Still not excited... - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Thread Tools
#1 of 2 Old 11-14-2011, 11:43 PM - Thread Starter
wanderelm's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 5
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I'm currently six months pregnant with my first child, a son. When I first found out I was scared, but kind of excited, especially when my boyfriend was so happy with the news. Now though, I find myself thinking horrible thoughts about miscarriage (I haven't had an easy pregnancy and it's still a possibility), and what my life would be like right now if I wasn't pregnant, or what my life is going to be like once I have my baby. I'm currently unemployed, I was in the process of being laid off when I found out I was pregnant. Now it's practically impossible to find a job due to my need for maternity leave in a few months. All I can think about is how I can't go back to school as soon as I was planning, or how I didn't really get to enjoy my youth since I lived at home for so long. I'm 22 years old, lived on my own for one year, and now, I'll never be alone again. Am I a horrible person for resenting this child so much? I do love him, and I can't wait to meet him, but I'm scared because I do have these thoughts and I worry that I won't be a good mother to him. My boyfriend is super happy about the pregnancy, and my parents aren't thrilled, but they've accepted it. They love the baby, but are still upset about the circumstances. Many of my friends feel the same way as my parents, or they react as many young people do, "Ew, a baby?" I feel like there's no one I can talk to.

wanderelm is offline  
#2 of 2 Old 11-15-2011, 10:20 AM
shayinme's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: land of lobster and lighthouses
Posts: 5,272
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

No, you sounds like you are dealing with loss, loss of the life you envisioned. I had my son at 19, he is now 19 and I will be honest I did not enjoy my pregnancy with him at all but he is now the light of my life along with his sister. Give yourself time to grieve and time to accept the changes, I often joke it's one reason pregnancy is 9 months, to give us time to adjust.

Mothering since 1992...its one of the many hats I wear.
shayinme is offline  

Quick Reply
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:


Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.

User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page

Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off