Trick or Treat? That is the question.... OCTOBER Dating Thread! - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-01-2010, 06:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Let's all decide that when it comes to dating decisions, no tricking ourselves allowed. We deserve someone who is a healthy treat to have in our lives.

Cool as a Cucumber has digested all my thoughts on verbalizing/showing his feelings more, & has made adorable babysteps to meet me in the middle already! That Sweetie. A saucy, seductive text message that left me feeling wanted, initiation of political discussions, and a couple of compliments to my face that are already more than enough to leave me beaming and wipe away any insecurities I had. Because it's brand spanking new to him, probably awkward as hell, but he's making the effort to meet my needs for these explicit signals, from time to time.

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Old 10-01-2010, 06:49 PM
 
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That's fantastic, Butterfly!!! Congratulations on CAAC coming through! I am fortunate, in that mine is very expressive in every way!

Jen - Mommy to 2 little heathens: Lexi (5 years old) and JJ (16 Months Old)
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Old 10-01-2010, 07:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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You ARE lucky!
I'm starting to feel silly that I ever doubted Cool Cucumber. He said he's been thinking about it and decided he's ready to meet & build rapport with my kids. I'm with them just 1/3 of the time as of now, so it's been normal thusfar that Cucumber leaves us our space when I'm with my kids, but now I think we both start to want to not go 5 days without seeing each other every other week, and besides that it's important that he start dipping his toes into the reality that I'm a mama, and we see how that goes. I'll just casually introduce him as a friend, they won't register any significance during the next couple month, is my plan. Mommy has lots of friends who satellite around me, after all.
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Old 10-01-2010, 10:44 PM
 
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It's a trick. Dating is all an evil trick. That's where I'm at.

:/
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Old 10-02-2010, 04:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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(((((sugarmoon)))))
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Old 10-02-2010, 11:04 AM
 
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I'm with Sugarmoon on this one, dating right now is an evil trick..........

I have a "date" planned with paramedic tomorrow and I am not even that excited about it after he put his pof profile back up last night. Granted I have had mine up for a few weeks, but he told me to move on! Anyway I am chatting with a somewhat promising man right now on there, hopefully I can turn the month around and end up with a treat!

Hugs to you ((((((Sugarmoon))))) and yay!!!! for CAAC making baby steps butterfly!
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Old 10-02-2010, 03:55 PM
 
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Thanks for the hug, Butterfly. Catch me on chat sometime after this weekend. I'll either be really happy, really sad, or totally confused. Or more than likely, a mix of all three.

Yeah...

momanderson, I'm rooting for you. Not for medic, you understand, but for YOU. And maybe that includes him, I don't know.

And Butterfly, YES! Hooray, on CAC getting the hints, and opening his mouth, and letting the compliments flow. That one may just be the keeper. Lord knows you deserve it!
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Old 10-03-2010, 12:26 PM
 
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Agreed. Dating sucks. It's so hard to find the right person.

I was chatting with this guy that I had talked to a long time ago on OKCupid yesterday. We were having a good talk and I was enjoying it and he seemed cool, so I agreed to meet up with him tonight. We settled the place and time and all and I said I had to go and do some other things and I'd see him the next day. He tried to argue me out of logging out. We had been chatting for over an hour and a half at that point, which was way longer than I had intended. So I repeated that I had stuff to do and I'd see him soon. He asked if we could talk on the phone later. No, I'm busy. He still didn't drop it at that point, so I canceled our meeting right then and there. I've never backed out like that before, but he was making me uncomfortable. Creepy clingy guys suck.

There are a few that I'm talking to otherwise, but I'm not too excited about any of them. Although, I am a bit tempted to take up a really hot 25 year old guy on the very dirty and fun proposition he made.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
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Old 10-03-2010, 01:45 PM
 
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Oops, wrong thread.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
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Old 10-03-2010, 06:23 PM
 
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Dating is difficult. I'll just call mine what he is, Tall Dark and Handsome, lol. So TDH expressed interest through a cute lil note. We worked together for a short time. I told him, I might be interested but 3 things must be known. 1) I have 2 kids, they are my life and they come first 2) no more babies, not now, not ever. I have 2 and that's enough and 3) You have to accept me for me, I will not change for anyone ever again.

He was cute. He said I know your kids come first. I would be disappointed in anything less. I never wanted kids, still don't but I would be more than happy to help you raise yours if we get to that point. And I am attracted to you, who you are, your smile and your intelligent mind. I wouldn't want you to change a thing. 10 months later, things are still the same, not a thing has changed as far as how either of us act or get along. He's perhaps not perfect, but perfect for me.

