Contempt of Court - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 17 Old 03-08-2009, 06:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
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First, I am posting under a "safe" user name. I am a long time poster but at this time I feel safer not using my regular username. Some of you may still recognize me but please don't rat me out.

DC's father who hasn't seen the child in three years (dc is 4) has never paid cs and has an open door to visit, said a couple times he wanted to put never followed through. Goes months upon months with no calls. Dc has no clue who he is, won't talk to him on the phone even though when he does call I encourage it and put him on speaker, dc just does not want to talk. I have been putting pressure on sperm donor to either give up his rights or start paying child support. We started the process of the termination. He does not want to pay child support and he is getting significant pressure from his mother to not give up his rights - if it weren't for this it would have been done.

He filed contempt of court charges against me. For what you ask? For keeping him from seeing and talking to his child. If that isn't ridiculous enough, he filed in the county that I haven't lived in for two years. He knows this, we actually live in another (nearby) state. He knows this, he had my attorney that I used to write up the custody agreement served. He knows that he is no longer my attorney and hasn't been for over two years. I have all of this documented in emails and text messages. He and his attorney purposely filed in this other county to slow things down and make it more difficult for me, its farther for me from home and work, etc. Oh, and he asked that I pay his legal fees. While I am not too worried about the actual contempt charge because it is so absurd and I have tons of email communication with him proving my side of things, I do not want to have to go to court in that county because it is a hassle. My attorney was going to attempt to file the termination papers in that county but they told her no because neither of us had lived there for more than 6 months. But see they lied and claimed they didn't know how to find me, except I have it all documented and while he was looking for an attorney he called my current attorney and she told him she could not talk to him because she was my attorney - just a strange coincidence.

He has nothing to lose, he doesn't work, lives with momma, goes to school on grants and loans, lives across the country and just wants to go without paying child support as long as possible. He has been pondering giving up his writes so DP can adopt dc, I have that in an email as well, which is another reason I put off filing for child support. He has a girlfriend now who I know is pressuring him and along with his mother he says he wants to keep his options "open" in case he ever wants to have a relationship with dc.

What do you guys think? Will they throw it out once they found out they knowingly filed in the wrong district or will I have to go to court there?
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#2 of 17 Old 03-08-2009, 07:37 PM
 
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I have no idea but I didn't want to read without responding. It really sucks that he's doing all of this.
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#3 of 17 Old 03-08-2009, 08:00 PM
 
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Gosh mama. I'm so sorry

What a waste this guy is. :

Just so I have this straight - neither of you currently live in this district where he filed? If anything else, I think it would be a very straight forward case. You've done nothing but make yourself and your dc available, and he has never made a true effort.

It just absolutely rots that he can do this to you again. I sincerely hope that the emails and whatnot are admissable, and that your attorney is a shark. I'd go after him for court costs and contempt. Along with something about wasting the court's time...

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#4 of 17 Old 03-08-2009, 11:05 PM
 
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I am so sorry about what you are going through. I am not to sure how much of a case he would have. I am not atty but that is JMO. Many more

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#5 of 17 Old 03-08-2009, 11:46 PM
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GSM,

You should probably hire your own lawyer if you really want this resolved.

The lawyer will take care of the "wrong venue" problem with a letter. I don't think "knowingly" or "unknowingly" will come into it.

That brings us to rights and c/s. For the rights, you may be in a position to file for termination. You need to talk about that with the lawyer. You might have to wait a while for SD to do the flailing "I'm his real dad" thing, but when he fails to take the opportunity the court gives him to straighten up, you can go back and close.

The c/s is something else, and until the termination is signed by a judge, I'd go ahead and do whatever you can to collect it. The idea of having to pay back support may be enough to get him to sign. Try it and see.
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#6 of 17 Old 03-09-2009, 12:03 AM
 
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i am not sure about the details but i am sure there is going to be a connection with CS and the amount of loans and grants he can get. which might make him be willing to do things your way too.

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#7 of 17 Old 03-09-2009, 12:19 AM
 
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Originally Posted by ginger_rodgers View Post
gsm,

you should probably hire your own lawyer if you really want this resolved.

The lawyer will take care of the "wrong venue" problem with a letter. I don't think "knowingly" or "unknowingly" will come into it.

That brings us to rights and c/s. For the rights, you may be in a position to file for termination. You need to talk about that with the lawyer. You might have to wait a while for sd to do the flailing "i'm his real dad" thing, but when he fails to take the opportunity the court gives him to straighten up, you can go back and close.

The c/s is something else, and until the termination is signed by a judge, i'd go ahead and do whatever you can to collect it. The idea of having to pay back support may be enough to get him to sign. Try it and see.
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i am not sure about the details but i am sure there is going to be a connection with cs and the amount of loans and grants he can get. Which might make him be willing to do things your way too.
ita
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#8 of 17 Old 03-09-2009, 02:22 AM
 
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definitely get a really good attorney and ask for your attorney costs to be paid by him since he is being dishonest.

How annoying, I hope you get good results in court. So many moms lay low and don't make any waves because the courts can be used to harass.
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#9 of 17 Old 03-09-2009, 08:38 AM
 
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Just wanted to give you a hug, my friend. You and your little one don't deserve any more hassle from that UAV.
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#10 of 17 Old 03-09-2009, 08:53 AM
 
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Oh gosh.. I've been here before and it sucks. be strong mama!

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#11 of 17 Old 03-09-2009, 05:10 PM
 
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I think you should let him know that since he's so interested in parenting now, you'll be going for back child support and future child support. I'm sure that'll make him show his true colors.

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#12 of 17 Old 03-10-2009, 08:24 AM
 
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I agree, you should go for the child support and see if he changes his tune.
And I agree that your lawyer (please get one) can change the case to the proper court.

Best wishes. BTW, my ex filed comtempt charges on some crazy stuff. We never got to court. I did file my answers to the court, but ex never took it further. You may only need to file answers. Your attorney may be able to squash that totally. Just document.

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#13 of 17 Old 03-10-2009, 08:26 AM
 
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And can anyone post under this alias? Interesting.

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#14 of 17 Old 03-10-2009, 03:32 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Jyotsna View Post
And can anyone post under this alias? Interesting.
No. What happens is if you have a situation that you feel requires MDC's discussion but not under your regular username, you can write to the moderators and request a guestname, explaining why privacy is important. If they OK it, they'll give you one, and then you can post like this mama is doing.

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#15 of 17 Old 03-10-2009, 05:45 PM
 
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Thank you for the information.

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#16 of 17 Old 03-10-2009, 09:44 PM
 
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I think I know who you are, and while I have no advice, wanted to tell you that you and your sweet dc are in my thoughts and prayers.

(and give you kudos for all of the documentation I KNOW you have!)
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#17 of 17 Old 03-12-2009, 12:04 PM
 
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What a horrible situation. I'm so sorry you're dealing with such an inconsiderate *** of a father.
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