You COULD be happy in a relationship. And you could even maybe find a man who would let you stay home, oh wait, but you won't "settle" for a man who might make good money and let you stay home, but is just not edukated enough for you.
If you cut yourself off from men before even giving them a chance, you will never find anyone. A degree does not equal education or refinement. As a PhD student, I have been around a lot of educated and uneducated men. The difference is only important to those who are insecure about their own position in society.
I don't think there is a "right way" to do this thing called Life. Please don't beat yourself up about your choices! I've learned that the easiest way to feel badly about my self is to compare my life to someone else's. Everyone has things they are working on or need to work on. C'est la vie!
I've gotten to the point where happy couples bring joyous feelings into my body and I can't wait to get married, again! I worked on me and now, I feel ready to be a partner to someone else. Life is good!
Yes, yes. I'm fabulous. Moving on...
But someday, I hope to be half of one of those elderly couples that seems to have been together forever. I guess I better get cracking on finding a partner for that.
When it comes to friends, I'm either happy for them or a touch cynical, depending on how I evaluate the state of their marriage, keeping in mind that I'm an outsider and things may not always be what they seem.
"Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead. Sometimes you're behind. The race is long. And in the end it is only with yourself." - Baz Luhrman
Not saying it will always be easy, but it will always be worth it. Good luck and remember there is a perfect stranger out there who hopes for your happiness.
I can say even since I last posted on this thread... I feel better about happy couples. I've accepted that my set of cards was to go this pregnancy alone, for likely a very good reason set by the Higher Powers that be.
I can see myself becoming a stronger person. I know that I have found a lot of answers from this past relationship in regards to my life. And that information/knowledge has been priceless.
So, I'm going to agree with some of the PP's who stated seeing happy couples/marriages makes them hopeful. That is how I feel at the moment. I'm a romantic at heart, and I beleive something better/more is out there for me yet. The time is just not right now. Right now, I'm regaining me, and learning/growing to be one hell of a strong Mama. lol
Proud Single Mama, Birth & Postpartum Doula
Student, Aspiring CNM
DD ~ 1/7/09 DS ~ 9/22/10
And Phoenix~Mama - it sounds like you are doing a great job & going in the right direction! There is something better for you and it ALWAYS starts from within. It may sound overly simple or cliched but I've found it to be true. We are literally surrounded by an often hostile world going through some very dark times - to see ANYONE happy gives me joy, and I don't need to know who they are or why they are happy. It is just enough that they are. Because it is often so tenuous, everyone deserves whatever they can get for however long it lasts.
Former wearing, ing, pole dancing, pushing, survivor & single mama extraordinaire to .
Now that's a mouthful!!!
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OP-I feel your pain. I was a former military wife and the worst is to go on my facebook and she all these SAHMs to school aged kids whose husband bring in the money and they get to be ladies of leisure all day while I work two jobs and no man wants me....good times....
Mama~Blogger~Artist~Homemaker. Family = DH (married 6 years), baby Elinor, and our puppy Frances.