But had he not been, if things had happened differently, I'd have left him in an instant. I've been through hell and back again, and I refuse to do that again. I know that if you want him, the right man is out there for you ladies. I moved 1500 miles to find mine.

Jen - Mommy to 2 little heathens: Lexi (5 years old) and JJ (16 Months Old)
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Old 10-03-2010, 07:15 PM
 
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Internet dating is kind of bizarre - I go from thinking.. well this is fun, to this is kind of creepy to I'm deleting my account. Maybe I'm not as ready to 'get out there' as I thought I was. I do have a promising contact that I'm supposed to dinner with on Friday - he does TCM and acupuncture - so can I call him Poke Doctor We have alot in common, which is very different from my ex and I. And this match is on the coat tails of several dates with a man I have been referring to as 'Chubby Biker'.. I wasnt super attracted to him, but he was so nice and seemed so geniune and interested. So we went out a few times (5 times) and then he just quit calling - I contacted him (voice mail, email, facebook, text) and 1 week later he calls like nothing was wrong. We had been talking almost everyday. I told him I wasnt ok with him ignoring me and that I wouldnt be seeing him again. He seemed stunned ?? really?? Do you know who I am? I am a woman, a mother and a human being - you dont treat people that way. It's rude and inconsiderate. You certainly will not be treating me that way. c-ya.. I think he was trying to play some kind of game or something.. but I'm over it.
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Old 10-04-2010, 04:35 AM
 
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I just wanted to pop in and say I feel extremely lonely...... I am dating a couple men who are not THE ONE and I have several girl friends but no close friends. My weekends feel empty. I don't desire to go to bars, etc. (they just don't feel fulfilling) and I don't want to pay a sitter to be with people - potential suitors and gal pals alike - that are not going to manifest into a deeper friendship. Maybe it is something with me but, my circle is large but no one desires me as a BFF or the potential to be BFF's because they already have one....(with gal pals) or THE ONE with suitors. How can I know so many people, go so many places and feel so utterly alone?

"There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way and not starting." - Buddha.
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Old 10-04-2010, 09:02 AM
 
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((((LoveOhm))))) I'm sorry. And I understand. I have been seriously working on the "Keep busy, widen your circle, have a social life, on your own" strategy this summer, and while for the most part it has been good, there is also a new kind of loneliness that comes with being in the midst of many people.

ATG is.....around. I'm no more clear about that than I was on Saturday morning, though he came over Saturday night, and there was some serious whiskey drinking (really!) and political discussion. Then, in the morning, I think we were both pretty confused, unsure, and regretful.

But, he came over again last night, for just hanging out, watching a movie, cooking dinner etc. Which was really nice, but not providing me with answers.

Ugh.
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Old 10-04-2010, 09:18 AM - Thread Starter
 
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(((((LoveOhm))))))
come to NYC and we can be BFFs this week.
sitting on a plane that's about to take off, heading to the big apple!
Sugar, I'm worried that this thing with ATG isnt good for you. Take care of your heart above all else, as it is the foundation of your life & your kids' lives.

Cucumber continues to be perfect. We played outside with my kids all afternoon yesterday. This dude is awesome with children, so stable, warm, and easy going. Like a humongous oak tree that's great to climb or read a book underneath, hug, or even build a home next to. I love that he is everything I shattered (painfully with lasting damages) my first family to find in this life. I'm slightly scared of having my heart so vulnerable again (since 2yrs ago with VGB) but.... He keeps giving me reasons to feel secure & optimistic that he is serious about me.
We booked a 6 day trip to Spain last night. We leave in two months. It feels stable & comfy & blissful.
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Old 10-04-2010, 11:21 AM
 
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Butterfly. I know. I am actually kind of angry with him this morning, for opening that door again. It had been closed, we had been spending a lot of time together, but clearly as friends, with the door to "more" closed. And now it's been opened, kind of, and I don't really know what to do about that.

I do know that I really enjoy having him around, and that I trust him. I do. That doesn't mean I don't think he will behave in human ways, or even downright stupid ones, in the future, but I do trust that he and I have some kind of connection that will last, and can last, through whatever comes next.

And...I dunno. I can always distract myself with the Shy Commuter.

Cucumber sounds great. So great. And I'm so so so happy for you. No one deserves it more than you.
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Old 10-04-2010, 09:41 PM
 
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Dating sucks, but running into random awesome guys doesn't!

