I'm struggling to make a decision here about accommodation and could do with some first hand experience from other single mamas. Basically I've been trying to find a two bedroom with a garden and they are just few and far between in my area. Having a garden is not something I'm prepared to compromise on. And the few 2 beds with gardens that there are, are more often than not priced out of my range. I've been looking for months now. So..i'm starting to consider a one bedroom b/c weirdly enough, there are lots more available in the areas I'd like to live (near friends, support networks, bus routes etc), and many have gardens or at least a patio area. Plus of course, cheaper. But I'm hesitant: at the moment DS (28 months) sleeps with me and nurses at night, but that won't be forever, and I'm worried about feeling claustrophobic after a while. We've moved so much from friend to friend the last few months since we've been homeless, that I just can't face moving again soon after this 'permanent' move. Is it unrealistic to live in a one bedroom reasonably long term with my son?
I know this is an old thread but how did it work out for you two?
I'll be getting my own place when DS and DD are about 2 and 4 years old. I'm debating on whether I should rent a 1 bedroom and save as much as I can or buy a 2 or 3 bedroom.
when i searched around for a place, i couldn't find a two bedroom in my price range that i liked. i ended up finding a one bedroom place that had a space large enough to be divided into two rooms with the magic of drywall. that said, we had lived without the drywall for about two years. needless to say, i didn't have an exciting private life, if you get my drift , so it suited us fine. i decided to pull the wall up only after she was comfortable there and i felt like it was time. good luck in your search.
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Now that's a mouthful!!!
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I just moved into a 1 bedroom walkup with my 5 year old and 3 cats a couple months ago after living with family for several months...And let me tell you it has been heaven..I made the bedroom into L's bedroom with a full size bed...I sleep in there with her most nights although I have a Futon in the living room that we sometimes just fall asleep on also..While the bedroom itself is hers, the closet is mine...It is a bigger long closet..It has the Hot Water Heater in it so I don't want her in there..I have my dresser on the farthest wall away from the heater and use the shelves above for storage(totes with clothes ect..) She(nor anyone else) is allowed in there and I have those child saftey knobs on there as a precausion..She has a dresser in the bedroom,shelves ect...for all her toys and books and clothes...I have a large hall closet that I hang her dresses in and for shoe/coat storage ect...My apartment is also 3 large rooms...Plus a walkin closet in the hall and one in the bedroom..Right now it works...We are cozy..Easy to keep clean and even my cats are comfy..I don't have a washer/dryer in the apt..but down the hallway the owner did put in a set for the tenents($1 to wash and $1 to dry)..Beats carrying to the laundry mat with all these steps..And that is really my only complaint for this apartment..It is on a very high second floor building..Lots of steps..I wish he would put in an elevator but the excercise is nice except in the middle of winter or when I have to carry tons of bags and stuff up them...Also I wish it also had a patio so I could have my box garden/hanging vegetable/fruit plants but it doesn't and I was getting desperate and this is what I could afford and the apartment really is beautiful and well maintained...So I guess I had to give a little to get a lot...Plus being right in town we are next to 3 parks,riverfront and the local library..So we really do have a lot of pluses...I hope it is working out for you...We are pretty happy in ours and have no plans of moving right away..having to live on someone else's couch for a few months make you appreciate you own little piece of Heaven a bit more....lol Oh and another plus for me was I also get free WiFi which I wouldn't be able to afford right now if I lived anywhere else...And with my budget being so low until I go fulltime this is a bonus for me...I need a little interaction with the net world for my own sanity...LO :)
Right now, a one bedroom (one thing to consider, if your son's father makes a big deal, it may have an impact on custody, as in he gets custody) will work if the laws in your state allow it that is. But it won't work forever. When I lived in a house (stupid me tried to keep a house that I couldn't afford), it had 3 bedrooms. The kids had their own rooms. Which they didn't sleep in. At all. Of course, they were younger. When I lost the house and moved to a smaller 2 bedroom apt, I put them in one room and I had a room to myself. I got them a bunk bed (twin over full) and would go in and lay down with the youngest at bedtime. They are now 11 and 13 and don't sleep with me anymore. My 13 year old son is too old and I am just not comfortable with it. And both of them prefer to sleep by themselves now anyway.
Now on to the part of your post about your refusal to compromise, reality is that you may not be able to find a 2 bedroom apt (which you may have no choice if your ex makes a stink about a one bedroom) with a garden that you can afford. Refusing to compromise isn't going to change that. You can grow a garden in pots if you want. It may not be the same as using the ground, but it's better than nothing. And while you are living in this place that you can afford, work on being able to get into a position that you can afford what you would prefer.
^^^^This thread is 3 years old. I'm sure the OP has long since made this decision.
Yes but I'm sure it would help others. I lived in a 450 sq ft 1 bedroom with my 6 yr old and infant when we moved into a 2 bedroom. Now we have moved across the country and I'm staying with my parents while I look for work and going INSANE. I'm honestly considering a studio or 1 bedroom for the 3 of us because I can't find anything I can afford. We've gotten really good at organizing cramped tiny spaces so I think we will be fine in a studio or 1 bedroom, all I ask for is a gas stove, working oven and a decent sized kitchen. Everything else is negotiable lol:)
Satori...I hear you with living with relatives..Doesn't work for everyone and didn't work for me...I am thinking of another baby soon and we will still be comfortable living in this 1 bedroom apartment with me,my almost 6 year old and an infant...I say go for it... :) I happy in my 1 bedroom apartment and so is my L and my 3 cats...We have plenty of room for one more...
Hi everyone. Was surprised to see this thread resurrected - I'm the OP :) I ended up getting a two bedroom after all - I found one that was a real bargain - but just compromised on garden space and size of kitchen. It did have some problems like damp though (which only emerged later), so I now do think it would've prob been better to perhaps get a one bedroom. I don't think my ex would've had a leg to stand on as after he ran out of money (after we split) he soon ended up living in houseshares, with one room to himself and our son more often than not sharing the bed with him. Having said that, I subsequently moved into a TINY two bedroom cottage. My son (5 now) has ended up sleeping in my bed again and his bedroom seems like a bit of a waste... but it is useful for toy storage and for when he has a friend round, as our living room is not a large enough space to play in with more than one child. Hope you all found what was right for you and your LO's!
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