow it!   

 

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#77 of 105 Old 03-14-2009, 05:11 PM
 
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BMJ - What is back to the drawing board? Perhaps I should join you?

Not doing much here. No potentials, no first dates, nada. Well, except my xbf that asked me out two weeks ago and I may just go out with him for some entertainment and um, sex!

Butterfly mom - I cannot even begin to imagine what it feels like to be you. On the EOW that my kidlets are gone, I feel so alone and incomplete. Don't misunderstand me. I am my own person w/o my kids but they are such a part of WHO I am. And I am in my country of origin and have friends & family that visits. Part of my coping is to stay busy and social too.
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#78 of 105 Old 03-15-2009, 05:18 AM
 
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Finally went on a date.

It was amazing.

I think waiting almost a year was the right thing to do.

Just...wow.
Tell more will ya! What was it like - was he sweet - or was it the dating in itself that was awesome. Are we talking relationship material?

Sunshinesally: Welcome - you wont be the first coupled mama to hang around here I guess as long as you dont mind reading about everyones dating adventures and give a hug here and there you are more than welcome Not sure how long you even qualify as a dating mama? I didnt exactly get around to date much before I joined - saw one guy a few times and got dumped, then met current guy who is the man of my dreams :

Odjmama: - A mama has needs too doesnt she

Here BF came around on friday as usual. I cooked him a curry - he loves curries and he appreciated it so much. He is a great person to cook for for sure. On saturday my parents came by briefly and didnt exactly act polite They came in, shook hands and then started babbling on about their own issues, pretty much ignoring his presence. I was really disappointed in them - they are usually easy people to be around. Well at least they weren't hostile or anything - I just thought it would have been polite to show a bit of interest in him. He ofcourse pinpointed them very exactly after they left. He is so freakin sharp it takes my breat away sometimes - Im thrilled. He notices stuff like my dad being a very "dominant male" kind of personality - something I knew but have never been able to pinpoint the behaviour. Well my guy noticed the way he shook hands (holding his hand in such a way BF would have to put his hand underneath my dads to shake it - a typical "alfa-male" way to shake hands) as well as his body language (closed attitude - hands across chest etc) My mom avoided eye contact the entire time.. I guess they are being a bit protective of me and nervous that I may get hurt - but still - good manners arent too much to ask are they

Had a great time with BF as usual. We managed - again - to talk through difficult subjects in a very pleasent way. One importent topic being - children .. I very very much want more children. I am pretty much 100% sure I want more children - where as he is "a bit" traumatized by having lost two children - and a stepdaughter that he raised most of her life and isn't certain he wants more. I dont know how much to push the subject right now - it feels like I should wait and not take it up now. But - on the other hand I dont want to find out 3 years from now that he doestn want children after all. I kind of trust that once he knows me better and trusts out relationship to be for a lifetime he will soften up to the idea of children - his main fear being to father another child/children that he wont be able to be around when they grow up. I am guessing when he gets around to trust that I am around to stay he will come around. But still - it kind of bothers me.. What do you think?

For the kids then we all went swimming together the other day - it went SO well. I was nervous how it would affect him to spend time with my children - considering he must miss his own kids terribly. He was so good with the kids though, he was funny, kind, firm and took them very seriously - no patronising "adult-superiority" BS at all. He did admit afterwards though to having felt a bit bad to actually enjoy himself around other children than his own. But as I fully trusted he is handling his feelings in a very emotionally mature way, allowing them to be without allowing them to determine when he is allowed to feel happy and when not.
I totally think he is the most awesome man on the planet

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#79 of 105 Old 03-16-2009, 04:04 AM
 
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We managed - again - to talk through difficult subjects in a very pleasent way. One importent topic being - children .. I very very much want more children. I am pretty much 100% sure I want more children - where as he is "a bit" traumatized by having lost two children - and a stepdaughter that he raised most of her life and isn't certain he wants more. I dont know how much to push the subject right now - it feels like I should wait and not take it up now. But - on the other hand I dont want to find out 3 years from now that he doestn want children after all. I kind of trust that once he knows me better and trusts out relationship to be for a lifetime he will soften up to the idea of children - his main fear being to father another child/children that he wont be able to be around when they grow up. I am guessing when he gets around to trust that I am around to stay he will come around. But still - it kind of bothers me.. What do you think?
Yay! I'm happy for you!

About children, I guess I would be very aware of whether or not you are seeing him clearly about this. He is telling you what he thinks. Sometimes we don't hear it. Most likely, nothing will change what he thinks/wants. Maybe plan on discussing this lots more so that you have clarity about his position.

Keep us posted!!!
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#80 of 105 Old 03-16-2009, 10:34 AM
 
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About children, I guess I would be very aware of whether or not you are seeing him clearly about this. He is telling you what he thinks. Sometimes we don't hear it. Most likely, nothing will change what he thinks/wants. Maybe plan on discussing this lots more so that you have clarity about his position.
:

Seie: You are going to have to be REALLy clear with him that you are "100% sure" you want more children. This is not something to assume or hope will change.
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#81 of 105 Old 03-16-2009, 11:00 AM
 
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trusts out relationship to be for a lifetime he will soften up to the idea of children
When I first married my XH, I believed and trusted with all my heart that our relationship would be for a lifetime.

What did I learn? There are absolutely NO guarantees in life. NONE.