Yesterday, I went into my local coffee shop and started an awesome conversation with this really cute guy. I was planning to go to my yoga class after my coffee, but I skipped it to sit and talk. It was the easiest conversation and we had tons in common it seems. We're both teachers, he has a son about my daughter's age, he had read the book I was reading and he was reading the NYT while he drank his coffee and we talked about some of the stories. We walked out together and he asked if we could hang out again sometime, so we exchanged numbers. A few minutes ago he texted me about a story related to one of our conversation topics and said he hoped we could get together soon. I haven't answered yet, but I will definitely make plans with him again this week. Or maybe I should put it off a little bit so I can calm down??? I need to not get my hopes up too much, because I have a tendency to allow things to move too fast. But really? Major swoon!

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
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Old 10-05-2010, 01:48 AM
 
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Things with Paramedic are going well again, I am happy to say! We had a wonderful date Sunday that actually started when he came over after work Saturday evening. We talked, about a lot of stuff. It was good. He even said we need to learn to communicate better! That is big, he's a guy and wants to learn to communicate better

We spent Sunday sight seeing and taking pics of the fall colours, then went on a boat cruise on an 1800's steam ship and out for dinner. It was really nice! The cruise was about 1.5 hours from where we live and he had driven down the week before to get our tickets since he doesn't have a credit card. I was impressed he planned it so much!

He called me tonight and we talked a bit. Then he told me he deleted his POF profile and I am so happy about that! When we were together before I had deleted mine, but he had only hid his. That was always an issue for me. Now I don't have to worry about it! I was so glad he did it on his own and I didn't have to ask him too! I deleted mine aswell tonight.

I am still being cautious, but he is making a lot more effort. Even cancelled a fishing trip to spend time with me on Wednesday
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Old 10-06-2010, 01:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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momanderson - I really think you need to keep your heart a bit guarded until this guy has changed his stripes (and kept the new ones on) for a lot longer. If it's right, if it's meant to be, then it will still be right (and he will wait) even 6 months or a year before you throw your heart wide open and take a chance on a relationship with this guy.
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Old 10-06-2010, 06:51 PM
 
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Dating sucks, but running into random awesome guys doesn't!
um hi - i am so not dating yet (separated 3 months, not divorced, busy parenting, etc) . . . but i just wanted to tell someone about this, and this seemed like the right thread! i have this old friend i've probably known for about 7 or 8 years. i've never crushed on him, but have always thought he was a really awesome person - smart, down-to-earth, responsible, and i love all his fb posts about his child, his spirituality, being in nature, music and other mutual interests. he's someone i would love to know better (because even though we've known each other a long time, the nature of my relationship with stbx was such that i basically never talked to men other than brief friendly exchanges, no long conversations or i'd hear all about it later from stbx). and he's hot. extremely hot.

so anyway, i ran into him, and that was awesome. that's all.
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Old 10-06-2010, 08:35 PM
 
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Hi everyone. I like the 'intention' for this month- not tricking ourselves..hhmm, I need to work on that!

Mimim, sounds exciting! I love random 'synchronicitous' meetings like that...it's usually how i meet people actually - given up on the internet dating thing!
Butterflymom, that's amazing to hear CAAC is taking on board your input and willing to meet your kids... wow!
momanderson, it does sound like the Paramedic is 'romancing' you but I agree with Butterflymom, try to keep guarded if possible and let him prove he has changed...
doubledutch, hhmm, sounds like major potential, but yes, 3 months after separating, ouch... maybe it could be a slow burning thing.

The Accountant Guy I met weekend before last ended up cancelling coming down to see me last weekend because he realised that although he was 'completely attracted to me', he 'couldn't be reliable' and didn't want to 'mess me about' as he has only recently split up with someone But 5 minutes after that conversation he was texting me saying he'd really like to come down and see me and was so tempted... he wanted me to contact him when I'm next in his city (in 10 days time)...and sent me nice texts about having loved cuddling up to me on the couch (when we met and ended up getting snuggly)...so he's pretty much left the ball in my court but I don't think I'm going to play, tempting as it is! He is cute and I'm v drawn to him but I think if he can't be bothered to come down and see me, but is happy to see me if I'm right in his neighbourhood, then he's not really worth it - actually pretty lazy really. Or just isn't really keen enough to bother.

