I am not answering your question, but maybe my input will trigger some responses.
I have been separated for only a month and this time is final. He has moved on, I am in the process of moving on.
However, we were separated most of 2009 and we did 50/50 and it worked just fine. So this time around we applied 50/50 since the day he left.
my stbx is a horrible partner, I don't like him as a person. However he is a great father, he takes excellent care of our son, cooks for him, ensures he is always wearing clean clothes, talks to his teachers at the preschool, do all the little projects they assign parents (I am horrible with crafts) etc etc.
I just know my lo is on excellent hands when he is with his dad. He gets some father time, I get me time, which I need a lot right now that I am healing.
No regrets so far.