With my current bf, I very hard to stay in the present (and nearby future ) and enjoy every moment we have together. That way if our relationship ever did end... I could say that I truly enjoyed every moment we had together.

That doesn't mean we are not planning a future together or I wouldn't consider marrying him OR that our relationship couldn't last forever. I truly believe it could last forever.

But, I also know life is transitory and there is a possiblity that the relationship/marriage might not last forever (for various reasons). Regardless, I am willing to take that risk and do what I can do to make the relationship work.

Your bf might be willing to take that risk with his own heart, but due to his past, he might not be willing to take that risk with any additional children.

Trust what he says to you and be cautious in thinking he will 'soften.' I have seen too many relationships/marriages end over this situation.
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#82 of 105 Old 03-16-2009, 11:25 AM
 
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I'm going to have to be very upfront about how I'm sure I ~don't~ want any more children. My two girls run me ragged; the thought of reproducing right now makes my whole body twitch.

You know, I'm thinking about signing up for eHarmony or something, but I really feel like I should wait until ex moves out...

Full time working mom to two bright and busy little girls! treehugger.gif
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#83 of 105 Old 03-16-2009, 11:50 AM
 
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Seie,
This is something you're going to have to work out for yourself. It is best to assume that he's NOT EVER going to change how he feels about having more childen and isn't going to want more children, not now, not this year, not in the future. If you can come to terms with that, then proceed, if you can't, it may be time to re-evaluate. Having kids or not are non-negotiable and can create so much bitterness and resentment that it has the potential to ruin even the strongest of relationships.

I wish you well as you work through your feelings.


Ceinwen,
I think it is best to wait until he's out. I don't know a lot of people who would be keen to date someone still living in the same house as their ex...even if the relationship has been over for some time. It's also really healthy for you to have that physical separation and break too before moving forward.
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#84 of 105 Old 03-17-2009, 12:51 AM
 
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Tell more will ya! What was it like - was he sweet - or was it the dating in itself that was awesome. Are we talking relationship material?
He was amazing. Absolutely amazing. One of the most considerate people I have ever met and our personalities mesh so well. I could absolutely see this being a serious relationship.

Which is so odd, because I never, ever thought I'd even be able to think about a relationship without feeling like puking.

I've seen him almost every day since our first date, even if it's just for a stolen kiss on the sidewalk so the kids can't see me.

I am in shock, extremely happy, and scared to death.

Busy, hectic, HAPPY single mom to 3 awesome kiddos jumpers.gif DD1 (10) DS (8) DD2 (6)

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#85 of 105 Old 03-17-2009, 12:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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He was amazing. Absolutely amazing. One of the most considerate people I have ever met and our personalities mesh so well. I could absolutely see this being a serious relationship.

Which is so odd, because I never, ever thought I'd even be able to think about a relationship without feeling like puking.

I've seen him almost every day since our first date, even if it's just for a stolen kiss on the sidewalk so the kids can't see me.

I am in shock, extremely happy, and scared to death.
That makes me happy When it happens, it happens

                                Whatever will be, already is...
 
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#86 of 105 Old 03-17-2009, 01:38 PM
 
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He was amazing. Absolutely amazing. One of the most considerate people I have ever met and our personalities mesh so well. I could absolutely see this being a serious relationship.

Which is so odd, because I never, ever thought I'd even be able to think about a relationship without feeling like puking.

I've seen him almost every day since our first date, even if it's just for a stolen kiss on the sidewalk so the kids can't see me.

I am in shock, extremely happy, and scared to death.
More hope! This is absolutely fantastic!

As for me, I tried signing up for eHarmony (just to check it out)... spent 20 minutes filling out the application...

Only to be told I don't qualify because I put 'separated' for marital status. :

And it won't let me change it! Not meant to be I'm assuming...

Full time working mom to two bright and busy little girls! treehugger.gif
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#87 of 105 Old 03-18-2009, 08:50 PM
 
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Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! For more happy amazing relationships! Meaning that there are great guys out there for us great mamas!!

I will keep the faith...for one more month. HA.
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#88 of 105 Old 03-20-2009, 07:34 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lah7 View Post
He was amazing. Absolutely amazing. One of the most considerate people I have ever met and our personalities mesh so well. I could absolutely see this being a serious relationship.

Which is so odd, because I never, ever thought I'd even be able to think about a relationship without feeling like puking.

I've seen him almost every day since our first date, even if it's just for a stolen kiss on the sidewalk so the kids can't see me.

I am in shock, extremely happy, and scared to death.



:: So happy for you. ::
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#89 of 105 Old 03-21-2009, 08:06 PM
 
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spring must be happening everywhere! everyone is outside having fun! ::
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#90 of 105 Old 03-22-2009, 10:40 PM
lld
 
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Originally Posted by rubelin View Post

Oh, I got my Four Man Plan book, and it's awesome! I REALLY recommend it for those of you who are getting back into dating. It's very fun and light and all about empowering women to be the godesses we are Butterfly, there's got to be a copy in the UK or Germany that you could get your hands on.

I read this book after feeling hopeless that there were any decent men out there...and if there were, I thought I was too busy to meet them ...I jumped back into dating, men seemed to fall out of the woodwork, I had an amazing time for 4 months...met a great guy...told him I wasn't ready to get serious...he waited for me...and I am no longer on the 4 man plan because he is now my boyfriend... kind, caring, loving, fun and enjoys being with my son...I never thought I could date more than one man and was amazed by how much fun I had in the process
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