But weirdly, my friend's housemate seems to interested in me at the moment - I also met him that same weekend and he was giving me 'vibes', and now he's been Facebooking me at least once a day, often very flirtatious comments etc (though respectful), showing a lot of interest in me, wanting to read my poetry etc. He's really nice and ticks a lot of boxes of what I'm looking for BUT - and these are big buts - he is 26 years my senior and (perhaps for that reason) I don't find him particularly attractive. Oh well.

Tonight at dance class I connected with a guy who (ages ago) had a fling with one of my friends and who I've bumped into now and then over the years. He's REALLY cute and also into a lot of the same stuff as me (and my age). He walked back with me from dance and we had a chat but big BAGGAGE ALERT - he has serious issues with his ex which was mainly what he chatted about. But he's clearly looking for a relationship... well it's nice to have possiblities but why are they are all so 'not right'! Sigh. I am feeling it would be so nice to have someone to cuddle up with...
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Old 10-06-2010, 09:12 PM
 
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doubledutch - A crush! Fun! I hope you run into him again.

Devaya, you have a lot going on! I hope you are enjoying it, but I know what you mean about "not right". I think I'm in the same place at the moment.

I haven't seen Coffee Shop Guy again yet, but I will next week. I'm trying to take it nice and slow. He might be too "normal" for me really.

Also, a guy that I spent only one night with over a year ago just got in touch with me. We have talked from time to time about getting together again since we met, but only actually saw each other that once. I am always pleased when I hear from him. I get a tiny surge of affection - "Oh, look. There's the Bicycle Boy again." Hmm. I'm not sure if I wanna go for meaningless sex, but he's very tempting.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
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Old 10-07-2010, 05:10 PM
 
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Okay, so a few months ago, I saw this really cute guy at the bank where my firm banks. I didn't think much of it, other than "Wow!"

Fast-forward to about 2 weeks ago. I was eating lunch at this little diner, and he came in and sat at the counter. I had a great view of him, but he really couldn't see me unless he turned around, which he didn't. (As a side note: I almost sat at the counter that day, but opted for a booth, instead. I'm still kicking myself for that decision!) After he left, I asked the waitress (we're friends) if she knew anything about him and she told me that his name was Dave and that he worked....wait for it....at the bank where my firm banks.

OKAY. The next day I had to go to the bank for work. (I promise I didn't just randomly go there!) I asked my friend who is a teller there about Dave's situation (gay or straight, taken or available, et cetera). When she told me that he was both straight and available, I gave her my work phone number and asked her to give it to him. She said, "I'm going to email him right now....he'll be so excited."

And then....nothing for a week.

A couple of days ago, I was back in the bank for work and she asked if she could give him my home number, because he had asked for it, saying that he could only reach me at my work number from 9-5, and those are the same hours he worked, so it was tough for him to call me at that number. So I said yes. And still nothing.

I'm tempted to give him a call at his office and invite him out for a walk along the river at lunchtime one day next week. (The river is right near the bank, and the leaves are just turning - it's gorgeous there right now.)

Thoughts? Is the walk idea too pushy and stalkerish? Was he just being polite asking for my home number, or is it safe to assume that he is interested in at least speaking to me on the phone? Any other ideas on how I can solve the "I think you're cute, but you have no earthly idea what I look like" connundrum?

TIA!

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Old 10-07-2010, 05:20 PM
 
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I'm tempted to give him a call at his office and invite him out for a walk along the river at lunchtime one day next week. (The river is right near the bank, and the leaves are just turning - it's gorgeous there right now.)

Thoughts? Is the walk idea too pushy and stalkerish? Was he just being polite asking for my home number, or is it safe to assume that he is interested in at least speaking to me on the phone?
i think the walk is the perfect low-key way to chat and have it not be a big deal, but since he asked for your home number so he could call you off-the-clock, i wouldn't call him at work. hmm. next time you go to the bank:
a. if you see him, introduce yourself and ask if he wants to take that walk
or
b. if you don't see him, ask that friend for his number. he must be okay with that, or he wouldn't have asked for yours.

eta: i also think since it was only a couple of days since he got your number, that's only a couple of evenings when he may have already been really busy, and didn't get a chance to call. i mean, if i were calling my mom or something, i will just call when i'm in my car or whatever. but a phone call like that, i would want to have nothing else going on. i don't think it means anything that he hasn't called yet, and there is no way he asked for your home number just to be polite.
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Old 10-07-2010, 05:37 PM
 
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...next time you go to the bank:
...if you don't see him, ask that friend for his number. he must be okay with that, or he wouldn't have asked for yours.
I can't believe I didn't think of this on my own.

