STBX and I are still living together and planning to separate soon. It's his choice...not sure if he is thinking divorce or just trial separation at this point. We are living together amicably for the most part, however, discussing child custody is starting to lead to some very heated arguments. My attorney hasn't had much to offer on this (guess I need to start looking for a new attorney). How do you come to agree on something like this if you both have just completely different ideas in mind? FWIW, he is saying that 2 1/2 yo dd should stay with him nights while 5 mo old ds stays with me. I am all for both kids spending several hours every day with him, but not ok with dd spending all nights with him. We are at a standstill on this issue, so I'm not sure how we come to agreement without filing for divorce yet?