How to support a soon to be single mom? - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 2 Old 03-14-2012, 03:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
AnkaJones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 287
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

My sister in law's husband was just diagnosed with terminal cancer (life expectancy < 3 months).  While we're all hoping and praying for a miracle, she will most likely be a single mom of a wonderful 7 year old daughter within the year.  I want to support her in any way possible without being intrusive.  Do any of you have any ideas?

 

Anka


hippie.gifwife to DH, new mom to babyboy.gif 7/4/2011.  femalesling.GIF familybed1.gif BFPChart2.gif cd.gif knit.gif

"I remember my mother's prayers and they have followed me.  They have clung to me all my life." -- Abraham Lincoln. 

AnkaJones is offline  
#2 of 2 Old 03-15-2012, 03:05 PM
 
sren's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: a woodsy place
Posts: 1,265
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)

Oh, wow, that's really tough.  She is fortunate to have such a caring family member. 

 

I know that my experience is that many people say, "Let me know what I can do" but that puts an additional burden on the person needing help to figure out what and how to ask.  It is much more helpful to hear specifics from people-- figure out what you can do and then make it available to her.  For example, "These are the specific days this month where I am available, and I'd like to take your DD to the park/movies/museum.  Are there any errands we can run while we are out?"

"What appointments (doctor or otherwise) do you have coming up where it would be helpful for me to watch DD?  I'd like to pitch in with household chores while I'm at your place.  Would that be alright?"

 

You will probably need to ask more than once, and she may have a lot of initial offers of support.  They tend to decline after initial diagnosis and then pick up again around a funeral and then decline again pretty rapidly.  Hope this helps, and I'm sorry for the terrible news.


and then when we get to the ocean
we're gonna take a boat to the end of the world

sren is online now  
Reply

Tags
Single Parenting

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off