ETA: you don't think it's pushy for me to call him?

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Old 10-10-2010, 06:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Cucumber has kinds slacked off, after a promising end-of-September. I'm now seriously jonesing for something slightly romantic to come from him. Hmm.
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Old 10-11-2010, 12:41 AM
 
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There is also a new kind of loneliness that comes with being in the midst of many people.

ATG is.....around. I'm no more clear about that than I was on Saturday morning...
It feels nice to be understood. I do feel alone in a sea of acquaintances. Not sure about opening that door with ATG but I do hope you can stay friends.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mimim View Post
Dating sucks, but running into random awesome guys doesn't!

Yesterday, I went into my local coffee shop and started an awesome conversation with this really cute guy. I was planning to go to my yoga class after my coffee, but I skipped it to sit and talk. It was the easiest conversation and we had tons in common it seems. We're both teachers, he has a son about my daughter's age, he had read the book I was reading and he was reading the NYT while he drank his coffee and we talked about some of the stories. We walked out together and he asked if we could hang out again sometime, so we exchanged numbers. A few minutes ago he texted me about a story related to one of our conversation topics and said he hoped we could get together soon. I haven't answered yet, but I will definitely make plans with him again this week. Or maybe I should put it off a little bit so I can calm down??? I need to not get my hopes up too much, because I have a tendency to allow things to move too fast. But really? Major swoon!
I agree. To me dating sucks but running into nice guys and/or being in a healthy relationship doesn't. I tend to meet my guys in similar ways as you met the one above or at events friends host like dinner parties and BBQs. I would get together sooner than later and just do something casual like tea at first.

Devaya ~ I would let the Accountant Guy go. He is showing similar patterns to a man I dated and honestly it's just not worth it in the end for you. You deserve to be courted by a man not to run after or try to convince someone you are worth making a priority. The housemate seems interesting..... I look forward to those updates!

"well it's nice to have possiblities but why are they are all so 'not right'! Sigh. I am feeling it would be so nice to have someone to cuddle up with..."

ditto ditto ditto!

kathirynne ~ I would wait on him to call you or for you to run into him..... but that is just me. You have done your part.

Butterflymom ~ I am sorry I am lost it seemed Cucumber had improved in showing and telling you of his affections. What is it that he was promising was to happen at the end-of-September??? Hopefully the romance will be over the moon again soon.

"There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way and not starting." - Buddha.
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Old 10-11-2010, 12:44 AM
 
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I am been MIA this month because of custody stuff but now court has passed so read the update here: http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1269864

"There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way and not starting." - Buddha.
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Old 10-11-2010, 01:57 AM
 
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Hi. I think I'm back.
I took some serious time off of dating, jeez, almost a full year ago. I got really smitten with the jazz composer, who talked this huge talk and turned out to be a total narcissist with a girlfriend. I put some serious time into self-growth and trying to figure out and break old patterns.
In the spring, I met this incredibly nice guy. He's close friends with two separate groups of my friends, and I'm kind of surprised we hadn't met before. All of our mutual friends have nothing but glowing things to say about him. He's cute, in a tall, skinny geeky kind of way, and incredibly intelligent, and educated, and just really, really nice. We went on about three dates and I really enjoyed his company, but about that time things with my ex went haywire and I think I just wasn't ready. But I kept on thinking about him a little bit, and thinking he was exactly the kind of guy I needed to be with, and beating myself up a little for letting it slip away. He was out of town all summer doing a work project (he just finished his masters degree).
I didn't date at all over the summer, and my life was crazy busy taking classes I needed before grad school started. Then I went to this professional conference at the end of July and met this cute young reporter (he's like, seven years younger than me ) who lives a couple hours away from me. I wound up hanging out with him and a bunch of people from his paper that night, and we had this terrifically fun night on the town, and then we went back to the hotel to talk about politics. We stayed in touch after the conference, and he wound up coming down to visit me every two or three weeks over the last few months. We obviously weren't going to be soul mates, but we enjoyed each other's company. It was warm and affectionate and a lot of fun, in a kind of Stella getting her groove back sort of way.
So anyway...I went to my friend's daughter's first birthday party a couple weekends ago, and the incredibly nice guy was there. We wound up talking almost the whole time, and I was reminded again of how much I just really liked him as a person. At the end of the party I kind of shyly said something about how we should hang out at some point. But I was the one who let it fizzle out the first time, and I wasn't sure if he would want to try again.
This weekend, cute young reporter guy was supposed to come visit me, but he called on Thursday really apologetic saying that a bunch of his friends were going camping, and could we postpone it until next weekend? And I said that wasn't a problem.
So...I texted the incredibly nice guy, and asked him if he wanted to get together. And he said yes. And we went out last night and had the best time ever, just talking and talking and talking. We share so many of the same core philosophies and believe the same things. And then we kissed. We picked up DS from the babysitter and went back to my place and we kept on kissing for literally two hours straight. Nothing (much) more than that happened, and we actually had a conversation that we both liked each other a lot and didn't want to rush into anything. It was so incredibly good, though. It actually was kind of terrifying how raw and vulnerable and honest it felt.
So, yeah. He texted me today saying he had a wonderful time and we're hanging out again either Tuesday or Thursday, depending on my work. And I sent the cute reporter boy a message telling him how much I enjoyed hanging out with him the last few months, but I met someone and I wanted to give it an honest shot and see where it might lead.
So I'm very, very, very cautiously optimistic that this could be the start of something good. The one crappy thing is that he just finished his masters and he's applying for jobs all over the country, though he wants to stay in this town if at all possible.
So anyway, I've had a smile on my face today.

Jen, journalist, policy wonk, and formerly a proud single mama to my sweet little man Cyrus, born at home Dec. 2007 . Now married to my Incredibly Nice Guy and new mama to baby Arthur.
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Old 10-11-2010, 06:05 AM
 
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[QUOTE=LoveOhm;15933950]

Devaya ~ I would let the Accountant Guy go. He is showing similar patterns to a man I dated and honestly it's just not worth it in the end for you. You deserve to be courted by a man not to run after or try to convince someone you are worth making a priority. The housemate seems interesting..... I look forward to those updates!

LoveOhm, I agree...but now slighly confused as Accountant Guy has contacted me again (after me not contacting him for a week) and said he's got a week off next week, would I like to hang out - he suggested coming down to see me...so now he DOES seem to be making an effort - when the day he suggested didn't suit me b/c I have my son with me, he offered to re-arrange another commitment he had so he could come down on the day that's convenient for me...but whether it will actually happen remains to be seen. I really liked him when when we met but now the momentum's sort of been lost, I'm feeling nervous about seeing him again, b/c it might have just been a physical attraction - he seems really sweet and he makes me laugh a lot but somehow this stage of 'we are interested in each other and going to see where it goes' always brings up a lot of fear in me..I kind of prefer it when it all just 'happens' if you know what I mean! As for the 'housemate' guy, he's lovely but the age difference is just too much...I mean, would you guys consider a 26 year age gap??Is it just me??

I'm starting to feel v confused about what I really want - not sure if it's a 'relationship' at the moment so much as just someone to see sometimes, and not have anything too heavy going on - but I know if I were to meet 'the right one' I would toss that all out in a second On Sat night I was at an amazing party full of arty people and LOADS of cute guys, and had a great time flirting and dancing...I think in a way I'm enjoying those aspects of being single too much to give it up for just any guy...and then I bumped into a guy I'd got chatting to a week ago after dance class, Arty Guy let's call him - he's quite cute, very sweet and gentle, and seems sincere - who has just moved to the area. He seemed to really enjoy talking to me and I know I'll bump into him again....and he's really more the type of guy I see potential with, than the Accountant Guy is - b/c he's into spiritual and arty things whereas the Accountant Guy is open to those things but not actually doing them...so he's actually living the life rather than just dreaming about it.

Kathyrinne, I agree with LoveOhm - I would leave the ball in the banker guy's court for now, as he knows you are interested...good luck! He does sound interested...

*MamaJen*, exciting to read your post - this guy sounds great, and it's so cool when that strong connection is there, and it's mutually felt. Keep us posted!
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Old 10-11-2010, 08:01 AM - Thread Starter
 
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LoveOhm, I'm sorry I was cryptic.
I meant that when we first discussed things at the end of last month, he really made an effort to open up his mouth & speak up a few nice things to me.... but now the last week or so things have kind of fizzled back to the old, mum ways. When I brought it up Saturday night, he was sort of like, "Come on, what do you expect? I'm a regular guy...." but....he was drinking at the time & he might have been a little dismissive & light hearted about it because of some intoxication.
Yesterday we had the best night ever, sans verbal romance, but....... him shining in what comes naturally--non-verbal demonstration of the emotional support & physical affection categories.

I want it all!
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